daddy homes

1
00:01:16,994 --> 00:01:18,485
Brad.

2
00:01:19,037 --> 00:01:20,153
- Bye, Daddy.
- Bye, sweetie.

3
00:01:20,414 --> 00:01:22,326
Bye-bye, guys. I'll pick you up on Monday.

4
00:01:22,708 --> 00:01:23,698
- Brad.
- What's up?

5
00:01:23,834 --> 00:01:24,870
Hey, Brad.

6
00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:27,118
Hey, Brad. Looking good, buddy.

7
00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:32,548
- Dylan, where's your retainer?
- I left it at Dad's.

8
00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:34,379
Hey, where's your math workbook?

9
00:01:34,469 --> 00:01:36,005
At Mom's house.

10
00:01:36,763 --> 00:01:38,504
- Where are all your undies?
- I don't know.

11
00:01:38,849 --> 00:01:40,431
How do we got so many undies?

12
00:01:42,352 --> 00:01:43,559
Happy birthday, buddy!

13
00:01:45,230 --> 00:01:46,220
Brad already got me one.

14
00:01:47,024 --> 00:01:49,687
It was my idea! It was my idea!

15
00:01:51,028 --> 00:01:52,519
Hey, look at that.

16
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:53,774
Guys.

17
00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:55,028
Daddy.

18
00:02:01,705 --> 00:02:02,866
Megan, hold up!

19
00:02:08,378 --> 00:02:09,539
- Are you all right?
- I'm okay.

20
00:02:14,343 --> 00:02:16,505
Right here! Don't leave without it.

21
00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:23,258
Come on! Keep it moving!

22
00:02:23,935 --> 00:02:25,597
Inside the cones!

23
00:02:25,771 --> 00:02:28,559
Inside the cones like an ice cream.
Let's go!

24
00:02:29,191 --> 00:02:30,227
Braddie!

25
00:02:30,359 --> 00:02:31,725
Here you go, buddy.

26
00:02:32,444 --> 00:02:33,480
Thanks, Braddie.

27
00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:34,686
- Hot cocoa?
- Yeah.

28
00:02:34,780 --> 00:02:36,521
Nice. Little marshmallows
floating around there

29
00:02:36,615 --> 00:02:38,652
all in formation.
You are the greatest.

30
00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:40,361
I put a little licorice root
in there, too.

31
00:02:40,619 --> 00:02:41,609
Tell me what you think.

32
00:02:41,745 --> 00:02:42,906
- Hey, guys.
- Daddy!

33
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:45,948
- Hey. Hi, how was your day?
- Good.

34
00:02:46,750 --> 00:02:47,831
All right, guys, hop in.

35
00:02:48,001 --> 00:02:49,993
I'll get them ready and I'll
meet you at Tae Kwon Do.

36
00:02:50,087 --> 00:02:51,919
- See you in 30.
- Great. Looking forward to it.

37
00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:53,496
- Bye.
- Bye, Dad.

38
00:02:55,425 --> 00:02:56,586
- Dusty.
- Yeah?

39
00:02:56,843 --> 00:02:58,630
Sorry. You made treats for tonight, right?

40
00:02:58,762 --> 00:03:00,594
No, I got the gift card.
I thought you were on treats tonight.

41
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:04,015
No. I did gift card and the treats
for the Halloween Spooktacular.

42
00:03:04,309 --> 00:03:05,891
Okay. Well, I guess I'll hit the bakery

43
00:03:05,977 --> 00:03:06,967
- on the way to the pageant.
- Bakery?

44
00:03:07,062 --> 00:03:08,052
Unless you don't want me
to go to the bakery.

45
00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:09,728
- No...
- Usually, when you repeat what I said

46
00:03:09,815 --> 00:03:10,851
and you shake your head up and down,

47
00:03:10,941 --> 00:03:12,148
it really means
you don't want me to do it.

48
00:03:12,234 --> 00:03:13,520
- I'm just thinking...
- What?

49
00:03:13,777 --> 00:03:14,767
Maybe homemade?

50
00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:17,228
Yeah. Hey! Honk at him again,
you better count your teeth!

51
00:03:17,781 --> 00:03:19,488
No problem, Braddie.
Homemade snickerdoodles

52
00:03:19,574 --> 00:03:20,940
coming right up. One for you, too.

53
00:03:21,118 --> 00:03:23,576
Should we fist bump again
or would it be awkward?

54
00:03:23,662 --> 00:03:26,075
I don't mind a second bump. All right.

55
00:03:26,164 --> 00:03:27,405
Thanks, buddy. See you tonight.

56
00:03:27,499 --> 00:03:28,535
Bye, mate. Thanks so much for the cocoa.

57
00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:29,782
- Bye, Daddy.
- Bye, Daddy.

58
00:03:31,253 --> 00:03:32,243
Sorry.

59
00:03:34,673 --> 00:03:35,663
- Bye.
- Bye.

60
00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:37,795
These look great.
Thank you.

61
00:03:38,593 --> 00:03:39,583
Look at that.

62
00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:42,386
- Daddy! Karen!
- Hey! Hey, guys.

63
00:03:43,473 --> 00:03:45,214
Look how sexy Karen looks.

64
00:03:45,809 --> 00:03:47,391
Leather pants and side boob.

65
00:03:47,477 --> 00:03:48,968
That's perfect for a school function.

66
00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:51,805
- Honey, let's expect good things, okay?
- I know, you're right. Right.

67
00:03:51,982 --> 00:03:54,144
- Hey. How's it going?
- Hey.

68
00:03:54,693 --> 00:03:55,683
- Hi.
- Hi.

69
00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:57,852
Look at you guys.

70
00:03:58,155 --> 00:04:00,112
You and Mommy are so sassy all the time.

71
00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:01,234
- Hi.
- Hi.

72
00:04:01,408 --> 00:04:02,569
Hey. I got your novel.

73
00:04:03,452 --> 00:04:05,785
- It's amazing.
- I'm glad you like it.

74
00:04:05,871 --> 00:04:08,033
I don't know how you write
such powerful dialogue.

75
00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:10,156
I mean, it must just
come naturally, right?

76
00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:11,991
- Like everything else.
- You're so sweet.

77
00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:13,166
- Are you guys ready?
- Let's go.

78
00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:15,915
I want my shirt like Adrianna's.

79
00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:18,581
No. No, no, no, honey.
We're not doing that, okay?

80
00:04:18,675 --> 00:04:20,337
Put that back in.
Look like a nice kid.

81
00:04:23,472 --> 00:04:25,805
Welcome to the One Horse Open Sing!

82
00:04:26,183 --> 00:04:28,266
Before we get started,
notice we have

83
00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:31,810
several professional video
and still photographers

84
00:04:31,897 --> 00:04:33,854
to cover all your kids for free.

85
00:04:34,232 --> 00:04:36,394
So you can all put your phones
in your pockets,

86
00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:38,852
relax, and just be in the moment.

87
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:41,897
You don't care.

88
00:04:58,465 --> 00:05:00,457
...eat candy Santas
and smashed potatoes

89
00:05:00,550 --> 00:05:02,633
and dressing up my dog
like a reindeer.

90
00:05:02,761 --> 00:05:04,377
That's what
Christmas means to me.

91
00:05:04,679 --> 00:05:05,669
Thank you.

92
00:05:06,932 --> 00:05:08,719
And now we have Megan Mayron.

93
00:05:10,936 --> 00:05:14,304
My name is Megan Mayron,
and I like Christmas presents a lot.

94
00:05:16,525 --> 00:05:18,391
But I don't really like Christmas.

95
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:20,984
My daddy was at my first Christmases,

96
00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:23,646
but I don't remember those ones.

97
00:05:23,949 --> 00:05:26,111
Then we had some with no daddy at all.

98
00:05:26,952 --> 00:05:27,988
Then Brad came,

99
00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:30,616
but he was always trying way too hard

100
00:05:30,789 --> 00:05:32,906
and making everyone feel uncomfortable.

101
00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:34,574
Then Daddy came back,

102
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,079
and Brad did a pretend Christmas

103
00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:38,081
to show Daddy that Brad
was better than him.

104
00:05:38,755 --> 00:05:42,294
So now we have to go to different houses
to have different Christmases.

105
00:05:42,467 --> 00:05:44,049
Me and my brother wish
we were like other families

106
00:05:44,135 --> 00:05:45,717
and we had normal Christmases.

107
00:05:45,804 --> 00:05:47,261
But we still like our Christmas presents.

108
00:05:47,764 --> 00:05:49,881
I want to be very clear about that.

109
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:51,006
Thank you very much.

110
00:05:55,146 --> 00:05:57,354
Enjoy paying for therapy, boys!

111
00:05:57,524 --> 00:05:58,935
You better shut your mouth, Jerry!

112
00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:00,106
Absolutely, Dusty.

113
00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:04,277
We're messing up our kids,
Brad, and it's on you.

114
00:06:04,948 --> 00:06:06,359
On me? Why is it on me?

115
00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:08,824
Because before you came around
we only had one Christmas.

116
00:06:09,119 --> 00:06:10,405
So it's on you.

117
00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:12,532
Hold on, hold on.
We don't have to circle the wagons

118
00:06:12,622 --> 00:06:14,989
every time one of the kids
expresses a negative emotion.

119
00:06:15,083 --> 00:06:16,073
They're fine.

120
00:06:16,209 --> 00:06:17,325
Kids that get up in front of whole schools

121
00:06:17,419 --> 00:06:19,536
and say they don't like
Christmas aren't fine, Sara.

122
00:06:19,629 --> 00:06:21,837
Well, she said she didn't like
having two Christmases.

123
00:06:21,923 --> 00:06:22,959
Which is on you.

124
00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:26,133
So what if we all spend
a Christmas together?

125
00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:28,211
A Together Christmas. That's good.

126
00:06:28,305 --> 00:06:29,841
Now you fixed it. See, that...

127
00:06:29,931 --> 00:06:31,217
Now it's off of you.

128
00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:32,806
Let's invite Adrianna's dad, too.

129
00:06:32,893 --> 00:06:33,883
- What?
- Yes.

130
00:06:33,977 --> 00:06:35,058
- Are you being serious right now? No.
- Yeah.

131
00:06:35,186 --> 00:06:36,347
Put that hand down.

132
00:06:36,479 --> 00:06:39,472
I've been nothing but nice to that guy,
and he treats me like I abducted his kid.

133
00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:40,556
I'm not doing that.

134
00:06:40,650 --> 00:06:41,891
Why are you messing up
the mood now, all right?

135
00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:44,728
We wanna go tell the kids my great idea
about the Together Christmas.

136
00:06:44,821 --> 00:06:46,187
Wait, how did it become your idea?

137
00:06:46,323 --> 00:06:48,906
It was your idea,
but I named it Together Christmas.

138
00:06:49,034 --> 00:06:51,196
People of Bikini Bottom...

139
00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:53,243
Hey, guys?

140
00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:56,326
Guys. Listen up, I got a surprise.

141
00:06:56,958 --> 00:06:58,119
Hello?

142
00:07:01,379 --> 00:07:03,712
- Guys. We got a big surprise!
- A surprise?

143
00:07:03,798 --> 00:07:05,289
- Another pony?
- A trampoline?

144
00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:06,419
You leaving?

145
00:07:06,509 --> 00:07:07,499
Not quite, okay?

146
00:07:07,594 --> 00:07:09,051
But, no, we got something better
than that, okay?

147
00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:10,548
So much better.
It's gonna be great.

148
00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:12,387
Guys, this year,
no more back and forth at Christmas.

149
00:07:12,515 --> 00:07:13,926
- We're not doing the back and forth.
- Nope. I just said that.

150
00:07:14,017 --> 00:07:15,383
- No more back and forth at Christmas.
- No back and forth.

151
00:07:15,518 --> 00:07:18,636
This year, we're gonna spend one Christmas
all together, all of us!

152
00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:20,187
- Yay!
- All of us. A Together Christmas!

153
00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:22,105
- A Together Christmas!
- Can you be quiet?

154
00:07:22,192 --> 00:07:23,774
A Together Christmas like a normal family!

155
00:07:23,860 --> 00:07:25,772
- Yay!
- I'll get it.

156
00:07:26,863 --> 00:07:28,229
Hello?

157
00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:29,897
Grandpa Kurt?

158
00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:33,822
Daddy, Grandpa Kurt wants to talk to you.

159
00:07:33,912 --> 00:07:35,528
No, no, no. Dusty, I'll just tell him...

160
00:07:35,622 --> 00:07:37,739
No. It's okay, Sara.

161
00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:39,369
Thank you.

162
00:07:40,377 --> 00:07:41,367
Thanks, buddy.

163
00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:45,921
What, Dad?

164
00:07:47,008 --> 00:07:48,374
Yeah, long time.

165
00:07:48,718 --> 00:07:50,425
No, I'm fine. Tomorrow?

166
00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:51,919
- Tomorrow.
- No.

167
00:07:52,013 --> 00:07:54,380
I could probably pick you up,
I guess, but...

168
00:07:54,891 --> 00:07:57,133
- Guess what? My folks are coming tomorrow.
- I don't care.

169
00:07:57,227 --> 00:07:59,435
- We can go together.
- You shut up.

170
00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:03,018
Dad, do you want to just text... Hello?

171
00:08:08,571 --> 00:08:10,028
Dusty, listen to me,

172
00:08:10,115 --> 00:08:12,903
I think you're approaching this
with way too much negative energy.

173
00:08:12,993 --> 00:08:16,031
Brad, you don't know what you're
talking about, so shut your fat hole!

174
00:08:16,121 --> 00:08:17,578
Dusty.

175
00:08:18,039 --> 00:08:20,031
I'm sorry, Braddie. I'm sorry.

176
00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:21,707
You see what he does to me?

177
00:08:21,793 --> 00:08:23,910
I mean, he's not even here yet,
and he's already ruining Christmas.

178
00:08:24,087 --> 00:08:26,295
- Okay, okay, relax. Relax.
- I can't!

179
00:08:26,589 --> 00:08:29,582
Look, your father hasn't met
the new evolved Dusty.

180
00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:32,672
You're a progressive,
sensitive, child-first parent.

181
00:08:32,804 --> 00:08:35,171
That's exactly the stuff he's gonna
make fun of us for. You'll see.

182
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:37,761
He's gonna scoff at everything we do.
He's a scoffer, Brad.

183
00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:40,767
- Pepe, you have a grown son, right?
- Sí.

184
00:08:40,895 --> 00:08:43,558
Why don't you tell Dusty here
how much your son means to you

185
00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:45,435
in this season of good cheer?

186
00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:49,902
My son is an abysmal disappointment
whose birth I regret more each day.

187
00:08:50,155 --> 00:08:51,566
- You see?
- He didn't say nice things

188
00:08:51,656 --> 00:08:52,817
like you think he did, Brad.

189
00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:54,193
Dusty, you're being silly.

190
00:08:54,284 --> 00:08:55,991
I mean, who wouldn't be
impressed with you?

191
00:08:56,244 --> 00:08:57,951
Come on.

192
00:08:58,121 --> 00:08:59,111
Dear God!

193
00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:06,453
He looks as if he's been chiseled
from Gibraltar itself.

194
00:09:11,468 --> 00:09:14,131
This is gonna come off weird,
Dusty, but he's beautiful.

195
00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:19,385
I want to be his friend so bad.

196
00:09:27,942 --> 00:09:29,649
- Dusty.
- Hey, Pop.

197
00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:31,985
- How was your flight?
- Not bad.

198
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,363
Took 20 minutes to get to the gate though.

199
00:09:34,491 --> 00:09:36,403
What's with that bottleneck
you got out there?

200
00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:40,411
I'm sorry our local airport tarmac's
not up to your standards, huh?

201
00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:43,740
I'm sorry. I didn't realize
you designed this airport,

202
00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:45,290
or I'd have been
more sensitive.

203
00:09:45,376 --> 00:09:47,459
I guess I'll move to a new town
with a better airport

204
00:09:47,545 --> 00:09:50,663
that way you won't be inconvenienced
when you show up every five years or so.

205
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,706
Same old Mr. Touchy. I love it.

206
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:53,916
Here you go, Pancho.

207
00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:56,002
Why don't you bring the car around,
we'll meet you at the curb.

208
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,177
Right away, sir.

209
00:09:57,263 --> 00:10:00,131
I mean, no, I'm sorry, I'm not the driver.

210
00:10:00,433 --> 00:10:01,549
No, I'm Brad.

211
00:10:01,684 --> 00:10:02,720
The stepdad.

212
00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:04,764
- This is Sara's husband.
- Why is he with you?

213
00:10:06,147 --> 00:10:07,137
Dad!

214
00:10:10,902 --> 00:10:13,610
That sweater. He wears a red sweater,
so I can see him in a crowd.

215
00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:18,114
Dad!

216
00:10:18,201 --> 00:10:19,863
That's him, that's Dad.

217
00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:27,579
Dad. Dad.

218
00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:39,761
- I made a sign.
- There's my big man.

219
00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:45,767
And this guy's raising your kids
half the time?

220
00:10:45,895 --> 00:10:48,182
He hasn't seen his dad
in a really long time.

221
00:10:48,273 --> 00:10:50,936
It's only been since Thanksgiving,
but it feels like forever.

222
00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:52,774
It does!

223
00:10:53,903 --> 00:10:56,236
Four weeks? It's been a few years for us.

224
00:10:56,364 --> 00:10:58,947
What should we do?
You want me to take my pants off?

225
00:10:59,075 --> 00:11:00,191
Hey, where's Mom?

226
00:11:00,285 --> 00:11:01,867
You didn't get her text?

227
00:11:01,953 --> 00:11:04,536
Uncle Arny came down with
a bad case of the shingles.

228
00:11:04,914 --> 00:11:07,076
- No.
- So Mom's staying back

229
00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,453
- to take care of him.
- Okay.

230
00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:10,292
But, hey, you still got me.

231
00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:12,540
I sure do. I sure do!

232
00:11:15,216 --> 00:11:16,548
We're gonna have the best time.

233
00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:18,796
Dusty!

234
00:11:18,928 --> 00:11:21,136
- Hey, Don.
- Hey, Muscles, come here.

235
00:11:21,222 --> 00:11:23,760
I've got a cold.
Stay away. Don, Don!

236
00:11:24,851 --> 00:11:26,092
Say, Dusty,

237
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:28,849
Brad told me about this
Together Christmas we're doing.

238
00:11:29,147 --> 00:11:32,936
You two are such wonderful,
progressive co-dads.

239
00:11:33,151 --> 00:11:34,141
Co-dads?

240
00:11:34,319 --> 00:11:36,982
I'm so sorry. Mr. Mayron,
this is my father, Don Whitaker.

241
00:11:37,113 --> 00:11:39,526
The pleasure is all mine, Captain!

242
00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:43,322
You piloted
the Space Shuttle Atlantis in 1992

243
00:11:43,494 --> 00:11:46,453
and commanded the Endeavour
on three missions in 1994!

244
00:11:46,581 --> 00:11:48,163
All right, come on, we're out this way.

245
00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:50,158
Thanks, Dusty.

246
00:11:50,251 --> 00:11:53,710
Say, Kurt, did you meet
any interesting folks on your flight?

247
00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:55,579
I met a Scotch and a pillow.

248
00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:58,878
You know, actually,
I always pick the flights

249
00:11:58,968 --> 00:12:01,051
that have the most connections so that

250
00:12:01,262 --> 00:12:04,721
I get to chat with as many
new people as possible.

251
00:12:05,391 --> 00:12:07,223
- So you're a lunatic. Good to know.
- That's me!

252
00:12:17,695 --> 00:12:20,608
Looks like one of your neighbors
is getting an oversized parcel.

253
00:12:21,282 --> 00:12:22,614
Hello!

254
00:12:23,076 --> 00:12:25,363
Don Whitaker,
United States Postal Service!

255
00:12:25,453 --> 00:12:28,617
Retired, but never too old
to lend a hand to a fellow carrier.

256
00:12:29,499 --> 00:12:32,333
Brad, I gotta tell you,
this baby sure gives you a smooth ride.

257
00:12:32,627 --> 00:12:33,617
Thank you, Kurt.

258
00:12:33,711 --> 00:12:35,873
Yeah, it is surprisingly responsive.

259
00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:37,041
Brad, he's not...

260
00:12:37,173 --> 00:12:38,789
So do they take your balls
right there at the dealership,

261
00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:40,215
or do you send them in
with the registration?

262
00:12:40,343 --> 00:12:41,379
How does it work exactly?

263
00:12:41,469 --> 00:12:43,882
No, no, they didn't take my balls.
Just $2,000 down.

264
00:12:44,055 --> 00:12:45,387
This your place, Dusty?

265
00:12:45,556 --> 00:12:47,843
- I pictured it nicer.
- Yeah, Dusty's house is nicer.

266
00:12:48,059 --> 00:12:49,049
This is my house.

267
00:12:49,185 --> 00:12:51,268
Just thought you'd like to
step in and see the kids.

268
00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:53,804
Only if it's okay. Look, we don't want to
infringe on your days.

269
00:12:54,023 --> 00:12:55,889
Of course, don't be silly. Come on, guys.

270
00:12:56,192 --> 00:12:59,026
You got to ask another man's permission
to see your own kids?

271
00:12:59,654 --> 00:13:01,236
Unbelievable.

272
00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:05,199
We're back! With more daddies!

273
00:13:05,368 --> 00:13:08,281
Hey! Look how big you two got!

274
00:13:08,538 --> 00:13:10,621
Come on. Don't I get a hug? Come on!

275
00:13:12,125 --> 00:13:13,582
And who's this barroom brawler?

276
00:13:13,710 --> 00:13:15,076
He's our brother, Griffy, silly.

277
00:13:15,211 --> 00:13:18,045
Hey, come here, pardner.
Dusty, you never told me.

278
00:13:18,214 --> 00:13:20,547
- Why, he looks just like you.
- Yeah, not my kid.

279
00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:22,549
No, no, no. I fathered that one.

280
00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:24,585
Then how does he relate to me then?

281
00:13:24,679 --> 00:13:27,217
Well, he is the brother of
your grandkids, Kurt.

282
00:13:27,890 --> 00:13:29,381
- Here, here.
- Okay.

283
00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:31,216
Hey, looking good, Buttercup.

284
00:13:31,394 --> 00:13:32,726
Good to see you.

285
00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:36,055
- Look who's here!
- Pop-Pop!

286
00:13:37,275 --> 00:13:38,857
Tell us a Pop-Pop joke!

287
00:13:38,943 --> 00:13:40,980
What's a good one?
Why does a duck have feathers?

288
00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:42,106
Why?

289
00:13:42,238 --> 00:13:43,774
To cover up his butt quack.

290
00:13:46,534 --> 00:13:48,241
Hey, kids, I got a good one for you.

291
00:13:48,411 --> 00:13:50,323
- Two dead hookers wash up on the shore...
- Hey, hey!

292
00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:52,412
- Shut up.
- No way. No way.

293
00:13:52,623 --> 00:13:55,536
- Sara. How's my girl?
- Hi!

294
00:13:56,669 --> 00:13:58,080
What, Ginny couldn't make it?

295
00:13:58,171 --> 00:13:59,378
She feels terrible.

296
00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:01,797
But she sent a batch of
her special cookies!

297
00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:04,295
- Is there milk in that kitchen?
- Yay!

298
00:14:04,427 --> 00:14:06,214
I want the first one.

299
00:14:06,304 --> 00:14:07,840
I get the first one!

300
00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:11,890
So he gets to be Pop-Pop
and I'm just Grandpa Kurt?

301
00:14:12,101 --> 00:14:14,184
What? I'm in charge of the cutesy
grandpa names now?

302
00:14:14,270 --> 00:14:16,478
Look, if you want a better name,
maybe try showing up a little more often.

303
00:14:16,731 --> 00:14:19,644
Tell the kids, from now on, it's El Padre.

304
00:14:21,778 --> 00:14:23,019
No more hooker jokes.

305
00:14:25,448 --> 00:14:28,316
These don't taste like La-La's cookies.
They taste like Chips Ahoys.

306
00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:30,867
No, no. I sat right there in the kitchen

307
00:14:30,953 --> 00:14:33,036
and watched Grandma
bake them just yesterday.

308
00:14:33,206 --> 00:14:34,196
I like them.

309
00:14:34,290 --> 00:14:37,203
So, this co-dads thing,
is that what you call it?

310
00:14:37,794 --> 00:14:39,535
Yeah, that's what we call it.

311
00:14:39,754 --> 00:14:41,837
So, on his watch,
he disciplines your kids,

312
00:14:41,923 --> 00:14:43,664
gives them advice, tucks them in, so forth

313
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:45,132
and that bothers you not a bit?

314
00:14:45,343 --> 00:14:46,379
Doesn't bother me at all.

315
00:14:46,469 --> 00:14:48,301
And his total lack of masculinity...

316
00:14:48,388 --> 00:14:51,881
I mean, his weak chin and soft underbelly
influencing your son,

317
00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:53,549
you're good there, too? Yeah?

318
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:56,514
You know what? I'm just feeling like
maybe you guys want a little privacy.

319
00:14:56,646 --> 00:14:58,308
Stay right there, Brad, all right?

320
00:14:58,398 --> 00:14:59,809
He's just trying to stir the turd.

321
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,686
You can scoff all you want.

322
00:15:01,776 --> 00:15:03,483
Everything is rock solid
between me and Brad here.

323
00:15:03,569 --> 00:15:05,936
- In fact, best friends.
- Really?

324
00:15:07,615 --> 00:15:09,902
- Thank you.
- Brad. Stop it. Now.

325
00:15:10,201 --> 00:15:11,737
- I'm good.
- He gets really emotional.

326
00:15:12,203 --> 00:15:14,946
- Brad. Hey. Brother.
- Did you call me "brother"?

327
00:15:15,248 --> 00:15:16,705
B-Dawg. Chill out, man. Relax.

328
00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:18,331
All right? Cut it out.

329
00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:20,496
- Brad, don't.
- I know.

330
00:15:20,670 --> 00:15:22,957
Stop. All right, look. Hey. Brad, stop!

331
00:15:23,172 --> 00:15:26,131
Looks like you two guys
have a real solid arrangement.

332
00:15:26,342 --> 00:15:28,425
You're spending Christmas together
and everything.

333
00:15:28,511 --> 00:15:30,719
Speaking of which,
whose place are we doing that at?

334
00:15:30,888 --> 00:15:32,845
We're totally happy to host
if it makes it easier.

335
00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,594
Yeah, we could do it at my place.
I got more room.

336
00:15:34,684 --> 00:15:36,676
We can do presents at our place,
dinner at yours.

337
00:15:36,811 --> 00:15:38,643
Nah, all that back and forth,
who needs that?

338
00:15:38,729 --> 00:15:39,890
This place, that place.

339
00:15:40,148 --> 00:15:43,232
Why don't I book us
a great vacation spot

340
00:15:43,526 --> 00:15:45,142
for all of us,
and we can all spend

341
00:15:45,236 --> 00:15:46,522
the holiday week together?

342
00:15:46,696 --> 00:15:47,903
- Yay! Cool!
- Thanks, El Padre.

343
00:15:48,698 --> 00:15:50,314
I love this idea!

344
00:15:50,408 --> 00:15:52,240
It's something extra Christmasy,

345
00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:55,452
with lots of snow and family activities
for all of us.

346
00:15:55,538 --> 00:15:57,120
Dad, I'm just worried about
finding a place,

347
00:15:57,206 --> 00:15:58,447
you know, this close to the holiday.

348
00:15:58,624 --> 00:16:00,832
Booked it! Airbnb. All done.

349
00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:03,122
Yay, El Padre!

350
00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:07,628
It's gonna be so fun,
since we're all such great friends, huh?

351
00:16:10,136 --> 00:16:12,344
Off to the mountains.
Here we go, Griffy.

352
00:16:12,430 --> 00:16:14,638
- Here we go.
- Big fun trip!

353
00:16:14,932 --> 00:16:16,389
Let me get that for you, Sara.

354
00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:17,887
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

355
00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:19,639
You know, Dusty, I think you and Kurt

356
00:16:19,729 --> 00:16:21,641
spending some time around me and my dad

357
00:16:22,064 --> 00:16:23,305
might do you both some good.

358
00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:24,769
Hey, don't you see what he's up to here?

359
00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:27,351
He thinks you and me are harboring
bad feelings for one another

360
00:16:27,445 --> 00:16:29,983
and sticking us together in some cabin is
gonna bring out whatever we're harboring.

361
00:16:30,198 --> 00:16:31,655
But you're not, are you, Brad?

362
00:16:31,741 --> 00:16:32,948
- I'm not what?
- Harboring!

363
00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:34,065
No, I'm not harboring anything.

364
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:35,196
Good, 'cause I'm not
harboring anything either.

365
00:16:35,286 --> 00:16:36,572
Okay, well, let's use this
as an opportunity

366
00:16:36,662 --> 00:16:37,823
to show him that we're not harboring.

367
00:16:37,914 --> 00:16:38,995
'Cause we're not harboring.

368
00:16:39,123 --> 00:16:40,239
You're looking at
one safe harbor right here.

369
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:41,369
All right, good.

370
00:16:41,459 --> 00:16:43,621
You sure you want to pack it like that?
Is that how you're gonna do it?

371
00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:45,836
Look, me and Brad got
everything under control as a team, okay?

372
00:16:46,130 --> 00:16:47,496
- Right, Brad?
- That's right.

373
00:16:47,757 --> 00:16:48,998
Yeah, what would I know about travel?

374
00:16:49,091 --> 00:16:50,423
I've only been to frickin' space.

375
00:16:50,593 --> 00:16:51,709
What, did you pack
the space shuttle yourself?

376
00:16:51,802 --> 00:16:54,294
You pop the trunk, arrange all the bags
for you and your little space friends?

377
00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:56,467
I did, as a matter of fact.
Yes, I packed the shuttle.

378
00:16:58,434 --> 00:16:59,675
That's so cool!

379
00:17:00,061 --> 00:17:01,973
I love how you're always
jotting down ideas

380
00:17:02,063 --> 00:17:03,804
for your book in your little notepad.

381
00:17:04,190 --> 00:17:05,431
People ever get crazy and think

382
00:17:05,525 --> 00:17:07,107
you might be writing
something bad about them?

383
00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:14,615
Say, Brad, would you mind doing some
"Yes, And" drills with me on the way?

384
00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:17,283
"Yes, And" thank you for asking me.

385
00:17:17,453 --> 00:17:20,287
I recently joined
an improv comedy workshop.

386
00:17:20,373 --> 00:17:22,205
Brad's been pushing me to do it for years.

387
00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:23,498
Because you're so funny.

388
00:17:23,626 --> 00:17:25,117
Yeah, I really enjoy it.

389
00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:26,452
You should look into it, too, Kurt.

390
00:17:26,629 --> 00:17:28,086
I'd rather look into a loaded gun.

391
00:17:28,631 --> 00:17:30,122
- Did you hear that?
- Did you just make that up?

392
00:17:30,299 --> 00:17:32,040
- Zinger!
- That's provocative, too.

393
00:17:32,301 --> 00:17:33,837
You ready to let me do that, Mr. Stubborn?

394
00:17:33,970 --> 00:17:35,632
- I got it.
- It's never gonna fit.

395
00:17:35,930 --> 00:17:37,341
Hey, kids, no, no, no, no,

396
00:17:37,473 --> 00:17:40,216
why don't you jump into my car
with Adrianna, all right?

397
00:17:40,309 --> 00:17:43,973
So Grandpa Kurt here can enjoy
Pop-Pop's company on the way up.

398
00:17:44,647 --> 00:17:47,230
Already warmed up a spot
in the capsule for you, Captain!

399
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:49,266
Still never gonna fit. Ever.

400
00:17:52,822 --> 00:17:54,529
No, I got it. It's fitting fine.

401
00:17:54,824 --> 00:17:56,656
I just had to put it wheels-in.

402
00:18:01,247 --> 00:18:03,489
Perfect fit! All right, let's go.

403
00:18:03,666 --> 00:18:05,498
Hey, Adrianna, you know,
when we're up there,

404
00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:06,951
I can teach you how to snowboard.

405
00:18:07,044 --> 00:18:08,160
You're not my dad.

406
00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:10,462
All right. It's gonna be a fun trip.

407
00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:17,670
It's time for One-Word Story.

408
00:18:17,847 --> 00:18:20,055
Anyone can join in,
doesn't have to be just Dad and I.

409
00:18:20,141 --> 00:18:22,133
You always give us the best start.

410
00:18:22,685 --> 00:18:24,677
- Uncle...
- ...Thomas...

411
00:18:24,854 --> 00:18:26,265
- ...went...
- ...tiptoeing...

412
00:18:26,355 --> 00:18:27,471
...into the...

413
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:29,098
...Empire State Building.

414
00:18:30,359 --> 00:18:32,021
Where were you going with that one?

415
00:18:32,153 --> 00:18:35,487
This all took place
at the pancake breakfast!

416
00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:41,030
"G." Georgia, Georgia license plate!

417
00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:42,949
Ready, and... Quiet Game.

418
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:47,449
- I'm terrible at this game!
- I can't do it!

419
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,038
- I just can't do it.
- I hate the Quiet Game!

420
00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:09,638
We always liked the Shimpahs.

421
00:19:09,899 --> 00:19:14,189
The movers thought the Shimpahs' house was
our house and almost moved us in there!

422
00:19:14,278 --> 00:19:16,895
The wrong family!
We would've been living with the Shimpahs!

423
00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:18,605
Which I wouldn't have minded,

424
00:19:18,741 --> 00:19:21,449
'cause I had a huge crush
on Vicky Shimpah.

425
00:19:22,662 --> 00:19:24,028
Dad, thank you.

426
00:19:24,121 --> 00:19:26,078
You make a five-hour trip go by like that!

427
00:19:26,248 --> 00:19:28,035
I just wanted everybody
to have a good time.

428
00:19:28,125 --> 00:19:29,661
Nothing like a nice,
relaxing road trip, huh, Dad?

429
00:19:29,835 --> 00:19:31,042
It was nothing.

430
00:19:31,128 --> 00:19:33,336
I've been in a confined space
with a chimp.

431
00:19:51,941 --> 00:19:54,354
Dylan's got a girlfriend!

432
00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:55,559
No, I don't! Be quiet!

433
00:19:55,653 --> 00:19:56,734
Yeah, you love her.

434
00:19:56,821 --> 00:19:58,938
You want to buy her flowers
and kiss her on the lips.

435
00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:00,481
Stop it! It's not funny!

436
00:20:00,658 --> 00:20:03,571
Megan! What did I say about
teasing your brother about girls?

437
00:20:03,786 --> 00:20:04,822
She's still doing it.

438
00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:06,820
And she drilled him in the head
with a snowball too.

439
00:20:06,956 --> 00:20:08,663
Well, I'm not her mother.

440
00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:11,332
Now, go take your brother inside, please.
Go on, sweetie.

441
00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:12,575
Come on, Griffy.

442
00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:15,287
So Dylan's started noticing the girls?

443
00:20:15,464 --> 00:20:17,376
You know, I think it's gonna
be time to give him the talk.

444
00:20:18,676 --> 00:20:21,419
The talk? You mean the talk
about the nitty-gritty?

445
00:20:21,512 --> 00:20:23,253
- The "nitty-gritty"?
- I'm on it, Sar-Bear.

446
00:20:23,347 --> 00:20:24,804
I've been looking forward to this
for a long time.

447
00:20:25,015 --> 00:20:26,347
I got a whole speech prepared, all right?

448
00:20:26,434 --> 00:20:27,800
It's all heartwarming stuff.

449
00:20:27,977 --> 00:20:30,139
I'm sure you and Brad will do
a bang-up job with that.

450
00:20:31,355 --> 00:20:33,221
Unless this isn't a co-dadding moment?

451
00:20:33,607 --> 00:20:34,973
- No.
- No.

452
00:20:35,067 --> 00:20:37,730
- I mean, no, of course it is.
- It is.

453
00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:39,144
- Yeah, it is. It's gonna be.
- Okay, yeah.

454
00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:40,820
Yeah, we're gonna talk to him together.

455
00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:43,398
Dusty! I read about some
gender-neutral flashcards.

456
00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:45,241
Flashcards.

457
00:20:45,327 --> 00:20:47,489
He's got flashcards
to teach your son how to score.

458
00:20:47,663 --> 00:20:48,870
No, of course not.

459
00:20:48,998 --> 00:20:51,490
They cover human reproduction,
puberty, and hygiene.

460
00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:53,659
Okay, great.
You tee it up with the flashcards,

461
00:20:54,170 --> 00:20:55,786
and I'll knock it home
with the heartwarming speech.

462
00:20:56,005 --> 00:20:57,792
- All right? We got this.
- You're all set.

463
00:20:57,923 --> 00:21:02,418
I'll never forget when Brad first started
asking questions about girls.

464
00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:04,882
I took him out for "the talk."

465
00:21:05,556 --> 00:21:08,094
He was so inquisitive and attentive.

466
00:21:08,809 --> 00:21:11,347
Then I dropped him back off at his dorm.

467
00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:12,510
Yeah...

468
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:14,479
Well, come on in.

469
00:21:19,361 --> 00:21:20,397
Hey, look, there's a game room!

470
00:21:21,030 --> 00:21:22,771
- And a pool table!
- Adrianna, look.

471
00:21:22,948 --> 00:21:24,189
This is what I'm talking about.

472
00:21:24,366 --> 00:21:25,402
Look at that view!

473
00:21:26,368 --> 00:21:28,280
Look at all the mortise and tenon joinery!

474
00:21:28,579 --> 00:21:29,660
Sittin' fat.

475
00:21:29,830 --> 00:21:32,664
Your old man sure pulled the right rein
getting this place.

476
00:21:33,375 --> 00:21:34,866
I know. Better throw you a parade, huh?

477
00:21:35,753 --> 00:21:37,460
I am really looking forward to that.

478
00:21:37,546 --> 00:21:39,287
Well, you want the thank yous
printed on the bass drums

479
00:21:39,381 --> 00:21:40,542
or the sousaphone covers?

480
00:21:40,633 --> 00:21:42,795
Hey, did anyone bring my bag in?

481
00:21:46,055 --> 00:21:48,217
My supervisor Clyde Unix...

482
00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:51,220
He took over after
Kirby Keller retired in '86.

483
00:21:51,393 --> 00:21:54,056
Horse farm,
upper peninsula of Michigan.

484
00:21:54,230 --> 00:21:56,313
Gorgeous country,
if you ever get the chance.

485
00:22:01,987 --> 00:22:03,319
Nice shower.

486
00:22:05,157 --> 00:22:06,398
That's weird.

487
00:22:07,451 --> 00:22:08,908
No controls.

488
00:22:10,079 --> 00:22:12,162
Hey, honey,
how do you turn the shower on?

489
00:22:12,248 --> 00:22:13,830
Shower on.

490
00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:15,748
Off! Shower off!

491
00:22:15,835 --> 00:22:17,326
Shower off.

492
00:22:17,711 --> 00:22:19,452
Gosh!

493
00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:22,831
Voice-activated water. Cool.

494
00:22:22,967 --> 00:22:24,083
Water cool.

495
00:22:24,844 --> 00:22:27,177
- Off! Shower off!
- Shower off.

496
00:22:27,429 --> 00:22:29,091
- Water... Cool...
- Water. Shower cool.

497
00:22:29,265 --> 00:22:30,927
- Cool the water.
- Water cool.

498
00:22:31,725 --> 00:22:33,887
Water off! Turn off!

499
00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:36,268
Off.

500
00:22:36,689 --> 00:22:37,770
Oh, my God.

501
00:22:39,316 --> 00:22:40,352
Oh, my God!

502
00:22:40,442 --> 00:22:42,684
You scored on yourself.
Friendly fire.

503
00:22:42,778 --> 00:22:44,189
Eight ball, corner pocket.

504
00:22:44,446 --> 00:22:45,778
- No slashing.
- Yeah.

505
00:22:45,906 --> 00:22:47,693
- Good job, babe.
- Thank you, babe.

506
00:22:49,451 --> 00:22:50,942
Come on, Sara!

507
00:22:51,287 --> 00:22:52,778
No, that is holding.

508
00:22:56,625 --> 00:22:58,287
It's too loud, Dylan! Turn it down!

509
00:22:58,377 --> 00:22:59,413
I don't know how!

510
00:22:59,503 --> 00:23:01,165
Hey, hey, hey, turn that down!

511
00:23:01,463 --> 00:23:03,045
Griffy's asleep.

512
00:23:06,719 --> 00:23:08,301
Why are you dressed like a woman, Brad?

513
00:23:08,387 --> 00:23:09,377
I can't find my stuff.

514
00:23:09,471 --> 00:23:11,258
Are you sure you got my bag
to fit in the car?

515
00:23:11,348 --> 00:23:12,714
Yeah, of course. It fit perfect.

516
00:23:12,808 --> 00:23:14,891
Look, can we skip this one?
I can't stand this song.

517
00:23:15,019 --> 00:23:17,932
- Skip it. Skip it, guys.
- No, no, no! No, Sara.

518
00:23:18,314 --> 00:23:19,600
This is a great song.

519
00:23:20,149 --> 00:23:22,186
This is my real dad's
favorite Christmas song.

520
00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:24,066
Yeah, well, I'm glad it makes him happy.

521
00:23:24,570 --> 00:23:26,027
You think I don't want to like this song?

522
00:23:26,155 --> 00:23:28,272
Of course I want to,
it's a super uplifting song.

523
00:23:28,365 --> 00:23:30,072
- Yeah.
- But he ruined it for me.

524
00:23:30,618 --> 00:23:31,779
What are you talking about?

525
00:23:31,994 --> 00:23:34,486
All right, so I'm 12 years old,
and I join the Glee Club.

526
00:23:34,705 --> 00:23:35,695
Glee Club.

527
00:23:35,956 --> 00:23:38,414
All my buddies in the neighborhood,
they gave me crap over it,

528
00:23:38,500 --> 00:23:39,832
but I don't care,
because for the holiday pageant

529
00:23:39,919 --> 00:23:41,330
we're doing
Do They Know It's Christmas?,

530
00:23:41,503 --> 00:23:43,870
and I was determined
to land that Bono part.

531
00:23:56,727 --> 00:23:59,561
So my buddy Derrick Lindmeyer
is laying into the Sting part,

532
00:24:00,439 --> 00:24:02,271
when out in the audience, what do I see?

533
00:24:02,775 --> 00:24:05,188
My dad giving
Scotty Kimball's mom a foot rub,

534
00:24:05,277 --> 00:24:06,518
not even paying attention!

535
00:24:11,241 --> 00:24:14,359
I totally missed the Bono part,
and everybody made fun of me.

536
00:24:24,546 --> 00:24:26,037
I got no recollection of that.

537
00:24:26,173 --> 00:24:27,163
Yeah, well, I do, all right?

538
00:24:27,257 --> 00:24:28,839
And I got a lot of other stories
just like it.

539
00:24:28,926 --> 00:24:30,963
Science Fair, you left with
Brian Higby's mom.

540
00:24:31,428 --> 00:24:33,920
Little League regionals, you left with
Mark Fitzgerald's mom and his aunt!

541
00:24:34,723 --> 00:24:35,930
Yeah, now that I remember.

542
00:24:36,266 --> 00:24:37,598
Yeah, yeah. That went into extra innings.

543
00:24:37,726 --> 00:24:38,842
Know what I mean, kid?

544
00:24:39,019 --> 00:24:40,260
No.

545
00:24:40,813 --> 00:24:41,894
Nice.

546
00:24:45,985 --> 00:24:48,068
Dusty! Dusty! Come on.

547
00:24:48,237 --> 00:24:50,570
He's gonna ruin Christmas, Brad,
I'm telling you.

548
00:24:50,739 --> 00:24:52,901
Look, I hate to hit you
with the tough love,

549
00:24:53,033 --> 00:24:55,241
but the only person
who can ruin your Christmas

550
00:24:55,911 --> 00:24:58,574
is looking back at you from that mirror.

551
00:25:00,499 --> 00:25:01,990
All I see is you, Brad.

552
00:25:02,251 --> 00:25:04,083
Okay. Well, sorry. Here. Here.

553
00:25:05,337 --> 00:25:06,453
There. There we go.

554
00:25:07,214 --> 00:25:08,455
- Still you, Brad.
- Is it?

555
00:25:08,632 --> 00:25:09,748
Yeah, it's still you.

556
00:25:10,009 --> 00:25:12,797
Okay, well, look, I'm looking at you,
so I meant you.

557
00:25:12,886 --> 00:25:14,468
Well, I'm looking at you, so I see you.

558
00:25:14,596 --> 00:25:15,586
Forget the mirror.

559
00:25:15,681 --> 00:25:17,422
You're the only one
who can ruin your Christmas.

560
00:25:17,516 --> 00:25:18,506
Don't look at the mirror!

561
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:20,011
I'm still looking at you
if I look in the mirror.

562
00:25:20,102 --> 00:25:22,310
Don't worry about the mirror.
That was bad.

563
00:25:22,604 --> 00:25:23,890
- Forget the mirror exists.
- Okay.

564
00:25:24,148 --> 00:25:25,730
Let's just focus on those kids

565
00:25:25,816 --> 00:25:27,773
and giving them
a better childhood than you had.

566
00:25:29,611 --> 00:25:30,818
- You're right.
- Yeah?

567
00:25:30,904 --> 00:25:31,894
It's about them.

568
00:25:32,031 --> 00:25:33,112
It's about giving them a better Christmas.

569
00:25:33,198 --> 00:25:34,234
There you go.

570
00:25:34,324 --> 00:25:36,236
Yeah, and then we jam that
amazing Christmas right in his butthole!

571
00:25:36,368 --> 00:25:38,451
Yes, we do. Wait! No.

572
00:25:38,537 --> 00:25:39,698
Yes!

573
00:25:40,205 --> 00:25:42,197
You know, Dusty,
I'm just gonna take the mirror down.

574
00:25:42,291 --> 00:25:43,782
Then we don't have to worry about it.

575
00:25:46,628 --> 00:25:47,709
Yeah!

576
00:25:47,963 --> 00:25:49,795
- Here we go.
- Here we go.

577
00:25:50,007 --> 00:25:51,794
Hey, where's your glove?

578
00:25:53,469 --> 00:25:55,335
No! Griffy!

579
00:25:56,889 --> 00:25:57,879
Excuse me.

580
00:26:00,476 --> 00:26:01,637
Griffy!

581
00:26:03,103 --> 00:26:04,514
Griffy! Hey!

582
00:26:05,814 --> 00:26:06,804
Griffy!

583
00:26:07,149 --> 00:26:08,731
Griffy!

584
00:26:09,276 --> 00:26:11,017
Watch out, honey!

585
00:26:17,659 --> 00:26:19,195
Is that Brad?

586
00:26:21,914 --> 00:26:23,655
- That's Brad!
- That's Brad.

587
00:26:25,584 --> 00:26:26,745
That boy never...

588
00:26:28,045 --> 00:26:29,252
Hey, come here. Look at this.

589
00:26:36,178 --> 00:26:37,510
Honey.

590
00:26:42,726 --> 00:26:44,012
Dusty, you like that?

591
00:26:47,106 --> 00:26:48,722
Let me capture this for posterity.

592
00:26:53,028 --> 00:26:55,691
The Nativity is a big deal in Terra Haute.

593
00:26:55,864 --> 00:26:58,607
This is the Redeemer,
this is Abundant Life.

594
00:26:58,700 --> 00:26:59,736
Dad.

595
00:27:00,035 --> 00:27:02,493
Let's go, Pop-Pop.

596
00:27:07,376 --> 00:27:09,368
- It's real pretty.
- We'll take the pretty gun.

597
00:27:09,545 --> 00:27:11,707
No. No, no, no, no.

598
00:27:12,131 --> 00:27:15,215
We're not gonna take that today
'cause we are a gun-free family.

599
00:27:15,300 --> 00:27:18,543
Good Lord. What has he turned you into?

600
00:27:28,564 --> 00:27:30,055
All right, throw it down!

601
00:27:30,190 --> 00:27:32,227
All right, here it comes, Braddie!

602
00:27:39,158 --> 00:27:40,148
Brad!

603
00:27:46,331 --> 00:27:47,538
Hey, honey!

604
00:27:47,916 --> 00:27:49,202
Brad! Brad!

605
00:27:49,668 --> 00:27:51,751
You need a hat.
You're gonna freeze, babe.

606
00:27:52,212 --> 00:27:53,293
Thanks, sweetie.

607
00:27:53,463 --> 00:27:54,453
You look cute.

608
00:27:55,090 --> 00:27:57,753
Hey, I want to talk to you.
I'm worried about your dad.

609
00:27:58,552 --> 00:28:01,295
Don't you think he seems
slightly less chatty than normal?

610
00:28:01,471 --> 00:28:02,678
You got to be shitting me.

611
00:28:03,849 --> 00:28:05,841
I mean, he shows up here without your mom?

612
00:28:05,934 --> 00:28:08,221
Don't you think that's weird?
There might be a problem?

613
00:28:08,312 --> 00:28:09,803
With my mom and dad's relationship?

614
00:28:09,938 --> 00:28:10,928
Yeah!

615
00:28:11,023 --> 00:28:13,606
What? They love each other
more than we do!

616
00:28:13,942 --> 00:28:14,932
Yeah.

617
00:28:15,027 --> 00:28:16,359
I brought you your hat!

618
00:28:16,653 --> 00:28:18,519
No, honey, I didn't mean it that way.

619
00:28:18,614 --> 00:28:20,446
It's a huge compliment. Come on.

620
00:28:20,699 --> 00:28:21,689
You got to understand.

621
00:28:21,783 --> 00:28:23,524
Brad! The Christmas lights!

622
00:28:24,536 --> 00:28:26,277
No, no, no, no.

623
00:28:27,122 --> 00:28:28,909
All the light strands are connected.

624
00:28:28,999 --> 00:28:30,285
A terrible idea!

625
00:28:34,296 --> 00:28:35,662
None of these switches work!

626
00:28:37,966 --> 00:28:39,127
Heads up.

627
00:28:40,302 --> 00:28:42,385
Dad! What are these levers for?

628
00:28:43,847 --> 00:28:45,304
- Sara!
- Stand clear!

629
00:28:45,390 --> 00:28:46,471
Brad!

630
00:28:52,189 --> 00:28:53,555
Brad, let it go!

631
00:28:53,732 --> 00:28:55,223
I don't want it to hit your car.

632
00:28:55,359 --> 00:28:56,395
Let it go!

633
00:28:59,279 --> 00:29:00,986
- Tell him to let it go.
- Let it go!

634
00:29:11,333 --> 00:29:12,665
Are you all right?

635
00:29:14,336 --> 00:29:16,874
Look what you did
to the side of my car, man.

636
00:29:21,343 --> 00:29:23,175
Dusty, I'm so sorry.

637
00:29:24,763 --> 00:29:25,753
Honey!

638
00:29:30,644 --> 00:29:32,636
I'm not putting that Santa Claus
back up there.

639
00:29:32,729 --> 00:29:35,062
I don't want to put it back
on the roof, either.

640
00:29:35,816 --> 00:29:37,273
Why didn't he let go?

641
00:29:37,943 --> 00:29:39,479
Because he's an idiot!

642
00:29:52,582 --> 00:29:54,073
Son of a...

643
00:30:01,550 --> 00:30:02,540
Don.

644
00:30:03,385 --> 00:30:04,375
Don.

645
00:30:04,511 --> 00:30:06,218
Don, wake up. Don!

646
00:30:07,306 --> 00:30:09,263
Don, wake up! Don! Don!

647
00:30:11,893 --> 00:30:15,386
Kurt, are you okay?
Did you have a bad dream?

648
00:30:15,897 --> 00:30:16,887
Do you need to talk?

649
00:30:17,107 --> 00:30:19,474
Yeah, I need to be held.
My heart hurts. No!

650
00:30:19,818 --> 00:30:22,060
Did you touch the thermostat?
Did you turn it up?

651
00:30:22,237 --> 00:30:23,728
Well, of course not.

652
00:30:23,822 --> 00:30:25,438
Did somebody fiddle with the thermostat?

653
00:30:25,532 --> 00:30:26,568
Yes! It's 85 degrees.

654
00:30:26,742 --> 00:30:29,075
85! Do you have any idea how much

655
00:30:29,161 --> 00:30:31,244
even a few degrees
can impact the gas bill?

656
00:30:31,413 --> 00:30:33,120
Of course I do! It's unthinkable.

657
00:30:33,248 --> 00:30:35,865
Dad? Kurt?
What's going on in here?

658
00:30:36,251 --> 00:30:37,241
Why is it so hot?

659
00:30:37,377 --> 00:30:38,993
Someone fiddled with the thermostat!

660
00:30:39,171 --> 00:30:41,254
What? Who would do that?

661
00:30:48,764 --> 00:30:50,426
What do you think you're doing?

662
00:30:50,599 --> 00:30:51,840
It's roasting in here!

663
00:30:52,142 --> 00:30:53,974
I like to sleep with my window open.

664
00:30:54,269 --> 00:30:55,259
Hey, kid.

665
00:30:55,562 --> 00:30:58,020
Are you allowed to touch the thermostat
at your mom's house?

666
00:31:03,570 --> 00:31:04,560
What is going on?

667
00:31:05,113 --> 00:31:07,196
Adrianna! She turned up the thermostat!

668
00:31:07,282 --> 00:31:09,274
Said she fiddles with
the thermostat at your place

669
00:31:09,368 --> 00:31:10,825
any time she damn well pleases.

670
00:31:11,119 --> 00:31:13,486
Dusty, is that true?
Tell me that's not true.

671
00:31:15,123 --> 00:31:16,330
Oh, criminy, Dusty!

672
00:31:16,500 --> 00:31:19,334
You might as well give her your wallet
and your 401(k) while you're at it!

673
00:31:19,461 --> 00:31:21,453
Brad, do you let the kids
touch the thermostat at your house?

674
00:31:21,588 --> 00:31:25,047
What? No!
The thermostat is a sacred covenant.

675
00:31:25,217 --> 00:31:27,584
I can't believe
we're even talking about this!

676
00:31:27,677 --> 00:31:28,838
This is madness!

677
00:31:29,304 --> 00:31:31,091
Oh, God, even Brad's got
his house in order.

678
00:31:31,181 --> 00:31:32,513
Hey, you got no right to talk, all right?

679
00:31:32,599 --> 00:31:34,056
It wasn't hard to keep me away
from the thermostat

680
00:31:34,142 --> 00:31:35,474
once you shipped me off
to military school.

681
00:31:35,644 --> 00:31:36,634
Kurt, you didn't.

682
00:31:36,728 --> 00:31:37,809
He was out of control. He was a bedwetter.

683
00:31:38,021 --> 00:31:39,728
I was a bedwetter.
Were you a bedwetter?

684
00:31:39,815 --> 00:31:41,147
I was four years old!

685
00:31:41,233 --> 00:31:42,849
Okay, everyone take it easy.

686
00:31:43,318 --> 00:31:46,152
It's not Dusty's fault
that he lets Adrianna walk all over him.

687
00:31:46,488 --> 00:31:47,899
She does not walk all over me!

688
00:31:47,989 --> 00:31:49,946
I can see how being a stepdad,

689
00:31:50,033 --> 00:31:53,697
you might not feel empowered to discipline
someone else's child.

690
00:31:54,371 --> 00:31:55,987
Hey, quit your scoffing, all right?

691
00:31:56,164 --> 00:31:57,245
And you two quit helping me.

692
00:31:57,332 --> 00:32:01,326
Look, Karen and Roger spoil her to no end.

693
00:32:01,586 --> 00:32:03,498
It's crazy!

694
00:32:03,672 --> 00:32:05,379
And there's nothing you can do. I get it!

695
00:32:05,507 --> 00:32:07,715
You're the stepdad.
You're screwed.

696
00:32:07,926 --> 00:32:09,667
That kid's never gonna respect you

697
00:32:09,761 --> 00:32:11,172
unless you bring the hammer down.

698
00:32:21,064 --> 00:32:22,396
What the hell was that, Brad?

699
00:32:23,024 --> 00:32:24,811
I know.
He's old school.

700
00:32:24,901 --> 00:32:26,858
I think you handled this
really well, Brad.

701
00:32:26,945 --> 00:32:28,732
I'm so proud of the way
you express yourself.

702
00:32:29,698 --> 00:32:30,734
Come here.

703
00:32:31,616 --> 00:32:33,152
Again? Really?

704
00:32:34,953 --> 00:32:36,194
Good night, Dusty!

705
00:32:36,455 --> 00:32:38,412
- Good night, Dad.
- Good night, Brad.

706
00:32:58,101 --> 00:32:59,717
- Jump! Jump!
- Come on, Griff.

707
00:33:00,270 --> 00:33:01,727
Jumpy, jumpy, jumpy!

708
00:33:02,397 --> 00:33:03,387
Casey's here!

709
00:33:04,024 --> 00:33:05,014
Hey, guys.

710
00:33:05,609 --> 00:33:06,725
Hey.

711
00:33:06,860 --> 00:33:08,601
Hey, Dylan, look. Casey's here.

712
00:33:08,737 --> 00:33:09,818
You want to come French her?

713
00:33:10,113 --> 00:33:12,821
Yeah, you want to go do French
on your girlfriend, Dylan?

714
00:33:12,949 --> 00:33:14,986
Megan! Leave him alone.

715
00:33:15,327 --> 00:33:17,410
And where did you learn "do French"?

716
00:33:17,579 --> 00:33:18,569
I'll go talk to him.

717
00:33:21,791 --> 00:33:24,204
Dylan? You okay, buddy?

718
00:33:27,422 --> 00:33:29,880
I just... I don't get
the whole girls thing.

719
00:33:31,510 --> 00:33:33,752
Girls, yeah.
Yeah, that can be tricky.

720
00:33:34,304 --> 00:33:36,887
But you know who'd be really good
in explaining that department?

721
00:33:37,224 --> 00:33:38,510
Your dad. Let me go grab him.

722
00:33:38,642 --> 00:33:40,804
No, Brad!
I just want to talk to you about this.

723
00:33:40,936 --> 00:33:41,926
Just you, Brad, please?

724
00:33:42,062 --> 00:33:44,019
Me? You sure you don't want to
talk to your dad?

725
00:33:45,273 --> 00:33:47,481
Well, girls. Okay.

726
00:33:49,903 --> 00:33:50,893
All right, the girl talk.

727
00:33:52,447 --> 00:33:54,609
You know, boys have a...

728
00:33:55,075 --> 00:33:57,863
A dingle, right?
And girls have a hoo-hoo or a whim-wham.

729
00:33:57,953 --> 00:34:00,161
- Brad, I already know about that stuff.
- You do?

730
00:34:00,372 --> 00:34:02,409
- Yes. From school, and it's gross.
- Perfect!

731
00:34:02,499 --> 00:34:04,786
I just want to know what to do
if I, you know,

732
00:34:05,168 --> 00:34:06,284
I like somebody.

733
00:34:06,461 --> 00:34:07,451
Right, well...

734
00:34:08,672 --> 00:34:10,208
You want to become her friend first.

735
00:34:10,382 --> 00:34:12,590
You want to be that one
that she confides in,

736
00:34:12,676 --> 00:34:14,417
that she tells you
about all of her problems

737
00:34:14,511 --> 00:34:15,797
with the guys she's actually dating.

738
00:34:16,096 --> 00:34:17,086
Got it.

739
00:34:17,180 --> 00:34:18,512
It's called the Friend Zone.

740
00:34:18,598 --> 00:34:21,341
And it's where we Whitaker men thrive.

741
00:34:22,310 --> 00:34:25,053
We're the best in the biz. Yeah.

742
00:34:25,355 --> 00:34:29,144
Here we are in a wild frontier,
full of majestic pines,

743
00:34:29,359 --> 00:34:31,066
and you two numb nuts are sorting through

744
00:34:31,152 --> 00:34:33,690
a bunch of dried twigs
on a Rite Aid parking lot.

745
00:34:33,822 --> 00:34:35,859
You just can't go out on public land
and cut down a tree, Dad.

746
00:34:35,949 --> 00:34:38,657
Dusty, we are the public.
We own those trees.

747
00:34:40,996 --> 00:34:43,534
I get it. You need to
ask co-dad for permission.

748
00:34:43,832 --> 00:34:45,573
Shut up. I know what you're trying to do.

749
00:34:45,709 --> 00:34:46,699
What am I doing?

750
00:34:46,835 --> 00:34:49,327
Make it look like I can't make a move
without checking in with Brad first.

751
00:34:49,421 --> 00:34:51,834
Yeah, that's what I'm doing.
Am I right about that?

752
00:34:53,383 --> 00:34:54,373
God.

753
00:34:57,721 --> 00:35:00,384
And we own the paint in the Friend Zone.

754
00:35:00,724 --> 00:35:02,886
And sure we're gonna lose some.
Doesn't matter.

755
00:35:03,059 --> 00:35:04,721
We're gonna lose a lot,
I'll be frank with you.

756
00:35:04,894 --> 00:35:06,260
Well, what do you know?

757
00:35:06,354 --> 00:35:08,562
Brad's having that
nitty-gritty talk for you.

758
00:35:09,566 --> 00:35:11,933
Must be nice to have someone
to handle the tough stuff, huh?

759
00:35:12,736 --> 00:35:14,523
And eventually you'll keep in touch.

760
00:35:14,738 --> 00:35:16,775
You might even be invited to
their wedding!

761
00:35:17,324 --> 00:35:19,441
And their dad's like,
"Brad, what are you doing here?

762
00:35:19,534 --> 00:35:21,696
"Teresa never talks about you!"

763
00:35:21,911 --> 00:35:23,618
And you're like, "I'm invited."

764
00:35:23,705 --> 00:35:25,867
And he's, "I wonder about that."

765
00:35:26,041 --> 00:35:27,657
And you show them the proof!

766
00:35:27,751 --> 00:35:29,458
Always bring the wedding invite with you.

767
00:35:29,711 --> 00:35:31,703
- Then they can't kick you out.
- Okay.

768
00:35:31,880 --> 00:35:34,497
But you'll be sad ultimately
knowing that she's not with you,

769
00:35:35,467 --> 00:35:38,710
and you want to prepare yourself
with, like, a mixtape of sad songs.

770
00:35:38,928 --> 00:35:41,716
Anything from Chicago
is usually pretty good.

771
00:35:49,230 --> 00:35:50,437
I don't really know that song.

772
00:35:55,654 --> 00:35:57,896
Wait! No, no, no! Dylan,

773
00:35:58,657 --> 00:36:00,523
that is the worst advice
anyone could give you.

774
00:36:00,742 --> 00:36:02,028
Listen to your dad, please.

775
00:36:02,118 --> 00:36:03,984
It's okay, Dad.
We don't have to talk about it.

776
00:36:04,079 --> 00:36:05,991
No, no, buddy, buddy, wait, wait, look!

777
00:36:06,081 --> 00:36:07,947
Hey, this stuff is all about confidence.

778
00:36:08,208 --> 00:36:10,416
You just got to believe you're the best
she's ever gonna find.

779
00:36:10,502 --> 00:36:13,245
You believe that to your core,
and she will, too, I promise you.

780
00:36:13,380 --> 00:36:14,496
But what if she doesn't?

781
00:36:14,589 --> 00:36:16,751
Buddy, you can't be afraid of rejection.

782
00:36:16,925 --> 00:36:18,006
You'll never find love

783
00:36:18,093 --> 00:36:19,629
if you're too scared to
put yourself out there.

784
00:36:20,095 --> 00:36:21,211
Hey, Goggles?

785
00:36:21,388 --> 00:36:22,504
Mistletoe is your ticket.

786
00:36:22,597 --> 00:36:25,089
You walk right up to her,
you dangle this over her head,

787
00:36:25,266 --> 00:36:27,633
and then you slap
your spaghetti suckers right on her.

788
00:36:27,769 --> 00:36:28,976
I don't know if that's appropriate.

789
00:36:29,104 --> 00:36:31,767
It's a time-honored holiday tradition,
Mr. War-On-Christmas.

790
00:36:32,399 --> 00:36:34,231
Then you give her a nice smack
on the caboose

791
00:36:34,317 --> 00:36:35,933
and tell her what a lucky girl she is.

792
00:36:36,027 --> 00:36:37,859
- Don't listen to that part, all right?
- Yeah, don't listen to that part.

793
00:36:37,946 --> 00:36:39,357
Look at me. Look at me.

794
00:36:39,447 --> 00:36:40,858
You want to be like Brad
and be in the Friend Zone,

795
00:36:40,949 --> 00:36:42,156
or you wanna be Dad
and get in the end zone?

796
00:36:42,409 --> 00:36:43,991
This worked for me when I was your age.

797
00:36:44,119 --> 00:36:45,235
You want to go for it, buddy?

798
00:36:46,955 --> 00:36:48,287
Come on, you can do this.

799
00:37:00,385 --> 00:37:02,377
No! I like Brad's way more.

800
00:37:02,470 --> 00:37:05,133
I just want to be her friend
and listen to her problems!

801
00:37:13,189 --> 00:37:16,182
My tree, my tree, my tree, my tree.

802
00:37:16,317 --> 00:37:17,433
My tree, my tree.

803
00:37:17,527 --> 00:37:18,517
Can I yell "Timber"?

804
00:37:18,611 --> 00:37:20,477
- Sure can, sweetheart.
- Yay!

805
00:37:20,572 --> 00:37:21,733
Is this okay?

806
00:37:21,823 --> 00:37:24,236
Are any of these trees
even gonna fit in the cabin?

807
00:37:24,409 --> 00:37:26,025
We're gonna cut off the top 25 feet

808
00:37:26,161 --> 00:37:28,027
and chop the rest up for firewood, Don.

809
00:37:29,414 --> 00:37:31,326
Now, this is the Duster Buster I remember.

810
00:37:31,416 --> 00:37:34,659
A certified badass
that makes his own rules!

811
00:37:35,336 --> 00:37:37,328
Go find a good tree, would you?

812
00:37:38,506 --> 00:37:40,919
Boy, I don't know about this, Kurt.

813
00:37:41,009 --> 00:37:43,342
Isn't it illegal to harvest
a tree from public lands?

814
00:37:43,678 --> 00:37:45,635
Hell, yeah. It's a federal crime.

815
00:37:45,805 --> 00:37:48,718
I tried to talk him out of it,
but you know how stubborn that kid can be.

816
00:37:48,808 --> 00:37:50,049
Okay.

817
00:37:50,643 --> 00:37:53,977
Dusty, look, I know you're upset
about Dylan, but I just...

818
00:37:54,063 --> 00:37:57,056
I told you, Brad, I'm not upset,
all right? We're co-dads!

819
00:37:57,233 --> 00:37:59,816
If he prefers your terrible advice,
fine, I'm cool with that.

820
00:38:00,028 --> 00:38:02,236
I just want to find the perfect
Together Christmas tree.

821
00:38:02,363 --> 00:38:04,070
Well, I just don't know if
it's the best choice, you know?

822
00:38:04,199 --> 00:38:07,488
Well, maybe we're not always gonna do
everything your way every time.

823
00:38:07,911 --> 00:38:09,243
Trouble in paradise, fellas?

824
00:38:09,412 --> 00:38:11,574
- No, we're picking a tree.
- Just having a conversation.

825
00:38:12,499 --> 00:38:14,240
El Padre!

826
00:38:14,667 --> 00:38:15,657
Lookit!

827
00:38:15,835 --> 00:38:17,792
Hey, what, kids?
What, you find a dead squirrel?

828
00:38:18,546 --> 00:38:20,082
We don't have to do things my way.

829
00:38:20,173 --> 00:38:21,163
- Really?
- Yeah.

830
00:38:21,257 --> 00:38:22,293
What about baseball snack?

831
00:38:22,383 --> 00:38:24,591
I just wanted to give out Fruit Roll-Ups,
and what's the big deal?

832
00:38:24,677 --> 00:38:27,090
No, I just feel like organic
fruit is much more nutritious

833
00:38:27,222 --> 00:38:28,508
than its rolled-up counterpart.

834
00:38:28,598 --> 00:38:29,634
- Yeah?
- Yeah.

835
00:38:29,724 --> 00:38:32,137
And what about Megan's diorama?
You didn't want to use any of my ideas.

836
00:38:32,227 --> 00:38:33,638
Your only idea was the Bay of Pigs!

837
00:38:33,728 --> 00:38:35,310
But it's an important event
in our nation's history!

838
00:38:35,396 --> 00:38:36,386
It was bloody.

839
00:38:36,481 --> 00:38:39,224
You wanted her to do green energy
so you could look Mr. Perfect Dad.

840
00:38:39,400 --> 00:38:41,608
- I'm not Mr. Perfect Dad.
- You act like Mr. Perfect Dad.

841
00:38:41,694 --> 00:38:42,855
I'm not Mr. Perfect Dad.

842
00:38:42,946 --> 00:38:44,153
And we don't have to do things my way.

843
00:38:44,239 --> 00:38:45,855
- Yeah?
- Yeah.

844
00:38:47,617 --> 00:38:49,825
Okay. You don't think
I can operate a chainsaw, do you?

845
00:38:50,245 --> 00:38:53,488
Guess who got his woodlands
management badge in Webelos.

846
00:38:53,790 --> 00:38:55,952
I did! Brad Whitaker.

847
00:38:59,254 --> 00:39:02,873
Dusty, look at this one.
Perfectly symmetrical.

848
00:39:03,424 --> 00:39:04,414
Okay.

849
00:39:07,929 --> 00:39:09,090
Yeah.

850
00:39:09,180 --> 00:39:10,921
Keep an eye out for rangers!

851
00:39:11,266 --> 00:39:14,475
I've got to pinpoint
a 60 degree angle top cut.

852
00:39:15,311 --> 00:39:17,678
That's what I'm gonna do first.

853
00:39:19,190 --> 00:39:21,102
Yeah! She's cutting like butter!

854
00:39:22,443 --> 00:39:24,309
Hey, Brad, isn't that a...

855
00:39:34,205 --> 00:39:35,286
Hold it, hold it!

856
00:39:36,374 --> 00:39:37,910
Timber!

857
00:39:42,505 --> 00:39:44,371
Brad, you cut down a cell phone tower.

858
00:39:45,008 --> 00:39:46,624
Why'd you cut down a cell phone tower?

859
00:39:47,010 --> 00:39:48,717
No bars? No bars?

860
00:39:51,764 --> 00:39:53,300
- That was excellent!
- Get up.

861
00:39:53,391 --> 00:39:55,132
- You really stuck that landing, man.
- Would you get up?

862
00:39:55,310 --> 00:39:56,972
I'd give you a 9.2 on my card.

863
00:39:57,312 --> 00:39:59,304
- Brad, get up.
- I think Brad's dead again.

864
00:39:59,606 --> 00:40:01,017
Man, you killed the poor bastard!

865
00:40:01,733 --> 00:40:03,144
Brad, don't go into the light!

866
00:40:03,318 --> 00:40:05,560
It's okay, sweetheart.
El Padre will bring him back.

867
00:40:05,737 --> 00:40:07,194
- Stand clear.
- I got it, all right?

868
00:40:07,322 --> 00:40:08,779
It's your fault we're even out here.

869
00:40:08,907 --> 00:40:11,115
You're getting in our heads
and starting static between me and Brad.

870
00:40:11,200 --> 00:40:13,567
There's plenty of static
between you and Brad already.

871
00:40:13,786 --> 00:40:16,403
And you know what?
Deep down, you want him dead, don't you?

872
00:40:16,497 --> 00:40:17,533
You can say it.

873
00:40:17,665 --> 00:40:19,873
We all want him dead. I want him dead.
Everybody does.

874
00:40:20,001 --> 00:40:21,367
- What?
- Come on, admit it.

875
00:40:21,502 --> 00:40:23,869
Why don't you admit
why you invited yourself to Christmas?

876
00:40:23,963 --> 00:40:25,545
Well, why don't you tell me, smart guy?

877
00:40:25,673 --> 00:40:26,959
'Cause you knew I was back here
trying to be a good dad,

878
00:40:27,050 --> 00:40:29,133
be around for my kids
the way you never were for me.

879
00:40:29,218 --> 00:40:30,834
That's why you want to crap all over it.

880
00:40:30,970 --> 00:40:32,211
Get up, Brad!

881
00:40:33,890 --> 00:40:35,176
Oh, my God, what happened?

882
00:40:35,350 --> 00:40:36,932
You cut down a cell phone tower, Brad.

883
00:40:37,101 --> 00:40:38,558
You know, you're right.

884
00:40:38,686 --> 00:40:40,018
I did invite myself to Christmas.

885
00:40:41,189 --> 00:40:42,521
But that's because you never do.

886
00:40:45,443 --> 00:40:47,526
I feel like I died again.
Did I die again?

887
00:40:47,695 --> 00:40:48,936
A little bit. Come on.

888
00:40:52,784 --> 00:40:54,616
Okay. Our report's all squared away.

889
00:40:54,702 --> 00:40:56,284
Yimmy, Bill, thank you guys so much

890
00:40:56,371 --> 00:40:57,907
for the understanding.
We really appreciate it.

891
00:40:57,997 --> 00:41:00,239
I'm so sorry.
I'm truly embarrassed.

892
00:41:00,375 --> 00:41:02,412
No, hey. It was an honest mistake.

893
00:41:02,543 --> 00:41:03,659
Okay, you're all set.

894
00:41:03,753 --> 00:41:06,541
Okay, we'd better get back to the site
and lock it down.

895
00:41:06,756 --> 00:41:08,713
Hold on one second.

896
00:41:09,550 --> 00:41:12,418
Is there any way
we could do better than $20,000?

897
00:41:12,553 --> 00:41:15,011
Can't you reuse some
of the antenna equipment?

898
00:41:15,264 --> 00:41:18,678
Sorry, no. These old 4G units
are obsolete already.

899
00:41:18,768 --> 00:41:20,634
That's why you're getting
this one so cheap!

900
00:41:20,728 --> 00:41:22,515
- It looks really nice, though.
- It sure does.

901
00:41:22,605 --> 00:41:24,938
Hey, guys, keep it up, it looks great.
Happy Holidays.

902
00:41:25,274 --> 00:41:26,765
Happy Christmas, guys. Thanks.

903
00:41:26,901 --> 00:41:29,860
Please tell me you did not just spend
$20,000 on a Christmas tree?

904
00:41:30,405 --> 00:41:32,772
Twenty thousand dollars.
"Can you hear me now?"

905
00:41:33,950 --> 00:41:35,236
You want some eggnog?

906
00:41:38,955 --> 00:41:40,071
- Yummy.
- Hey!

907
00:41:40,206 --> 00:41:41,742
- I want some!
- Me, too!

908
00:41:41,874 --> 00:41:43,536
Now, girls, that's a grown-up drink.

909
00:41:43,626 --> 00:41:45,333
Yes. Thank you, Karen.

910
00:41:45,586 --> 00:41:47,077
So we're only gonna have one.

911
00:41:47,296 --> 00:41:48,503
What? No, no, no!

912
00:41:48,631 --> 00:41:50,418
There's rum in there, so not any.

913
00:41:53,636 --> 00:41:55,172
Are you writing about me?

914
00:41:55,430 --> 00:41:56,591
All right. Somebody want to plug her in?

915
00:41:56,806 --> 00:41:58,047
Yeah, I got it.

916
00:41:59,934 --> 00:42:01,095
Cool!

917
00:42:02,228 --> 00:42:03,685
That's weird.

918
00:42:23,458 --> 00:42:24,619
What do you think?

919
00:42:26,002 --> 00:42:27,334
It's so pretty.

920
00:42:27,462 --> 00:42:29,920
Well, it ought to be
at 1,200 bucks a foot.

921
00:42:30,089 --> 00:42:32,081
Dad, we're lighting the tree!

922
00:42:32,216 --> 00:42:33,206
Where's my dad?

923
00:42:33,301 --> 00:42:35,293
Yeah, I thought it was
a little quiet around here.

924
00:42:35,386 --> 00:42:36,627
- Pop-Pop?
- Don?

925
00:42:36,846 --> 00:42:37,927
Pop-Pop?

926
00:42:39,057 --> 00:42:40,389
Is he still outside?

927
00:42:43,644 --> 00:42:45,476
Dad!

928
00:42:46,397 --> 00:42:47,729
Dad?

929
00:42:48,816 --> 00:42:49,852
Dad?

930
00:42:50,568 --> 00:42:51,900
Brad!

931
00:42:52,111 --> 00:42:53,898
Dad! Where are you?

932
00:42:54,072 --> 00:42:56,189
- I found him! Where are you?
- I don't know.

933
00:42:56,407 --> 00:42:58,194
- Are you hurt?
- No, no!

934
00:42:58,284 --> 00:43:00,822
No, I just can't quite get up.

935
00:43:02,705 --> 00:43:04,162
Dad, don't move.

936
00:43:04,248 --> 00:43:05,534
There's a pack of wolves on you.

937
00:43:06,292 --> 00:43:07,828
- Is that what it is?
- Yeah.

938
00:43:08,169 --> 00:43:10,331
I can feel something
tugging at my trousers.

939
00:43:10,505 --> 00:43:13,043
- What color are they, Brad?
- They're gray wolves.

940
00:43:13,216 --> 00:43:15,299
That'll be Canis lupus.
They're dangerous.

941
00:43:15,468 --> 00:43:17,755
Really? They look like you could
just reach out and pet them.

942
00:43:17,929 --> 00:43:19,261
I kind of want to pet them, Dad.

943
00:43:19,430 --> 00:43:22,013
Now, Brad. Don't make eye contact
with the alpha wolf.

944
00:43:22,141 --> 00:43:24,349
I already did! Right in the eyes.

945
00:43:24,477 --> 00:43:25,934
Don't show any fear.

946
00:43:26,104 --> 00:43:28,061
I don't want to watch the wolves eat you!

947
00:43:28,231 --> 00:43:30,063
Breathe deep and pull yourself together.

948
00:43:30,233 --> 00:43:31,474
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

949
00:43:31,692 --> 00:43:32,682
Hut!

950
00:43:34,904 --> 00:43:36,566
Hut! Hurt!

951
00:43:36,906 --> 00:43:38,488
Are you saying "hut" or "hurt"?

952
00:43:38,616 --> 00:43:39,732
Dad, what happened?

953
00:43:40,243 --> 00:43:43,281
You know, I saw the nicest tree
a ways off,

954
00:43:43,371 --> 00:43:45,658
and I got a little off course.

955
00:43:45,748 --> 00:43:48,491
I tried to call you,
but all of a sudden my signal dropped!

956
00:43:48,626 --> 00:43:49,616
Really?

957
00:43:49,710 --> 00:43:50,871
I tried to find my way back,

958
00:43:51,045 --> 00:43:53,879
but at some point I lost consciousness.

959
00:43:53,965 --> 00:43:56,958
That's about when the wolves
must have come across me.

960
00:43:57,301 --> 00:43:58,291
It's all right, fellas.

961
00:43:58,386 --> 00:44:00,503
You didn't have to go to any trouble.
It's all good.

962
00:44:06,602 --> 00:44:08,889
I'm sorry for all the hugs.

963
00:44:09,647 --> 00:44:10,933
I kind of don't want to let go.

964
00:44:11,065 --> 00:44:14,229
I almost thought I'd lost you out there
to those nasty wolves.

965
00:44:14,485 --> 00:44:16,351
Do you have any idea
how much I love you?

966
00:44:16,445 --> 00:44:19,734
Well, of course I do.
You tweet about it every day.

967
00:44:19,907 --> 00:44:22,069
You know how much I love you, too,
don't you?

968
00:44:22,493 --> 00:44:24,985
Your answer is right in here.

969
00:44:25,830 --> 00:44:27,162
I can see it!

970
00:44:28,374 --> 00:44:30,866
Okay, now that everyone is accounted for,

971
00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:34,419
can we please talk about who is paying
for that monstrosity?

972
00:44:34,922 --> 00:44:37,539
Well, you know, it was Dusty's idea
to cut down the tree.

973
00:44:37,758 --> 00:44:40,125
Yeah, and it was your idea
to cut down the cell phone tower, Brad.

974
00:44:40,303 --> 00:44:42,590
Great, so as per usual
we get stuck paying.

975
00:44:42,763 --> 00:44:44,846
- Wait, what does that mean?
- I think it's a nice tree.

976
00:44:44,932 --> 00:44:46,798
I don't know. Dylan's retainer?
Megan's flute?

977
00:44:46,934 --> 00:44:48,846
What about Tae Kwon Do
that you signed them up for

978
00:44:48,936 --> 00:44:50,177
and didn't even ask us about?

979
00:44:50,313 --> 00:44:52,646
Yes, and who paid for the trip
to the aquarium last week?

980
00:44:52,815 --> 00:44:54,022
It's a really nice tree.

981
00:44:54,108 --> 00:44:55,098
So now we're keeping score, huh?

982
00:44:55,193 --> 00:44:57,776
Well, who paid for the parking
and bought each one of them a blowup orca?

983
00:44:57,862 --> 00:44:59,945
After we told them they
couldn't have a blowup orca!

984
00:45:00,031 --> 00:45:02,193
Yeah, because you were too cheap
to buy them a blowup orca!

985
00:45:02,283 --> 00:45:04,400
Who crushed my car with a snow blower?
You did, Brad.

986
00:45:04,535 --> 00:45:05,821
Who crushed my car with a motorcycle?

987
00:45:05,953 --> 00:45:06,943
Hello! You again!

988
00:45:07,121 --> 00:45:08,111
Hey!

989
00:45:08,247 --> 00:45:09,488
It's a beautiful tree!

990
00:45:09,582 --> 00:45:11,539
It's beautiful, all right?

991
00:45:12,126 --> 00:45:14,209
Okay, yeah. Dad's right.

992
00:45:15,213 --> 00:45:16,704
It's a beautiful tree.

993
00:45:20,801 --> 00:45:23,384
Don, I'm sorry, I don't think
I'm gonna be able to save the foot.

994
00:45:23,471 --> 00:45:24,507
Yeah, that baby's coming off.

995
00:45:24,597 --> 00:45:26,338
I'll need some morphine and a bread knife.

996
00:45:26,599 --> 00:45:27,806
Brad, hold him down.

997
00:45:28,059 --> 00:45:30,051
No. That's just my feet.

998
00:45:30,228 --> 00:45:32,140
It's the mail carrier's curse.

999
00:45:32,313 --> 00:45:34,555
Back when I used to sleep with your mom,

1000
00:45:34,732 --> 00:45:38,976
I once scratched her leg so bad
with a piece of rogue heel skin,

1001
00:45:39,153 --> 00:45:40,519
it actually drew blood.

1002
00:45:40,696 --> 00:45:42,983
What do you mean,
used to sleep with Ginny?

1003
00:45:43,324 --> 00:45:44,531
What?

1004
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:48,152
We sleep in separate bedrooms.

1005
00:45:48,287 --> 00:45:50,700
You know how badly I snore, Brad.

1006
00:45:51,207 --> 00:45:53,164
Boy, that is inspiring!

1007
00:45:53,417 --> 00:45:57,252
You know? The way you're always
so considerate to the other person.

1008
00:45:59,757 --> 00:46:01,749
I really want to take this foot off.

1009
00:46:11,185 --> 00:46:12,266
Hey, sweetie.

1010
00:46:12,645 --> 00:46:13,977
You know, you might want to
close your window.

1011
00:46:14,063 --> 00:46:15,224
You know, since it's winter?

1012
00:46:15,398 --> 00:46:16,388
You're not my dad.

1013
00:46:16,482 --> 00:46:19,190
You know, I appreciate you
reminding me of that every few hours.

1014
00:46:19,277 --> 00:46:20,518
But, you know,
we're not the only people here,

1015
00:46:20,653 --> 00:46:23,236
so maybe we set the thermostat to like 75?

1016
00:46:23,447 --> 00:46:25,234
I mean, that's still really toasty, right?

1017
00:46:25,449 --> 00:46:26,530
85.

1018
00:46:26,617 --> 00:46:29,826
Okay, well, what if I counter you
at like 78?

1019
00:46:30,037 --> 00:46:32,324
And then you negotiate with me,
you come back at like 83,

1020
00:46:32,415 --> 00:46:33,906
and then maybe we settle at like 80.

1021
00:46:34,041 --> 00:46:35,498
- What do you say to that?
- 81.

1022
00:46:35,626 --> 00:46:36,662
Deal!

1023
00:46:36,752 --> 00:46:39,369
Look at that. The two of us
are starting to see eye to eye.

1024
00:46:39,463 --> 00:46:40,579
Thank you, sweetie.

1025
00:46:41,048 --> 00:46:42,084
Thank God.

1026
00:46:42,550 --> 00:46:45,213
There's Brad with some makeup cocoa
for being such a jerk.

1027
00:46:45,303 --> 00:46:46,464
Thank you.

1028
00:46:47,054 --> 00:46:49,467
- Brad! What are you doing?
- God.

1029
00:46:50,891 --> 00:46:52,883
- Why would you do that?
- Look what you made me do!

1030
00:46:52,977 --> 00:46:54,138
- I didn't do anything.
- I didn't make you do it!

1031
00:46:54,228 --> 00:46:55,560
I thought you were bringing me
hot makeup cocoa

1032
00:46:55,646 --> 00:46:56,853
and you just, like,
threw it all over yourself.

1033
00:46:56,981 --> 00:46:58,188
You almost burned me, Brad!

1034
00:46:58,274 --> 00:47:00,516
- I wasn't bringing you makeup cocoa.
- Why not?

1035
00:47:00,651 --> 00:47:02,142
I would've said, "Here, bud,
here's some makeup cocoa."

1036
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:04,403
- I've been waiting for my makeup cocoa.
- I didn't know that!

1037
00:47:04,530 --> 00:47:06,738
If I knew you wanted makeup cocoa,
I would've...

1038
00:47:07,158 --> 00:47:08,148
81!

1039
00:47:08,326 --> 00:47:09,407
No, no, don't touch that!

1040
00:47:09,493 --> 00:47:10,483
I talked her down from the high 80s.

1041
00:47:10,578 --> 00:47:12,285
I'm making progress with her.
This is good.

1042
00:47:12,413 --> 00:47:13,574
I thought you had your house in order.

1043
00:47:13,706 --> 00:47:14,867
Look, don't you see?

1044
00:47:14,999 --> 00:47:16,410
We're doing exactly what he wants.

1045
00:47:16,500 --> 00:47:17,741
We're letting things out of the harbor!

1046
00:47:17,877 --> 00:47:18,913
- So you are harboring.
- Of course I'm harboring!

1047
00:47:19,003 --> 00:47:19,993
And so are you.

1048
00:47:20,129 --> 00:47:22,416
Harboring was working just fine
before he showed up.

1049
00:47:22,548 --> 00:47:23,959
Let's get everything back in the harbor

1050
00:47:24,091 --> 00:47:26,333
and let's harbor it all back
in and close up the harbor.

1051
00:47:26,510 --> 00:47:27,626
I don't know if I can!

1052
00:47:27,803 --> 00:47:29,465
Remember you said
let's put the focus back on the kids?

1053
00:47:29,555 --> 00:47:31,137
That was a great idea!

1054
00:47:32,308 --> 00:47:35,426
- Fine. Harbor's closed.
- Good.

1055
00:47:35,644 --> 00:47:37,385
But we're going halfsies
on the cell tower.

1056
00:47:37,480 --> 00:47:39,096
Fine, halfsies on the cell tower.

1057
00:47:39,273 --> 00:47:40,809
Brad, are you okay?

1058
00:47:42,318 --> 00:47:43,308
Yeah.

1059
00:47:43,444 --> 00:47:45,936
- Did you make tee-tee in bed?
- No, it's cocoa.

1060
00:47:46,113 --> 00:47:47,854
Did your cocoa make you tee-tee in bed?

1061
00:47:48,032 --> 00:47:49,648
You're sleepwalking. Go back to sleep.

1062
00:47:49,742 --> 00:47:52,200
The big boy
doesn't have to be embarrassed.

1063
00:47:54,830 --> 00:47:56,662
How would I pee upwards?

1064
00:48:01,295 --> 00:48:02,627
7 and a half. 13.

1065
00:48:11,013 --> 00:48:12,094
- Pretty good.
- Yeah.

1066
00:48:12,181 --> 00:48:13,297
Better than before.

1067
00:48:13,391 --> 00:48:14,757
Yeah, the skip was really cool.

1068
00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:19,018
Hey. Do you mind? Bowler's etiquette.

1069
00:48:19,313 --> 00:48:21,225
- What do you mean?
- It means you're crowding me.

1070
00:48:21,357 --> 00:48:22,973
What? You can't bowl with me here?

1071
00:48:26,862 --> 00:48:27,943
That sounded like a strike.

1072
00:48:34,495 --> 00:48:35,827
How's your hearing?

1073
00:48:37,248 --> 00:48:39,160
- Dylan, come on, buddy, you're up!
- All right.

1074
00:48:39,333 --> 00:48:41,165
Let's go. Hey, come on.
You can do this, okay?

1075
00:48:43,254 --> 00:48:44,540
What's with the kiddie stuff?

1076
00:48:44,713 --> 00:48:45,920
- What? The rails?
- Yeah.

1077
00:48:46,090 --> 00:48:47,706
It's how the kids
learn how to bowl, Dad.

1078
00:48:47,842 --> 00:48:49,583
You learn by fearing the gutter.

1079
00:48:49,677 --> 00:48:50,793
Like in life, Dusty.

1080
00:48:50,970 --> 00:48:54,714
Now, Kurt. The rails help a young bowler
build a positive self-image.

1081
00:48:55,141 --> 00:48:56,973
Dylan, come here.

1082
00:48:58,102 --> 00:48:59,934
Do you want to bowl
with those sissy rails up,

1083
00:49:00,020 --> 00:49:02,262
or do you want to stand
and bowl like a man?

1084
00:49:03,607 --> 00:49:04,893
I don't need the rails, I guess.

1085
00:49:04,984 --> 00:49:06,065
Attaboy! I'm proud of you, kid.

1086
00:49:06,235 --> 00:49:08,147
Hey, I'm proud of you too,
big guy, all right?

1087
00:49:08,237 --> 00:49:09,978
Dylan's going without the rails.

1088
00:49:10,156 --> 00:49:12,569
No rails? All right, Dylan!

1089
00:49:12,741 --> 00:49:14,733
Don't be afraid to release it high.

1090
00:49:14,910 --> 00:49:15,991
Here we go.

1091
00:49:17,163 --> 00:49:18,370
Good try.

1092
00:49:18,706 --> 00:49:21,244
When he's up there with the tears
and "I suck at everything" business,

1093
00:49:21,375 --> 00:49:23,037
that's on you, Mr. School of Hard Knocks.

1094
00:49:23,127 --> 00:49:24,538
Hey, better than him
living in your basement

1095
00:49:24,628 --> 00:49:26,085
in 20 years, Mr. Sissy Rails.

1096
00:49:30,301 --> 00:49:31,792
Come on, buddy. Give it another shot.

1097
00:49:31,886 --> 00:49:33,718
Okay. New start, new beginning.
Here we go.

1098
00:49:38,934 --> 00:49:40,050
Yay!

1099
00:49:41,645 --> 00:49:42,852
Yeah.

1100
00:49:53,908 --> 00:49:56,491
Are we certain he understands the game?

1101
00:49:56,619 --> 00:49:58,986
He seems to almost be
trying to put it in the gutter.

1102
00:49:59,121 --> 00:50:00,737
I know. He needs to get
more height on the ball.

1103
00:50:16,597 --> 00:50:19,305
I hate this frickin' game!
It's so frickin' stupid!

1104
00:50:21,018 --> 00:50:22,634
Hey, everybody, check it out!

1105
00:50:22,770 --> 00:50:24,432
This kid's about to bowl a perfect zero.

1106
00:50:24,522 --> 00:50:25,512
Hey, mind your business!

1107
00:50:27,900 --> 00:50:29,937
Hey, how do you think this is gonna
make him feel about himself?

1108
00:50:30,027 --> 00:50:31,768
Well, this is character building.

1109
00:50:31,862 --> 00:50:33,273
Even the ridicule.

1110
00:50:33,864 --> 00:50:35,605
- Come on, bud.
- Come on, Dylan!

1111
00:50:36,033 --> 00:50:37,365
It's okay.

1112
00:50:37,785 --> 00:50:39,526
I suck at everything!

1113
00:50:39,620 --> 00:50:41,703
I quit, I quit!

1114
00:50:42,456 --> 00:50:44,948
Hey. Hey, kid, listen.

1115
00:50:46,919 --> 00:50:49,787
We Mayron men might not always show up.

1116
00:50:50,130 --> 00:50:52,122
I mean, we want to show up, we intend to,

1117
00:50:52,216 --> 00:50:54,128
but sometimes,
we get trashed the night before,

1118
00:50:54,218 --> 00:50:55,709
or we wreck a speedboat,

1119
00:50:55,803 --> 00:50:58,386
or hook up with
some Emirates flight attendants

1120
00:50:58,472 --> 00:51:01,215
and somehow end up on a redeye to Dubai.

1121
00:51:01,934 --> 00:51:02,924
You know what I mean.

1122
00:51:03,561 --> 00:51:05,518
The point is, we may not always show up,

1123
00:51:05,646 --> 00:51:08,309
but when we do, we finish what we start.

1124
00:51:08,649 --> 00:51:10,732
Now you get up there and grab those balls.

1125
00:51:16,407 --> 00:51:17,523
Come on, you got this.

1126
00:51:26,250 --> 00:51:27,457
Go, bro!

1127
00:51:27,876 --> 00:51:29,708
I'll take that.

1128
00:51:30,421 --> 00:51:31,537
I'll cover that.

1129
00:51:34,091 --> 00:51:35,548
Come on, honey!

1130
00:51:36,844 --> 00:51:38,676
- Come on, buddy.
- You can do it, kid.

1131
00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:52,891
Please. Please.

1132
00:52:09,209 --> 00:52:10,199
I did it!

1133
00:52:12,880 --> 00:52:14,997
Thanks for believing in me, El Padre!

1134
00:52:15,090 --> 00:52:17,878
You bet, buddy! I knew you had it in you!

1135
00:52:19,928 --> 00:52:22,341
You're a winner! You're a winner!

1136
00:52:24,350 --> 00:52:25,340
I did it!

1137
00:52:33,275 --> 00:52:34,516
Hey, where were you guys?

1138
00:52:34,610 --> 00:52:35,896
We're almost at
the front of the line here.

1139
00:52:35,986 --> 00:52:38,603
We were at the Starbucks
checking out the local talent.

1140
00:52:38,739 --> 00:52:41,231
Cute little number at the next table
was giving this one the eye.

1141
00:52:41,325 --> 00:52:43,908
And El Padre got a phone number
from the lady who made the coffees.

1142
00:52:43,994 --> 00:52:45,155
We got free ones!

1143
00:52:47,831 --> 00:52:50,164
- I drink coffee now.
- What? Get in here.

1144
00:52:50,542 --> 00:52:51,703
Big jump!

1145
00:52:51,794 --> 00:52:54,286
Welcome to the North Pole!

1146
00:52:57,091 --> 00:52:59,549
Hey, honey, are you sure you don't want
to go see Santa with the boys?

1147
00:52:59,635 --> 00:53:01,126
You were so excited.

1148
00:53:03,097 --> 00:53:05,180
Mom, Santa is so lame.

1149
00:53:06,266 --> 00:53:08,349
- Come on.
- He can hear you, you know!

1150
00:53:10,229 --> 00:53:11,765
You know, I'm sorry...

1151
00:53:12,815 --> 00:53:16,104
My daughter thinks that
your daughter is amazing.

1152
00:53:16,652 --> 00:53:17,859
That's sweet.

1153
00:53:19,154 --> 00:53:21,191
Which is cute, you're right,

1154
00:53:21,281 --> 00:53:23,819
but sometimes
when Adrianna does certain things,

1155
00:53:23,951 --> 00:53:26,694
then Megan thinks that it's okay to do it
because you said that...

1156
00:53:31,959 --> 00:53:32,949
Oh, my God.

1157
00:53:33,877 --> 00:53:35,493
Are you really stealing right now?

1158
00:53:35,587 --> 00:53:37,249
Sometimes I shoplift a little bit.

1159
00:53:37,339 --> 00:53:38,580
It's exciting!

1160
00:53:39,717 --> 00:53:42,380
No! I mean... Okay, yeah,
it's a little exciting.

1161
00:53:42,469 --> 00:53:44,256
My heart's really beating out of my chest.

1162
00:53:44,346 --> 00:53:46,429
What if we get caught?
You got to put it back!

1163
00:53:46,515 --> 00:53:47,505
You're so obedient.

1164
00:53:47,599 --> 00:53:49,340
You're always following
the rules, you know.

1165
00:53:49,435 --> 00:53:50,471
Come on, Sara.

1166
00:53:50,561 --> 00:53:52,052
Have a little fun with me. Relax.

1167
00:53:52,146 --> 00:53:54,103
I mean, I would love
to have a little fun with you,

1168
00:53:54,189 --> 00:53:56,647
but I just want you to know,
I am not obedient, okay?

1169
00:53:56,734 --> 00:53:59,192
- Then put this in your pants.
- No. No, thank you.

1170
00:53:59,278 --> 00:54:01,520
And don't touch my boobs. It's weird.

1171
00:54:01,613 --> 00:54:04,026
Stop it! I'm not going to shoplift!

1172
00:54:04,158 --> 00:54:05,569
- Why not?
- Because...

1173
00:54:06,076 --> 00:54:08,068
Because you're about to see why.

1174
00:54:08,162 --> 00:54:09,824
- Pardon me, miss?
- Yes?

1175
00:54:09,913 --> 00:54:11,700
- Is this woman bothering you?
- What?

1176
00:54:12,166 --> 00:54:15,409
She's a little judgmental,
but she's fine. Thank you.

1177
00:54:15,711 --> 00:54:17,168
No worries.

1178
00:54:24,928 --> 00:54:26,590
Welcome to the North Pole!

1179
00:54:26,680 --> 00:54:28,467
And what do you want for Christmas?

1180
00:54:35,022 --> 00:54:36,433
I didn't miss it. Hi!

1181
00:54:36,523 --> 00:54:38,765
Right there. This is a great shot.

1182
00:54:38,859 --> 00:54:41,192
- Are you getting it, honey?
- Yeah, I got a good one.

1183
00:54:41,278 --> 00:54:42,485
That's a great shot.

1184
00:54:43,197 --> 00:54:44,187
Thank you, Santa.

1185
00:54:44,281 --> 00:54:45,647
- You're welcome!
- Hi, honey.

1186
00:54:45,741 --> 00:54:47,277
What about you, big brother?

1187
00:54:47,367 --> 00:54:49,484
I'm sure you've been good.
What's on your list?

1188
00:54:49,787 --> 00:54:51,528
I kind of want

1189
00:54:51,830 --> 00:54:53,241
a 20-gauge shotgun,

1190
00:54:53,373 --> 00:54:55,160
so I can go turkey hunting
with my El Padre!

1191
00:54:55,250 --> 00:54:56,741
What the heck?
Where'd he come up with that?

1192
00:54:56,835 --> 00:54:58,042
Did he just ask for a firearm?

1193
00:54:58,128 --> 00:55:00,245
Sure did! 20-gauge. Kid knows his guns.

1194
00:55:00,380 --> 00:55:02,042
Kurt, we've already been through this.
Dusty and I...

1195
00:55:02,132 --> 00:55:04,044
Yeah, it is final. That's it.
It's not happening.

1196
00:55:04,134 --> 00:55:06,251
Really? Because I don't remember
being part of that discussion.

1197
00:55:06,386 --> 00:55:09,595
Or am I just some little obedient wife
who does whatever the men folk say?

1198
00:55:09,932 --> 00:55:11,719
Yeah, that doesn't seem quite fair to me.

1199
00:55:11,809 --> 00:55:12,799
Piss off, Kurt.

1200
00:55:12,893 --> 00:55:14,555
Honey, he's talking about a gun.

1201
00:55:14,645 --> 00:55:17,137
If I may, can I just

1202
00:55:17,523 --> 00:55:20,231
have a word with my grandson?

1203
00:55:21,068 --> 00:55:24,561
I just want you to fully understand
what you're asking for.

1204
00:55:24,655 --> 00:55:27,773
To take a gun into the wilderness,

1205
00:55:28,075 --> 00:55:30,658
find an animal living free,

1206
00:55:30,744 --> 00:55:32,906
and take away its life.

1207
00:55:32,996 --> 00:55:34,862
So that it can never breathe or run

1208
00:55:35,791 --> 00:55:37,908
or play ever again.

1209
00:55:38,836 --> 00:55:40,623
Now, is that what you really want?

1210
00:55:40,712 --> 00:55:42,078
Yes.

1211
00:55:42,631 --> 00:55:44,463
No. I don't want to do that.

1212
00:55:45,008 --> 00:55:46,249
You have a good heart, Dylan.

1213
00:55:47,177 --> 00:55:48,918
I'll do it! I'll kill a turkey!

1214
00:55:49,012 --> 00:55:50,674
Can I shoot one? Please?

1215
00:55:51,974 --> 00:55:53,966
I'll have one shotgun, please, Santa.

1216
00:55:54,101 --> 00:55:55,967
And gobs and gobs of bullets.

1217
00:55:56,103 --> 00:55:58,186
No, no, no, cupcake. No, I'm sorry.

1218
00:55:58,272 --> 00:56:01,936
No, the men do the hunting.
You ladies cook what we kill.

1219
00:56:02,442 --> 00:56:03,432
Excuse me?

1220
00:56:05,112 --> 00:56:06,774
Yeah, excuse you?

1221
00:56:07,114 --> 00:56:09,026
Here, turkey, turkey, turkey!

1222
00:56:09,116 --> 00:56:10,323
Be patient, sweetheart.

1223
00:56:10,450 --> 00:56:11,611
The decoys are right around the corner.

1224
00:56:11,702 --> 00:56:12,988
This is nice, Dust?

1225
00:56:13,120 --> 00:56:15,703
You and me, the fresh air.
Just like old times.

1226
00:56:15,789 --> 00:56:17,030
What do you mean "just like old times"?

1227
00:56:17,124 --> 00:56:18,285
You only took me once, Dad.

1228
00:56:18,500 --> 00:56:19,616
Jeez, I don't know.

1229
00:56:19,710 --> 00:56:21,667
Are you sure this is a good idea, Sara?

1230
00:56:21,753 --> 00:56:23,585
Megan is a strong independent woman.

1231
00:56:23,672 --> 00:56:25,709
If she wants to help thin
the wild turkey population

1232
00:56:25,799 --> 00:56:27,961
so that they don't starve to death
in the winter,

1233
00:56:28,051 --> 00:56:29,587
that is her right by the Second Amendment.

1234
00:56:29,678 --> 00:56:31,590
Boy, you bought into that real quick.

1235
00:56:31,680 --> 00:56:32,716
I mean, I think for Megan,

1236
00:56:32,806 --> 00:56:35,640
this is less about wildlife conservation
and more about bloodlust.

1237
00:56:35,726 --> 00:56:38,343
Looks like somebody picked
the wrong day to be a turkey.

1238
00:56:38,770 --> 00:56:41,262
Keep your elbow down
and cradle the stock, okay.

1239
00:56:41,356 --> 00:56:42,346
Yeah, I get it.

1240
00:56:42,482 --> 00:56:43,939
Can I shoot the damn thing or not?

1241
00:56:44,026 --> 00:56:45,483
Yeah, that's the spirit.

1242
00:56:45,777 --> 00:56:47,313
Take a deep breath,

1243
00:56:47,529 --> 00:56:50,613
and then squeeze that trigger
as you're letting it out.

1244
00:56:52,200 --> 00:56:54,066
Megan, are you sure
this is what you want to do?

1245
00:56:54,828 --> 00:56:55,818
Let's name it.

1246
00:56:55,913 --> 00:56:57,495
She's not gonna kill it if it has a name.

1247
00:56:57,581 --> 00:56:59,698
- Yes! Gertrude.
- Sam? Tom?

1248
00:57:00,250 --> 00:57:01,582
Billie Holiday! No.

1249
00:57:01,668 --> 00:57:02,875
- Elijah.
- Elijah!

1250
00:57:02,961 --> 00:57:04,748
- Elijah, run home!
- Stand your ground, kid.

1251
00:57:04,838 --> 00:57:05,828
Save yourself, Elijah!

1252
00:57:05,923 --> 00:57:06,959
Take the shot, kid. Take the shot.

1253
00:57:07,049 --> 00:57:08,210
No, Elijah has feelings!

1254
00:57:08,342 --> 00:57:09,503
Take the shot!

1255
00:57:11,428 --> 00:57:12,509
Oh, God!

1256
00:57:12,971 --> 00:57:13,961
Dad!

1257
00:57:14,056 --> 00:57:16,343
Oh, my God. Honey, are you okay?

1258
00:57:16,433 --> 00:57:17,423
- Kurt!
- Dad, Dad, are you all right?

1259
00:57:17,517 --> 00:57:18,883
I'm okay. She just winged me.

1260
00:57:18,977 --> 00:57:20,434
I'm sorry, El Padre! I'm sorry.

1261
00:57:20,520 --> 00:57:23,103
That's okay, kid. I've been shot
worse than this plenty of times.

1262
00:57:23,190 --> 00:57:24,806
Make your scarf into a tourniquet.

1263
00:57:24,900 --> 00:57:26,516
Wrap it around his shoulder.

1264
00:57:26,610 --> 00:57:28,146
Lift his legs!

1265
00:57:28,236 --> 00:57:30,193
- You'll be fine, sweetheart.
- I'm gonna bleed out.

1266
00:57:37,829 --> 00:57:38,819
Wow.

1267
00:57:39,122 --> 00:57:40,329
Two for two.

1268
00:57:40,415 --> 00:57:41,656
Makes getting shot worth it.

1269
00:57:41,750 --> 00:57:43,286
Get the birds, Brad.

1270
00:57:43,377 --> 00:57:45,539
God! I don't know who this child is.

1271
00:57:45,629 --> 00:57:46,961
You get that one.

1272
00:57:55,555 --> 00:57:57,217
What? I know, okay?

1273
00:57:57,557 --> 00:57:59,719
It's on me.
I'm the worst mom in the world.

1274
00:57:59,935 --> 00:58:03,394
I put a gun in my daughter's hand,
and then she nearly killed somebody.

1275
00:58:03,647 --> 00:58:05,764
She's gonna be scarred for life.

1276
00:58:06,441 --> 00:58:07,522
Hi!

1277
00:58:07,609 --> 00:58:08,895
I just shot a turkey and a man.

1278
00:58:09,611 --> 00:58:11,227
Guess which one's dead.

1279
00:58:16,159 --> 00:58:18,902
Okay, fine, maybe
she's a little too unscarred.

1280
00:58:18,996 --> 00:58:20,032
Jeez.

1281
00:58:24,960 --> 00:58:26,622
- You all right?
- Yeah, good.

1282
00:58:26,753 --> 00:58:29,166
All right. So, listen, the doctor said
everything is gonna be all right.

1283
00:58:29,297 --> 00:58:30,959
He just wants to keep you
for a couple of hours

1284
00:58:31,049 --> 00:58:32,165
to watch your blood pressure.

1285
00:58:32,259 --> 00:58:33,875
I'm fine. Where's my pants?

1286
00:58:33,969 --> 00:58:35,801
Hey. I forgot. Nothing ever hurts you.

1287
00:58:35,887 --> 00:58:37,253
Why don't we just round up all the nurses?

1288
00:58:37,347 --> 00:58:38,383
We can bring them in here.

1289
00:58:38,473 --> 00:58:39,634
You could do some pushups for them,

1290
00:58:39,766 --> 00:58:40,847
maybe bench press the couch a little bit,

1291
00:58:40,934 --> 00:58:41,924
prove you're still a tough guy.

1292
00:58:42,019 --> 00:58:43,430
Still tough enough to lick you, Junior.

1293
00:58:44,438 --> 00:58:45,645
- Was that a scoff?
- I didn't scoff.

1294
00:58:45,772 --> 00:58:46,979
Yeah, I heard you scoff just then.

1295
00:58:47,065 --> 00:58:48,101
All right, I scoffed. So what?

1296
00:58:48,191 --> 00:58:49,602
Why, because you think
you can lick me, right?

1297
00:58:49,693 --> 00:58:51,650
I never said I could lick you,
but I could whoop you for sure.

1298
00:58:51,737 --> 00:58:52,727
Now we're talking!

1299
00:58:52,821 --> 00:58:54,187
Come on. Best out of three falls, come on.

1300
00:58:54,281 --> 00:58:55,863
Hey, cut it out, okay? I'm not
gonna wrestle an old man

1301
00:58:55,949 --> 00:58:57,656
whose ass is hanging out
of his hospital gown.

1302
00:58:57,784 --> 00:58:59,070
Greco-Roman style. Best way. Come on.

1303
00:58:59,161 --> 00:59:01,244
Hey, Great Santini, I'm not
gonna do this, all right?

1304
00:59:01,329 --> 00:59:02,945
- Cut it out. Get some rest.
- All right.

1305
00:59:03,040 --> 00:59:04,702
Hey!

1306
00:59:04,791 --> 00:59:06,748
That's one, candy-ass.

1307
00:59:06,835 --> 00:59:08,451
Now you're gonna get whipped, old man.

1308
00:59:08,545 --> 00:59:09,626
Come on. Bring it on.

1309
00:59:14,843 --> 00:59:17,506
- Tap out!
- Nah. I can keep going all night, kid.

1310
00:59:17,637 --> 00:59:19,674
You hear that heart rate?
You can set your watch to it.

1311
00:59:19,806 --> 00:59:21,547
Yeah. 'Cause ice water
only flows at one speed, huh?

1312
00:59:21,641 --> 00:59:23,507
That's right, pal. Now go to sleep.

1313
00:59:23,643 --> 00:59:25,930
You know I came in to say something nice,
but now you can forget it.

1314
00:59:26,688 --> 00:59:27,769
What nice thing?

1315
00:59:27,856 --> 00:59:29,188
No. Forget it.

1316
00:59:29,274 --> 00:59:31,311
You know, when that gun went off,

1317
00:59:31,401 --> 00:59:32,517
I thought you were a goner.

1318
00:59:32,652 --> 00:59:33,768
There's something that we never say that

1319
00:59:33,862 --> 00:59:35,273
one of us should say before it's too late.

1320
00:59:38,033 --> 00:59:39,365
Yeah? Like... Like what?

1321
00:59:39,534 --> 00:59:42,197
No, I'm not gonna say it now,
but maybe you want to say something.

1322
00:59:42,287 --> 00:59:44,324
- I don't know what you're talking about.
- Yeah?

1323
00:59:44,414 --> 00:59:46,781
Seems like you might want to
get something off your chest.

1324
00:59:46,875 --> 00:59:47,865
No. Nothing comes to mind.

1325
00:59:48,001 --> 00:59:49,162
But if you want to say something,

1326
00:59:49,252 --> 00:59:50,493
I'm not gonna stop you or anything.

1327
00:59:50,587 --> 00:59:51,577
No, I'm good.

1328
00:59:51,671 --> 00:59:52,787
But you might wanna unburden yourself

1329
00:59:52,881 --> 00:59:54,042
before you bust that frickin' machine.

1330
00:59:54,132 --> 00:59:57,591
Yeah. Well, if I was gonna say
something, and I'm not...

1331
00:59:57,677 --> 00:59:58,667
What are you gonna say?

1332
00:59:58,762 --> 01:00:00,298
But if I was, I might want to
tell you that I...

1333
01:00:00,388 --> 01:00:01,378
Hello?

1334
01:00:01,473 --> 01:00:02,680
Wait, it's Brad! Don't... Don't say it!
Don't say it.

1335
01:00:02,766 --> 01:00:03,756
Knock, knock!

1336
01:00:03,850 --> 01:00:04,931
Time out on three, okay? One, two, three.

1337
01:00:05,018 --> 01:00:06,008
Hey, Brad.

1338
01:00:06,770 --> 01:00:07,931
What's going on?

1339
01:00:08,021 --> 01:00:09,683
Hey. Am I interrupting something?

1340
01:00:09,773 --> 01:00:11,264
- What? No, nothing.
- No, we're fine.

1341
01:00:11,358 --> 01:00:12,519
Why are you being so weird, Brad?

1342
01:00:12,609 --> 01:00:13,690
Just seems a little awkward in here.

1343
01:00:15,445 --> 01:00:16,856
Gosh. It smells like a bullfight.

1344
01:00:17,239 --> 01:00:18,696
So, look, guys,

1345
01:00:19,032 --> 01:00:20,864
I'm not here to tell you I told you so,

1346
01:00:20,951 --> 01:00:22,032
even though I did.

1347
01:00:22,953 --> 01:00:24,535
I've just been thinking that

1348
01:00:24,621 --> 01:00:26,738
we've had a lot of tensions
as of late, and I thought

1349
01:00:26,873 --> 01:00:29,286
maybe we could use
a Dads' Night Out. Right?

1350
01:00:29,376 --> 01:00:31,709
Yeah. So what are we thinking, Brad?

1351
01:00:31,795 --> 01:00:32,876
Strip club?

1352
01:00:33,171 --> 01:00:35,163
Even better.

1353
01:00:35,632 --> 01:00:39,091
Look, it's a cute tiny monkey
on your back.

1354
01:00:43,348 --> 01:00:46,136
Give us all the money in the drawers
and all the lollipops.

1355
01:00:50,147 --> 01:00:51,763
Guys, I can't keep up.

1356
01:01:01,408 --> 01:01:02,398
I'm gonna hit the head.

1357
01:01:02,492 --> 01:01:04,074
- I'll get us a couple more drinks.
- Sure.

1358
01:01:04,661 --> 01:01:07,074
Hey, am I crazy or are you guys
having a good time?

1359
01:01:07,164 --> 01:01:08,575
I don't know. I think we kind of are.

1360
01:01:08,665 --> 01:01:11,533
- That's wonderful, Dusty!
- Thanks, Don.

1361
01:01:11,626 --> 01:01:13,458
I told you we'd rub off on you two.

1362
01:01:13,545 --> 01:01:15,411
In this room right now,

1363
01:01:15,505 --> 01:01:18,498
there's a man who,
despite his advancing years,

1364
01:01:18,592 --> 01:01:20,754
is apparently an improv ninja.

1365
01:01:21,511 --> 01:01:22,843
Brad, you didn't.

1366
01:01:22,971 --> 01:01:25,679
I did. I so did!

1367
01:01:25,932 --> 01:01:27,844
Don Whitaker, ladies and gentlemen!

1368
01:01:28,185 --> 01:01:30,347
All right. All right.

1369
01:01:33,106 --> 01:01:34,517
You are the greatest.

1370
01:01:36,943 --> 01:01:38,684
Don! Let's hear it for Don!

1371
01:01:39,529 --> 01:01:40,895
We're gonna play a little "Arms Akimbo."

1372
01:01:40,989 --> 01:01:42,105
Do you know that one?

1373
01:01:42,199 --> 01:01:43,280
- Of course I do!
- Awesome.

1374
01:01:43,366 --> 01:01:44,402
They're gonna love this.

1375
01:01:44,784 --> 01:01:47,367
- Can somebody do my Velcro?
- Yes.

1376
01:01:47,704 --> 01:01:49,536
He's got tiny little girl arms!

1377
01:01:51,166 --> 01:01:54,876
Okay. We're gonna do a scene,
and we need some suggestions.

1378
01:01:54,961 --> 01:01:56,418
Can you suggest an animal?

1379
01:01:56,588 --> 01:01:57,954
- Raccoon!
- A panda!

1380
01:01:58,131 --> 01:01:59,838
Raccoon, good! All right.

1381
01:01:59,966 --> 01:02:01,798
And, sir, what is your profession?

1382
01:02:01,968 --> 01:02:03,254
I'm a dermatologist.

1383
01:02:03,428 --> 01:02:06,262
And finally we need a human relationship.

1384
01:02:06,431 --> 01:02:07,512
Father and son!

1385
01:02:07,599 --> 01:02:09,306
A healthy father and son relationship.

1386
01:02:09,392 --> 01:02:10,883
Or how about a divorce?

1387
01:02:12,395 --> 01:02:14,136
Now you're getting in the spirit, Dusty.

1388
01:02:14,356 --> 01:02:15,437
Yes. Okay. We're taking "divorce."

1389
01:02:15,523 --> 01:02:16,684
That's all we need. Give it up!

1390
01:02:16,858 --> 01:02:18,474
That's really dark.

1391
01:02:19,236 --> 01:02:20,272
Come on, babe.

1392
01:02:20,362 --> 01:02:21,898
Just a little fun before he gets here.

1393
01:02:22,072 --> 01:02:23,279
No. Stop it. I told you, okay?

1394
01:02:23,365 --> 01:02:25,903
No canoodling until
the divorce is finalized.

1395
01:02:25,992 --> 01:02:27,574
- It's not right.
- Come on.

1396
01:02:28,161 --> 01:02:29,197
Knock, knock.

1397
01:02:29,496 --> 01:02:32,330
He has no idea what he's walking into!

1398
01:02:33,416 --> 01:02:34,907
You're home!

1399
01:02:35,085 --> 01:02:36,246
Yes.

1400
01:02:37,337 --> 01:02:38,453
Where were you?

1401
01:02:40,090 --> 01:02:43,083
I took our raccoon to the dermatologist.

1402
01:02:43,260 --> 01:02:44,626
He got two of the suggestions already.

1403
01:02:44,719 --> 01:02:46,085
He's on fire!

1404
01:02:46,179 --> 01:02:48,512
Aren't you even gonna address
the strange man in your home?

1405
01:02:48,682 --> 01:02:51,174
Yeah, bro, don't you even
want to know who I am?

1406
01:02:51,768 --> 01:02:53,259
I know who you are.

1407
01:02:53,436 --> 01:02:55,177
Don, if you'll excuse me,

1408
01:02:55,355 --> 01:02:57,096
I think I'm gonna start
giving it to your wife.

1409
01:02:57,607 --> 01:02:58,597
Shut up!

1410
01:02:58,775 --> 01:03:00,732
Just shut up with that kind of talk!

1411
01:03:01,695 --> 01:03:04,529
When we met on that flight,
I was really nice to you.

1412
01:03:04,698 --> 01:03:08,692
I listened to you tell your stupid story
over and over again,

1413
01:03:08,952 --> 01:03:11,035
and I complimented your hat!

1414
01:03:14,291 --> 01:03:16,829
- Brad, we have to stop this.
- He's killing!

1415
01:03:16,918 --> 01:03:18,034
Don't you see what's happening?

1416
01:03:18,128 --> 01:03:20,120
I do. I see a room of people
laughing at my father.

1417
01:03:20,213 --> 01:03:21,203
- It's amazing.
- Okay.

1418
01:03:21,298 --> 01:03:24,291
- Have some water.
- No, I don't want water.

1419
01:03:28,722 --> 01:03:29,803
I don't want water!

1420
01:03:29,889 --> 01:03:31,755
I want my wife back.

1421
01:03:31,850 --> 01:03:35,639
And I want our Sunday brunches
at the Cracker Barrel.

1422
01:03:35,770 --> 01:03:38,183
Braddie, we've got to get him
off the stage.

1423
01:03:38,273 --> 01:03:40,856
All you needed was
somebody to listen to you,

1424
01:03:41,943 --> 01:03:43,605
and all I do is talk.

1425
01:03:43,862 --> 01:03:45,023
On and on and on.

1426
01:03:45,113 --> 01:03:48,902
When am I ever gonna learn
to shut my big fat mouth?

1427
01:03:50,952 --> 01:03:52,113
Ginny.

1428
01:03:53,872 --> 01:03:54,862
Ginny.

1429
01:03:55,665 --> 01:03:57,327
My sweet Ginny.

1430
01:03:57,417 --> 01:03:59,750
Why is he using my mom's real name?

1431
01:04:02,422 --> 01:04:03,833
Hey, Dad?

1432
01:04:04,591 --> 01:04:06,253
Is this true?

1433
01:04:07,886 --> 01:04:09,627
Are you and Mom divorced?

1434
01:04:11,723 --> 01:04:13,715
I wanted to tell you, Brad.

1435
01:04:17,479 --> 01:04:20,438
Son, you're home from summer camp!

1436
01:04:21,983 --> 01:04:25,101
I don't go to summer camp,
I'm a grown man. Okay?

1437
01:04:29,657 --> 01:04:32,115
Why are you laughing?
I'm not part of this! Okay?

1438
01:04:32,202 --> 01:04:35,286
You are a part of this family,
and you will respect your parents.

1439
01:04:35,372 --> 01:04:36,453
- Yeah.
- Shut up!

1440
01:04:36,539 --> 01:04:37,529
- Brad.
- Just shut up.

1441
01:04:37,665 --> 01:04:38,701
Let me out of this bit!

1442
01:04:39,125 --> 01:04:41,037
What about him? Is he still around?

1443
01:04:41,127 --> 01:04:42,868
Do I have a stepdad?

1444
01:04:44,589 --> 01:04:47,798
Stop doing that to me!
I'm a paying customer!

1445
01:04:48,385 --> 01:04:49,967
Brad, let's go.

1446
01:04:51,304 --> 01:04:52,670
Come on.

1447
01:05:01,940 --> 01:05:04,148
Will you please just go out there
and talk to him?

1448
01:05:04,567 --> 01:05:07,150
He won't talk to me,
and I don't blame him.

1449
01:05:08,321 --> 01:05:10,483
You know, it's not really all your fault.

1450
01:05:11,658 --> 01:05:13,149
You can't blame Dusty.

1451
01:05:13,326 --> 01:05:16,990
He couldn't have known about Ginny and me
when he made that improv suggestion.

1452
01:05:19,332 --> 01:05:21,790
- You did know!
- It was pretty obvious, Don.

1453
01:05:21,960 --> 01:05:23,576
A guy your age either joins
an improv group

1454
01:05:23,670 --> 01:05:24,660
because his wife left him,

1455
01:05:24,754 --> 01:05:26,746
or his wife left him
because he joined an improv group.

1456
01:05:26,840 --> 01:05:29,503
- So you did it on purpose?
- No! Well...

1457
01:05:29,884 --> 01:05:31,625
Well, yeah. All right? I did.

1458
01:05:31,719 --> 01:05:33,802
You and Brad are all lovey-dovey
and smug about your relationship.

1459
01:05:33,888 --> 01:05:35,299
I mean, you make out every chance you get.

1460
01:05:35,390 --> 01:05:36,926
Meanwhile, my dad's ditching out on me.

1461
01:05:37,016 --> 01:05:38,598
Maybe I got a little jealous, all right?

1462
01:05:38,685 --> 01:05:39,846
Look, I didn't think
you were gonna freak out

1463
01:05:39,936 --> 01:05:42,474
and spill your guts
to a room full of drunken skiers!

1464
01:05:42,564 --> 01:05:44,430
- Hey. What is wrong with you?
- What? I didn't...

1465
01:05:44,524 --> 01:05:46,231
Go out there and fix this right now.

1466
01:05:46,359 --> 01:05:47,440
- Go!
- All right.

1467
01:05:52,282 --> 01:05:53,739
Are you serious?

1468
01:05:53,825 --> 01:05:54,941
I'm keeping this.

1469
01:06:17,390 --> 01:06:18,597
Are you okay?

1470
01:06:21,936 --> 01:06:23,928
My parents are divorced.

1471
01:06:24,022 --> 01:06:25,263
Mine, too.

1472
01:06:25,648 --> 01:06:26,638
Sucks.

1473
01:06:27,233 --> 01:06:29,566
- Yeah.
- I think it was my fault.

1474
01:06:30,195 --> 01:06:33,654
- Was yours your fault, too?
- I don't know. I hope not.

1475
01:06:33,781 --> 01:06:35,864
I just found out last night.
When did you find out?

1476
01:06:36,034 --> 01:06:37,821
- I was a baby.
- When you were a baby?

1477
01:06:39,204 --> 01:06:41,662
Maybe it was your fault.
Were you a difficult baby?

1478
01:06:42,081 --> 01:06:43,367
I don't know.

1479
01:06:43,458 --> 01:06:46,622
You know what? Your lack of specifics
leads me to believe it was your fault.

1480
01:06:46,794 --> 01:06:49,332
No, no, no! You were not
a difficult baby, sweetheart.

1481
01:06:49,422 --> 01:06:50,879
Brad, dude, what are you telling the kid?

1482
01:06:51,049 --> 01:06:53,291
Come on, man. I know
you're upset about last night.

1483
01:06:53,468 --> 01:06:54,959
All right? I'm sorry
about what happened, okay?

1484
01:06:55,053 --> 01:06:56,544
I didn't mean to give
that improv suggestion.

1485
01:06:56,638 --> 01:06:58,220
It just... It just kind of slipped out.

1486
01:06:59,766 --> 01:07:01,928
- Know what, Dusty? It's okay.
- Really?

1487
01:07:02,018 --> 01:07:03,634
- Yeah.
- Thanks, Brad.

1488
01:07:03,770 --> 01:07:05,932
Look, why don't you come in
and talk to Don? He's feeling a little...

1489
01:07:06,022 --> 01:07:08,014
Oh, my gosh. I wonder who that could be?

1490
01:07:09,025 --> 01:07:10,436
What a nice truck!

1491
01:07:18,368 --> 01:07:19,358
Daddy!

1492
01:07:19,452 --> 01:07:22,911
- What are you doing here?
- Come on. What am I doing?

1493
01:07:23,498 --> 01:07:25,831
I want to celebrate Christmas
with my perfect little girl.

1494
01:07:25,917 --> 01:07:29,126
Don't you want to spend the holidays
with your one true real dad?

1495
01:07:29,212 --> 01:07:30,578
Yeah, come on!

1496
01:07:30,672 --> 01:07:32,254
- Let's come see the cabin.
- Hey, Roger.

1497
01:07:32,340 --> 01:07:33,706
It's so cool!

1498
01:07:36,094 --> 01:07:37,175
Come on, hurry. You're going too slow.

1499
01:07:37,262 --> 01:07:38,252
I'm coming, sweetheart.

1500
01:07:38,638 --> 01:07:40,880
You invite him all the way up here
just to get back at me?

1501
01:07:41,057 --> 01:07:42,173
Yeah, I did.

1502
01:07:44,185 --> 01:07:46,928
- Bye, Kurt! Call me!
- Yeah, next time I'm in.

1503
01:07:47,647 --> 01:07:49,013
That's her dad, yeah?

1504
01:07:51,484 --> 01:07:52,816
And you invited him, too, didn't you?

1505
01:07:52,902 --> 01:07:54,188
I sure did, yep.

1506
01:07:54,571 --> 01:07:58,565
I don't know what I missed,
but this is getting good, boys.

1507
01:07:59,534 --> 01:08:01,196
- I like your style, Brad.
- Hey, hey, hey.

1508
01:08:04,497 --> 01:08:05,954
You're opening up the harbor, Brad.

1509
01:08:06,040 --> 01:08:08,623
The harbor is wide open,
and it's Fleet Week!

1510
01:08:08,710 --> 01:08:10,872
All right, good. 'Cause I got a few boats
that want to set sail.

1511
01:08:10,962 --> 01:08:11,952
Yeah, good. So do I.

1512
01:08:12,046 --> 01:08:13,582
You favor little Griffy over my kids.

1513
01:08:13,673 --> 01:08:14,959
What? I do not!

1514
01:08:15,049 --> 01:08:16,381
He gets to sleep in your bed all the time.

1515
01:08:16,467 --> 01:08:17,457
Megan and Dylan never get to.

1516
01:08:17,594 --> 01:08:19,176
You want them to sleep in my bed with me?

1517
01:08:19,262 --> 01:08:21,049
God, no! Don't you ever think about it!

1518
01:08:21,139 --> 01:08:22,380
I'm not thinking about it!

1519
01:08:22,473 --> 01:08:23,589
- You brought it up.
- Good! You better not.

1520
01:08:23,683 --> 01:08:24,844
- Shut up!
- Hey, you shut up.

1521
01:08:24,934 --> 01:08:26,391
- You shut up!
- No, you shut up!

1522
01:08:26,477 --> 01:08:29,345
Okay. Well, he's not gonna be part of that
special thing we got planned tonight,

1523
01:08:29,439 --> 01:08:30,725
if that's what you're thinking.

1524
01:08:30,857 --> 01:08:31,847
Yeah? So you're gonna tell Adrianna

1525
01:08:31,941 --> 01:08:33,773
that everyone's invited
to that "special thing"

1526
01:08:33,860 --> 01:08:35,601
we have planned for tonight,
except her dad.

1527
01:09:13,232 --> 01:09:16,566
Hey. Five more minutes
and I get to be Joseph.

1528
01:09:16,653 --> 01:09:19,191
You're not the right type
to play Jesus' dad, Brad.

1529
01:09:19,489 --> 01:09:22,197
He wasn't Jesus' dad,
he was Jesus' stepdad.

1530
01:09:22,492 --> 01:09:24,154
And I'm exactly the right type.

1531
01:09:25,119 --> 01:09:26,280
You'd better stop hitting me

1532
01:09:26,371 --> 01:09:27,782
with that shepherd stick, Brad.
I'm warning you.

1533
01:09:27,914 --> 01:09:29,746
Brad's right. Let him be Joseph.

1534
01:09:29,916 --> 01:09:31,077
Thank you, Roger, I appreciate that.

1535
01:09:31,167 --> 01:09:32,533
It's Brad's turn, Dusty.

1536
01:09:32,752 --> 01:09:34,368
Dad, don't break character.

1537
01:09:34,462 --> 01:09:35,748
And stop trying to butter me up.

1538
01:09:35,922 --> 01:09:38,505
- Can we show some decorum?
- I'm showing decorum.

1539
01:09:38,633 --> 01:09:40,750
You guys, zip it!
You're gonna wake up Baby Jesus.

1540
01:09:44,389 --> 01:09:45,550
That's it. Give me the beard.

1541
01:09:45,640 --> 01:09:47,131
Don't touch my Joseph beard, Brad!

1542
01:09:47,225 --> 01:09:48,557
- Give him the beard!
- Dad, stay out of it!

1543
01:09:48,643 --> 01:09:50,100
Can we have some respect for the Nativity?

1544
01:09:50,186 --> 01:09:51,176
Cut it out!

1545
01:09:51,646 --> 01:09:54,229
This is stupid. I don't even get it.

1546
01:09:54,607 --> 01:09:57,270
Why go on a trip when
Mary's about to have a baby?

1547
01:09:57,443 --> 01:09:58,684
What's so damn important

1548
01:09:58,778 --> 01:10:01,191
you got to go to Bethlehem
in the middle of the night?

1549
01:10:01,280 --> 01:10:03,192
There was a census, okay?
We covered that in Sunday School.

1550
01:10:03,282 --> 01:10:05,239
Megan, what is going...

1551
01:10:06,369 --> 01:10:07,951
Did you get into the eggnog?

1552
01:10:08,037 --> 01:10:09,323
Hey. Who's up for some IHOP?

1553
01:10:09,414 --> 01:10:10,950
Yeah, that kid's pickled all right.

1554
01:10:11,040 --> 01:10:12,997
Mom, you're pretty. Can we go to IHOP?

1555
01:10:13,793 --> 01:10:14,954
I'm sorry, folks.

1556
01:10:15,044 --> 01:10:16,751
Having some technical difficulties.

1557
01:10:16,838 --> 01:10:19,706
Great, Dad. Now you've broken
the fourth wall!

1558
01:10:20,049 --> 01:10:21,506
None of it's real, folks.

1559
01:10:21,884 --> 01:10:23,295
I want to go wait in the car.

1560
01:10:23,386 --> 01:10:25,173
Give me the keys, Brad!

1561
01:10:25,263 --> 01:10:27,425
No, I am not giving you
the keys to the car,

1562
01:10:27,515 --> 01:10:29,677
because you're drunk and you're a child.

1563
01:10:29,809 --> 01:10:34,144
Nobody likes your dumb, stupid Brad voice.

1564
01:10:34,355 --> 01:10:36,017
And you smell like pumpkins!

1565
01:10:36,190 --> 01:10:38,603
- And you're a mean drunk.
- Kid's got an arm.

1566
01:10:38,818 --> 01:10:40,980
Drunk nine-year-old. Real nice parenting.

1567
01:10:41,404 --> 01:10:42,861
You better watch it, Roger.

1568
01:10:45,658 --> 01:10:46,990
Adrianna! Are you okay, sweetheart?

1569
01:10:47,076 --> 01:10:48,157
Is she okay? Is she... What is she...

1570
01:10:50,997 --> 01:10:53,205
What a shock.
Now we know where Megan got the eggnog.

1571
01:10:53,332 --> 01:10:55,164
You always assume she's the bad influence.

1572
01:10:55,251 --> 01:10:57,584
Maybe your daughter plied
my daughter with alcohol.

1573
01:10:57,670 --> 01:11:00,458
Maybe your daughter's that way
because her mother is a shoplifter.

1574
01:11:00,548 --> 01:11:02,164
Shoplifter.

1575
01:11:02,884 --> 01:11:04,876
Sara, we've been working on
the shoplifting thing, okay?

1576
01:11:05,011 --> 01:11:06,377
But that has nothing to do with Adrianna

1577
01:11:06,471 --> 01:11:07,632
being such a little nightmare
all the time.

1578
01:11:07,722 --> 01:11:08,929
My daughter is not a nightmare!

1579
01:11:09,015 --> 01:11:10,005
Come on, Adrianna.

1580
01:11:10,099 --> 01:11:11,385
No, sweetheart, I didn't mean that.

1581
01:11:11,476 --> 01:11:12,592
- Honey!
- Hey.

1582
01:11:13,394 --> 01:11:15,807
- What'd you call my daughter?
- He called her a nightmare.

1583
01:11:16,022 --> 01:11:17,888
Hey. I'm a lot of things,
but I'm not a heathen.

1584
01:11:17,982 --> 01:11:18,972
Let's take this outside.

1585
01:11:19,066 --> 01:11:20,477
Yeah, let's step outside the manger.

1586
01:11:20,568 --> 01:11:21,729
He called her a nightmare.

1587
01:11:21,819 --> 01:11:23,355
Here we go. Now, now, boys,

1588
01:11:23,738 --> 01:11:25,479
we can't just leave!

1589
01:11:25,573 --> 01:11:28,316
Joseph and the Innkeeper
rumble outside the manger!

1590
01:11:28,409 --> 01:11:29,741
Make the first move, Innkeeper.

1591
01:11:29,827 --> 01:11:30,908
Kick his ass, Joseph!

1592
01:11:31,078 --> 01:11:33,161
We are not going to do this
in front of the children!

1593
01:11:33,247 --> 01:11:35,489
Now, what kind of fathers are you, anyway?

1594
01:11:35,583 --> 01:11:36,869
That's rich!

1595
01:11:36,959 --> 01:11:39,872
Coming from a guy
who lies to his son for six months.

1596
01:11:40,046 --> 01:11:42,880
Maybe that's why everyone thinks
your stories are so "delightful,"

1597
01:11:42,965 --> 01:11:44,376
because they're all lies!

1598
01:11:45,051 --> 01:11:46,542
Sara, get the kids out of here, okay?

1599
01:11:46,636 --> 01:11:49,379
Happily. I don't want them
watching this anyway.

1600
01:11:49,597 --> 01:11:51,213
Have fun, morons!

1601
01:11:51,724 --> 01:11:54,558
- Pancakes, bitches!
- Do not say "bitches."

1602
01:11:54,644 --> 01:11:55,680
Kids are gone. Let's go.

1603
01:11:55,770 --> 01:11:57,227
I'm not hitting a guy dressed like Joseph.

1604
01:11:57,939 --> 01:11:59,271
The beard's off, Roger.

1605
01:11:59,398 --> 01:12:00,605
How many excuses
you want to pull out, man?

1606
01:12:00,942 --> 01:12:01,932
Now it's on.

1607
01:12:02,068 --> 01:12:03,434
- You know what, Brad?
- Don!

1608
01:12:03,528 --> 01:12:04,894
Yes, I lied!

1609
01:12:04,987 --> 01:12:07,821
Because whenever there's
anything wrong in your life,

1610
01:12:08,074 --> 01:12:09,986
if it isn't roses and rainbows,

1611
01:12:10,076 --> 01:12:11,612
you completely fall apart.

1612
01:12:11,786 --> 01:12:13,698
I thought we had an honest relationship!

1613
01:12:13,871 --> 01:12:15,282
Oh, yeah? Brad, I bet you never told him

1614
01:12:15,414 --> 01:12:17,246
about that procedure
you had last year, did you?

1615
01:12:17,416 --> 01:12:18,623
Oh, my God. What procedure?

1616
01:12:18,709 --> 01:12:21,076
It was nothing, just some benign tissue.

1617
01:12:21,254 --> 01:12:23,997
How about that?
You're both a couple of lying sacks.

1618
01:12:24,131 --> 01:12:25,121
And, you!

1619
01:12:25,258 --> 01:12:26,374
From the minute you got here,

1620
01:12:26,467 --> 01:12:28,880
you've been nothing but
mean and sarcastic.

1621
01:12:28,970 --> 01:12:30,256
Well, you know what, Kurt?

1622
01:12:30,429 --> 01:12:31,886
- F you!
- Dad!

1623
01:12:32,098 --> 01:12:33,714
That's right. Forget you!

1624
01:12:33,808 --> 01:12:36,141
Attaboy, swami. Throwing down F words.

1625
01:12:36,269 --> 01:12:38,101
Not the F word, but an F word,
and that's a good start.

1626
01:12:38,187 --> 01:12:40,019
Now, come on, give me the finger, big boy.
Come on.

1627
01:12:40,106 --> 01:12:41,642
- Come on.
- Hey! Hey!

1628
01:12:41,732 --> 01:12:43,564
Are we gonna still fight or what?

1629
01:12:43,651 --> 01:12:45,893
Roger brings up a good point.
Let's get the momentum back.

1630
01:12:45,987 --> 01:12:48,354
Come on, Roger. Get some!
Let's get in there!

1631
01:12:48,447 --> 01:12:50,814
- Come on!
- No, no, no, no, no!

1632
01:12:50,992 --> 01:12:54,736
If you lay one hand on each other,
whether the kids are here or not,

1633
01:12:54,829 --> 01:12:56,991
it will negatively impact them.

1634
01:12:57,582 --> 01:12:59,915
All right.
I'm not gonna lay a hand on him.

1635
01:13:01,919 --> 01:13:03,251
What are you doing?

1636
01:13:03,337 --> 01:13:05,920
I see. Yeah, yeah. Snowball fight.

1637
01:13:06,132 --> 01:13:08,840
I've got some Nerf guns
in the back of my car.

1638
01:13:08,926 --> 01:13:09,916
Want me to get them?

1639
01:13:10,011 --> 01:13:12,344
I pitched triple-A for the Red Sox
in their farm system, Roger.

1640
01:13:12,430 --> 01:13:13,420
Don't say I didn't warn you.

1641
01:13:13,514 --> 01:13:14,504
Take your best shot.

1642
01:13:19,687 --> 01:13:20,768
Dad!

1643
01:13:21,147 --> 01:13:22,513
Don, I'm sorry!

1644
01:13:23,900 --> 01:13:25,232
That sucks.

1645
01:13:25,610 --> 01:13:27,476
- I'm so sorry.
- No, no, it was all right.

1646
01:13:30,531 --> 01:13:32,022
Hey, no fair. That's an ice ball.

1647
01:13:32,158 --> 01:13:33,194
You bet it is.

1648
01:13:33,326 --> 01:13:35,283
You know, you throw that
and we are no longer co-dads.

1649
01:13:35,369 --> 01:13:36,610
I'm way ahead of you, dickhead.

1650
01:13:36,704 --> 01:13:37,694
You know, from now on,

1651
01:13:37,788 --> 01:13:39,154
we'll just act like
a normal blended family

1652
01:13:39,248 --> 01:13:40,284
with me hating your guts.

1653
01:13:40,374 --> 01:13:41,410
The kids will never know,

1654
01:13:41,500 --> 01:13:44,368
because I'm too good of a dad to
ever throw their stepfather under the bus.

1655
01:13:44,503 --> 01:13:46,165
But that's right where
you're gonna be, Brad.

1656
01:13:46,255 --> 01:13:47,996
Under my bus.

1657
01:13:48,090 --> 01:13:51,003
Well, guess what, I'm gonna celebrate you
morning, noon and night

1658
01:13:51,093 --> 01:13:53,426
because it's the right thing to do
in front of the kids.

1659
01:13:53,512 --> 01:13:55,424
But just know the way
I really feel about you

1660
01:13:55,514 --> 01:13:57,506
is you can suck a fart, Dusty.

1661
01:13:57,767 --> 01:14:00,384
A wet, greasy fart.

1662
01:14:03,022 --> 01:14:05,856
You gonna keep pump-faking that thing
or you gonna take a shot, Brad?

1663
01:14:07,360 --> 01:14:09,192
What? What?

1664
01:14:10,696 --> 01:14:12,187
He's never played sports ever.

1665
01:14:12,281 --> 01:14:13,772
Maybe it's stuck to his hand.

1666
01:14:25,378 --> 01:14:26,744
That's what I thought.

1667
01:14:26,837 --> 01:14:28,248
You know what, Dusty, you're not worth it.

1668
01:14:28,381 --> 01:14:29,462
Come on, Dad.

1669
01:14:29,840 --> 01:14:30,876
Good.

1670
01:14:30,967 --> 01:14:32,208
Psych. You're totally worth it!

1671
01:14:33,970 --> 01:14:34,960
Dad!

1672
01:14:36,555 --> 01:14:39,298
- That was an ice ball.
- Treating your dad like that!

1673
01:14:39,392 --> 01:14:40,382
Dad.

1674
01:14:40,810 --> 01:14:42,426
Look, it was an accident.

1675
01:14:45,731 --> 01:14:46,767
Go ahead, Roger.

1676
01:14:47,441 --> 01:14:48,932
Brad was right the first time.

1677
01:14:50,027 --> 01:14:51,393
You're not worth it.

1678
01:14:53,447 --> 01:14:55,484
Dang! Right down my neck!

1679
01:14:55,574 --> 01:14:56,860
Don! Sorry! Sorry!

1680
01:14:58,077 --> 01:15:00,069
That guy's like a snowball magnet.

1681
01:15:00,746 --> 01:15:02,738
You were right about everything.
You happy now?

1682
01:15:03,582 --> 01:15:04,823
Dusty,

1683
01:15:05,459 --> 01:15:07,291
I do like being right.

1684
01:15:11,841 --> 01:15:13,127
Hey, is that your baby in there?

1685
01:15:13,217 --> 01:15:14,207
Griffy!

1686
01:15:15,428 --> 01:15:18,341
I know. I know, sweetie.
It's okay, it's okay.

1687
01:15:18,431 --> 01:15:20,093
I know, I know.

1688
01:15:20,182 --> 01:15:23,016
This was Dusty's idea.
I never wanted to do this.

1689
01:16:00,806 --> 01:16:02,798
Hey, Brad. That one's mine.

1690
01:16:03,976 --> 01:16:05,808
- Is this bag yours?
- Yeah.

1691
01:16:12,068 --> 01:16:13,650
Sara? Sara!

1692
01:16:35,591 --> 01:16:37,048
Oh, my gosh.

1693
01:16:37,134 --> 01:16:38,921
What is going on here?

1694
01:16:43,516 --> 01:16:44,597
What's happening, Officer?

1695
01:16:44,683 --> 01:16:46,925
Avalanche hit the highway up ahead.

1696
01:16:47,019 --> 01:16:48,681
It's gonna take a few hours to clear it,

1697
01:16:48,771 --> 01:16:51,263
so follow the traffic back
into town, all right?

1698
01:16:51,357 --> 01:16:53,815
What caused the avalanche?
Was it all the snow?

1699
01:16:53,901 --> 01:16:54,982
Yeah, I'm pretty sure

1700
01:16:55,069 --> 01:16:57,311
snow had something to do
with the avalanche.

1701
01:16:57,404 --> 01:16:59,020
Keep it moving!

1702
01:17:03,452 --> 01:17:06,695
Well, I guess we could stop
and have lunch to kill time.

1703
01:17:06,789 --> 01:17:08,280
On Christmas Day?

1704
01:17:08,874 --> 01:17:10,240
What's gonna be open?

1705
01:17:10,626 --> 01:17:11,707
I don't know.

1706
01:17:18,467 --> 01:17:19,503
Look at that!

1707
01:17:20,386 --> 01:17:22,093
Looks like everyone had the same idea.

1708
01:17:35,276 --> 01:17:37,438
Oh, no. Everything's sold out.

1709
01:17:37,736 --> 01:17:38,943
Well, I guess we could see Missile Tow.

1710
01:17:39,071 --> 01:17:40,061
What's that about?

1711
01:17:40,156 --> 01:17:41,317
It's Liam Neeson.

1712
01:17:41,407 --> 01:17:44,070
He's a tow truck driver
who's on his way home for Christmas

1713
01:17:44,160 --> 01:17:46,743
with his kids and
happens along some terrorists

1714
01:17:46,829 --> 01:17:48,536
who've hijacked a mobile ICBM.

1715
01:17:48,622 --> 01:17:49,658
So he hooks it to his rig

1716
01:17:49,748 --> 01:17:51,740
and has to get it to NORAD
before Christmas morning.

1717
01:17:51,834 --> 01:17:53,291
I hear it's really good!

1718
01:17:53,377 --> 01:17:55,915
I don't know, Brad, it's PG-13.

1719
01:17:56,005 --> 01:17:58,918
I don't really care
for the salty language.

1720
01:17:59,008 --> 01:18:00,169
Well, it has cute little kids in it.

1721
01:18:00,259 --> 01:18:01,249
I mean, how dirty can it be?

1722
01:18:01,343 --> 01:18:02,629
Besides, you love Liam Neeson.

1723
01:18:02,720 --> 01:18:03,710
I do.

1724
01:18:03,804 --> 01:18:05,386
- Let's just give it a shot.
- Yes!

1725
01:18:05,472 --> 01:18:06,679
Looks very heroic.

1726
01:18:06,765 --> 01:18:09,223
- I'll say that much.
- I mean, really. Man!

1727
01:18:11,353 --> 01:18:13,720
The front row? I don't know, Brad.

1728
01:18:13,814 --> 01:18:15,225
- What about the...
- Dad, please stop!

1729
01:18:15,316 --> 01:18:16,432
It's gonna strain your eyes.

1730
01:18:16,525 --> 01:18:17,936
We don't have a choice, all right?

1731
01:18:19,778 --> 01:18:21,394
Look, it's Mom and Brad!

1732
01:18:24,033 --> 01:18:25,820
Santa's got a present for you bastards.

1733
01:18:35,419 --> 01:18:37,251
You're impounded, asshole.

1734
01:18:38,130 --> 01:18:40,167
You did it, Daddy! You killed them all.

1735
01:18:40,466 --> 01:18:43,254
No, kids. We did it. We killed them all.

1736
01:18:43,677 --> 01:18:44,838
Together.

1737
01:18:44,970 --> 01:18:46,427
We love you, Daddy.

1738
01:18:46,805 --> 01:18:48,387
I love you, too.

1739
01:18:48,974 --> 01:18:51,637
The only thing that matters
to me in this crazy world

1740
01:18:52,186 --> 01:18:53,518
is you kids.

1741
01:18:54,396 --> 01:18:56,479
And I'm sorry that your holiday was ruined

1742
01:18:56,565 --> 01:18:58,557
by those godless mother...

1743
01:19:05,324 --> 01:19:06,405
Sorry, folks.

1744
01:19:06,492 --> 01:19:08,154
Looks like we're having
a bit of a power outage.

1745
01:19:08,285 --> 01:19:10,493
We don't know when
the power's gonna come back on,

1746
01:19:10,579 --> 01:19:13,162
so you guys are all welcome
to stay in here or in the lobby.

1747
01:19:13,249 --> 01:19:15,741
The DOT wants everybody
to stay inside and off the roads,

1748
01:19:15,834 --> 01:19:17,325
so we might be in here for a while.

1749
01:19:19,922 --> 01:19:22,005
You know, I bet this is
because of the snow, too.

1750
01:19:22,258 --> 01:19:23,419
Gee, Dad, you think so?

1751
01:19:50,286 --> 01:19:51,743
I need to use the gent's.

1752
01:19:51,829 --> 01:19:53,320
Brad, do you need to go tee-tee?

1753
01:19:53,414 --> 01:19:54,905
Dad, don't say that in public!

1754
01:19:55,040 --> 01:19:56,076
- Just go.
- All right.

1755
01:19:58,544 --> 01:19:59,580
Is he still looking at me?

1756
01:20:01,463 --> 01:20:02,453
Yes.

1757
01:20:02,548 --> 01:20:04,790
Is he doing that one look that he does?
You know, like...

1758
01:20:06,969 --> 01:20:08,801
- Is he doing that look?
- Yeah.

1759
01:20:09,096 --> 01:20:11,213
Where he doesn't blink? Yeah.

1760
01:20:12,641 --> 01:20:13,631
Yep.

1761
01:20:14,393 --> 01:20:15,634
You know,

1762
01:20:15,936 --> 01:20:16,926
when I said that

1763
01:20:17,062 --> 01:20:18,678
Brad was turning you into
something that you're not?

1764
01:20:19,773 --> 01:20:22,607
Maybe, you know,
what I really meant to say

1765
01:20:22,693 --> 01:20:24,059
was that

1766
01:20:24,695 --> 01:20:27,108
Brad's turning you
into something that I'm not,

1767
01:20:27,573 --> 01:20:28,734
a good dad.

1768
01:20:30,451 --> 01:20:32,238
No? No, that didn't do it for you?

1769
01:20:32,328 --> 01:20:33,409
Come on. I thought it was pretty good.

1770
01:20:33,495 --> 01:20:35,361
That whole speech
was in the movie we just saw.

1771
01:20:35,456 --> 01:20:36,663
- Was it?
- Yeah. Word for word.

1772
01:20:36,749 --> 01:20:38,035
Dramatic pauses and all.

1773
01:20:38,125 --> 01:20:39,241
Liam Neeson just said that.

1774
01:20:39,335 --> 01:20:41,543
It must've been in my subconscious.

1775
01:20:41,920 --> 01:20:43,036
I'm gonna go drain the lizard.

1776
01:20:43,130 --> 01:20:44,120
Yeah. Yeah.

1777
01:20:49,887 --> 01:20:51,799
That is a very impressive

1778
01:20:51,889 --> 01:20:54,302
watch. Is that a Rolex? Mine's a Casio.

1779
01:21:04,276 --> 01:21:06,188
You know what, Kurt?

1780
01:21:06,278 --> 01:21:07,268
When we first met,

1781
01:21:07,363 --> 01:21:10,106
I was so excited about
our being co-grandpas.

1782
01:21:10,282 --> 01:21:13,446
And now everybody's miserable!
And my son won't forgive me.

1783
01:21:14,703 --> 01:21:16,285
You know what you and Brad really need?

1784
01:21:17,289 --> 01:21:18,370
No.

1785
01:21:18,874 --> 01:21:21,537
I'm not taking any advice
from the likes of you.

1786
01:21:21,627 --> 01:21:22,708
No, thank you.

1787
01:21:26,340 --> 01:21:27,797
Okay, what do we need?

1788
01:21:31,136 --> 01:21:33,128
- Hey! Adrianna's here!
- Megan!

1789
01:21:33,222 --> 01:21:34,212
Hi!

1790
01:21:34,306 --> 01:21:37,140
- I can't shake this guy.
- I can't shake this guy.

1791
01:21:37,226 --> 01:21:38,762
- You guys got stuck here, too?
- Yeah.

1792
01:21:38,852 --> 01:21:41,686
And, Dylan, look who else
got stuck. Your girlfriend!

1793
01:21:42,481 --> 01:21:43,688
We should put her under the mistletoe.

1794
01:21:43,774 --> 01:21:44,764
Yeah!

1795
01:21:44,858 --> 01:21:46,815
- Come on, stay under.
- Stay.

1796
01:21:49,947 --> 01:21:51,939
You like that girl, don't you?

1797
01:21:54,243 --> 01:21:55,279
Well,

1798
01:21:55,369 --> 01:21:57,782
who knocked down a pin all by himself?

1799
01:21:58,664 --> 01:22:00,656
- I did?
- Damn right, you did.

1800
01:22:00,791 --> 01:22:02,783
Now go in there and pick up that spare.

1801
01:22:02,876 --> 01:22:04,663
Here she is, Dylan!

1802
01:22:05,754 --> 01:22:07,586
It just doesn't seem right.

1803
01:22:09,341 --> 01:22:10,331
Brad?

1804
01:22:10,426 --> 01:22:12,668
Dad, I really don't want to...

1805
01:22:13,554 --> 01:22:14,544
Jeez.

1806
01:22:14,680 --> 01:22:17,673
We're gonna settle this physically,
like men!

1807
01:22:17,766 --> 01:22:20,008
And when it's all over,
we're gonna feel a whole lot better.

1808
01:22:20,102 --> 01:22:22,185
At least somebody's
taking my advice today.

1809
01:22:22,271 --> 01:22:23,807
Cut it out! This is child abuse!
Honey, help me!

1810
01:22:23,897 --> 01:22:25,559
Don't be such a snowflake. Fight back!

1811
01:22:25,649 --> 01:22:26,639
Hey, guys, come on, knock it off.

1812
01:22:26,775 --> 01:22:27,811
You're making a scene, all right?

1813
01:22:27,985 --> 01:22:29,271
Yeah, Don, lean on him!

1814
01:22:29,361 --> 01:22:31,728
Engage me, son,
for the sake of our male bond.

1815
01:22:34,032 --> 01:22:35,523
No, wait, wait, look. Look!

1816
01:22:40,372 --> 01:22:41,863
What's he doing?

1817
01:22:47,921 --> 01:22:49,787
Oh, my God. He's going in
for his first kiss.

1818
01:22:49,882 --> 01:22:51,544
Look, she's standing under the mistletoe.

1819
01:22:51,633 --> 01:22:53,124
Oh, my God. Where's my phone?
Where's my phone?

1820
01:22:53,218 --> 01:22:54,709
Oh, my God, where's your phone?

1821
01:22:54,803 --> 01:22:55,964
Brad, where's your phone!

1822
01:22:56,054 --> 01:22:58,091
Okay, it's right here.
Right here. Yeah. Yeah.

1823
01:22:59,391 --> 01:23:01,633
Look how brave he is.
She's all yours, buddy.

1824
01:23:02,811 --> 01:23:03,801
Unless she's got a boyfriend.

1825
01:23:03,896 --> 01:23:04,932
In that case,
there's always the Friend Zone.

1826
01:23:05,022 --> 01:23:06,229
No, there's nothing wrong
with the Friend Zone.

1827
01:23:06,315 --> 01:23:07,556
Guys, he's not going
in the Friend Zone, okay?

1828
01:23:07,649 --> 01:23:08,765
Look at that smile. She likes him.

1829
01:23:08,859 --> 01:23:10,475
Yeah, she wants a kiss.

1830
01:23:37,596 --> 01:23:39,053
My God, he kissed his sister!

1831
01:23:39,139 --> 01:23:40,755
Congratulations, you lucky gal.

1832
01:23:42,351 --> 01:23:44,809
I did it, El Padre!
I kissed the girl I like!

1833
01:23:44,895 --> 01:23:46,602
Yeah! Attaboy!

1834
01:23:47,981 --> 01:23:51,145
Did you just kiss your sister?
You sick kid!

1835
01:23:51,235 --> 01:23:52,476
Stepsister.

1836
01:23:52,611 --> 01:23:54,193
I mean, still not okay, I know that.

1837
01:23:54,279 --> 01:23:56,236
What? No, no, wait, he's just
a little confused, all right?

1838
01:23:56,323 --> 01:23:57,859
It's no surprise
when you look at who raised him.

1839
01:23:57,950 --> 01:23:59,816
Adrianna, come on. We're going home.

1840
01:23:59,910 --> 01:24:01,776
Wait, wait, Roger,
you can't go out in that storm.

1841
01:24:01,870 --> 01:24:04,533
I was an alternate for Season 3
Ice Road Truckers.

1842
01:24:04,706 --> 01:24:05,696
I'll be fine.

1843
01:24:07,292 --> 01:24:08,624
That was their best season.

1844
01:24:09,336 --> 01:24:10,543
I got this.

1845
01:24:11,046 --> 01:24:12,582
Wait a minute. Roger, hold up, man.

1846
01:24:12,673 --> 01:24:15,256
No. From now on, I don't want you
anywhere near my daughter.

1847
01:24:15,342 --> 01:24:17,174
I don't want anything to do
with any of you people!

1848
01:24:17,261 --> 01:24:19,344
Look, I never wanted to be
family with you, either, Roger.

1849
01:24:19,471 --> 01:24:21,804
Just like Brad never wanted to
be family with me, did you, Brad?

1850
01:24:21,890 --> 01:24:23,722
No. Not at all. I hated your guts.

1851
01:24:23,809 --> 01:24:25,675
In fact, I still kind of do right now.

1852
01:24:25,811 --> 01:24:27,097
Yeah. Me, too, Brad.

1853
01:24:27,187 --> 01:24:28,769
But we're all connected by these kids.

1854
01:24:28,855 --> 01:24:29,845
No one's going anywhere.

1855
01:24:30,399 --> 01:24:32,231
- You gonna stop me?
- If I have to, yes.

1856
01:24:32,317 --> 01:24:34,400
Yeah, right. You couldn't stop a clock,
you weak tit.

1857
01:24:35,654 --> 01:24:36,895
The hammer.

1858
01:24:40,242 --> 01:24:41,483
You know what, Adrianna?

1859
01:24:41,952 --> 01:24:44,990
You're not gonna like this, young lady,
but this is long overdue.

1860
01:24:48,458 --> 01:24:49,448
I love you.

1861
01:24:51,336 --> 01:24:53,168
- That got me.
- Got me, too. Right here.

1862
01:24:53,255 --> 01:24:54,462
What the hell did you just say?

1863
01:24:54,548 --> 01:24:56,084
You heard me.
I said, I love my stepdaughter!

1864
01:24:56,174 --> 01:24:58,461
And I meant it.
I should've said it a long time ago,

1865
01:24:58,552 --> 01:25:02,045
but I was afraid to put myself out there
and risk getting rejected.

1866
01:25:02,556 --> 01:25:03,546
Sweet.

1867
01:25:03,682 --> 01:25:04,843
You know what?

1868
01:25:05,684 --> 01:25:08,051
Adrianna, you're gonna spend Christmas
with your mom, okay?

1869
01:25:10,272 --> 01:25:11,888
You're not leaving us, Roger.

1870
01:25:12,482 --> 01:25:13,893
'Cause I love you, too.

1871
01:25:16,320 --> 01:25:18,312
- You take that back!
- Nope. I can't.

1872
01:25:18,447 --> 01:25:19,528
Can't take it back now.

1873
01:25:19,615 --> 01:25:21,481
Everybody heard it. It's out there.

1874
01:25:21,575 --> 01:25:23,441
- Everybody hear it?
- Yeah.

1875
01:25:24,411 --> 01:25:26,027
You're her dad, you made her who she is,

1876
01:25:26,121 --> 01:25:29,114
and despite her currently harboring
a fair amount of resentment towards me,

1877
01:25:29,207 --> 01:25:31,164
I love her, so that means I love you, too.

1878
01:25:31,501 --> 01:25:33,367
And I've never been too good
about saying it,

1879
01:25:33,462 --> 01:25:34,998
but I'm gonna follow Brad's example,

1880
01:25:35,088 --> 01:25:36,078
who I also love.

1881
01:25:36,173 --> 01:25:38,381
Now you're just saying things
to choke me up.

1882
01:25:38,467 --> 01:25:39,753
Brad! Cut it out.

1883
01:25:39,885 --> 01:25:41,922
- I'm trying.
- I'm a hot mess here.

1884
01:25:42,054 --> 01:25:43,636
- Don, please!
- You've got to understand,

1885
01:25:43,722 --> 01:25:45,429
when it comes out of nowhere like that,

1886
01:25:45,515 --> 01:25:46,505
what do you expect?

1887
01:25:46,642 --> 01:25:47,883
- Stop!
- I'm stopping.

1888
01:25:47,976 --> 01:25:49,012
- I'm currently stopping.
- We're...

1889
01:25:49,102 --> 01:25:51,435
Yeah, guys. Cut it out,
you're embarrassing me.

1890
01:25:51,521 --> 01:25:52,602
I love you, Brad.

1891
01:25:52,981 --> 01:25:54,722
And I love Karen, I love Sara,

1892
01:25:55,734 --> 01:25:56,724
and I love my kids.

1893
01:26:00,197 --> 01:26:01,483
I...

1894
01:26:05,118 --> 01:26:06,700
I might need a little more time
with that one.

1895
01:26:06,787 --> 01:26:07,777
Sure, understood.

1896
01:26:07,913 --> 01:26:09,779
But we're making progress.
Maybe for your birthday.

1897
01:26:09,915 --> 01:26:10,996
Yeah.

1898
01:26:11,083 --> 01:26:12,073
You know. Unless you want to say anything?

1899
01:26:12,918 --> 01:26:14,625
- Anything at all?
- Say it, Kurt.

1900
01:26:14,753 --> 01:26:16,619
- Now's the time.
- Just say it, Kurt.

1901
01:26:16,755 --> 01:26:17,791
You want to say anything?

1902
01:26:17,923 --> 01:26:19,539
It's not that bad. Just say it.

1903
01:26:19,633 --> 01:26:21,169
- You can do it.
- Do it.

1904
01:26:22,219 --> 01:26:24,757
Nah, the birthday's a good target.
Good target.

1905
01:26:25,097 --> 01:26:27,009
All right, Roger, what do you say?

1906
01:26:27,224 --> 01:26:29,762
It's not too late to spend Christmas
with your family.

1907
01:27:03,635 --> 01:27:05,422
Damn, that's my favorite song of all time.

1908
01:27:29,035 --> 01:27:30,822
I'll play this in August,
I don't even care.

1909
01:28:11,203 --> 01:28:12,944
Yes! Fantastic!

1910
01:28:18,043 --> 01:28:19,454
He heard it!

1911
01:28:29,054 --> 01:28:30,044
Come on, Roger.

1912
01:28:32,140 --> 01:28:34,052
Look. Yes, we're all stuck here,

1913
01:28:34,309 --> 01:28:36,175
but we're with our loved ones.

1914
01:28:36,269 --> 01:28:38,226
I'm not. I came alone.

1915
01:28:38,396 --> 01:28:39,853
Okay, well,

1916
01:28:39,940 --> 01:28:42,478
he came to the movies alone on Christmas,
and that's a little sad.

1917
01:28:42,567 --> 01:28:44,524
That's a little sad!

1918
01:28:45,570 --> 01:28:47,061
But you're not alone, sir.

1919
01:28:47,239 --> 01:28:49,822
I mean, think about it.
We come to the movies all the time.

1920
01:28:50,408 --> 01:28:52,320
We sit with hundreds of people.

1921
01:28:52,577 --> 01:28:55,820
And we laugh together, we cry together,

1922
01:28:56,248 --> 01:28:58,410
but we never look at each other, do we?

1923
01:28:58,667 --> 01:29:01,410
Brad, it's not a microphone,
it's a mallet. See?

1924
01:29:01,628 --> 01:29:03,585
- They can hear you.
- You can still hear me, right?

1925
01:29:03,672 --> 01:29:04,913
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

1926
01:29:05,090 --> 01:29:06,581
Take a look at each other.

1927
01:29:07,008 --> 01:29:08,294
- That's right.
- Hi.

1928
01:29:08,844 --> 01:29:11,507
Give a hug. Give an embrace.

1929
01:29:11,847 --> 01:29:15,340
What we have here are the makings
of a really great Christmas party.

1930
01:29:15,559 --> 01:29:17,141
We have a Christmas tree.

1931
01:29:17,269 --> 01:29:19,261
We have music and snacks.

1932
01:29:19,437 --> 01:29:21,178
We have Christmas spirit.

1933
01:29:21,273 --> 01:29:22,480
We have mirth.

1934
01:29:22,566 --> 01:29:23,647
We have snow!

1935
01:29:23,984 --> 01:29:25,270
You know who doesn't have snow?

1936
01:29:26,111 --> 01:29:28,273
I'll bet he knows who doesn't
have snow, don't you?

1937
01:29:30,907 --> 01:29:33,115
Yeah. Yeah, I know.

1938
01:29:34,119 --> 01:29:35,701
I know where there isn't snow.

1939
01:29:53,179 --> 01:29:54,636
Merry Christmas!

1940
01:29:54,764 --> 01:29:56,175
Merry Christmas, folks!

1941
01:30:08,153 --> 01:30:09,189
What?

1942
01:30:12,866 --> 01:30:14,357
"Sara.

1943
01:30:14,993 --> 01:30:16,655
"Beautiful and smart.

1944
01:30:16,995 --> 01:30:19,328
"The mom that everyone loves"?

1945
01:30:19,956 --> 01:30:22,664
Oh, my God.
She's basing a character on me!

1946
01:30:59,704 --> 01:31:00,694
All right, guys.

1947
01:31:00,830 --> 01:31:02,071
We're not gonna see them again
till Easter,

1948
01:31:02,165 --> 01:31:03,872
so everybody say good-bye
to El Padre and Pop-Pop.

1949
01:31:03,959 --> 01:31:05,416
- Bye, Dylan.
- Good-bye, El Padre!

1950
01:31:05,543 --> 01:31:07,205
Hey, next time you want to shoot a guy,

1951
01:31:07,295 --> 01:31:09,708
don't just wing him,
go for center mass, okay?

1952
01:31:10,048 --> 01:31:11,084
Good-bye, Adrianna.

1953
01:31:13,426 --> 01:31:15,383
I don't want you to go, Pop-Pop!

1954
01:31:15,470 --> 01:31:16,677
- Really?
- Yeah, really?

1955
01:31:16,763 --> 01:31:18,129
Sure. Of course, he gets a hug.

1956
01:31:18,223 --> 01:31:21,011
Maybe you can call me
and tell me more Pop-Pop stories.

1957
01:31:21,101 --> 01:31:22,683
I would love to!

1958
01:31:22,769 --> 01:31:25,182
And I also signed you up
akumenang.com

1959
01:31:25,271 --> 01:31:27,388
It's a dating website
for old people like you.

1960
01:31:27,565 --> 01:31:29,022
Thank you, sweetie.

1961
01:31:29,901 --> 01:31:31,688
Honey, it's your mom texting.

1962
01:31:31,778 --> 01:31:33,394
They're just getting off the plane.

1963
01:31:33,488 --> 01:31:34,945
I'd better go before they get here.

1964
01:31:35,031 --> 01:31:36,818
I don't want to make anything awkward.

1965
01:31:37,075 --> 01:31:38,907
- Bye, Dad.
- Bye, big man.

1966
01:31:39,244 --> 01:31:41,736
- Love you.
- I love you, too, Brad.

1967
01:31:43,039 --> 01:31:45,031
Hey, well, yeah, you have a good flight.

1968
01:31:58,596 --> 01:32:00,337
Yeah, let's not get that going.

1969
01:32:00,515 --> 01:32:01,722
I agree. You've got to start that younger.

1970
01:32:01,808 --> 01:32:02,889
We missed that window.

1971
01:32:03,059 --> 01:32:04,049
I really appreciate the gesture.

1972
01:32:04,144 --> 01:32:05,430
You do? Then okay.

1973
01:32:05,603 --> 01:32:07,435
- Hey. I'll see you, kid.
- See you soon, yeah.

1974
01:32:07,605 --> 01:32:08,641
Yeah, bye, kid.

1975
01:32:09,065 --> 01:32:11,432
- Are you coming, Pop-Pop?
- Come on, Captain!

1976
01:32:12,068 --> 01:32:13,058
Bye, Dad.

1977
01:32:14,029 --> 01:32:15,941
You know, Don, I've been thinking.

1978
01:32:16,031 --> 01:32:17,363
You don't need a dating app.

1979
01:32:17,532 --> 01:32:19,694
What you need is a wingman.

1980
01:32:19,909 --> 01:32:21,366
I switched our flights to Vegas.

1981
01:32:21,453 --> 01:32:23,445
New Year's at Caesar's, fix you right up.

1982
01:32:23,621 --> 01:32:25,328
That sounds wonderful!

1983
01:32:25,790 --> 01:32:27,656
Where are we connecting through?

1984
01:32:27,792 --> 01:32:29,078
Don't start with me, Pop-Pop.

1985
01:32:29,836 --> 01:32:31,828
Hey, Braddie. Don't be nervous now.

1986
01:32:32,088 --> 01:32:35,672
You are the kindest,
most gentle and honest guy I know.

1987
01:32:36,009 --> 01:32:38,501
And whoever your mother
brings down that escalator,

1988
01:32:38,636 --> 01:32:40,002
he's gonna love you, you hear me?

1989
01:32:40,096 --> 01:32:41,257
Grandma!

1990
01:32:45,477 --> 01:32:46,934
Is that Sully?

1991
01:32:47,645 --> 01:32:48,806
Wait, wait, who?

1992
01:32:49,064 --> 01:32:50,475
Sully Sullenberger.

1993
01:32:50,565 --> 01:32:53,308
The guy who saved 155 passengers
on the miracle on the Hudson!

1994
01:32:53,401 --> 01:32:55,063
Clint Eastwood made
a frickin' movie about it.

1995
01:32:55,153 --> 01:32:56,815
Wait. We watched it at your house,
it was awesome!

1996
01:32:56,988 --> 01:32:58,229
Right. Tom Hanks and Aaron Eckhart.

1997
01:32:58,323 --> 01:32:59,404
I really enjoyed it.

1998
01:32:59,491 --> 01:33:02,404
That guy is a national hero,
and he's gonna be your stepdad.

1999
01:33:02,869 --> 01:33:03,859
Amazing.

2000
01:33:04,037 --> 01:33:05,949
I bet you he gets free flight vouchers.

2001
01:33:06,039 --> 01:33:07,701
And maybe get us some vouchers!

2002
01:33:07,791 --> 01:33:08,781
Maybe.

2003
01:33:08,875 --> 01:33:11,583
Well, don't make him wait.
Go say hi. Go! Go!

2004
01:33:11,669 --> 01:33:12,659
Grandma!

2005
01:33:14,255 --> 01:33:16,338
You must be Brad.

2006
01:33:16,424 --> 01:33:17,414
Nope.

2007
01:33:17,509 --> 01:33:19,341
- No, Brad.
- You're not my dad!

2008
01:33:19,427 --> 01:33:20,543
Brad, no, that's a mistake!

2009
01:33:20,720 --> 01:33:22,552
I don't care how many lives you saved!

2010
01:33:22,680 --> 01:33:25,013
You'll never replace him, do you hear me?

2011
01:33:27,393 --> 01:33:29,225
Brad, he's so nice! Come back!

2012
01:33:29,395 --> 01:33:33,139
You only have one good story,
my father has a million!

2013
01:35:12,790 --> 01:35:14,531
You're listening to
Jason Sinclair at the Panda,

2014
01:35:14,626 --> 01:35:16,959
and I've got a little holiday recipe
for you tonight.

2015
01:35:17,128 --> 01:35:20,121
Two cups of eggnog,
one serving of silk pajamas,

2016
01:35:20,215 --> 01:35:22,753
and a heaping helping of a loved one.

2017
01:35:22,842 --> 01:35:25,300
And I'm gonna add a pinch of smooth jazz

2018
01:35:25,386 --> 01:35:26,718
on the Panda.

2019
01:35:27,347 --> 01:35:28,713
And I have one question for you.

2020
01:35:28,806 --> 01:35:30,047
Do you know what time it is?

2021
01:38:52,844 --> 01:38:55,336
You know. Last year, the folks
at St. Benedict's, they...

2022
01:38:55,596 --> 01:38:57,178
They had a... A modern-dress Nativity.

2023
01:38:57,348 --> 01:39:00,637
Everybody hated it at first,
but you know the folks at St. Benedict's,

2024
01:39:00,726 --> 01:39:02,183
they got back at 'em, all right.

2025
01:39:02,437 --> 01:39:05,020
They won the prize for most original.

2026
01:39:05,356 --> 01:39:08,520
Then, of course, you have
the Maplewood Christians.

2027
01:39:08,860 --> 01:39:13,195
They had a kind of friendly competition
with the Nazarenes,

2028
01:39:14,198 --> 01:39:17,191
and took all their hay last year.

2029
01:39:17,618 --> 01:39:19,530
Yeah, you just try setting up

2030
01:39:20,705 --> 01:39:22,537
a Nativity without hay.

2031
01:39:22,707 --> 01:39:24,539
Merry Christmas, fellas!