Simurgh hallucination 4

"Cody," Krouse had to bite his tongue to keep from saying something he shouldn't. "I'm pretty badly hurt, here. If we have to talk about this stuff, can we at least do it while walking back?"

"Because the Simurgh's been replying old memories for me, and the irritating thing is they aren't my most painful memories."

Cody wasn't listening. Krouse walked past him, and Cody turned to follow, talking to him from behind. "Not the time my mom had my cat put down, when they definitely could have saved him. No, every time she brings some memory to the surface, it's you."

Krouse paused mid-step, then forced himself to keep walking.

"Isn't that a pisser? I get some lunatic alien bird thing speaking in my head, and all she wants to do is make me remember the times you irritated me. The little pranks you pulled, like getting to the clubroom early and fucking with my computer before a game."

******



"Pisses me off that nobody else sees it. Pisses me off that you don't get that I see it. The smug smiles when you get one over on me, the condescending look you gave me when you first walked into the club, holding Noelle's hand."

"Cody-"

"That's the shit the Simurgh keeps showing me. Any time I close my eyes, any time I stop for a freaking second, I get it rubbed in my face."

"She's doing it on purpose," Krouse said. "Either it's just automatically bringing up the issues that are closest to the surface, or she's doing it because she thinks reminding you of that stuff is going to do more damage in the long run than reminding you of your cat. You play into her hands if you let it get to you. You let her win."

"Funny thing is," Cody said, "I'd rather see her win than see you come out the hero, here."

- Migration 17.5