Anon Tried to Kill Himself - Act II

ACT II: The Time is Coming When Betas Will Decide the Fate of Us All
Part 1: Sombra Fucking Loves Tendies

>the grey stallion shouts at his elderly companion
>"I DEMAND THE TENDIES THAT ARE RIGHTFULLY MINE"
>the old mare tut-tuts in reply
>"Now Sombra, darling. You know that crystal tenders are ten good boy points, not five."
>"LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE CRYSTAL TENDIES IS WHAT I DESIRE"
>"Sombra, sweetheart, you're making a scene. Let's get back home and I'll make you some haygel bites."
>grumbling about grave insults and scowling, Sombra lowers his head and follows his mother quietly
>goodness fucking gracious
>that poor, poor mother
>Twilight shoves you with her hoof
>"Anon, get behind me!"
"Wh-why?"
>"Do it!"
>without checking to see if you obeyed her order, the princess of friendship stretches her wings, tearing the flimsy raincoat from her body
>her horn glows an increasingly brilliant purple
>"King Sombra! You are not welcome in this land!"
>holy fucking niggers
>she's going to murder that autistic pony
>you should do something about this
>"T-Twilight! Is that you?"
>seemingly out of nowhere, a pink princess pony puts her hoof on Twilight's shoulder with a nervous smile
>"Cadance, what are you doing? That's King Sombra!"
>"Y-yeah, that's him all right. He's been back for a couple weeks now."
>"A couple weeks? How come there hasn't been any news about this?"
>Cadance looks between Twilight and Sombra a few times
>"He's… not really doing anything newsworthy is he?"
>Twilight looks between Cadance and Sombra a few times
>he's just standing there scowling
>her horn stops glowing
>"I-I guess not."
>"Well, why don't you and your friend here come visit for dinner in the castle? I'll explain everything there."
>Cadance calls out across the street
>"Oh, Bismuth, would you and your son care to join me and Princess Twilight for dinner?"
>"Why, that would be lovely! Sombra, come along now. We're going to eat with the princesses."
>all of Sombra's rage dissipates and he timidly shuffles behind his mother across the street toward you
>Twilight looks to you, evidently distressed
>"Is this what the map sent us here for? What's going on?"
>you shrug, grunt, and follow the group toward a crystal castle that's arguably uglier than the one you've been living in for the past week

Part 2: A Shitty Fucking Evening

>you don't know how the fuck this happened
>this is the second royal banquet hall in which you've sat down to a meal
>you feel fancy as hell
>you're pulled out of this thought when you hear someone reference you
>"Hey, Twily! You didn't say you were coming over. Who's your friend?"
>"Oh, um, Anon? He's just, uh, you know."
>the stocky, blue-haired chad pony apparently doesn't know
>he stares at Twilight to get her to make him know until it becomes apparent that she's unwilling to elaborate any further
>thanks for the glowing introduction, you purple bastard
>"Okay then. Well, Anon, I'm Shining Armor. Twilight's brother. It's nice to meet you."
>you intended to say something that didn't sound severely socially retarded
"Y-you too."
>but it just didn't come out that way
>fortunately, the important folks have much more important things to discuss as dinner is brought out on platters
>oh boy, various grasses and flowers
>de-fucking-licious
>Twilight is anxious to get down to business right away
>"So Cadance, care to explain why he's here?"
>in obvious reference to Sombra
>"He showed up a couple of weeks ago. We were going to banish him to the frozen wastes, but his mother pleaded with us to let him stay. He doesn't seem to have his dark powers anymore, so we put him on a sort of probation."
>"Cadance, that stallion is a war-criminal and a despot! Dark powers or not, he's too dangerous to just be let loose on the Crystal Empire."
>Sombra's mother butts in
>"He's a good boy! He's just always had a hard time ever since his father and I broke up. Conquering the Crystal Empire was just a cry for help!"
>she's talking about a grown ass adult like he's a little boy
>Sombra himself doesn't seem to care about the apparent slight, busying himself with the arrangement of the blue flower petals on his plate
>Cadance puts out another case for Sombra
>"Twilight, don't be so quick to judge Sombra. It's my understanding that you're good friends with at least one war criminal and attempted despot yourself."
>"W-well, Discord is more Fluttershy's friend than mine…"
>fucking Discord
>what kind of cuck nation lets multiple would-be-conquerers walk around free within its borders?
>aw shit they're bringing out the deserts now
>it looks like something you can digest this time
>brownies next to hot coacoa
>awww yeeee
>the princesses continue their discussion, ignoring the bountiful cache laid out on the table
>only you and Sombra go to grab any
>unfortunately, your hand finds its way onto one brownie that Sombra has already magic'd
>"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
>you don't fucking know how this happened
>you're under heavy fire from brownie projectiles
>general quarters, general quarters, all hands man your battle stations
>warning status: red
>you're normally too much of a beta pushover to get mad
>but this is too fucking much
>you attempt to beat the shit out of the little shit
>perhaps fortunately for you, you find yourself whisked away to another room in a bright flash of purple
>Twilight is glaring daggers at you
>"ANON"
>time to get bitched at, son

Part 3: What I Learned in Friendship School

>"ANON"
>your resolve vanishes at the prospect of a stern talking to
>you shake and shudder and simply stare in response
>"YOU CAN'T GO AROUND ASSAULTING PONIES"
"H-h-h-h-h-h-hhe threw brownies and hot coacoa at me though…"
>"THAT'S… THAT'S…"
>"Look, Anon. I really think this is what the map sent us up here for. It would just mean so much to me if you just helped me help Sombra here."
>how are you supposed to help the bastard?
>you're barely more adjusted than he is
"What can I possibly do to help him?"
>Twilight is momentarily stumped
>she magics up a pen and parchment
>"I know you're not very far along yet, but I think it would be really helpful to Sombra if he could get some advice from another junior student in friendship."
>junior student in friendship?
>goodness fucking gracious
"Advice?"
>"Yeah. Just write down what you've learned this week."
>you haven't learned anything
>after an awkward pause, she places the pen into your hand
>"You must have learned something, Anon. Here, let me start it for you."
>she magics your hand and the pen within and begins reciting what she's writing
>"Dear Princess Twilight, this week I learned…"
>she admires her handiwork for a second and giggles
>"There. I'm gonna go apologize to Cadance for you. I'll be back in a bit when you're done."
>oh fuck
>alone with nothing but this awful task, you panic a little and start talking to yourself
"Okay."
"Okay."
"What the fuck did I learn?"
>…
>inspiration strikes you
"That's fukken it, son."
>and you compose what must be, in your humble opinion, your most masterful shitpost ever

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"Done."
>"R-really?"
"Yep."
>she seems disappointed
>"Are you sure? I have some good writing tips for you."
"It's done."
>"Okay then, let's see what you've got so far."
>she reads the opening line with a great big smile
>"Dear Princess Twilight, this week I learned…"
>and her face transforms into one that grows increasingly frustrated
>"The fat chicks really do eat dick the best…"
>"The disadvantages of not having a coat of fur…"
>"That, no matter how hard you try to be friends with someone, there will always be a… chad?… to fuck everything up…"
>"That… sloots love… gloots…"
>"And that some people aren't good at anything and should probably just not even try…"
>the paper whips into the floor
>she looks pissed
>"ANON!"
>you are 'abbin the giggle of your life right now
>"This isn't funny!"
>you clearly think it's pretty funny
>even after the paper slaps into your face multiple times
>"Anon, this is important! I'm sure Sombra is the reason why the map sent us here, and I know it picked you to come for a reason!"
>the genuine frustration beats you back into beta mode, and you pay attention
>"Look, Anon, I know you're not quite a social butterfly like the rest of us"
>damn son
>"But you don't seem to want to hurt yourself anymore."
>"So, as per our agreement, I can release you from your servitude."
>AW SHIT NIGGA
>"You won't have to live in the castle, you can have your tent back, and I won't be constantly breathing down your neck anymore."
>fuckin nice, son
>"You will, of course, receive visits from me on a semi-weekly basis. To make sure you're doing okay and to continue your education in friendship."
>i-it's still a better deal than what you've got now
>"But first"
>shit
>"You have to help me with Sombra."
"But how will we know when we're done?"
>Twilight waves her ass in your face like it's a perfectly normal thing to do
>When this"
>she touches the purple star on her butt
>"starts flashing again, we'll know we're done here."
>you take it all in for a moment
>"You don't have to have that paper written up today, but you do need to have it done, and you will interact with Sombra until we're done here."
"And then I'm free?"
>"And then you're free. Good night, Anon."
>she leaves
>a yellow pegasus pony wearing crystal armor walks in and gives you a face somewhere between a friendly smile and a superior smirk
>"Let me show you to your room, sir."

Part 4: Anon Makes a New Buddy (Anon Really Fucking Hates Flash Sentry)

"S-sure."
>"All right, right this way, buddy."
>>buddy
>the walk through the castle goes more or less quietly
>you really, really hope this guy doesn't have anything to say to you
>"So I heard you tried to off yourself, buddy."
>what the fuck
>you're a hopeless autist, and even you're pretty damn sure you don't say that kind of thing
"Wh-what?"
>"You know, buddy, when you grab the rope and you tie it off and you do the ol' 'look-ma-no-hooves' dance up in the air."
>holy shitlicking fucking jewniggers
>shut the fuck up
"U-uh…"
>"Don't wanna talk about it, huh? Yeah, man, I feel you, buddy. Some of my best friends tried it too. Can't really blame 'em, you know? We lost some real good stallions in the Battle of Canterlot, and that kind of thing messes with a guy, you know."
>goodness fuck that's some heavy shit
"So why'd you do it, buddy? Were you in some kinda war when you were back at home or something?"
>because you were lonely
>because nobody liked you
>because tfw no gf
>fucking shit that all sounds so fucking trivial in comparison to what he just told you
>how the fuck do you even respond?
"Uh…"
>"Ah, and here's your room right here, buddy. Your stuff should already be in there. Have a good night, buddy."
>>buddy
>he turns away and begins to canter off down the passageway
>you turn to face him with your response
"Y-you too."
>he doesn't seem to hear
>you hastily turn back toward your room
>but you turn too fast, and your feet get caught in one another
>it's too late, you're going down
>you hit the crystal floor hard
>in seemingly an instant, your armored traveling companion is at your side
>"Oh, gotta be careful with this crystal floor, it sure can be slippery. Need some help, buddy?"
>you hastily prop yourself up on your hands
"Nono, I'm good. It wasn't the floor being slippery anyway, it was just-"
>your hand slips on the smooth crystal surface, and you're treated to another face-fuck from the floor
>it doesn't even matter anymore
>you've half a mind to just sleep there for the night
>on the cold, crystal floor
>kept warm in a nest of your own spaghetti

Part 5: A War is Declared

>you ended up not sleeping on the floor
>somehow you managed to get to your bed
>and now, with sunlight filtering through the incredibly impractical crystal walls, you wake up
>you feel itchy
>you slowly sit up in your bed and scratch at your face
>ngah, fuck, that makes it worse
>this can't fucking be good
>did you leave your door open last night?
>you always close the door when you enter a bedroom
>why the fuck is that door open then?
>Twilight's voice assaults your ears from a distance
>"Anooon! Are you getting up? There's breakfast down here!"
"What is it?"
>"Pancakes!"
"Again?"
>"Get down here!"
>all right; this shouldn't be a problem
>just don't scratch yourself
>you throw the sheets off and force yourself to stand on the floor
>you never bothered undressing last night, so you simply head out the door
>where the hell do you even go?
>this castle is fucking huge
>"Anooooon!"
>that way, you decide to go that way
>your keen listening is rewarded with a set of sparkling stairs
>you step onto the stairs, and suddenly the rubbing of your clothing against your body reminds you that you're fucking itchy
>it takes a mighty effort to resist the need to scratch yourself, but you manage
>mostly
>or, mostly not
>by the time you reach the foot of the stairs, the itching is replaced with a sort of pleasant pain that only ten anxious fingernails can bring
>from the base of the stairs it's a straight path to a dining chamber, where Twilight and the others from last night are waiting for you
>Twilight approaches you
>"Anon, there you are. You look… red. Moreso than usual."
"Well I wouldn't look fucking green, now would I?"
>"Are you sure you're all right?"
>that autistic grey pony who's apparently the reason you're here speaks up
>"Maybe he's got scabies!"
>that's an oddly specific diagnosis to be making from fifty feet away
>Twilight cocks her head
>"Scabies? No, it's probably just-"
>Twilight's purple magic skims your skin and brings some sort of speck up to her eye
>"Sarcoptes scabiei. It is scabies! Anon, how did this happen? You bathe regularly, right?"
"Of course! My last shower was only…"
>oh fuck
>it has been a good spell, hasn't it?
>maybe not since you lived on Earth
>but still
>"Anon!"
"No, no no, no! There's no way…"
>the open door
>the uncanny diagnosis
>it reeks of foul play
>you point to the austistic pony
"He did this!"
>he touches his hoof to his chin and smiles
>Twilight isn't convinced
>"Anon! Sombra absolutely did not give you scabies! This sort of thing doesn't happen with proper hygiene! Anon, you're filthy!"
>the pink princess pony speaks up
>"Twilight, the castle has bathing rooms. Feel free to take your friend to one of them."
>you feel like you're going to try to kill yourself again
>Twilight is visibly embarrassed by the offer too
>"Thank you, Cadance. I'll do that right now."
>Twilight's horn purples and grabs your ear
>and as she drags you off, all you can see is Sombra
>smiling at you
>smugly

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>"Strip."
"Wh-what?"
>"Strip!"
"I can bathe myself, you fucking horse!"
>Twilight magically grabs your shirt and yanks upwards on it
>"Apparently not!"
"No, seriously, fuck off, I need privacy for this!"
>"Nope! You humiliated me; now I'm gonna humiliate you!"
>she mad
>Twilight grabs your arms and forces them up
>the shirt slides over your head and you're topless
"Oh, come on! You can't possibly-"
>"Last time I checked, you were still my vassal, and you were still bound to do everything I say!"
"B-but that was just-"
>your pants glow purple, and they begin to try to jerk downwards
"No, fucking stop!"
>Twilight finally manages to yank your pants down
>after they've fallen to your ankles, she yanks them to the side
>the pants come free, knocking your shoes off with them and sending you tumbling to the floor in prone position
>you were never issued underpants, so Twilight is treated to a big faceful of ass
>Twilight whacks your butt with her hoof to knock it away from her
>it falls to the floor with the rest of you, and roll over onto your back and groan
>"Get in the tub."
>somehow you don't feel like resisting any more
>you crawl over to the tub, climb over the edge, and collapse into the lukewarm water
>"Eeeew! Anon, the water is turning brown already!"
>bullshit
>it definitely looks more grey than brown
>Twilight grabs your head with her hoof and dunks it under the water
"Do that again, please. Only hold it there this time."
>Twilight's uses her hoof to smack the back of your head
>"Don't joke like that!"
>it's funny that she assumes it was a joke
>your scalp is bombarded with a sudden glop of cold, liquid soap
>and you're quickly dunked under the water again
>"Wait here. I'll be right back."
>it's extra funny that you have no memory of almost dying at any point until you tried to kill yourself last week
>because you're sure that you must have died at some point
>because Equestria is obviously some sort of hell
>"Here it is. Bend over, Anon."
>you see Twilight holding a very thickly-bristled scrubbing brush
"Wh-whatever happened to friendship and all that?"
>"Sometimes friendship is tough love, pal."
>the brush is applied to your back
>and somewhere, in the maelstrom of pain inflicted by it, a thought forms
>the thought?
>you're gonna fucking get Sombra back for this shit

Part 6: Anon Shares a Friendship Lesson

>"Hey Anon, why don't you tell Sombra something you learned this week?"
>you, Twilight, and Sombra are all walking through some sort of park
>it's a moderately-sized patch of green grass, dotted with giant, pastel crystals that cast colorful shadows in the afternoon sun
>a few translucent ponies can be seen sparsely spread across the park, enjoying a midday stroll with family, friends, and lovers
>from where you tread on the simple yet clean dirt path, you can see the  city - empire, whatever - to your right
>to your left, whatever artificial weather magic these crystal horses have ends, and you can see out into miles and miles of frozen tundra
>you've been preparing for a question just like this ever since Twilight violated you this morning
>this is your chance to strike back at the autistic menace
"Just be yourself :)"
>hot damn
>you could actually feel the smiley face rolling off of your tongue
>Twilight beams at you
>"That's great advice, Anon. I didn't realize you were on to such advanced friendship principles!"
>perfect
>she doesn't suspect a thing
>Sombra looks confused
>"Be... myself?"
>Twilight nods and points to a mother with her daughter walking toward the three of you
>"That's right. Try saying hello to those two. Remember, just be yourself."
>oh shit
>you didn't intend to traumatize any baby horses with this
>it's too late to stop it now
>Sombra touches his chin and mumbles
>"Be... myself..."
>he puts his hoof on the ground, puts his chin up high, and strides authoritatively over to the approaching pair
>the little horse sees him coming and clings to the mother horse
>the mother horse stops and tries to comfort her child
>"It's all right, sweetheart. The princess says he's okay now. Don't be rude now."
>then Sombra arrives
>and he arrives really fucking close
>he stops and stares for a minute
>then, he leans forward and sniffs the mother's hair
>the poor thing is actually shuddering harder than her daughter at this point
>and then he says it
>"Griiiiizzzdal zzzzlaaaaaaaves..."
>the crystal horses jump so high into the air that you can actually see the sun shining through them
>they hit the ground running and fucking book it back into the city
>Twilight runs over to Sombra, who appears thoroughly perplexed
>"Sombra, why the hell did you do that?!"
>it's too much
>your sides fly off of your body and detonate over Moscow
>you're crying with laughter
"He was just being himself, Twilight!"
>"What?!"
"He was just being himself!"
>and through the tears of mirth that obscure your vision
>you can see him
>Sombra
>he's glowering at you
>and his eyes flash green and purple

Part 7: Anon is Unusually Candid

>you hold open the door for Twilight, still chuckling
>Twilight passes into the castle, Sombra close behind
>Sombra disappears around a corridor, fuming
>Twilight stops in the vestibule to wait for you
>you let go of the door and look at her, wondering what she wants
>"Anon, I don't understand why you'd try to trick Sombra like that."
>ah, so she's upset about that number
>she scratches her head
>"Furthermore, I don't understand why you'd use good advice to do it."
>you scoff
"What? 'Bee you'reself?'"
>"Yeah. How is that a trick? It was one of the first and most important friendship lessons I ever learned."
>you scoff again, louder this time
"And that, your highness, is why you don't get it. That's why you haven't fixed me and why you won't be able to fix Sombra either."
>"Anon, 'fix'? I never said you were broken."
"Exactly. I'm not broken. Neither is Sombra. We're both exactly the way we were made."
>"What are you trying to say?"
"I'm saying that for some people, "just be yourself" is bad advice. For someone like me, "myself" is not the sort of person anyone wants to associate with. Believe it or not, unpleasant people don't make friends."
>Twilight pauses
>and she thinks
>and she responds
>"Anon, I don't believe a word of what you're saying. I don't think you believe a word of what you're saying! You're not an unpleasant person, and I don't think Sombra has to be either."
"Oh, come on. Even you tried to get rid of me. You tried to dump me off in bug-eyed not-human land on day one."
>"Anon, that was, that was… Anon, you're being-"
"Unpleasant?"
>she sighs
>she looks down
>"Unusually candid."
>now it's your turn to pause
>yeah, this conversation wouldn't have been possible at the beginning of last week
>the "you" you'd come to know would have simply stood mostly silently
>he'd have given terse, one-word replies designed to give Twilight what she wanted and end the conversation as quickly as possible
>schadenfreude overcomes you as you realize what you're doing
"Exactly. Just being myself."
>Twilight's head jerks
>she scrunches her face and glares at you
>then she does a prompt about-face
>"This conversation isn't over, Anon."
>and she walks out into the corridor
>"I'll be in the library if you need me."
>and she disappears around the corner

Part 8: Anon's Stressful Night

>whatever
>it's never too early to go to bed
>you wish fucking Twilight Sparkle had never bothered with you in the first place
>at the very least, you wouldn't be here right now
>you trudge up the nearest staircase
>upon reaching the appropriate floor, you take the appropriate turn
>"Uh, hey."
>you turn to see who's speaking to you
>it's Twilight's brother, sitting at a desk in a sort of office with the door open
"Uh, hey."
>"What's Twily so mad about?"
>the floor suddenly becomes very interesting, like a magnet for your eyes
"I, uh, I dunno."
>"Oh, well, uh. Okay. I sure do hate seeing her like that. You sure you don't know?"
"I dunno."
>"Right. Well, if you see her, be sure to ask. When I asked, she wouldn't tell me."
"Sure."
>"All right. Have a good day then, Mr., uh, Nonermus."
"You too."
>the door to the office glows blue and closes
>Twilight said she was in the library…
>you could maybe go see if there was anything you could say
>or you could not do that and just sleep the shitty day away.
>sleep sounds better to be honest
>you trudge over to the room you were given
>and you make your way over to the bed you were given
>and you collapse
>and you pass out

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>and you wake up
>you're on fucking fire lad
>your eyes shoot wide open in reaction to extreme pain
>big mistake
>boiling hot water streams off of your face into your eyes
>you quickly bolt your eyes shut and make to wipe as much of the steaming liquid off of you as you can
>after rolling around for a bit, your body finds its way off of the edge of the bed and onto the floor
>the ringing in your ears dissipates after what feels like hours
>your brain starts thinking after what feels like days
>you chance to crack your eyes open
>before you stands Sombra, holding a steaming pot in a field of blood red magic
>he's not even smiling
>he's just staring at you, simmering and glaring
>you don't even need to think about what you're going to do next
"All right that's it you little shit."
>you charge your assailant, arms stretched out wide
>the impact happens before he can react, and sends you both tumbling to the floor
>you land on top of him and waste no time in pummeling his face to the best of your skinny arms' abilities
>of course, hooves at the end of thick forelegs can do a bit more damage
>Sombra's collide into your sides and you fall off of him
>he springs to his hooves and stands over you
>his horn glows that blood red color
>he closes his eyes hard, and his magic starts to expel black bubbles and transition into a greenish color
>his horn slowly appears to darken from the onyx color of his coat
>geez-o-fuck, no
>you pull your legs in
>the door to your room opens
>you kick into Sombra as hard as your panicking, enraged body can manage
>a female voice from the hallway
>"Anon, what is going on in-"
>it's a hell of a kick
>Sombra goes flying
>the sound of a sprawling impact resonates throughout the castle
>you slowly rise to your feet, conscious of blood and pus running down your cheek
>Sombra jumps to his hooves and runs in your direction, his horn lowered to point straight forward
>you note in a moment that his horn is again an ordinary unicorn's horn
>he never makes it to you
>his tail glows purple and yanks him backward
>he slides back into the hall, revealing someone you wanted to see even less right now
>"Anon!"
>wings outstretched and eyes on fire, in storms Princess Twilight Sparkle
>a rivulet of blood flows from her nose to her chin, and finally terminates in a single drop which leaps from her chin to the clean crystal floor below

>"What are you doing, Anon?!"
"Twilight, he-"
>"No, I didn't ask what Sombra was doing. I asked what you were doing."
"Twilight, you don't understand. Look at me, he-"
>"No! I understand perfectly, Anonymous!"
"No, you-"
>"Shut! Up!"
>she magically transforms your lips into a zipper and yanks them shut
>"I understand everything! The rude comments! The constant scowling! The way you don't take anything I say seriously! Your neverending pessimism! How you wake me up at two in the morning by getting into fights!"
>you move to unzip your mouth
>she slaps your hand down with her magic
>"It all makes sense, Anonymous! I understand everything now! I understand that you don't want to be helped!"
>now wait just a fucking minute
>you yank your mouth open and the zipper disappears
"You don't understand a single fucking thing! You're just an idealistic little snob trying to use me as a fucking science experiment to spread your cancerous fucking ideology! You've got your head shoved so far up your sparkly little asshole eating your own shit that you think all this friendship bullshit can actually help anyone! What happened to talking it out? Nope! Because obviously anyone can just up and make friends, whatever the fuck 'friends' are, like a fucking fairytale!"
>a tuft of Twilight's mane actually catches on fire
>"I knew it! I knew it! You don't want help! You don't want a better life! You'd rather stay in that awful tent of yours! You'd rather die in that thing! You'd rather kill yourself!"
>somehow the palm of your hand impacts the side of Twilight's head
>she looks away from you for an instant
>you're perfectly still
>all is silent as she looks directly into your eyes with a perfectly calm, utterly blank expression
>"You know what, Anon? Maybe you're right. Maybe I can't help you. Maybe you're beyond my capabilities to help."
>her face never changes
>you guess that at some point the other princess pony must have arrived, because she calls out from outside the door
>"Twilight? Don't do anything you're going to regret."
>Twilight doesn't look away from you to respond
>"Don't worry, Cadance. I won't. I'm just going to get Anon the help he so desperately needs."
>she takes your wrist hard into her magic
>she leads you into the passageway
>past Sombra, who grins ever so slightly
>down the stairwell
>out the palace door
>"Wait here, Anonymous."
>Twilight goes back inside and slams the door
"Oh, fuck…"
>you lean against the crystal door
>you slide down it til you hit the crystal road
>you put your elbows on your knees and your face in your hands
>centuries pass, and nothing moves
>a clattering and a clopping noise disturbs the stillness
>"Uh, Mr., uh, Nonnermus?"
>you look up
>a pegasus stallion, with glasses, a mustache, a small beard, and a uniform hat looks down at you
>"Transport to Canterlot Mental Hospital."