Horsepower #8

Your eye is immediately drawn to the Kings of Speed. Of course you’re gonna visit them. They’re like gods of racing and… wait, what the fuck?

You rub your eyes and recheck the pamphlet to make sure you’re seeing clearly, but the text stubbornly refuses to change. “Normal Pony Equestrian Pony Racing”. That… is a name and a half. You look back over at Dusk, who regards you with casual interest.

“I have to check this out,” you note, and Dusk shrugs as she follows along. Like most of the newbies, their tent is out of the way and it takes you a second to locate it, but it is open for business. You step inside to get a look around. The first view is a striking one. Blankets of green have been hung up all around the inside of the tent, and a couple of tables stand nearby piled high with bunches of different pieces of paper in no particular order. A car sits in the middle, but it looks less like a vehicle made for the most competitive race on the planet and more like someone bought a used sports car from thirty years ago and sprung for the new paint job without any understanding of how a car actually works.

You’re alone for just a second before you find yourself ATTACKED! By a great big hug. An earth pony leaps from the side to grab you and pull you into a big, warm embrace. His strength is terrifying, though he seems to know at least enough not to snap your spine with his hug.. Your breath slowly starts to leak out as the overly friendly pony hugs you tighter and tighter, trying to wriggle your way free with little success. He’s big and he’s friendly and you’re about eighty percent sure he’s not trying to kill you. Not that it makes it any more comfortable to be slowly but forcibly deflated.

“D-dusk,” you wheeze out with your last few breathes of air. The bat pony has been quietly observing the situation and rubs her chin with a fetlock as she tries to figure out a solution. Moving over to one of the tables, she grabs a crowbar that had been mostly obscured by one of the piles of paperwork and inserts it between the foreleg of the stallion and begins to pry. If the stallion minds or notices, he doesn’t speak up about it.

Eventually, you pop free and roll to the ground with a gasp. From your vantage point down below, you get a better view on your assailant. He’s a muscular, grey earth pony with a red heart as his cutie mark and he seems...  dim. But friendly!

“Dude,” you say as you stand back up. “What gives? You could have killed me.”

The stallion looks at you dumbly and offers you a smile scaled to his enormous size. “Hugs are for friends and we are friends now!”

You look at him, confused, but before you can respond you’re almost accosted by another pony. Dusk saves you this time, stumbling into her path so that she can’t quite jump at you.

“No thank you on the hug!” You say as she tries to maneuver around the bat pony with limited success. The pink pegasus pony with a red heart cutie mark started to switch over to Dusk, who seemed to be impossible to hug with her ever so slight movements this way and that. You let loose a low whistle. It’s one thing to see the numbers on a page, but Dusk actually has some moves.

“Alright, ALRIGHT!” you exclaim in protest. “Cool it with the hugs!”

The two ponies look sufficiently chastened and take a step back. Dusk glances over at you, behind your shoulder. You turn around and glare as a third pony, a white unicorn with, yup, a red heart as their cutie mark looms. Their arms are outstretched and ready for a hug, but you point sternly at the line-up and she looks cowed before going to join the rest of her teammates.

“Not cool,” you say. “Just try’na meet you guys, see what’s up, and you jump on me? Not cool.” You’re mostly talking to calm yourself down after that episode. Your feathers are all ruffled and you start to smooth them down. Dusk stands next to you and gives the accused a slow, stern shake of her head.

The three of the ponies look like they’re on the verge of tears by the time you’re done. “I-I’m sorry,” sniffles the unicorn. “Just wanted to give you hug and lots of love because getting love is the best thing to do.”

That does bring up an interesting question. “Do you guys all have the same cutie mark?” You ask. “Are you like twins or something?”

“Triplets,” Dusk offers.

“Yeah, that.”

The ponies look panicked and glance over at each other’s flanks, then huddle in a circle, whispering at each other in what sounds like a fairly intense argument. Eventually, they look back at you and turn to present their cutie marks.

When the Earth stallion shows you his muscular rump, it’s now emblazoned with a wheel. Wait, what? “I am Driver Pony!” He announces confidently.

The pegasus mare has a car. You’re almost certain that wasn’t there before. “I am Mechanic Pony!” She says with a smile before she poses dramatically.

The unicorn mare also has a wheel now wheel. She looks back over at the earth stallion and winces, before turning to the other side to reveal a boxing glove. “I am Fighting Pony!” She says. She looks back over at the other two. “Uh, right?” They nod back at her to confirm her suspicions.

“We are Normal Pony Equestrian Pony Racing!” The pegasus mare announces. “And we are here to earn lo- fame! Here to earn FAME!”

You look at this display with a significant amount of disbelief. Obviously, something is going on here… but can you figure out what? Do you address it with them? And do you have any other questions for them in the course of this conversation?