HelNUTT's first post

Among the oncoming mutants entering the city, a 9ft tall rotund centaur could be seen trotting towards the city's gate, his wide girth demanding a large berth. The fellow was of a dirty light tone, like stained sheets. His skin that had a rough, near grainy texture rolled up into folds of fat that came down his chins to his waist. His lower half was not equine, but bovine in nature, the stout frame that reached 5ft on it's own looked like it could bear his massive weight and more. Of note was that his lower half was not mismatched like that of the typical mythical centaur, but covered in yet more of his regular skin. Additionally, his four legs end not in hooves, but four pudgy human feet housed in shoes that barely fit them. A patchwork of misshapen sheet metal and cloth armor the lower half's flanks, though its shoddy construction told that it was there more for the sake of modesty than the protection offered.

Arriving at the gates, the obese centaur hailed the guards perched atop the somewhat rusted walls with a friendly smile, patting his bare chest. Though it was a question if it came off as friendly as the centaur thought it did. "Name's Helmut! Came to find Mocking and hunt a nasty beastie," he proclaimed loudly, gesturing to the weapon resting on his shoulder: A large steel rod that looked to be reforged from a street sign or two. An axe head was at the tip of it, a distorted "P" from a stop sign visible on the face of the uneven and blunt blade.
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The groups have slowly but surely began to scatter, either to more private corners of the city to discuss strategies or straight to the gates in order to gain a head start. At this point Monch got a better look at his team: the broken record of a leech, a sausage on legs, and a furred ant colony. Hm. He stretched an arm to the centaur, stating "Hello. I'm Monch" which may have been a tad awkward, seeing as he preferred to stay crouched
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The rotund centaur regarded the three with a keen eye: A dirty furball, a growling leech, and a lipless chap. The grumble in Helmut's gut told him that these must all be good people that would never take advantage of him! He's had this feeling multiple times in the past, and he was almost never always wrong. That might as well have meant he was never wrong in his books, since people have their reasons at the end of the day.

The centaur gave a good-humored laugh as he bent his knees to accommodate Monch's preferences, his plump palm enveloping the other's hand in a firm grip before giving a hearty shake. "M'name's Helmut. She yer ladyfriend?" he asked, sending a nod Mumbi's way.
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Having his handshake reciprocated made Monch surge with confidence, having finally a decently friendly reply from someone. He answered "Happy to meetcha, deli- Helmut!" before looking to his leech companion. Well she is a lady, and a companions seems close enough to a friend, so... "... Yes!" he clarified joyfully. He gave a brief look at the scared one, before addressing Helmut again "Can she talk?" due to experience with Mumbi resembling this situation.
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   Even as the mass of ants bit and explored over the vast expanse that was Helmut's body, their presence went unnoticed by him, the coarse sandpaper-like skin too thick for the mandibles of the fire ants to bite through. This wouldn't remain the case if one of them eventually ended up going somewhere more sensitive, of course. Helmut shuffled to the left in response to Monch's question, turning his head behind to take a look at the weight that was on his backside. "Can't say," he stated, with an amused flavor to his voice. "Do ya, girlie?"
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"Aye, y'heard right," the centaur answered, his tone proud. "You speak with Helmut Lehmann, loyal vassal to one of the great lords of the Lower Hive. M'here on my own business today, returning a favor with some nasty beasties," he explained, intentionally leaving the name of his lord, Eluctor’Sulrollod, unsaid. It was a title that still had many ill feelings tied to it, and he was not foolish enough to openly declare his allegiance.

To Monch's suggestions, Helmut offered a nod. He didn't have a problem with sharing another's burden. As for Mumbi's unintelligible speech, Helmut's gut rumbled. His gut was telling him that Mumbi was probably a mute. Probably deaf too, he surmised, since not being able to hear herself would explain why she kept making that unpleasant noise.
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Helmut's quadrupedal nature combined with his strength and regeneration mutations gave him a great endurance for long distance travel. One to three hours of walking didn't do much to phase him. Which was good, seeing as how most means of transportation wouldn't be able to accommodate him. In fact, the portly centaur still had the energy to enjoy himself, taking in the sights and smells of the wild with a deep breath, a grin standing at the top of a stack of chins.

The centaur's heavy footsteps left deep impressions in the ground, every movement bringing a jiggle to his rotund belly and the thin sheets of metal adorning his back. Although Helmut was a little dissatisfied with the criticisms, he dismissed it with a quiet chuckle. Since he couldn't utter the name of his lord, the best he could do was to show off the strength gifted to him, and the opportunity for that has yet to come. "What 'bout you two? Anything to do outside of fillin' your stomachs? Aint nothing wrong with it, I just want to do more with myself."
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Helmut met the arrival of the shotgun caper and subsequent death of the wounded mutant with a furious stamping of his boots, his hand gripped tightly on the stop sign poleaxe. He steadied a harsh glare at the mono-eyed mutant, prepared to charge ahead and crush him under his tremendous weight as swiftly as possible should the mutant turn his aggression on their group. Helmut had just gotten started talking to this group, how could he allow them to be broken so soon?

That was up until the shotgun caper explained himself, of course. He just felt silly then; How could a gentleman like this go around killing others indiscriminately before the quarry was even found? He must have had a good reason! Unfortunately, before Helmut could return the well wishes and apologize for his hostility, the mono-eyed mutant had already taken off.

With the culprit gone, Helmut was surprised to find the little growler sucking the freshly departed corpse into a mummy. He knew those that shared similar habits in the other vassals of his lord, so he wasn't put off by it, but to do so openly? "Not shy at all, huh?" the centaur remarked dryly.

He proceeded to stand over the shriveled with a cupped hand, speaking something of a prayer. "Thanks for dying and giving your body to Monch's ladyfriend. Rest well."
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The obese centaur followed along, slapping away leafy vegetation. He gave a generous nod at Monch's proficient analysis. "Nice sniffer," Helmut praised, thinking that this must be the skill this toothy friend relied on to survive.

For the corpse Monch decided to feed on, Helmut took the same action once more, offering a prayer. "Thanks fer kicking them buckets and treating Monch's tummy real nice. Rest well."
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"Aye, I'd be happy to join ye," Helmut answered, sending his plump belly shaking with a resounding slap. The sturdy body his master gifted him had a strong vitality that did not wear so easily with just travel, so he could stand staying awake for a few more hours without much trouble. Of course, Helmut's body required quite an amount of sustenance to fuel such activity, whatever rations he'd brought with him already brought to the verge depletion over the course of the day.

Rather than sleep, taking this chance to get to know Monch who had proven himself to be one of the more sociable members of their group a bit better ranked higher on Helmut's priority list. The ground beneath trembled lightly as Helmut bent his knees, allowing his mass to rest against the forest floor next to Monch. "Ye familiar with the nasty beasties that call these parts home?" Helmut asked in genuine curiosity.
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Helmut sighed after he realized Monch had meant for them to take separate shifts, his would-be conversational partner falling asleep while he considered what subjects might best foster fellowship. Still, the centaur took his role seriously despite the disappointment, diligently keeping watch over their group. He nearly woke their group on several occasions as the spiritless teams of fellow competitors exited the forest, though his reluctance to disturb his companion's sleep won out each time.

Seeing no team with the prey in tow, even Helmut could guess that some unexpected event transpired. With nothing else to do, the centaur could only take guesses at what happened in the forest earlier. Perhaps the expedition's quarry exhibited a stronger ability than expected, forcing all these teams to give up? Maybe more than just the mono-eyed mutant's group had scores to settle, allowing the beastie to escape in the confusion of the crossfire? Heck, maybe an unrelated third party came and stole it. Helmut didn't know, but he guessed that their slapped together team didn't stand much of a chance succeeding where others have failed. With thoughts like those, Helmut eventually switched shifts with Monch, the obese centaur immediately falling into a soft snore where he sat, a few pained grunts escaping him after a few of the wandering ants made their way into his nasal cavity and ear canals over the course of the night.

Come daybreak, the centaur roused from sleep nosily, his subdued snoring turning into a flustered complaint as he flailed his arms in defense against bright offender in the sky. After taking a moment to collect himself and nodding to Mumbi's mouth noises as if he understood, Helmut naturally didn't decide to keep what he had seen last night to himself. "Lots o' groups got sent packing while y'all were out. I reckon whatever happened out there already happened, aint nothing left for us but table scraps. It's been fun, but I think we're gonna have'ta give up on this one," he said gloomily, tugging at the nonexistent collar of debt tightening around his 7 layered neck.
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