Fucking AiE is Productive as Hell: the AiE Short

Fucking AiE is Productive as Hell: the AiE Short

I always come home after work and have to catch up with like 600+ AiE posts.  In the spirit of this, here's a little AiE.

>you've been in Equestria for a few weeks
>honestly, you don't know if you should be surprised or not
>it's just like the show
>p0nies p0ne p0ne, they don't swear, they don't seem to have reproductive organs
>they're amazingly helpful even if you're a weird bipedal omnivore
>you can't really seem to figure out how they defecate or urinate, but you haven't asked too many "personal" questions however
>you don't want to offend them
>you do your best to make yourself useful; something you haven't done when you were on Earth
>you aren't bored, but there's something missing
>you've asked Twilight to help you
"Anon! I've figured out how to solve this problem of yours" she called
>as she gallops towards you, you can't help your hopes from rocketing straight through the almost nonexistent clouds
>Rainbow Dash has made her run just this afternoon
"Come on, I've worked it out in the library" she says
>you follow her
"So, you think it'll work?" you ask
>she nods, seemingly confident
"Just sit here and write down your question. I've taken care of everything" she says
>you're shaking with excitement and anticipation
>you start writing
>there's a little flash and a scroll appears, listing threads and posts
>it works!
>Twilight is a genius, you'll be able to read up on what you've been missing for this much time
>you write down "AiE threads in the past two weeks"
---
>you are Rainbow and you're at a funeral
>you hold a newspaper
>the headline reads
"Two killed in freak magical scroll avalanche accident: the contents still baffle and disgust Equestrian investigators"

AiE End.