A Very Stupid Team

Eevee @ Eevium Z
Ability: Adaptability
Level: 50
EVs: 252 HP / 4 Def / 252 Spe
Jolly Nature
- Last Resort
- Baton Pass
- Protect
- Stored Power

I am fully aware of how stupid this is. I just don't care. Eevee is what makes this team function (if you can call it "functioning"), and exists only to click Extreme Evoboost and then Baton Pass. Protect and Stored Power are mostly on there for lack of better moves.  I mean, I guess Protect could be useful if you suspect they're going to click Pursuit...? Does anyone even run that? And I guess Stored Power might snag a surprise...something. The EVs let it take a Xurkitree Discharge before it boosts, as I've learned by experience; so long as it doesn't get paralyzed, it can then always get off a Baton Pass before most other things. I'm just grateful there aren't any Fighting-type spread moves.

Clefable @ Sitrus Berry
Ability: Unaware
Level: 50
EVs: 252 HP / 4 Def / 252 SpD
Calm Nature
IVs: 0 Atk
- Follow Me
- Moonblast
- Thunder Wave
- Protect

My second lead, comes out next to Eevee. Clefable has great bulk, especially with a Sitrus to heal a little between hits; there isn't enough passive damage in VGC to make it worth running Magic Guard, but Unaware is well worth it, given all the UBs with Beast Boost. Follow Me is the thing that makes this Pokemon shine (it's also the only Pokemon with any kind of bulk capable of running it, so of course I'm going to use it); it's practically a necessity, given that Eevee has all the bulk of wet tissue paper and we can't have it dying before it can successfully get off its boosts. T-Wave is...meh, I don't know about using it at all. Protect is basically filler, and Moonblast is to make sure that even if it gets Taunted it can still be useful.

Tapu Lele @ Life Orb
Ability: Psychic Surge
Level: 50
EVs: 252 SpA / 4 SpD / 252 Spe
Timid Nature
IVs: 0 Atk
- Dazzling Gleam
- Psychic
- Thunderbolt
- Hidden Power Fire

The sweeper. Core of the team, monstrously powerful, etc., etc. Dazzling Gleam is the order of the day; I'd run Tapu Fini to use it better (Misty Terrain), but Lele has the higher SpA, so Lele it is. Plus, Lele's Psychic in Psychic Terrain hits like a truck. HP Fire makes Kartana run home crying for its mommy, and can put some serious hurt on Celesteela too. I'm not entirely sure what Thunderbolt is for, possibly Pelipper, but I'm sure it's useful...although I've been debating throwing Shadow Ball on there to deal with Oranguru.

Oranguru @ Mental Herb
Ability: Telepathy
Level: 50
EVs: 252 HP / 252 SpD / 4 Spe
Calm Nature
IVs: 0 Atk
- Protect
- Taunt
- Instruct
- Foul Play

My support Pokemon of choice. Mental Herb allows it to eat a single Taunt and return the favor, preventing it from getting Taunted again and letting Lele do the sweeping up. Instruct assists Lele in sweeping, letting it get 100% more Dazzling Gleam per Dazzling Gleam. Or just letting it use Psychic on both targets, depends on the situation. Protect is basically filler, especially because most foes will be focusing fire on Lele, but I guess it can be useful. Foul Play is, again, filler; however, if you failed to take out an Alolawak for some reason, then it can be invaluable for dealing with it. Or with a number of other physical attackers.

Marowak-Alola @ Thick Club
Ability: Lightning Rod
Level: 50
EVs: 140 HP / 252 Atk / 116 Spe
Adamant Nature
- Bonemerang
- Shadow Bone
- Flare Blitz
- Protect

This guy is basically a backup for Tapu Lele. If the enemy team is running a fuckload of Steel or Poison types, or is mostly specially defensive, or just has a comp that Tapu Lele would do poorly against, this is my answer. A Thick Club-holding Alolawak at +2 Atk and Speed hits like a freight train, and the only reasons I don't use it instead of Lele as my main sweeper are because it's slower even at +2 (although it does get up to 160, which is reasonably fast compared to most of the meta), because it can't hit the entire field, and because it's vulnerable to priority - Sucker Punch can be NASTY. Flare Blitz can sting to use, but the main STAB is Shadow Bone anyway.

Mandibuzz @ Leftovers
Ability: Overcoat
Level: 50
EVs: 156 HP / 100 Def / 120 SpD / 132 Spe
- Foul Play
- Protect
- Taunt
- Knock Off

This Pokemon, as a whole, is mostly filler. Unless they're running powerful physical attackers, in which case it can be quite handy. Foul Play is the damage-dealing move of choice, especially since it requires no attack investment on my part. Protect is just always useful, especially against Xurkitree's Discharge. Taunt shuts down Oranguru HARD, as well as a number of other defensive Pokemon. Knock Off is just there for removing Celesteela's Leftovers/Alolawak's Thick Club/etc and making them a bit more killable. I debated using Whirlwind instead of Knock Off to blow away Celesteela's Substitutes or any other setup Pokemon's boosts, but let's roll with this and see how it goes.