I need some air so I'm writing

Just finished trying to register for another class since I failed the one last semester. Only option is a grad level (no surprise, a total of 11 undergrad courses count for Comp E tech elective credit here, ignoring all other requirements) that I heard about from one of the strangest professors i have ever had because hes the one teaching it. Had a friend who took it who said its brutal but you are basically ensured to pass as long as you try, which was my experience with this prof as well, so to hell with it, I need something like that and it fits in my schedule (one of three classes that meet my grad requirements and does). The other two options I had were the class i failed again, with a new professor (the professor was not the issue with that class, i was) or be waitlisted for a class that sounded similar to the one i failed.

Now. Turns out this class requires special permission to sign up for. I emailed my advisor asking about it but god DAMN i just want to be done with it. Terrified I'll hear back that I cant take it for some reason and have my only legitimate option left be to retake the class I failed.

Classes start on the 15th apparently, so I need this sorted. May 9th is the finish line.

Honestly I got stressed out enough just trying to figure out what i can do to still graduate this coming semester. I really wonder what happened, used to not get this way about practically anything. Even applying for college, I just applied to the U of M and said w/e. Kinda wish I could feel like that ever again.

Besides that Im supposed to be applying for jobs like im actually going to graduate. My brother went out of his way to send me a thing for talent acquisition at his job and i havent dealt with it yet, resume hasnt been updated since i looked for work last summer, and even then it was pretty barren, and whatever other nonsense i dont have the foresight or energy to know about.

Still working on mending a friendship i messed up this past year too. Its in a weird place and i still dont know what to think but we talked about hanging out again for the first time in forever so maybe itll be ok. They go to school in a different state and i always talked about going to visit them, i hadnt yet before we fell apart and they asked recently if i would still be interested, so heres hoping something works out there. Between how insane their school year is and my busier than usual schedule, itll be a miracle if something works out but i really want to try and make it happen. The whole reason we fell apart was because they felt like i didnt put effort in to our friendship so...

Sister is talking about moving to Georgia, actually flew down there again yesterday or the day before for some form of test for a potential job. Seems like she really wants to be down there so I hope it goes well for her, but damn if it doesnt make me feel a lot of things, namely lonely and afraid. Iv gotten along with her well for a really long time at this point so id be pretty sad to not have her around as much. Other than that her willingness to just move to the other end of the country is just wild to me, I cant imagine so much as thinking something like that right now. Maybe its just because of my circumstances and the opportunity isnt there.

I can breathe again so im done