Season 1 copypasta by Anonymous

"Thanks again for saving me, guys!" Bubblegum said as Finn and Jake brought her back to the Candy Kingdom. "I guess that Ice King will never learn that he can't have me as long as you guys are around, will he?" "Nah, he's pretty stupid," said Finn. "He probably has ice for brains." Bubblegum laughed. It was a stupid joke, but it was cute nonetheless. 'Well, I gotta get back to the Kingdom. See ya guys around!" she said. She then gave Finn a quick kiss on the cheek and giggled warmly at the two of them before heading on her way. Finn blushed slightly at the thought of what just happened and smiled warmly to himself. "Oooooh, looks like SOMEONE'S in love" Jake snickered noticing Finn's countenance. "Dude, shut up!" Finn snapped, his already red face growing even more so. "I don't LOVE her, I just LIKE her. You know, as a friend." "Yeaaaah, of course ya do, buddy," Jake said with a smirk, "of course ya do." "Jake, just drop it, OK? I told you I don't have a thing for her." Finn hopped up on his friend's back in a huff, eager to get back to the treehouse and let the subject dissipate.

"Yeah, you're right. You don't have a THING for her, you have a CRUSH on her instead!" "Come on man, stop it. I don't love her. Besides she's not even my type!" Jake started off on a run to their treehouse. "Well what IS your type then?" "Well...I...I dunno, I've never really thought about that type of stuff. Too busy fighting evil with you." "What?! Man, you GOTTA put some thought into getting a girl." "But I'm only twelve." "Never too early to start thinking." "Eh, I'll have plenty of time to think about that sort of stuff when I get older. For now, all I wanna do is just go on adventures with you." "Eh, suit yourself. More fish in the sea for me then."

The duo arrived at their treehouse, and Finn jumped off of his friend's back and opened the front door. "What's the big deal with getting a girlfriend anyway?" he said as he walked in. "If you ask me, it's pretty overrated." "What're you talkin' about, dude? Having a girlfriend's pretty awesome!" Jake replied. "Nah, all they do is have you buy stuff for them and then complain whenever you don't pay attention to them. And they always want to do stupid stuff like talk about their feelings with you, watch romance movies and get all lovey-dovey. Not that I hate girls and all, but that's not the life for me, I wanna be free and do whatever I want." "So? At least it's better than being single." "How would you know? You don't have a girlfriend." "Yeah I do. Me and Rainicorn have been going steady for a while." Finn suddenly stopped in his tracks at this. "Oh...r-really?" "Yeah, first we were just casual friends, but now we're an item. Heh, one more step and I bet we'll be a full fledged couple," Jake said, grinning widely at the thought of this. "Hey, uh, that's...well, that's pretty cool dude,"Finn said, feigning happiness for his best friend.

"Yeah, is it ever," Jake said not noticing his friend's melancholy tone. "Oh crap!" He suddenly perked up. "That reminds me, I gotta get ready for our date tonight!" "What? You guys are dating already?" Finn asked, his voice faltering even more. "Uh-huh, me and her are goin' out tonight. We were thinking of getting a bite to eat and then going to Marceline's rock concert." "Oh, that's nice." Finn dejectedly took a seat on a sofa as his friend started gloating about the great time he'd be having tonight. "And then, if we're lucky," Jake gushed, "we might even get to third base." He chuckled, unable to contain his excitement. "Hoo boy, this night's definitely gonna be one to remember!" As Jake turned to a mirror to groom himself, he noticed Finn looking sadly at the floor. "Hey uh...Finn, is something wrong?" "Nah, it's nothing." Jake walked over to the obviously crestfallen Finn and took a seat next to him on the sofa. "Dude, I'm your friend. If something's up, just tell me." "Nah, I-I'm fine, really," Finn persisted. "I'm just- I'm just a bit tired from fighting Ice King today, that's all." "You sure?" "Yeah, I'm good." Of course, although he didn't admit this to Finn's face, Jake wasn't really convinced by his friend's excuse; he'd known Finn long enough to know when he was upset about something, and if this wasn't one of those times, he didn't know what was.

"Cool. Well I'd better get going." Jake started towards the door. "The concert starts in about 2 hours and we wanna get the best seats in the house." "Hey, you two have a good time tonight, alright?" Finn said, "Definitely." "Great, see you when you get back." "Alright, catch ya later buddy!" And with that, Jake left for his night out. Finn walked slowly over to the window beside the door and put his face up against it, watching his friend grow bigger and then run off into the distance. When Jake had finally faded from vision, Finn turned away, sighed and sadly trudged back to the couch and laid down on it. He leaned over to the end table next to him, picked up a framed picture of his best friend that was propped up on a table and looked at it, his sad frown becoming even more contorted the longer he looked at Jake's beaming face.

"Why?" he said softly to himself. "Why did you go out with Rainicorn? Why don't you realize I'M the one who loves you, not her!" He took the picture to his chest and hugged it tenderly as if he were actually hugging his friend. Friend...no. No, Jake wasn't a friend to him. Not at this point in the game. Finn had known Jake far too long for him to simply be just a "friend". To Finn, Jake was like a part of him, something that was cherished and lusted after, something that was...loved. No, Finn didn't like Jake at all. He loved him. He wanted him more than anything he could imagine. "Why?" Finn looked again at the picture, his vision blurring as his eyes filled with tears. "Why?" He blinked, letting his tears fall on his best friend's image, and he tried with all his might to choke back a sob. "Why, dammit? WHY?!" Finn screamed the last word in a passion filled rage, letting the word escape him with all his strength. His attempts at repressing his sobs failed, as he slowly let his body shake with them as he hugged the picture again. He let himself sink further down into the couch, slowly becoming a weeping mess as he did. "Why?" he whispered to himself as his tears flowed into his mouth, filling it with salty bitterness. As he let himself drift off to sleep in his depressed exhaustion, his thoughts flashed to Jake on his date with Rainicorn, and he let out one last sob before going into slumber.