Advertisement
Not a member of Pastebin yet?
Sign Up,
it unlocks many cool features!
- Author: StrangeCreed
- >fluffy pony is playing with one of the old baby toys you bought for her
- >she burbles happily, but is stumped with trying to fit a square peg into the triangle hole
- >it seems apropos as you grease up
- >you crawl over to fluffy pony, erection swinging between your legs
- >without a word you flip fluffy pony over
- >"Wah! Pway new game?"
- >you lower yourself, rubbing your savagely pulsing erection against her soft belly
- >fluffy pony is still giggling and thinking its just a belly rub
- >you grab the fluff of her head roughly and began grinding harder
- >"Owchies! No puh! No puh!"
- >you're getting closer, and you tell fluffy pony to open her mouth for a 'special treat'
- >door opens
- >roommate and his girlfriend walk in
- >after a moment of shock they start laughing hysterically
- >you start crying, but blow your load into fluffy pony's waiting mouth
- >why do you smell tomato sauce
- >spaghetti shot from your urethra!
- >fluffy pony squeals in joy and latches onto your dick, sucking like a tiny vacuum cleaner
- >roommate and whore laughing
- >you ejaculate again while fluffy pony chokes out "wuv skapetties" through a mouthful of sauce-caked cock
- >diarrhea starts, the force of which propels you out the window, flying like an out of control model rocket exposing your shame to the entire apartment complex
- >crash and die
- >fluffy pony finds better owner, still tries to fellate for more spaghetti
- >you adopted a fluffy pony recently but her behavior has been troubling
- >she plays loves all the things a fluffy pony should
- >however, every time she climbs into your lap she tries to unzip your fly while babbling about spaghetti
- >this troubles you and you're hell-bent on finding out why
- >after a week long investigation, you discover that she was the fluffy pony of a dangerous pastamancer
- >also, apparently he was discovered forcing his fluffy pony to give fellatio
- >as you are lost in thought, your fluffy pony waddles across the couch and into your lap
- >"fwuffy hungy"
- >you try not to feed her only spaghetti
- >you're no expert, but that diet is clearly part of the reason fluffy ponies don't live very long
- >"wan spesha sketties!"
- >you shove her off of your crotch
- >undeterred, her supple hooves try to clumsily unzip your pants
- >pick up fluffy by scruff, still wiggling to get at your junk
- [fluffy pony], I do not shoot spaghetti out of my penis
- >"fwuffy dun' care! spesha huggies an' den skaskeghies!"
- >suddenly, a torrent of piping hot noodles flows out of fluffy pony's mouth
- >it forms a terrible effigy of a man in squirming, serpentine pasta
- >"I. LIVE. AGAIN."
- >you are now confronted with Spaghetti That Walks
- >the dread pastamancer casts Ray of Pesto, and you barely succeed your reflex save
- How very clever! Using a fluffy pony as a vessel for your unholy noodle apotheosis! Have you no shame?!
- >you draw you +2 Sorry Stick of Disrupting
- >fluffy pony is stunned, and takes no action
- >the Spaghetti That Walks utilizes its Improved Grab to slam, then pull you into a grapple, but your high CMD prevents it from using engulf
- >with a mighty swing from your sorry stick, you smash the pastamancer, forcing it to discorporate
- >among the remains you find a Helm of Retard Protection, Knee-pads of Allure, and an Unnatural Axe
- >fluffy pony has drowned
- >you look into your neckbeard GM's face
- What the shit, you didn't even roll a Fort save for my familiar!
- >he snerks "Hey, you wanted a fluffy pony as a familiar, you should have seen this coming."
- >his group of toadies nods in agreement
- Fine, do I at least level up?
- >"you are now... a third level paladin."
- >you begin editing your sheet
- >seriously, Pathfinder with fluffy ponies
- >weirdest game ever
Advertisement
Add Comment
Please, Sign In to add comment
Advertisement