The Tale of Kir (UNFINISHED)

BEGIN DAY 1
>be Kir
>it's just another normal day for you at [INSERT TOWN NAME], USA
>usually a normal day means that it's a dustbowl outside, but as of late it's been raining
>you're very thankful for this rain, as now your front lawn doesn't look like the sahara
>those flowers you picked up at Lowe's will finally be able to get planted this week
>but you digress
>the dustbowl had taught you the magic of occupying yourself indoors
>your first thoughts were initally to spend the day rubbing out as many as you can
>you treated it like a video game
>however when day three rolled around for FapFest, your body was screaming to stop
>you obliged, as you too couldn't take the pain any longer
>you instead found new shows to watch on television
>you had even ventured into the sports channels, landing on Fox Sports 1
*** THIS GREENTEXT STORY IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY FOX SPORTS 1; THE ONE. ***
>you could never watch sports for longer than 10 minutes, it never really struck a chord with you
>channel surfing and jogging around your house was how you spent your days, occasionally playing with your cats aswell
>today you found yourself crawling out of bed feeling a bit bitter about things
>who doesn't wake up grumpy?
>you shuffle over to your bathroom and give yourself a good look in the mirror
>rubbing your face and pushing your hair back, you look over yourself and deem your face acceptable
>not taking a shower was out of the question; keeping up with your health and hygiene is a big thing for you
>one relaxing shower later, you look to find that it's about 9 in the morning
>you still have plenty of time before any of your shows come on
>you trudge out of your bathroom and make way down the hallway to your living room
>you spot one of your cats playing with a scratching post
>the other is fast asleep on one of the arms of the couch
>you look over to your coffee table and spot your laptop
>you haven't actually used in in God-knows-when, and it's clearly showing
>some dust has gathered on the once prim and pristine black surface
"It's about time I clean this, right Dusty?"
>you motion towards your cat who is currently dead asleep on your couch
"..Uh, sure."
>you blow the dust off of your laptop and open it up
>you hear the cracks of plastic and chips of it even scatter around the room
"Fuck. It's been some time."
>you start up your laptop and venture over to your internet browser you used at the time, Netscape
>just kidding Netscape is fucking retarded you use Firefox
>nostalgia hits you like a strike of lightning as you go through your old bookmarks
"Wow, Mega Man Wiki? Bomberman FanZone? PornHub? Scratch?"
>wait, what was that last one?
>Pornhub
>no dumbfuck, the last one
"Wait, is that Scratch? Oh my god, there's no fucking way!"
>the hype was strong with you, and you decided to pay Scratch a much needed visit
>your heart started beating faster in anticipation for what awaited you on Scratch
>all you can remember is getting banned from their 2.0 site and finally calling it quits
>to be honest, after that, you had decided a break was in order, and it was the cause for your laptop being in the shape it was in
>your mind is spinning, meanwhile a loading bar still stuffs your screen waiting for Scratch to load
"Really? Scratch really went downhill."
>shit luck, eh? the site loaded immediatley after that outburst
>your browser was glittered with all sorts of colors on the Scratch homepage
>tits on a dick
>your eyes nearly exploded from the sheer disasterous color scheme of Scratch's new site
>the homepage read "Welcome to Scratch 6.6!"
"More like Scratch 6.66."
>god, aren't you the comedian of the year
>after your giggle fit, you start to hone in on the content that Scratch 6.6 was apparently "Excited and Proud" to deliever to your laptop screen
>"HeTeRo PrIdE MONTH", "STOP HATING ON BRONIES!!!", "waking light cc", "Add Your OC!"
>wow, nothing changed
>well, actually that was a lie
>the horrid quality of these projects would put the ones from the past to shame
>you feel a sudden urge to puke
>odd, you hadn't even had anything to eat this morning
>whatever was in your stomach was racing up to your mouth, and fast
>unable to take the sheer horror of Scratch 6.6, you proceed to let your vomit litter the laptop screen
>you can feel the rush of awful-tasting inners racing up and out of your body and flying across to the laptop
>after moments of unbearable torture brought to you by your gag-reflex, you take a cold hard look at what remained of your laptop
>one of your cats has started to eat the vomit
"That's gross. Get off, Dusty."
>you swat Dusty away from the laptop and start to gather cleaning supplies
>not only has Scratch previously made you give up the internet, but now it also makes you puke
>although on the upside, if you were anorexic, visiting the Scratch homepage was much easier than trying to stick your finger down your throat
>evaluating the mess you made, minus what Dusty had started eating, you decide you'll just throw away the laptop
>it's not like you needed it for anything up untill today
>with those great yellow gloves on, you clean up the mess and the laptop, and proceed to dump it all into someone else's garbage can
>there's no way you're letting that smell rot up around your house
>at this point you might as well take another shower
>another shower later prompts you to look at the clock that now reads "10:35"
"Alright, cool. I'll have something to eat."
>you walk down the hallway but now steer towards the kitchen
>your kitchen was decorated like one of a beautiful Italian stereotype
>but contrary to what your kitchen looked like, it was filled with piles of junk food
>you grab some Coco Puffs and mix them in with some Wheat Thins to spice up your breakfast experience
>strawberry milk was the next challenger for this breakfast debacle
>you put your meal on a tray and take it to your living room where you had just finished cleaning
>Dusty starts to beg for some of your concoction
"Fucking hell if you're getting any of this, Dusty."
>Dusty looks you in the eyes, almost in an understanding manner
>"Meow."
"DUSTY. NO."
>Dusty tilts her head and starts to meow at you with the velocity of a thousand suns
"DUSTY, STOP IT!"
>Dusty starts to race towards you, leaping off of the couch
"DUSTY, WHY DO YOU DO THIS?"
>you start to take some Coco Puffs and launch them at Dusty's cranium
>Dusty only increases in pace, and leads you to begin backing up
"DUSTY WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? YOU CRAZY BITCH!"
>you gingerly hop onto the kitchen sink, making sure not to drop your bowl of cereal
>you continue to hail mary Coco Puffs at Dusty
>Dusty begins to run over to you even faster, but haults once she reaches the sink
"HAH, CRAZY CUNT! TRY AND GET ME NOW!"
>Dusty swiftly jumps onto the sink with ease, and begins cuddling your legs
"Oh."
>you decide enough's enough and you eat your cereal on the sink, being sure to give Dusty some every now and again
>you continue eating your cereal with Dusty on the sink as you take in the sounds of the rain
>the patter on the windows is soothing, and even more so when one of said windows is behind you
>you take a look outside and see a low breeze gliding through your neighborhood
>you can't help but allow a warm smile to spread across your face
>moments of sweet bliss surround you and Dusty, and it feels like nothing could break you out of this trance
>a knock comes from the door
>what shitty luck you have today
"Alright, Dusty. The cereal's all yours. Have at it, girl."
>Dusty punds her face into the remnants of the cereal and eats away like a little child
>sometimes you swear Dusty was actually some poor girl's soul trapped in a cat's body
>it was quite cute how she acted, it was nothing like a cat at all
>the door knocks again, this time louder
"I'll be there in a minute, just hang on."
>you walk over to the door and see the silhouette of a very obese man
>you hear heavy breathing on the other side of the door
>well, hopefully the guy has an umbrella or something
>opening the door, you're greeted to a less than stellar representation of a human
>"Hi there, my name is Ben. I'm popular on YouTube as BenTheLooney."
>oh my god
>there's no way
>you knew you had recognized this poor fucker's face from somewhere
>it's all clear now
>hush hush, play it cool
>don't laugh
"Oh, cool. Hi, I'm TKB. Why are you at my door?"
>"You see, I've recently moved into your neighborhood, and I'm required my law to go door to door letting everyone know that I'm a sex offender."
>Jesus E. Christ.
>this day couldn't get any better
>you had BTL, one of the biggest faggots of all time, here at your door, covered in rain, telling you he's a sex offender
>best day of your life?

"Oh. Well, uh. Okay. Sorry..?"
>"No sir, it's quite alright. Please, take care, and follow me on Youtube."
"Faggot."
>"Wha-"
>you slam the door shut and walk back towards the sink to where Dusty has finished your cereal
"Wow, for a cat, you sure are a hungry little one."
>you gently pick up Dusty and put her back down onto the floor, but not before giving her some belly rubs
>speaking of cats, you wonder were your other cat, Sandwich, has run off too
>not to worry, the thing has probably fallen asleep ontop of the tv again
>for being a bachelor, this life was actually really good
>all you needed was another living thing in the house to make you cozy
>you prepare the bowl with some dishwashing soap as you turn on the faucet
>after a quick cleanup, it's back to the couch for you as you turn on the television to begin your daily ritual
>man, it sure was a busy morning
>you can throw it all to the past now, as the television warmly greets you with another episode of "OW, MY BALLS!"
"What the..? This again? Who keeps changing the channel?"
>Ow, My Balls! was on a network you never watched, and after a couple months worth of detective work, you either concluded some deranged person was breaking in and watching tv, or that your cable box just defaulted to this channel
>the show itself was horrible and not at all something you'd watch
>it was an hour-long show about a poor man's testicles being pounded into about anything concievable
>your cats, however, took a strong liking to this show
>you had never seen your cats so glued to a television screen in all of your life
>maybe... it was the cats?
>no, stop talking out of your ass.
>changing the channel, you began a routine that almost never broke pattern
>one of watching television, grabbing food, and doing some light exercise
>as much as the morning had been eventful, the later parts of the day delievered the complete opposite
>it was now dark outside, and your clock read "11:00"
"Wow. Time for bed already."
>you ready to leave your comfy posistion on the couch
>you gather up your things and head for your room
>after changing into some more comfy clothes, you ready up your bed
>but as you do, you hear a "meow" from beside you
"Dusty, what are you doing?"
>Dusty takes a leap onto your bed and makes herself comfy
"So you're too good for your cat bed, huh?"
>Dusty looks up at you before retiring to her own slumber
"Eh, what's the worst that could happen?"
>you take your spot on your bed and cuddle up against your faithful feline companion before drifitng off to sleep
>just any normal day
>and tomorrow probably won't change, either
END DAY 1

BEGIN DAY 2
>slowly you check back into reality
>you stare up at the ceiling in hopes of what will be a day not filled with the 'norm'
>you try to go back to sleep, but a burning sensation catches your side
>you look over and see something that completley sends you into shock
>you see long strands of brunette hair hiding underneath your blanket and arm
"Okay, what the fuck. I have to be dreaming."
>you rub your eyes and take another good look at what's accompanied you in your bed
>it's deifnitley some chick
>just how the fuck did she break in?
>you look around and notice that nothing has been tampered with in your room
>you bolt out of bed and run into the hallway looking for signs of someone breaking and entering
>not a thing
>you do see Sandwich sitting on the coffee table
"Sandwich, do you know what's going on?"
>Sandwich starts to lick his balls in response
"Why am I talking to a cat.."
>immediatley you turn your attention to another problem on your hands
>Dusty
>fuck no
>ain't no one gonna fuck with Dusty and get out of scott-free
>you run around the house searching for your little black cat
"DUSTY?!"
>you run into the bathroom
"DUSTY, WHERE ARE YOU?"
>your voice starts to quiver as with each room, there are no signs of Dusty
>who could have thought a cat meant this much?
"DUSTY! JUST COME OUT, PLEASE!"
>you drop to your knees as you make your way into the center of the hallway
>you fall over some bit, and Sandwich comes over to you in an attempt to ease the pain
>Sandwich then tries licking you
"No, Sandwich. Stop it."
>you push Sandwich away from you as you hear rustling from your room
>the girl
>maybe she, oh god
>maybe she killed Dusty?
>that fucking bitch
>you get up and head towards your kitchen and grab a knife
"This'll teach that cunt to fuck with my cats."
>you start to creep up on the bedroom door, knife in hand and all
>it sounds like she's getting up at this point
>you steady your knife-weilding arm, and peer over the doorframe
>you spot the brunette holding her head, now sitting upright on the side of the bed
>better time than ever, you decide
>you attempt to run into the room before you hear the girl scream something
>"STOP! PLEASE!"
>you stop dead in your tracks and look at her with confusion
>"Please, Kir, drop the knife."
>she points at your knife still razor sharp and in your hand
"Oh, sorry."
>you begin to place the knife down before you question her motives
"Wait, are you just going to beat the shit out of me if I drop the knife?"
>"No, Kir."
"And how do you even know my name?"
>at this point you're pointing the knife at the girl subconciously, and her terrified glances at the knife tell you to put it down
>you place the knife down and take a less aggressive stance near the bedframe
"Really, how do you know my name?"
>the girl looks around the floor and tries to conjure another sentence to explain it all
>"Okay, I'm going to level with you; what I'm about to say will sound nuts."
"You've already broken into my house, I can't see anything 'nuttier' than that."
>"No, you see..."
>the girl looks you dead in the eyes with worry
>"I'm... Dusty.."
"Haha! No you aren't get out of my house!"
>you begin to pick up the knife
>"No, I swear! I really am Dusty! I chased you around yesterday, and you fed me cereal, remember?"
"Listen, I'm flattered you wanted to sleep with me, but please, get out of my house. You're intruding."
>the girl gets up and grabs you by the shirt
>oh fuck, at this point you realize that this chick is completley nude
>I guess you didn't notice, mostly because she had the blanket wrapped around her the whole time
>she was built like a goddess, from head to toe
>she looked like she was your age, too
>a beautiful peice of a body, from the way her hips curved, all the way to her br-
>"Listen here, you fuckwad! You picked me up off the city streets all those years ago, remember? I was living in the cardboard box?"
>she's nose-to-nose with you, gripping your shirt and about ready to rip your head off
"There's no way. A-Are you really?"
>"I dunno Kir. Is my favorite show "Ow, My Balls!"?"
>you can't believe it
>Dusty is actually a girl
>it makes sense for the most part, because she never did act like a cat
>with your new sense of understanding, Dusty lets go of your shirt and starts to walk around the room
>holy fuck, that ass, the way it sways back and forth-
>no, Kir
>that's your cat your talking about
>but, she's right here. and a person.
>this is incredible
>Dusty turns back and looks to you and your peeking eye
>she doesn't seem to react to your wandering glances
>"So, what do we do now?"
>she's right
>what do we do?
"Well, if you want to be seen in public, you're going to need some clothes, like the ones I'm wearing."
>"Clothes? Why do you humans need clothes?"
"It's a species thing. It's considered innapropriate to strut your stuff in public."
>with that remark Dusty starts to blush
"Listen, for now all I have are some shorts and t-shirts, but if you want, I can go to the store and pick up some things more, eh, suitable, for your body."
>you hand Dusty a shirt, sweatshirt, some boxxers and basketball shorts
>being the nice guy you are, you decide not to take advantage of this moment and you turn away from her
>it's actually quite interesting
>being a cat, she has no sense of any of the things we consider normal
>like the concept of clothes
>it's quite cute how ignorant she seems to be to this whole "human" thing
>Dusty gives you a tap on the shoulder and you turn around
>for what it's worth she didn't look all too bad in your attire
>it still didn't look good, though
"Here, let's get some breakfast. It's been quite a morning."
>"Sure."
>the two of you head out into the kitchen and you mix up your famous Coco Puff-Wheat Thin-Strawberry Milk masterpeice
>the only difference this time, is that you're making it for two
>all the while Dusty is peering over your shoulders
>you can't help but chuckle at her curiosity
>after all, she's still getting used to this new vantage point she has
>you finish up both servings of breakfast and hand Dusty her very own bowl of cereal
>"I-Is this all for, m-me?"
"It's all for you Dusty."
>Dusty throws the bowl down on the dining table and gives you a larger than life hug
>with her warm embrace, you can also feel her breasts rubbing up against your chest
>fuck, why
>"Thank you thank you thank you! This is what I've always wanted!"
>you tug a little on Dusty so that she's no longer fully embracing you
"What, your dream was to have a bowl of cereal?"
>"After watching you eat it for years, I couldn't resist. That's why I snapped yesterday. I'm sorry."
>Dusty looks at you, awaiting a response for her apology
"Dusty, it's cool. You were only a cat, afterall. I'm sure cats beg all the time."
>"Oh thank you Kir!"
>she gives you one final, huge hug before she darts over to an empty chair and begins wolfing down her cereal
>never in your life did you think you'd be watching some sexy girl absolutley tear through cereal, nonetheless in your house
>milk and cereal was flying everywhere
>apparently the idea of spoons didn't cater well to her
>you calmly set your bowl down on a place across the table from her as you begin to eat your breakfast
>before you could begin, Dusty was done with her food
>she had milk and cereal all over her face
>some even got in her silky, long, strands of hair
>without saying a word, you give her a tech demo on these amazing devices called napkins
>she looks on with astonishment, and rightly so begins to use a napkin to clean herself up
"There you go. See, you're getting it!"
>Dusty finishes cleaning her face
>"Getting what?"
"Being a human. I imagine this is a stressful thing for you to go through."
>Dusty kicks up her legs on the table and rests her arms behind her head
>"Nah, it's chill! This is fun!"
>as she grins, you start to ponder yet another question
"Hey, Dusty... don't you think we should call you something different?"
>Dusty starts to look at you quizzically
"I mean, you're a human now, and Dusty isn't exactly a name for a person.."
>"Oh! I see! You want to give me a human name!"
>thank god she understood
>you didn't want this chick running around on the streets with some identity crisis bullshit
"Well, pretty much, yeah. Is that okay with you?"
>"Of course it is! Can I be called Danielle?"
"Wow. That was fast. Why Danielle?"
>"Because I always wanted to be called that."
>she smiles at you, but you can't help but feel bad feels
>you called her Dusty all these years, when in reality she wanted a different name
"Sure. For now on, you'll be Danielle. Sound good?"
>"Kick ass!"
>Dusty, now Danielle, fist pumps in excitement
>god, she really is quite the character
>as you finish up your breakfast, you also grab Danielle's bowl and get ready to clean dishes
>but before you can start, Danni grabs your arms and stares you down
>"Let me do this."
"Dust- Danielle, are you sure about this?"
>"Yes."
>there was a fire in her eyes
>the only way the fire would be put out is if she washed the dishes
>she grabbed a sponge and began pounding it against the bowls
>"I see you do this so many times, I could do it in my sleep!"
>you appreciate her cocky attitude, but anymore of this "cleaning" will break your dishes
"Wow, look at that, Danni!"
>"Did you just call me Da-"
"You cleaned up all those dishes!"
>Danielle drops the dishes in the sink
>"Oh my god! I did?"
"You sure did, Danni!"
>Danielle parades around to room in celebration
>you hear a couple of thing break, so you whip your head around to see what the commotion is about
>"Fucking right I cleaned those dishes!"
>Danielle proceeds to kick a lamp out of it's socket and sends it flying across the hall
"Danni! What are you doing?!"
>Danielle looks across the hall at you and mouths the word "Sorry", as she scampers across the house to retrieve the lamp
>you chuckle at her as you turn your attention back to the dishes
>this time, you'll make sure they get cleaned the right way
>the house goes silent for a number of minutes
>all of a sudden you feel arms wrap around your waist
>"Gotcha!"
>Danielle rests her head on your shoulder as she starts to laugh
"You really are having fun with this, aren't you?"
>Danielle turns her head so that it's only centimeters from yours
>"Oh? What makes you say that?"
>she laughs once more and releases her grip on your waist
>Danni runs into the living room where you hear a ruckus
>"Hey, is it okay if I turn on the TV?"
"Yeah, go ahead. You've been doing it for months now anyways, right?"
>"...Shut up..."
>you take her insult with a grain of salt as you finish up the dishes
>you dry your hands off with a nearby towel as you make entrance into the living room
>you spot Danielle sitting quite comfortably on your couch
>you turn your attention to the show she's watching
>TV: "AND ON TODAY'S EPISODE OF 'OW, MY BALLS!', HOW CAN JIM GET OUT OF HIS NEW PREDICAMENT?"
>Jim (on TV): "OW, MY BALLS!"
>"Hah! Kir, this is some funny shit, you know."
"For you, maybe. I don't tend to watch this kind of stuff."
>"Don't be such a wuss! Take a seat!"
>Danielle pats for you to sit next to her on the couch
>looking at the time, it's only 9:23
>what a morning
>again
>you oblige, and take a spot in between Danielle and the arm rest
>with each stroke of laughter, Danielle inches closer and closer to you untill she's resting her head on your chest
>heh, yeah, this isn't awkward at all..
>suddenly, Danni's laughing stops and she looks up at you
"Yeah? What's up?"
>she gets a serious look on her face
>"Listen, hey, I know this is a bit weird of me to ask, but.."
>oh god
>what is it
>"Could you, maybe, rub my head? Kinda like if I was a cat?"
>oh, phew
"Heh, yeah, of course."
>"Thanks."
>her attention returns to "Ow, My Balls!" as you begin to rub her head
>it's cute that she likes this show so much
>but it's so weird seeing a girl looking as fine as her laughing at this kind of humor
>it's more suited for trailer-trash, at least in your opinion
>a couple of hours pass before you can even bother to say anything
>her show ended a while ago, and at this point you both are watching some Cricket
>"How does this even work?!"
>Danni throws an arm at the tv in disgust and looks to you for agreement
"I have no idea. Say, how about we get you some clothes like I was talking about earlier?"
>Danielle's eyes light up and she jumps out of her spot on the couch
>aww, you were starting to get comfy
>"Oh yes yes yes yes! That'd be fucking rad! Let's go!"
>Danielle grabs ahold of your arm and runs straight out the front door
"Wait! I need my wallet and my keys. Besides, did you even know where you were going?"
>Danielle frees your arm and begins to kicks some dirt in embarrasment
>"N-no..."
"Don't worry about it. We'll take my car. You've never been to the mall, have you? This place is awesome."
>"A "mall'? What's that?"
"Oh, honey, you're in for a treat. Especially for girls, this is the place to be."
>your final sentence had Danielle frantically running to the car, using her newfound hands to attempt to open the door
>"Fuck! Why won't this damned thing open?!"
>you press the 'unlock' button on your car keys
"I needed to unlock it first."
>Danielle calms down and opens the door gently, and much to her surprise, it opens.
>she points at the open door and looks to you for approval
"Yes, you can go inside."
>"Sweet!"
>Danni hops into the car and smashes the door closed
>she eagerly waits for you to hop in and drive
>"Hurry up! I need to see this 'mall' for myself!"
"Give me a minute, jeeze!"
>the two of you share a chuckle as you race to your car
>looking over at the neighboring house, you notice all the blinds are down
>odd, it's nearly lunchtime
>upon further inspection however, you see that someone is peeping over at you and Danni from one of the lower windows
>as soon as you and the stalker make eye contact, the blinds come falling down
"Huh. That's weird."
>"What's weird? Your ass not being in the car?!"
>Danielle laughs at her joke uncontrollably
"No, it's just that.."
>Danni stops in mid laugh and looks to you concerningly
"I-It's nothing. Here, let's go."
>"Yeah!"
>you've arrived at the mall, and you can see Danni through your mirrior gawking at the humongous concrete slab
>"Woah... shit.."
"Yeah, it's pretty big, right?"
>Danielle turns her attention to you and it's clear that the size and stature of the mall is blowing her away
>she still doesn't offer to chime in, she continues to awe at the mall outside of her window
>you park the car and proceed to turn in off and walk outside
>you're now standing directly outside of Danielle's window, and you jokingly motion for her to come out
>opening the door, she offers her first review of the mall
>"This mall is huge! Fucking balls."
"What would you do if I said this was one of the smallest in the country?"
>Danni grimaces with the thought
>"I'd say you were crazy."
"Well good, because it's actually one of the biggest in the world."
>you smile as she shoots you a dirty look
>in time she starts to chuckle and joins in with you
"Let's get you some clothes, huh?"
>"Sure!"
>you lock the car as the two of you walk towards the Costco entrance of the mall
>if you're going to introduce Danielle to stores, you might as well start off with the largest one
>the largest one, like, ever
>walking through the door, you're greeted with an employee standing at the door welcoming everyone
>"Welcome to Costco. I love you."
>there's no expression on the man's face, as it appears his brain hasn't even checked in yet
>"Welcome to Costco. I love you."
>he's just looking straight ahead
>you and Danni walk by the man and give eachother concerning glances
>"Welcome to Costco. I love you."
>finally you break free from the entrance and you show Danielle around
"So this is Costco. It's probably one of the largest stores ever made."
>the dim lighting of the factory-sized store allows you only to make out some faucets of Danni's face
>"You humans sure love overdoing things, don't you?"
>you chuckle at her notion
"I'm pretty sure there's even a college in here, too."
>you look over at Danni and give her a shit eating grin
>she realizes now that you were joking and eases up
"If you want to buy something, and a lot of it, this is the place for you."
>you and Danni walk past mounds and mounds of canned food, none of which look appealing to you
>or her, for that matter
>she reads 'CANNED TURKEY' and immediatley shows disgust
>"You guys EAT this shit?"
"Sister, if you had only ten dollars and it was to hold you over for a week, I'm sure you'd eat all the canned turkey you could get at."
>"I'd rather die than have to eat that shit."
"Hah, ok."
>the two of you continue the march down the where the Costco turns into the rest of the mall
>guys walking by the two of you scope Danielle and you're sure to let them know she's not available
>as soon as guys look up at you, you're already looking at them, shaking your head
>typically they nod and shurg in mutual acknowledgement with you and continue walking
>after what feels like hours go by, you finally see where the Costco and mall converge
>the bleak lighting of Costco is thrown against the sharp, white lighting of the rest of the mall
>it's a big relief to get out of there alive, and with Danielle by your side
>you appear to be on the third story of the mall, somehow
>you entered Costco at ground level, and never once went up any large stairs or evelvators
>i guess Costco says 'fuck it' to everyone else's logic and follows their own
>you walk over to the mall directory and start looking for clothing stores
>Danielle is sprawed out from the guard rail and is testing out her hands by waving at everyone
>with no surprise, most are waving back
>if some fine peice of body waved at you, chances are you'd probably wave back, too
>you have to hand it to her, though
>she's getting one hell of a kick out of this human thing
>taking your attention back to the directory, you begin looking for clothing stores
"Gap? No.."
"Target? Maybe.."
>then you glance over at one more store's name
>"And how was your day, dude?!"
>now she's engaging in conversations with the folk down at the first level
>"It was fucking sweet! Thanks, babe!"
>you can't help but laugh as you contemplate the final store
>Victoria's Secret
>you could take this time and poke fun at Danni
>this could be hilarious, and it's about time you amused yourself, too
>Danielle's presense into a human-form has showed you a few things
>one of which is to relax and smell the flowers every now and again
>you look back and forth between the location of VS and Danni, still having a blast
"Hey, Danielle! I found a store, let's go!"
>"Sweet! Wait, let me say bye to this girl down there!"
"Heh, sure thing."
>Danielle takes a final wave as you make a mental note of Victoria's Secret's location
>store 225
>second floor
>oh boy, this is going to send your sides into orbit
>you can't wait for Danni's reaction when the two of you walk into the store
>although, after that debacle, you're still going to need a place to buy actual clothes
>Target will suffice
>the two of you walk to the nearest elevator and step inside
>"Wow, what is this?"
"It's an elevator. It's a normal everyday thing here."
>Danielle puts her hands on the glass and surveys the entire elevator in excitement
>"It's just a glass box! How does it even work?"
"It has it's ways. Hey, watch out, we're about to move."
>"Move?"
>the elevator doors close and the glass box, as Danni has coined it, begins to rumble and descend
>Danielle nearly loses her footing and falls over
"Watch out there, don't fall over."
>you laugh at Danielle as she's awkwardly positioned back against the wall, legs bent, and hair flying everywhere
>"This is fucking nuts!"
"It's only an elevator. Have you heard of rollercoasters? Now THOSE are crazy."
>"Hey, yeah! I've seen those on 'Ow, My Balls!""
>you raise an eyebrow at that remark as the elevator comes to a standstill and opens it's doors
>Danielle picks herself up and starts to brush her hair back with her hands
>she's picking up on this human thing really fast
>the two of you step out of the elevator and you begin to lead
>off in the far distance, you make out what you believe is Victoria's Secret
>"So, where are we going? What store did you choose?"
>you didn't want to spoil the surprise
"Oh, uh, it's a secret. I can't tell you, sorry."
>Danielle looks on in dissapointment, but she doesn't hold it against you for long
>"Okay, well, what do you want to do when we finish shopping for clothes?"
>the store inches closer
>without missing a beat, you answer her
"Let's get some lunch over at the food court. Would you be down for that?"
>"Snootch to the nooch!"
>Danni holds her hand up for a high-five, but your mouth drops
>some stoners nearby turn around and look over at Danielle
>they're stunned at how such a 'not-stoner' looking person could say such a thing
"Uh, Danielle? You might not want to, er, 'drop that lingo', in front of everyone."
>Danielle puts her hands on her hips
>fucking damn, that bod
>"Why not? I hear that on television all the time!"
>you lean in and whisper into her ear
"That's something stoners drop. Do you want to have those filthy fuckers walking up and trying to stir shit with you?"
>"I dunno. I wouldn't mind it. Not that I'd run away with them."
"Well, good. To be honest, this is more of a safeguard for me. I don't want people picking you up and walking away, y'know?"
>she nods and the two of you continue on the quest for VS
>after a moment silence, Danni is the first to speak up
>"So.. what else shouldn't I say?"
>you ponder her question for a bit before responding
"Well, in public, it's usually poor manners to swear."
>assessing the damage she's done, the look on her face reveals that she may have been swearing more than you thought
>"Sorry about that.."
"Nah, in private it's cool. Just try not to cuss in public."
>you now find yourself in the food court with Danielle
>she has bags and bags of clothes you've gathered from VS and Target
>and being any normal dude, you said you were 'more than happy' to carry it all for her
>although if you knew just how heavy it all was, you'd probably have said otherwise
>you had no real budget for anything, so you let Danielle order anything she wanted
>after her massacre of your wallet, it seemed all she wanted was a milkshake
>you picked up some fries for yourself as you pay the person working at the register
>lugging all of Danni's shit back to a table in the foodcourt, you were happy to finally set down the bags
>during this time you showed Danni your phone, and how to use it
>maybe if you felt comfortable with it, later you could give her your old phone and let her run around
>however, one weird thing caught you off guard
>looking behind Danielle, you noticed far in the back of the mall was a familiar face
>it was that Ben-looking faggot
>everything would have been fine if it wasn't for the fact he was looking directly at you
>you point at yourself and ask 'me?'
>you see Ben point back at you without hesitation and mouth 'you'
>fuck
"Hey, uh, Danielle, we need to get out of here."
>"What, why? I was about to finish this level!"
"I have, uh, a meeting I need to go to in a minute."
>"A meeting? You don't have a job that needs you going to meetings!"
"Uh, well, that's the thing; this is a new job I have."
>"Oh! Is it? Cool!"
"Heh, yeah, it is. Let's go."
>you grab the bags of shit and attempt to waddle as wuickly as possible out of the mall
>looking back at where Ben once stood, the place is now occupied with the feet of people walking back and forth between stores
>shit
"Let's hurry up, I don't want to be late."
>you continue to book it through the mall entrance and are thankful to reach your car with no events happening
>you throw the shit into the back of the car and Danni joins you up in the passenger's seat
>you hop in the driver's side and turn the key, ultimatley turning the car on
>you pull your seatbelt over you, and this is when you spot Ben now looking at you from the entrance of the mall
>he has a devilish grin and waves at you
>fuckfuckfuck
>you nearly strangle yourself trying to put your seatbelt on, but you managed to pull it on in record time
>you stomp on the gas and get the fuck out of there
>another look over at the mall entrance shows that Ben is nowhere to be seen
"This is some real crazy shit going on right now."
>"I'm sorry, what?"
"Oh. Sorry, it's nothing."
>you let your thoughts escape you
>fuck dammit, man
>you don't want to send Danni into a frenzy too
>for the ease of her, you try and play it cool
>on the drive home, your thoughts are racing

>so, i have a sex offender chasing after me
>wait, what about that guy in the window?
>oh, fuck, what if that was him?
>no, you're kir, you can get out of this one alive
>to hell with this guy if he thinks he can fuck you
>yeah, fuck him
>but not like that
>but.. what if that was a different person?
>do i have two people chasing after me?
>what do they want with me?
>i mean, i look good, but not 'rapeable' good
>am i just that irresistable?

>you look over at Danielle and attempt to give her sexy eyes
>this will prove whether or not you're a person-pulling machine
>she just blankly looks at you in return
>"W-What are you doing?"
>fuck
>didn't work
>you turn your head back to the road with no response

>what is it with me? why do they want me?
>i can call the police
>'yeah, officer, i have at least one faggot trying to rape me'
>that's going to boil over well with the boys at the police station
>better yet, i should probably keep and extra eye on Danielle, too
>i don't need any unwanted shit happening to the two of us
>so does that mean i just keep her in the house all day?
>that's kinda brutal, i mean, she's been living this way her whole life, and now that she's a person, am i one to just lock her up once more?
>fuck this, your head is hurting

>"Hey, wasn't that our house you just.. passed..?"

>what do i do, should i stockpile some weapons?
>what would happen to me if i killed a guy?
>i'd go to prision, defientley, but what of was in self defense?
>i think that's perfectly legal
>wait, i can always call nox, my old friend
>he usually knows his way about these things
>yeah, i'm sure nox will be mroe than happy to help me out

>"Our street.. you just..?"
>Danielle turns around and points at the street in the distance you've turned from
"Oh, sorry about that."
>Danielle looks over you
>"Is everything alright?"
"Yeah, yeah. I'm just getting ready for my, uh, meeting."
>"Okay.. Whatever you say."
>Danielle blows off your excuse and looks out her window
>eventually you turn back onto your street and park in your driveway
>you and Danielle carry the bags into the house, and you take them into your guestroom where you decide Danni can sleep
>she puts all her clothes out on the bed and examines every peice
"Is everything all good?"
>you lean on the doorframe, arms folded, relaxed
>or, atleast, attempting to look relaxed
>"Yeah. It's.. it's awesome."
>she looks up to you and smiles
>"Thank you."
>you can't help but return her smile
"Of course, it's not a problem."
>she acknowledges your response and starts to pick out peices of clothing to wear
"I'll just leave you be while you get comfortable. Sound good?"
>"It does. Thanks again, this means a lot."
"Hey, it's all good. I'm going to close the door now. If you need anything, just ask."
>Danielle waves at you as you gently close the door
>you whip right around and bolt for the landline near your sink
>you see Sandwich once more licking his balls on the carpet
"Sandwich, you really need to get your shit together."
>you grab the phone and begin dialing Rainer's number
>it's been a couple of months, but you're sure that he'll pick up
>it feels like an eternity, but Nox finally picks up
>"Uh, hello?"
"Nox? It's Kir, remember me?"
>"Wha- oh shit!"
>you hear muffling and the sounds of something dropping on his side of the phone
"Are you okay there?"
>"Yeah- dude! It's been months! How've you been?"
"Well, it was all good until this morning."
>"Has it? What's been going on?"
"You won't believe it, but my cat somehow transformed into the sexiest woman ever to walk the planet."
"But besides that, it's been uneventful."
>silence on the other line
>"... and just how much dope have you been smokin', man!?"
"No, I swear to god. I'd show you if I could."
>"Send me a picture of that shit, man!"
"Later. That's not why I called you."
>"Oh, it wasn't? What's up, you didn't want to talk to your ol' buddy Nox?"
"No, it's just that-"
>"How come we don't just talk anymore, man? It's always, 'Hey, Nox, I need money' or it's 'Hey, Kir, I need money'-"
"I need some advice. This is serious."
>"Serious shit, huh? How much do you need this time?"
"No, it's- fuck. Just listen for a moment, please."
>"That's what I've been doing for months; waiting for the phone to ring!"
"Fuck, no. Listen, I have at least one rapist on my tail, I'm pretty sure there might be another as well."
>"Wow, that's gotta suck, man."
"That's undervaluing the situation, Nox. These two faggots are chasing after me and I have that girl, Danielle, in my house, this isn't-"
>"Oh, damn, you're not saying-"
"Fuck, no! I don't want that to happen! I'm calling and asking you for advice."
>there's an uneasy silence on the line as Nox picks his words carefully
"I just want to know if it's morally justified for me to, I don't know, say, shoot them if they get on my property. Is it?"
>more silence fills the line between the two of you
"Nox, buddy, please-"
>"Listen, don't tell anyone, but, I,"
>"Oh god, how do I say this.."
"What? Just say it, man. We're all in this together."
>"I just got back from murdering a rapist of my own."
"Hah, funny shit! No really, please."
>"No, I'm dead serious. You know Chris-Chan?
>holy fuck
>did he kill ian?
"No way, really? You didn't."
>"Look it up right now on your computer. I killed CWC."
>well hey, this would have been a swell time to have a laptop
"Yeah, I'll uh, I'll do it later."
>suddenly it hits you
"Nox, you fucking KILLED SOMEONE?"
>"Hey, he was trying to rape me! Or kill me! I couldn't tell!"
>"I've seen shit, man. Listen, if they step on your property and start to get aggressive, just grab a gun and shoot them."
>an awkward pause
>"Don't waste time.. like I did."
>"Or else you might see the people you give shit about leave you.."
"Nox, did something happe-"
>"No, no. It's all good. Kir, promise me you'll stay safe, man."
"Yeah, don't worry, I'll keep it real."
>"..Hah, there's my fucking buddy. Keep it real, stay safe, I'll chat with you in a few, okay? 'Ow, My Balls!' is about to come on, and it's a new episode today."
"Oh god, you watch that, too?"
>"Dude, it's won, like, 3 fucking Emmys! I gotta go, stay in touch."
"Of course. See you later."
>you place the phone back into it's holder and turn around to lean against the sink
>you spot Danielle in the doorway looking at you
"Oh, fuck.. How long have you been there?"
>"I've, uh, I've heard enough."
>Danielle kicks her foot up against the carpet and you take in your new look
>she's wearing a shirt with a generous cut, and she has on some shorts and long-socks
>it all complements her curvature pretty well, you'd say
"Listen, Danni, it'll be fine. I promise."
>you put a hand on her shoulder and she looks up at you
"We'll just have to hide out for a bit. This'll suck, I know."
>you let go and start to walk towards Sandwich
>"Why can't you just call the police?"
>you pick up Sandwich in mid-ball lick
"They won't believe me when I say Ben's trying to get at me."
>Danielle takes a seat on the wall with her arms wrapped around her legs
>"But he's one of those 'sex offenders', like you said. They'd have to believe you, Kir."
>you start petting Sandwich and take a seat across the hall from Danielle
"It's the police. Fucking hell if they actually take anything we say seriously."
>Danielle give you a disgusted look
>"Oh my god, you're one of those people? Just call the damned police!"
"Listen, Danielle, you just don't get it!"
>you raise your tone in anger
>"Oh, YEAH? WHAT MAKES YOU SAY THAT?"
"BECAUSE AT THE END OF A DAY, YOU'RE STILL JUST A FUCKING CAT!"
>your remark strikes a nerve with Danielle as she looks at you with anguish
>"...How could you?"
>you finally realize the true impact of what you just said
"No, no, Danni, I'm sorry-"
>you try and condole her but she shoves you away from her
>"Get the fuck off of me! And I thought you actually cared about me, too!"
>Danielle races out of her spot and runs over to the front window
"What, and all this time when I took care of you when you were a cat? That means nothing?"
>Danielle's back is turned to you as she peers outside the window
>"I just, I-"
>Danielle turns around and gives you a light shove before going to the kitchen
>"I didn't know you would still think of me as a cat. But you do."
>she looks up at you
>"Am I just another object in your fucking life?"
>she gestures towards herself awaiting a response
"Danielle, no, I-"
>"I am, aren't I? Face the fucking light, Kir! I'm a person, now! I'm not a cat, wake up! There's no turning back, you fucking jerk!"
>is this what it's like to have a girlfriend?
>fuck that then
>you run your hand through your hair
>Danielle still awaits a response
"I'm sorry.. I was overcome with-"
>"With what? A feeling that you're oh-so-mighty and powerful, and I'm just a dumbwit in it for the ride? I can do things too, you know!"
"I just-"
>"I'm more than capable of handling myself! I'll show you, I'm not just a cat anymore! I can take care of myself!"
"Don't! Don't even go out there! It's not safe, Danielle!"
>"Do I look like I care?"
"Why did you get so butthurt over this?"
>Danielle winces at your choice of words before attempting to conjure a reply
>"I just.. I don't want to be your cat anymore. I mean, look at me, I'm a person, right?"
>hell yeah you are, babe
"Yes, but, it's just, this is all so fucking weird. One day you're my cat, and now you aren't?"
>"Exactly, Kir. I'm not your cat anymore. I'm not a pet anymore."
"Well then, wh-"
>"Can I just be your friend, now?"
>those words hit you right in the feels
>she's finally becoming self-aware and accepting this human thing full-time
>you should at least return the favor and drop the whole 'cat' thing, too
"Sure. Of course you can. Listen, I'm sorry about my outburst, it's just-"
>"Come here, you faggot."
>Danielle pulls you into another one of her tight-hugs
>she still hasn't gotten this whole human-etiquette thing down yet, as her chest balloons are nearly suffocating you
>you pull away from the hug in order to take a swig of air
>she looks at you with a grin
>"What, now you're too good for my hugs, as well?"
"You nearly suffocated me.."
>she looks on with worry
"..you crazy bitch."
>with that reference to the day she chased you, you can't help but smile at her reaction
>she starts to laugh and relaxes
>"Oh, you suck."
"It's better than swallowing. I'll be in my room taking a nap if you need me. Stay safe, and please, don't go outside."
>she looks up at you with a confirming smile
>god, why does she have to look so beautiful
>the way her eyes trap you into a daze is astounding
>you swear you can see everything in them
>"Don't worry. I'll stay here."
>you escape your trance and wave to Danni as you begin to walk towards your room
>before closing the door, you can make out the muffled sounds of the televsion
>TV: "...ow! my balls!"
>you laugh to yourself as you shut the door
>you wake to hear loud beeping from outside your door
>on further inspection, your door was wide open
>Danielle was on top of you trying to wake you up
>as you made eye contact with her it appears she was shaking you trying to wake you up
>"Oh, thank god! Help me, there's a fire!"
>Danni points over outside the door to where the beeping was coming from
"Wait, WHAT?"
>you roll Danielle over to the other side of the bed and sprawl out, sprinting over to the kitchen
>sure enough, there was a small fire burning on the stove
>you rip the batteries out of the fire alarm and raced downstairs to get your fire extinguisher
>Danielle follows and hangs out near the doorframe of the closet
>"I'm so sorry! I tried to make you some dinner, but-"
"It's fine, Danni. Here, grab this."
>you toss her a smaller fire extinguisher and lead the charge upstairs
>Sandwich is sitting on the couch staring at the two of you as you trudge up the stairs
"Here, pull this lever right here,"
>you pull some and Danielle's extinguisher starts spewing foam
>"Woah, shit!"
>as you start your extinguisher, you look over and see Danielle's having a fun time directing foam over the blazing fire
>she's smiling and you can't help but notice her pearly whites
>lord almighty, this girl is beautiful in every way
>c'mon, God, why did you have to punish me like this?
>by the time you stopped scoping Danielle, you see that the fire's put out
"Wow, did you..?"
>with a twinkle in her smile, Danni responds
>"I did! You see, I can take care of myself!"
"Well, you caused the fire in the first place, didn't you?"
>your remark didn't sit well with Danielle, as she groans and positions her extinguisher's nozzle in your direction
>she pulls the trigger and sends foam your way
>you can hear her distinct laugh as your face is surrounded with foam
>by the time Danielle finishes painting you with foam, she's nearly on the ground laughing
>you clean foam from your eyes and toss it over at Danni
>she haults her giggle and looks sternly at you
>"You asshole."
>she grins and picks up her extinguisher
>you do the same and ready your weapon
>the two of you share shit-eating grins before you start your foam war
>hours have passed, and you and Danielle lie on the floor covered in foam
>Danielle is breathing heavily, trying to catch her breath in-between laughing fits
>you, however, just lie on the floor staring up at the ceiling
>man, you've never had this much fun in quite some time
>there was, however, a price to pay for all this fun
>there was foam you had to clean up, and it was scattered all throughout the kitchen
>before you can even begin to get up, Danni jumps ontop of you and pins you down
>playfully, you might add
>she grins and locks eyes with you
>strands of her long, brown hair topple your face
>she starts to giggle at the scene
>that beautiful smile, and that laugh
>you're glad that she's here
>she's someone who could really lift your spirits
>and as shown today, when need be, she can also give you a swift kick in the ass
>"What's up, Jerk?"
>you smile and pick up some foam to send her way
>she goes rolling to your side as her face gets smothered with foam
>you laugh, but not before she throws twice the amount of foam at you
>spitting up foam, you get up and decide to conjure some words
"I should probably clean this up."
>Danielle sits upright and takes in the scene of your kitchen
>it looked like a shopping mall in December
>"It looks like shit."
"Hah, you know, it does."
>the two of you sit and take in the sight of the kitchen, completley covered in a blizzard of white
>you get up and grab a towel
"Let's clean you up, too. You can jump in the shower and I'll mop up this mess."
>Danielle looks at you with worry
>"A shower? No, I'm good. Thanks."
"No, really. You need to shower. It's another human thing we do."
>Danielle starts to pout
>"Fuck, really? C'mon, it's been only a day!"
"And it's nearly time to go to sleep. Look at the time."
>pointing over to the clock, it reads 10:23
"Trust me, it's nothing. I can, uh, show you, if you want."
>"If it's anything like the baths you used to give me-"
"Don't worry, it's not. Here, let's go pick out some night clothes for you."
>"Alright, sounds chill."
>Danielle leads into her room as she picks out some clothes still laid out on the bed
>it seems she hasn't noticed the drawers yet
"You know, you have drawers right over for your clothes, see?"
>you open one of the empty drawers to Danni's surprise
>"Oh! Is that where I put this stuff?"
>Danielle guestures with a bra in hand
"Hah, yeah, sure. Why not?"
>after finding something comfy for Danielle, you walk into the bathroom and begin to show her how to use everything
>explaining how to use the toilet was awkward, even for you
>thankfully Danni picked up fast
>the sink was much easier to explain, and soon enough it was time to show her the shower
"Okay, so, before taking a shower, make sure that you take your clothes off and put it in this hamper right over here-"
>you turn to Danielle who's currently stripping before you, starting with her top
>as much as you wanted her to continue, you avert your eyes and look away
"Danni! Not in front of people! Wait until I'm out.."
>"Oh. Sorry."
>Danielle puts her top back on
>"You humans are fucking weird, you know that?"
"I'm not the one pulling my clothes off, am I?"
>"You're funny. You can look now."
>you look back at Danielle thankful she's not continuing her tease, and you start to show her the workings of the shower
"So if you turn this handle this way, the water will be hot, and if you turn it the other way, it will be cold."
>you look back up to Danielle who's nodding with your every word
"You'll have to play with the handle to get the right temperature. But besides that, just turn it all the way to the right like so, and the water will turn off. Sound good?"
>"Yup. I got this under control, T-Kib."
>haha, what?
"Did you just call me..?"
>"T-Kib? Fucking right I did! You call me Danni, I'm just returning the favor."
>you can't help but appreciate her sense of humor, wether or not it sometimes hits you in the wrong place
"Alright, well, I guess you have everything under control. I'll leave you be, then. I'll be in the kitchen if you need me."
>"Cool! Thanks."
>you pick up an extra towel for your venture to the kitchen
"It's not a problem, have fun."
>you shut the door on your way out and head towards your kitchen
>god, this scene was horrible
>your kitchen has turned to shit
>you place the towel on the countertop
>you spot Sandwich poke his head out of the foam in a corner of the kitchen.
"Get out of there, you rascal."
>you walk over and pick him up, cleaning off any foam still attached to his body
"Don't do anything stupid, alright? I'll have to clean the kitchen for a bit, so try and stay out."
>you hear the shower turn on in the background
>you put Sandwich down in the living room, and he trots up to the couch where he retires for the night
>you turn your attention back to the kitchen
>a mop; i need one of those
>you walk over to your cleaning closet in the hall and grab your mop
"So this is what it's like to be a janitor, huh?"
>you take the mop out of the water-filled bucket and begin mopping the kitchen floor
>the foam itself wasn't too difficult to clean up, it was just the fact that there was so much of it
>that alone would mean you'd be here for a while
>you take this time to recount the day's past events;
>you woke up and found a sexy girl sleeping with you in bed
>you find out this is formerly Dusty, now Danielle
>you know her dream in life is to have cereal all for herself
>you took her clothes shopping
>and, well, you saw Ben today
>you probably shouldn't have called him a faggot before slamming the door in his face
>speaking of which, you remember seeing your neighbor peaking on you
>you also remember your fight with Danni, but thankfully everything was resolved
>and that now brings you here; you took a nap, and during which Danielle tried cooking for you
>the gesture was more than appreciated, but it was the reason for your current duty at 'cleanup'
>although, you really had a lot of fun playing with Danni in the foam
>you remember the gleam in her eyes, the way she looked into you when she was on top of you
>she sure did like pinning you down, huh?
>neverless, it's pretty cute
>you hear the shower turn off
>this sound alone is enough to kick you back into gear
"Shit, I better hurry up."
>you start mopping with more intensity and you eagerly try and rid the floor of any foam
"God, I hope I'm never a janitor."
>you muffle that remark under your breath as you sway the mop back and forth, nearly finishing the kitchen floor
>as you hear the bathroom door crack open, you finish up the final square of the floor
>to fuck with the stove, i'll clean that tomorrow
>Danielle walks out to the kitchen doorframe
>you spot the nightgown she picked out, and the short-shorts as well
>does everything look fantasic on her?
"Wow, you look amazing."
>Danni shyly chuckles
>"I'm sorry, what?"
"S-Shit. Sorry. I didn't mean to, well, I did, but I, you-"
>you were a stuttering stumbling spaghetti spilling machine at this point
>Danielle laughs at your murdering of English grammar
>"Chillax. It's cool."
>Danielle's warm smile sends warm feels through your body
>it appears these same feels are calming you down
"Sorry. I didn't mean to say that out loud, that's all."
>Danni shakes her head and giggles some more
>"It's fine. Thanks for the compliment."
"Hah, yeah. Er, no problem."
>"I'll meet you bedroom?"
"Yeah, sure thing, one sec-"
>wait, what?
"Wait, Danni?"
>she's already bolted out of the hall and into your room
>shit
>it seems she doesn't want to sleep in her bed
>fucking hell
>as long as no funny business happens, you're fine wih this
>after all, you've  been controlling yourself amazingly as of late
>you finish up in the kitchen, stow away the mop, and head towards your bedroom
>you look over and see Danni sprawled out on your bed playing with your pillows
>"Catch!"
>she tosses a pillow at your forehead
>you catch it, and ricochet it right back to her
"Catch!"
>catching her off guard, the pillow is a direct hit to her head as you see her hair go flying
>you can't help but laugh
>Danielle blows some hair away from the front of her face
>"Thanks, asshole."
"Sure thing, it's what i'm here for."
>you walk over to the corner of the room where you usually strip down into boxers and a t-shirt
>Danielle is staring right at you, and you only notice moments before you're taking off your pants
"May I have some privacy, Danni?"
>Danielle shakes her head and blinks a couple of times, regaining conciousness
>"Of course. My bad."
>Danielle hides her head underneath the top-most blanket while you prepare for the night
"It's safe now."
>you propel yourself onto the bed as you take some pillows from Danielle's pillow fort she had been making
>Danni pops her head from underneath the covers and examines your every move with a curious glance
"What's up? Never slept on a bed before?"
>you smirk at her as she slaps your shoulder
>"Oh, shut up."
>she smiles back and pulls a blanket over her bare shoulders, back facing you
"So I guess that's 'goodnight', then?"
>she flips over to face you
>"You guys even have bedtime rituals, too? That's cute."
>she jabs at you with her words as she pokes your nose
"Well God, 'goodnight' to you too, Danni."
>with that 'goodnight' you poke her back and make yourself comfy underneath the covers
>you see that Danielle smiles as she drifts off to sleep
>would it be too awkward if you pulled her in?
>nahh, whatever
>you grab Danielle's far side as you pull her into a warm pull
>"...What's this all about?"
"Sharing body heat. It's another thing humans do."
>"...Ah..."
>too sleepy to care, Danni rests an arm on your stomach and embraces your gesture as she places her head on your chest before one final sigh
>"..Goodnight."
"Sweet dreams."
>you turn off the final lamp that's emiting light in the room and you make your way into wonderland
END DAY 2

>you crawl out of your bed and peer outside
>you see nothing but black
>but peering out further, you can spot some lights radiating out in the distance
"Wow, this is fucking nuts! Danni, take a look!"
>you glance back at where Danni is sleeping
>the cute girl on your bed still hasn't woken up
>you decide to walk over to her and gently shake her
"Danielle, wake up."
>you can hear her groan as she starts to regain conciousness
"C'mon, you bedhead."
>you laugh to yourself as you lie down on the bed, now eye level with Danni
>slowly she begins to move and look up at you
>"...Uh... What's up..?"
>Danni blinks and focuses in on you
"There's some crazy shit going on outside, check it out!"
>you point towards the window where you can still see lights flashing
"Isn't that crazy?"
>you stare again at the window with astonishment, and there is no answer from Danielle
"Danni, is everythin-"
>you feel a pull of your shirt as Danielle forces you closer to her
>"Do you want to see something even crazier..?"
>Danielle grins as you can help but get a little aroused by her tone
>you decide you'll try and play it cool
"Uh, haha, no. I don't."
>Danielle runs a hand through your hair
>"Well, that's a shame, because Danni over here is going to show you anyways~"
>Danielle moves closer to you
>she closes her eyes as her lips begin to make contact with yours
>the sensation of it all is sending shivers up and down your body
>Danni takes a moment to breathe before continuing her assault of your mouth
>with the next kiss, she pushes her tongue into your mouth
>you've all but stopped trying to resist it
>i mean, she was the one that started this
>your internal dialogue is interuppted with Danielle dancing her tongue around yours
>well, fuck it
>you might as well embrace it
>much to her surprise, you start to dig your tongue deep into her mouth
>you hear a surprised squeak, followed by a giggle
>eventually Danni lets go and a strand of saliva still connects your tongues together
"Danni... What are you doing?"
>she begins to trace a finger up and down your chest
>"Don't you see, already?"
>she leans in closer
>"I want you."
>her eyes are filled with lust and she brings you in closer for another kiss
>but before you can return the favor, your side starts stinging
>you break in mid-kiss and examine your stinging side
>you see blood streaking down from your side
"Oh god! What the fuck?"
>silence from Danielle
>the blood has seeped through your shirt and a puddle of it has collected by the side of the bed
>you pull up your shirt and discover a large gaping hole in your side
>your internal organs are on public display as a nice, large chunk of skin is absent from your side
"Oh fuck! God, no!"
>you try and jump off the bed towards your bathroom, but as soon as you try and touch down on the floor, your legs become paralyzed
>in agonizing pain, you fall over and make a splash in your own pool of blood
>silence
>you start to scream for Danielle
"Please, help me! Help me!"
>you become confused and your vision begins to blur
>silence
"Danielle, answer me! FUCKING ANSWER ME!"
>you scream as the pain striking in your legs moves up towards the rest of your body
>with all that you can, you attempt to rest yourself on the side of the bed
>using your arms, you drag yourself towards the side and try to pull yourself up
"Danielle, please, help me..."
>you look over to Danielle who's blankly staring at you
>horror fills your body as the pain slowly inches closer to your chest
>your vision only gets worse, and you start to shake and tremble
"...Please, do something..."
>Danielle doesn't bat an eye, and continues staring at you
>these will be your final moments, you already know it
"...I..."
>everything shoots into darkness
>your bed disappears
>Danielle disappears
>you feel your pain escape you, but you're now in a freefall
>you can't make out the floor, or when you'd hit it
>all you can do is fall, and allow yourself to feel the wind charging past you
>you close your eyes and pray for this all to stop
>you try and muster up words, but you can't
>you try talking at all
>you move your hands over your mouth and feel nothing
>you attempt to feel anywhere and feel a projector in place of what was your head
>you look down at yourself and find a repulsive human body
>cavaties are exposed all throughout your body, and you can see motors and other mechanical parts shooting out of it
>your skin is a bleak gray, and this is when you find yourself completley disgusted
>you wish someone would fall out of the sky and kill you now
>you thud against the ground, and you see blood and gears go flying out of your exposed parts
>you slowly pick yourself back up off the ground
>with your heavy breathing, you hear machinery moving along at the same pace within you
>you try walking, but you stumble with every step
>walking into the vast void, you can only pray to die
>up behind you, you start to hear footsteps
>your lenses focus in behind you, and you see a figure approaching you
>you start to panic
>immediatley you jump into an attempted run, but instead you feel your motors overheating
>your lense starts to fill with a red filter, and you try and keep running
>you hear the footsteps getting closer
>you look down at yourself and see bolts jolting and moving desperatley to keep you alive
>in a frenzy you try and pick up the pace
>your vision becomes filled more with blood-red
>the footsteps get closer and closer
>you try and scream
>you hear combustion in your body
>you have no head
>you trip and fall over on yourself
>you have no mouth
>the footsteps stop behind you, and all you can do is see who was following you
>you have no head
>a sea of red is covering you vision to the point of blindness
>you wish you could scream
>"...I'm coming for you..."

BEGIN DAY 2
>"Dude, wake up!"
>you feel hands gripping your shoulders and shaking you
>your eyes shoot open and you see none other than Danielle
>she's sitting on your legs with a look of concern
>"Are you alright? You were kicking and screaming.."
>was it..? just a dream..?
"Danielle? Is that you?"
>you place a hand on her cheek
>she grabs onto your hand
>"It is. Don't worry. You're awake. You're safe."
>Danielle reaches in for a hug
>you wrap your arms around her and stare at the walls around you
>you can feel her hair brushing up against the side of your face
>this was exactly what you needed; you could really use a hug right now
>your mind was racing
>what just happened?
>who was that in your dream..?
>Danni excuses herself from the hug as she puts her hands on your shoulders
>"Is everything alright? I heard you going physco in here."
>you can clearly see the concern in her eyes, and it's heartwarming to see she cares
>"I mean, it's cool and all if you're really getting into your dreams.."
>she forces a laugh
>"But, I just got really worried."
>you glance down at Danielle's arms on your shoulders
>you follow them back to her body where you see she's already dressed herself for the day
>she's wearing a teal frock with a black bow
>you also spot some black tights and slippers to accompany her frock
>you make way up to her head where you see she's wearing a beanie as well
>for what it's worth, she really knows how to make herself look good
>"Is anyone there?"
>Danielle attempts to snap her fingers in front of your face to get your attention
"Yeah, just, I, I'm sorry."
>a lot of shit just happened, Kir
>you're going to need a moment to sort everything out
>Danielle offers a smile
>"Hey, don't worry about it."
>you can't help but find comfort in her attempt to console you
>"Listen, I made us some breakfast. I think it's pretty fucking sweet, even Sandwich agrees!"
>even Sandwich?
>is this a dream too?
"Wait, what? Did Sandwich..?"
>"No, you dunce. I put some in his bowl. Here, come with me."
>Danielle grabs your arm and pulls you out of bed
>she guides you through your hall and ventures down to the kitchen
"But, I didn't even clean the stove, yet. How did you..?"
>Danielle laughs
>"You know, you ask too many questions. I cleaned up for you, don't sweat it."
"You didn't have to, you know."
>Danielle stops dead in her tracks and looks back to you
>"And why is that?"
>immediatley you shoot your hands up in a defensive position
"No, no. I didn't mean that you were incapable of it, I just meant it was really nice. Too nice."
>Danielle's glare turns into a content smile
>"Here, let's grab some food."
>walking into the kitchen, you see two bowls prepared on the countertop
"Is it cereal?"
>you peer over the bowls and begin to investigate
>"Oh man, I wish!"
>you discover that each bowl contains one fried egg and small potatoe wedges dotting the perimeter of the eggs
"Wow, how did you do this?"
>"I was watching the cooking channel this morning. Pretty sweet, huh?"
>Danielle throws her arms onto her hips and smiles
>you can't help yourself
>your mouth waters over how delicious the food looks
"So, uh, should we eat?"
>"I dunno, do you always eat your breakfast in your underwear?"
>oh_fuck.bmp
>you glance at yourself and realize you still haven't gotten yourself dressed
>you attempt to cover yourself in front of Danielle, clearly embarassed, and at this point, clearly blushing
>Danielle giggles
"Yeah, I'll be a moment."
>"Hurry up, or else I'll give your bowl to Sandwich."
>---
>breakfast with Danielle is starting to be an honor
>although, you feel guilty for not having your attention completely focused on her and her meal set before you
>you can't help but remind yourself of the stalkers you now face
>looking out for yourself was already a task in it's own
>now with Danielle under your roof, this only creates more stress to bear
>the sensation of chocolate puffs being shot against your face brings you back to reality
>looking ahead of you, you see Danni having the laugh of a lifetime
>if you can't be in a good mood, you can at least take pleasure in seeing her smile
>"Are you gonna eat your food or what? I'll eat it for you!"
>Danni takes pride in that final sentence as she folds her arms and flashes her teeth
"No need for it, I can finish this myself."
>you place your hand up in a calm rebuttal and offer a smile in return for her offer