Movie Fone, Coke Pone

>"Crunch, crunch, crunch."
>You set your lips into a thin line and focus on the movie screen.
>"Crunch, crunch, crunch."
>Your fingers dig into the arms of the chair.
>"Crunch, crunch, crunch!"
>If this fucking coke pone crunches that fucking ice one more fucking ti-
>"CRUNCH, CRUNCH, CRUNCH!"
>You leap from your seat and glare at her.
"What the FUCK are you doing!?"
>She flinches away from you.
>"E-enjoying the movie?"
"Oh, really?"
>You throw your hands out wide and strut around in a circle.
"I wonder if anyone else here would like to enjoy the movie."
>Off in the darkness, you hear someone shout at you.
>"Sit down!"
>Fuck that.
>You point a finger in the direction the voice came from.
"Shut the fuck up! I'm making a point."
>Turning back to the coke pony, you sigh.
"Look, I'm not a bad guy, I just want to watch the movie. So either you keep it down or you'll regret it."
>She nods and you sit back down in your seat.
>It's easy to get back into the movie, and the climax is fast approaching.
>You lean forward in your seat and watch with barely contained anticipation.
>The lead stallion pulls the villain close and says
>"Sorry about this old chum, but I need t-CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH!"
>Oh, that is fucking it.
>Jumping back to your feet, you grab the coke pony by the neck
"NOW YOU FUCKED UP!"
>She stares at you with terror in her eyes.
"YOU HAVE FUCKED UP NOW!"
>And you throttle her, right in the middle of the theater.
>She gags violently for several seconds before...
*KABOOSH!*
>You are quickly escorted out of the theater.
>Covered in soda suds.
>Fucking. Coke. Ponies.