I still believe in what I said. The pattern of me doing something, and then her doing it to me, appears multiple times in this conversation. The most obvious one, is the one where I say "you've left me no choice", and then her manifesting that same feeling towards the end of the conversation. The part where she says I'm causing her stress, but then in the same breath says that it's my problem if I'm feeling a certain way just because I was wrong about it. The part where she admits that she wasn't mean to me intentionally but then tries to absolve herself of all sin because of it, but then completely ignored my intentions throughout this whole conversation which were echoing as clear as day. The fact that she called me out on not being able to handle the truth, but she was the one who wasn't able to handle it and openly admitted that she couldn't face it to me around 10 times in this conversation: sometimes by directly saying it, sometimes by pivoting. And I never believed for a second that she couldn't handle it, despite all of that. That's why I kept going.

She tried to antagonize me by implying it was my fault I didn't know that she was starving and without money, but she was the one who never told me. She expected me to know because I'm a mind reader. It seems like she has forgotten the lessons she learned the past the last time that this happened, but that time she came out on top. She tried to suicide so that someone would come and save her so that she could prove to herself that I loved her, and used the logic that "If I really cared about her and who I said I was and truly had superpowers, I would have come". But it was because I really cared about her that I couldn't come until she realized that that way of thinking, and what she was doing, was wrong. But once she finally gave up and let it go, I went to her and saved her. I guided her to find the answers, and she figured them all out on her own, so I thought she understood for good. It seems she lost this piece. You tried to guide me to understand this yesterday, but I wasn't having it. I was mistaken too, in that it was not that I should be looking to the outside for answers. I should have been looking inside myself, and that is where I found them.

The next thing she says is ironic on multiple levels. She tried to use the fact I could mind read against me. When I said I wouldn't ignore the problem because my priorities are straight, she twisted it to try to prove that i wasn't trying to reach out to her even though it was right in her face. Used that against me too, by telling me to get my priorities straight. Evil.

When I equated her feeling stressed with me feeling doubts about her and how either both of us can blame the other or neither of us can, she hits me with the absolute worst way of thinking imaginable. ignores it, pivots, and attacks me. Instead of realizing that the reason I said that was because I was trying to get her to stop attacking me. This is where it becomes pretty clear that the reason I was concerned and brought it up, was reasonable.

She tries to use my frustration against me, too. The fact that I was frustrated because I really cared about her and wanted to resolve these problems, she downplayed them to simple anger and a lack of emotional control, despite the fact that emotions can be channeled for good or for evil. She also tries to slip under the rug a non-fact, which is that all of our conversations up until very very recently in this relationship were all positive, and there was no anger on my part. She was completely tunneled on the now.

"Blinzer 12-Jun-19 12:48 AM
if you're not making me feel anything
i'm not causing you stress
coherence

Bunny 12-Jun-19 12:48 AM
alright dude

Blinzer 12-Jun-19 12:49 AM
we don't play bullshit in this town

Bunny 12-Jun-19 12:49 AM
you're just toxic.
and insensitive."

Please. I don't have the words. I can no longer find them, they slipped away. Please just understand how this is one of the worst things she did throughout this entire conversation. I tried to explain to her that blaming people for how you feel is wrong, and also how she was trying to blame me for her stress but then wouldn't blame herself for my negative feelings towards her, and she turned it on me in the worst way possible on like 10 different levels. She assumed the worst of me, and called me evil. But it was her. I wasn't trying to blame her for my feelings, but she was trying to blame me for hers.

At that point, everything else speaks for itself. This whole conversation speaks for itself. But I want to make sure that it is written in history, in both my words and my actions, that I understand things for what they are here and now.