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- I used to be afraid of peeing in public restrooms because when I was 11 a kid using the urinal next to me told me that I peed like I had a small dick. Now when I use a urinal I make a big show out of struggling to hold my junk in place while peeing and I pour a bottle of water into the toilet so that it sounds like I have a heavy flow. Nobody says anything, but I can tell they’re all impressed.
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