Psychotic Anon in Equestria 4

>You stand there, in the middle of the streets, staring at Derpy Hooves. You can’t believe you what she just said to you. She asked you again.
>’There are humans there, right?’
‘Ummm….’
M:Dude, say something.
>’He’s right, you should.’
‘Oh….fuck.’
>You look at them and shrug. You don’t know how to take this. You are insane and now a p0ny you just met has admitted to at least hearing them.
‘Okay, this is strange. How many fingers are they holding up?’
>You wiggle your fingers at her.
>’Well the girl is holding up 3 while the guy is holding up one in the middle of his hoof.’
>Alice clocks Mark in the face.
>Derpy starts to giggle, and you face palm.
‘So you can see them too?’
>’Yep yep yep. Can’t everyp0ny?’
‘No…they are inside my head. For 3 years, it was only me that could see them.’
>’What do you think it means?’
‘Dunno, maybe that I’m late for work on the first day.’
>You start walking again, and Derpy follows.
>’Do they have names?’
‘Ask them. They can hear you.’
A:I’m Alice and that’s my brother Mark.
M:*hurumph*
>’Nice to meet you.’
‘Derpy, I think this would be something not to tell others about you able to see them.’
>’Oh…I understand…’
>You stop and look at her. You can’t help but feel sorry for this p0ny, especially with Alice whispering it in your ear.
‘Derpy, only a few p0nies know about me, fewer know what Alice and Mark looks like. I…I just don’t want you to end up as an experiment because of me. ‘
>you feel something nudge your hand, and you look down. Derpy is bonking her head into your left hand.
>’You’re a good friend.’
>you smile. Another day, another friend. Maybe someone who can understand how you feel.
‘Do friends get more muffins?’
>’Yep yep yep.’
>You scruff up her mane, and start walking again.
>Eventually you both find yourselves outside a large purple circus tent looking building.
>’This is her shop. Can you give her the mail for me? She makes me wear stuff…’
‘It’s okay. Maybe after work, you wouldn’t mind showing me around town. I still don’t know where anything is.’
>’Okie Dokie.’
>She passes you a few envelopes from her bag using her wing.
‘See ya later Derpy.’
>You walk inside, and come face to face with Rarity, who was floating mid air.
>’And what time do you call this?’
>HELP ME ALICE!
M:She’s outside looking at the fluffy p0nies.
>Fuck…
‘I’m sorry Mademoiselle Rarity, I had an encounter with a p0ny who doubted you were the greatest fashonista in P0nyville. I argued that if they weren’t dressed so tacky, I would offer them to come browse your wares. Seeing as they were, others may have thought you allowed them to dress like that .’
>Her eyes begin to water and she gives you a hug.
>’Anon, you did that for me?’
‘Rarity, you are my boss. I would never lie to you.’
M: Smooth.
>she floats down and directs your attention to a small desk with a phone and a few quills and parchment.
>’Well, this is where you will be stationed. You will answer phones and take orders. If something gets too complicated call for me, but I assume you are smart enough to learn on the job.’
>You sit down at the small desk, on a small chair that took your weight.
‘Thank you Rarity.’
>’I also got a few things for you to do in your free time.’
>She ran out the back and comes back with 5 large blocks of wood and a few chisels.
>’I know a few p0nies that owe me favours, and was able to procure some materials. I wanted to know if you wanted to carve me a small statue for decoration. I would be willing to pay extra for the work.’
‘No need Mademoiselle. If you can supply me the wood, I will make you one. I think I have an idea for the first one.’
>’Very good Anon. If you need any help, I’ll be out the back.’
>She walks out the back, and you place her mail on the desk. She doesn’t need to know she has mail yet. You grab one of the blocks and start carving.
A:It wasn’t nice to lie to her.
>It’s not nice to blame your friends, you retort.
>Stroke after stroke, you whittle away at the wood, making the basic shape.
>After a few hours work, you finish the first one. It’s a beautiful statuette of Celestia and Luna standing together. You clean off the desk of all the wood shavings when the phone rings.
‘Hello, Carousel Boutique. Anon speaking.’
>’Hmm…that’s a weird name. Are you new’ came a stuck up male voice.
‘Yes sir. I am Mademoiselle Rarity’s new assistant and artist. What can I do for you?’
>The gentlecolt orders a few new suits and some dresses, and you write down his measurements as he says them. He says they will need to be ready in a fortnight.
>After hanging up the phone, Rarity walks out to check the new order, and her eyes fall onto the new carving you have placed on the desk.
>’Oh my word Anon. That looks simply marvellous. Such detail in the work, you are a true artist.
‘It’s nothing special.’ You blush ‘Oh, before I forget.’
>you pass her the order sheet and her mail.
‘Sharp Fit just ordered and your mail came in.’
>’Oh Derpy was around. I hope she wasn’t a bother.’
>You can feel Mark’s fingers digging into your brain.
‘No, she was quite nice. I believe if p0nies just spoke to her, they would see her for who she is, not how she looks.’
>’Oh Anon. I didn’t mean anything like that. She is always friendly, I just worried she was going to distract you from your wonderful work.’
>you start to feel bad, jumping to conclusions.
‘No, she actually made me feel calm.’
>’well, would you mind running into town to fetch lunch for me. A daisy and rose petal on pumpernickel.’
>She floats over a small bag of coins.
>’And something for yourself as well.’
>you walk out the door and towards town.
>After going to the small café and getting Rarity’s sandwich and a salad for yourself, you swing past Twilight’s to grab some medication.
M:Spoil sport
A:No more…..fluffy?
>You walk back to Carousel Boutique when you hear a fluttering sound. You turn to see Derpy following you.
‘Stalker.’
>’monkey’
‘I has a present for you. Follow me.’
>you both walk to the shop and you duck inside.
>You walk back out with your hands behind your back. You pull out a carving you made. It was a large muffin that had a pair of eyes on them. The eyes looked like Derpy’s.
‘I made this in my free time. It’s for you.’
>Derpy looked at the muffin, and then back to you, and then at the muffin AND you.
>’But why?’
‘I don’t know. I just made it cos I thought you would like it.’
>She gives you a hug, which makes you feel weirder. You never really got into the whole hug thing, but you allow it.
>’Thank you Anon.’
‘No worries. I need to get back to work. I’ll see you later Derpy.’
>You walk back inside and call out for Rarity. You hand her sandwich and sit down to get back to work. She looks at you with wonder.
‘Mmmyes?’
>’I’m sorry. You just seem sad.’
‘Not really. I tried to commit suicide, so I obviously was playing on not seeing my family again. I already transferred all my belongings to my family. I was prepared for all this.’
>’So, you are happier being alone?’
‘I spent my final year on earth alone. No friends, my family was too happy. I didn’t want to bother them. My letter said I loved them all and I wish them the best for their lives.’
>She looks like she is about to break down crying.
‘Not to say I’m not having a great day in P0nyville. I seem to be settling in here better than I was on earth. I just have to decide at the end of the research if I want to stay.’
>’Well I do hope you stay. I enjoy having you work for me.’
>Rarity walks out the back to eat her lunch. You smile. It’s nice to feel wanted for once in your life.
> You are interrupted by the door opening and two very elegant p0nies walk inside. One had a blue coat with a pink mane, and the other a pink coat with a blue mane.
>’Hello’ the pink one said. ‘Iz Rarity ‘ere?’
‘I’m sorry. Mademoiselle Rarity is unavailable. I am her assistant, Anon.’
>’Ahh, zee ‘uman, yes?’ The blue on said ‘I am Lotus and zis is my sizter Aloe. We are ‘ere to pick up our new outfitz.’
‘I shall go check on the progress.’
>You walk out the back of the shop to talk to Rarity.
‘Rarity, Aloe and Lotus are ‘ere to pick up zere new outfitz.’
>’ANON! Don’t let them catch you making fun of them.’
>You chuckle a bit. Rarity levitates over two dresses in plastic, matching the colour scheme of the p0nies.
>’It’s 120 bits. Make sure you let zem know zis.’
>she gives you a wink and you chuckle. You walk out the front and hand them the dresses.
>Aloe: ‘Excuse me. Who made zis exquisite statuette?’
‘Oh, that was me. Something I did in my free time.’
>Lotus: ‘Impossible, you made zis artwork?’
‘I…I wouldn’t really call it art. It’s something I made to calm my mind.’
>L: ‘Would you consider making us one for zee spa?’
‘I would need measurements and design ideas for a proper quote, but maybe. But the dresses will be 120 bits.’
>Aloe passes you a small bag, and gives you a wink.
>A:’Keep zee change, cutie.’
>They both walk out with a smile on their faces, and you decide to count out the coins. You find out they left you a 30 bit tip. You walk out the back and hand Rarity the 120 bits.
‘What do I do with tips?’
>’If you want to keep them, you can.’
‘Wow, 30 bit tips.’
>’30 BITS!! You can’t be serious, Anon?’
‘No, that’s what she gave me. Called me cutie too.’
>’I hope you remember your boss who took you in.’
‘Oh about that, they want me to carve statues for them so I don’t need your job.’
>She looks upset and you start to laugh.
‘I’m sorry Rarity, that was too easy. Here, you can have half.’
>You pass Rarity half of the money you made in tips.
>’Oh Anon, I couldn’t.’
‘Consider it help to pay my wages.’
>’Did they really want you to do a statue?’
‘Yeah, but I said I could only do it in my free time.’
>’You are too sweet Anon.’
‘You’re just lucky I’m crazy enough to stay here.’
>You spend the rest of the day carving another statue for home until Rarity says you can leave. She pays you 50 bits for the day’s work, which you think is nice, but you don’t know really. When you walk outside to find Derpy waiting for you.
‘Were you waiting all day for me?’
>’No. I had work too.’
A:Hehehe
>’See, Alice gets it.’
‘So where should we start?’
>Derpy shows you every part of P0nyville, including Sweet Apple Acres and the town office as well as where she lives with her friend Golden Harvest. It is such a nice sunset out, you actually don’t mind your statue poking you in the ass.
‘Thank you for showing me around town Derpy. It was wonderful.’
>’It’s nothing Anony. I liked the company. See you tomorrow?’
‘Of course.’
>You walk inside Twilight’s library to see her waiting for you.
M:Twice in one day. That p0ny is  getting you in trouble.
>’I heard that’ you hear from outside.
>’Where have you been?’ Twilight says
‘I’m sorry. I needed to take a walk. Why?’
>’I was worried. The princess entrusted me with the safety of you and….what is that?
*OPEN PIC NOW*
‘I made this at work. It’s an animal from my home country. It’s called an echidna.’
>’It looks so real.’
‘Well I made a statue for Rarity, and have been asked for one from the two spa p0nies. P0nies seem to like them.’
>’Well, we should get you some dinner, and we can talk.’
>Spike walks down the stairs and sees the echidna statue sitting on the table.
>S:’ What’s that?’
‘That’s my pet echidna, Scrumpy.’
>Twilight makes you a vegetarian lasagne and you sit down and relax.
>’So, where did you live?’
‘On Earth, I lived on a small continent called Australia. Filled with the most dangerous creatures in the world. I had friends in other countries who thought I was immortal. Seems that I am.’
>’Are there other creatures like this where you live?’
‘Yeah. The closest relative had a pouch, and looked like someone took random body parts and slapped them together. It had a ducks bill, a beavers tail, the males had a venomous barb and was covered in fur. Both of these creatures laid eggs like reptiles and birds, that hatched and drank milk like mammals.’
>Twilight was gobsmacked.
‘I’m serious about this. Kangaroos, possums, wombats; they were all found in Australia. It was the smallest continent and the largest island. It was paradise.’
>You start to feel homesick, but realise how bad you were treated there.
>’So…about the human anatomy?’
‘Yeah…no!’
>’Okay. I should contact the princess with my findings so far.’
‘Can you ask the princess if she is willing to help me build a house here? I hate to impose on you’
>’Of course.’
‘I’m going to sleep now. I’m pooped. Night Twi, Night Spike.’
>’Night Anon. Sleep well.’
>Spike gives you a bro claw and you fall to the mattress Twilight made for you.
>You fall asleep with a smile on your face.