Question 1:
	I am interested in becoming an LCSW in order to treat patients in a one on one therapeutic setting. I recently opted out of a premed, post-bac program because I decided that contrary to my previous belief, I don’t actually want to be a psychiatric nurse. I prefer talking to and listening to people, helping them parse through their thoughts and come up with coping mechanisms and concrete strategies. I have been contemplating the helping professions since I was in college and my alternate plan was to get a PhD in psychology and become a practicing psychologist. However, I think I can accomplish more in the world in terms of policy and local programming with a degree in social work, which offers a more flexible path. I have studied a fair amount of psychology, but most of my knowledge comes from self-teaching. I have been managing my own mental illness for the last 20 years and I have picked up lots of information along the way both via experience and extensive reading. Additionally, I run a small non-profit that operates a 24/7 Discord chatroom (Discord is kind of like Skype but with an emphasis on text and more functionality), which offers mental health peer support. I opened the server in July of 2017 and have been working on it daily since then. We are at roughly 4500 members, with several hundred active at any given time. The core of the server is volunteer supporting. We rely entirely on the help of unpaid supports who are willing to volunteer their time and energy to talking to other people who are having issues. I am adamant that this service remain peer based, because I feel as though the camaraderie established by common experiences, in this case the trials of mental illness, opens up the door for more meaningful connection and validation. This is especially true when there is a lack of support in a persons’s real life. In many cases we are the only emotional support people have, and even though I know that is insufficient I feel that it is better than nothing at all. I personally intervene in crisis situations that arise on the server, particularly with suicidal users. It operates very much like a suicide hotline in that we talk with our users and try to establish if they are in danger and if so whether or not we can get them extra help. Not all support is crisis based though. I spend a lot of time simply talking to people about what is bothering them, and if possible I help lessen their agitation. I teach my volunteers to question, listen, and validate: the cornerstones of peer support. As a social worker I hope to employ the skills I have learned through my chat and also to make a difference in the shoddy world of mental healthcare, which seems to be a worldwide issue.

Question 2:
	I find helping others very rewarding. I like to work to help improve peoples’ lives in whatever way I can. I often take on leadership positions so that I have the power and ability to make changes. Even something as simple as stage managing taught me how to interact with people who were stressed out, how to manage interpersonal conflict, and how to keep a cool head in heated or frustrating situations. I am very committed to seeking fair and equal treatment, and have always believed in the primacy of justice as a concept. In my work in my non-profit, The Haven, I strive to create a just and fair environment, often offering second chances and flexible punishments for people who cross the line. It is extremely important to me that everyone has a fair shot at accessing help, and sometimes we are the only service available to people. Thus we have to be extremely patient with people and allow for mistakes. My moderators appreciate my patience, which I have learned along the way because I understand that people are very complicated, especially those of us with mental illness—who constitute the entire population of our chat. I think that people with mental illness are used to being degraded and judged by family, friends, and society at large. We have collectively absorbed the idea that we are broken or flawed. I have seen and experienced firsthand the horrific treatment that one can receive in psychiatric care. We are worth more than the neglect that society affords us, and I would personally love to be a part of the movement towards acceptance and proper care. I believe in speaking honestly and opening up to combat the stigma, which is why I am not afraid to tell my story. In fact I have published journals of mine from psychiatric hospital stays on a blog that I write about mental health. My theory is that the more people know and actually understand, the more they will be able to treat and care for people with mental illness in an appropriate and validating manner. If that requires me to tell my story, I am not shy to do so. I am often able to use my experience to connect with the people I am supporting in my chat. Sharing emotions and experiences with one another builds strong bonds and can help people to feel much less alone. I believe that I am able to do a satisfactory job at supporting others because I have said experience, and I have received a lot of positive feedback as well. Overall, I am passionate about treating human beings with care, kindness, and respect, because regardless of our past we are all deserving of such things.

Question 3:
	I am committed to changing the mental healthcare system. My non-profit’s long-term goal is to raise money to offer to qualified members of our community so that they can access timely private healthcare, when public healthcare (internationally) has failed or private care is inaccessible due to funding or lack of insurance. I believe that just as one can receive physical healthcare, so should one be able to receive mental healthcare. I would like to be instrumental in making some changes, if only on a local or small international level. In general we do not have proper response teams for mental health crises. We could benefit from the establishment of mental health hospitals and emergency rooms. Mental health urgent cares would reduce the number of mentally ill in regular emergency rooms, and maybe even reduce the need for admissions because problems could be dealt with earlier than they would be normally. I have spoken to so many people who needed to go to a hospital, either because they believed they might hurt themselves or they had actually overdosed, only to have the emergency room turn around and send them home after a few hours even though they were clearly in need of further care. A user in my chat has been actively suicidal for about six weeks, and within that time has overdosed thrice. She is also an incredibly active self harmer. But as she lives in England and is at the mercy of the NHS, there is very little that she can do beyond repeatedly hurt herself to get their attention, in her words. She has been briefly admitted for her overdoses, but is promptly released with very little followup. I offer this as an example of the lack of care many mentally ill receive. I find myself extremely privileged because I can afford private care (my insurance will not cover my therapist or my psychiatrist), and I am often unable to offer suggestions to people because they are so limited by finances. The ability to access mental healthcare should be a fundamental human right.
	I would also like to help reduce the stigma surrounding mental health and receiving care, whether by being vocal about my experiences or encouraging others to speak their truths. I like to tell the members of my chat that if they can educate one person by sharing their life story, that one person could change another, setting off a chain reaction, but it requires the bravery to take action and open oneself up to discrimination and degradation. For instance the issue of mental health and the military. Veterans are arguably one of the most devastated populations, with an absurd suicide rate. Talking about PTSD and other mental illnesses when you are in active service is so taboo that soldiers who ask their superiors for help if they become depressed are often told never to speak bout it again or risk being discharged. I have spoken to many veterans who simply will not disclose their illnesses and thus cannot receive proper treatment. Being shamed for things outside of one’s control is completely unfair and unjust. Veterans need far more services than they are currently afforded, and if I could help increase the availability of help for that population I would be very happy. In the meantime we must work with society to help it understand that mental illness is not a character flaw, one story at a time.

Question 4:
	When I’m working on my chat server, volunteering time to supporting people, I frequently encounter mildly suicidal people and actively suicidal people. One recent situation involved a depressed user who was becoming increasingly suicidal. My only recourse is speaking through text and the chat is entirely anonymous so I cannot call emergency services on their behalf. I tried to ask him what was going on and why he felt this had come on all of a sudden. I evaluated whether or not he had a time picked out, means, and serious intent. He had all three. I urged him to call emergency services (he is in the Netherlands) to take him to a hospital but he refused and was unclear whether anyone would actually give him care anyway if he simply said he was suicidal. I tried to keep him engaged and distracted, suggesting that he think about thinks that anchored him to the world and the impact his loss would have if he did kill himself. These are stressful situations when they arise because there is so little that I can do from a distance, unless I have someone’s personal information. I have learned emotional boundaries to keep me professional and calm in these crises, a kind of clinical detachment. In this situation I was calm but concerned because he refused to contact anyone. He disappeared, saying forget about me. Not long after that he sent me a personal message apologizing for what he did, which of course confused me because he hadn’t done anything. Then he told me that he had taken roughly 150 Paracetamol tablets and had drank a half of a bottle of vodka. This switched me into overdrive and I explained what was going to happen to his body and how he was about to feel, along with consistently urging him to call emergency services. I demanded that he call. I told him that was the only choice. Eventually he began to type poorly and started to get scared, regretting how he felt and what he had done, at which point I was finally able to get him to contact a friend to take him to the hospital. The friend arrived shortly thereafter. The next day he messaged me to let me know that he was in the hospital and doing alright, though they were going to hold him for a while. He thanked me for talking to him and convincing him to get help. I was just grateful he was alive. Ultimately what I learn from these encounters is how to deal with them again, what strategies work and don’t work with those in immediate danger and how to get through to them in order to keep them safe.