recordkeeper

-- helperBot
 [HB]
 began pestering prolixCorvid
 [PC]
 at 8:7 --


HB: oh gods

HB: coraxe are you sere answer please

PC: which oh gods is this. the .i.m being eaten by something large and scary. oh gods. or the regular .jenn is traumatized by something unexpected but not really all that strange. oh gods.

PC: there.s sort of a subtle distinction to it.

HB: traumatized but its actually strange

HB: coraxe sis is all my fault

PC: okay i will accept this answer on the grounds that you understand that it.s probably not strange at all.

PC: what did you do.

HB: i am surrounded and covered by grubs and babies

PC: haha.

PC: what.

HB: -- helperBot [HB] sends file whatsehell.jpg --

HB: ;~;

PC: those look suspiciously familiar. jenn. especially the indigo one.

HB: youre on my head why are you on my head

PC: gee i live on a mountain and was raised by a bird who could possibly suspect that grubbly acipit likes high places.

HB: ;~;

HB: youre squishy

PC: okay stop with the sad crying face right now.

HB: and i cant pull you off wisout hurting you

PC: stop that immediately i command you as a highblood or whatever the fuck i have to say to get you to do what i want.

HB: ;~;

PC: stop stop stop and leave me alone i.m probably real comfortable.

HB: you just farted on me

HB: and are trying to eat my hair

PC: i.m a grub. i haven.t read about social ettiquite yet.

PC: and your hair looks kind of delicious. i have to admit. i can.t blame current.past.grub.me.

HB: sis is weird and uncomfortable and GAH NOT THE HORNS

PC: they.re horns. it.s not like you can feel them. quit picking on me.

PC: can.t you pick on weird half.grub you.

HB: she is using my chest for a pillow

HB: i basically cant move except to type because everyone is all over me

PC: are you saying you felt yourself up as a child.

PC: no wonder you.re so fucked up. wow.

HB: apparently ;~;

PC: stop stop stop stop stop

HB: i snore

PC: shake yourself.

HB: but

HB: sen ill start crying

HB: and sen everybody else will start crying

HB: and sen ill start crying again

PC: okay then don.t do that.

HB: help

PC: what.s there to help with. it sounds great.

HB: do you want to trade places or somesing

PC: yeah sure just send .em over to me. i.ve got a pile of rusty scrap metal for them to play in.

HB: but sen wed all die and sen where would we be

PC: not playing this stupid game which is pretty much an upgrade in my opinion but okay let.s assume it.s a good idea not to kill grub.us.

PC: what do we even do with them.

HB: i dont know sere arent any instructions and nobody will get off me sey cry if i try to move sem

PC: look around you. is there anything distinctly shiny that isn.t attached to something and is within arm.s reach..

HB: uh no but my glasses are in my sylladex would sat work

PC: throw them and see how many of the grubs come off. i am guessing pretty much all of them are going to go for it.

HB: ok

PC: i mean it works for birds.

HB: you wont move and im still asleep but everyone else did

PC: yeah i.m pretty much stuck on there for life. hope you don.t like wearing hats.

HB: are you saying you remember sis

PC: i.m saying your head looks like a comfortable place to sit and nothing more.

HB: .-.

PC: you.ve probably got about fifteen seconds before they realize not everybody can wear the glasses at once. my recommendation to you is this.

PC: run.

HB: Why??

HB: Finally got me off but it's like you were superglued to my hair.

PC: the fact that we.re all here means it works out eventually. and they probably don.t eat each other. but the wailing and crying will probably destroy you.

HB: Oh jeeze

HB: ... WHY ARE YOU STILL ON MY HEAD SE REST OF SEM ARE GONE

PC: haha. what. really. that.s amazing.

PC: wait what did you

HB: ;~; and and and youre being adorable and fffffffff

PC: did you murder the rest of the grubs how are they gone.

PC: i.m not sure i trust you with grub me. jenn arcana.

HB: No I hit a button and I sink it was a disappearifier?

PC: oh. well. then.

HB: But

HB: You're still on my head

PC: well. you managed to get the rest of them off. it couldn.t just take your head with. probably.

HB: -_-

PC: well. are you getting along with him.

PC: me.

PC: us.

HB: I sink so?

HB: You just went to sleep I sink

PC: just leave him. then.

HB: Wis a deas grip.

PC: yeah it.ll be fine. just keep doing whatever you were doing before you made horrible mutant you and the assorted grubs.babies.

HB: >8( Sanks for making me feel better about sis Coraxe.

PC: what am i. your moirail.

HB: 8P

HB: You know se answer as well as I do.

PC: maybe grub.me can moirail you.

PC: he.s not doing anything.

HB: Except sleeping.

HB: Which... really isn't a good sing.

PC: why not.

HB: Does my head look like a recupracoon?

PC: well. you.ll just have to sort of douse your hair in sopor occasionally.

PC: it.ll be fine. i.m sure. and not lead to sleep.avoidance habits i.ve had in place for sweeps.

HB: .__________________. I can hope at least...

HB: Guess I'll work on getting out of here and back to fighting.

PC: i.m here talking to you. aren.t i. obviously it turns out fine.

HB: I guess. Still sort of worries me.

PC: you can pretty much take it as indication that your head is invincible until i.m off. well.

HB: Well?!

PC: unless this is a doomed timeline and we.re all going to die but hey that.s not exactly a pleasant thought so let.s just cut that off right there.

HB: Yeah.

HB: My head is invulnerable until you come off. Duly noted.

HB: Just have to hope I can find somesing to use for a diaper.

PC: don.t take this as license to go around headbutting things all the time.

PC: if you disturb me. i will be cross.

HB: 8P

PC: i don.t know how you thought this was weird. it.s just temporal mechanics and cloning.

HB: .__________. and you as a grub welding yourself to my hair.

PC: even grub me likes you. stop making faces and be appreciative.

HB: ... Sis is true. I just know babies have no control over certain bodily processes and don't want sat on me.

HB: Also what do grubs even EAT?

PC: you still got any of those meaty little imps running around.

HB: In some tanks around here.

PC: well there you go then

HB: ._. Ah yes. Raw meat.

PC: not exactly spoiled for choice on source. or i would have recommended something with a little more fluffsheep. got to get used to that early.

HB: Hrm. Well if you have any I can alchemize some next time I'm near someone's house.

HB: Hive.

HB: Whatever.

PC: i like to call them unwieldy towering monstrosities these days.

PC: well. not the one i had a hand in. that one is beautiful. the rest are terrible though.

HB: Sat too. So many stairs. 8\

HB: XD

HB: Yeah. Hrm... okay good old shirt and pad... AHHA. Diaper GET.

PC: have i ever mentioned how strange it is to announce things that way.

HB: Probably?

PC: probably like four times.

HB: Yeah, sounds about right.

PC: the basic point here is that you.re weird. weirder than grub me on your head.

HB: No grub you on my head is still se weirdest sing here.

PC: i disagree.

HB: ... you giggle.

PC: i. uh. i don.t really do it in front of anybody. but yeah. i still do that.

HB: Hehehehehe 8)

PC: look out for the maniacal laughter. too.

HB: XD hee

HB: Yeah okay I should probably cut some of sese up you're trying to eat my hair again.

PC: feed me.

HB: Don't even

PC: feed me. feed me. jenn.

HB: I will eat you.

PC: see. raw meat. even grub meat. i.ve been telling you.

HB: 8P

PC: i might have to try imp for myself. see how grub me likes it.

HB: It is really hard to get sem not to just turn into grist while butchering sem.

PC: who said anything about butchering. just tear a nice little hole in there and hold the imp up.

PC: actually. that might not work either.

PC: hey. question. how do you feel about your denizens.

HB: I like kitties.

HB: 8C Kitties are not edible.

PC: everything.s edible but okay.

HB: Birds aren't edible and neiser are kitties. 8|

PC: i see your point slash implied threat.

HB: 8) Excellent.

PC: maybe one of our partners hasn.t been pulling their weight lately and could stand to lose a finger. that.s an option. right.

HB: Nnnnno.

HB: Don't you have any fluffsheep meat anywhere?

PC: probably. i guess. if we.re going to go the boring route.

HB: Yeeees.

PC: ugh. humanity. never up for a little goodspirited cannibalism.

HB: Not unless we're starving and sere's no oser food source.

PC: anyway. get grub.me fed and we.ll work the whole business out. maybe some kind of sopor.shower.cap.

HB: Yeah. We'll work it out. I found somesing. Had some of last night's dindin in here for some reason.

PC: i think i talked to a troll named dindin once. presumably we do not mean the same person.

HB: Dindin = dinner

PC: dinner = dinner

PC: doubling the first syllable of a word = nonsense

PC: you know. for the record.

HB: If you say so Corcor

PC: i.m going to pretend you didn.t call me that for the sake of your not being ready to handle a real. proper kismesis.

HB: o_O Oki?

PC: the basic gist is stop that right now.

HB: Okay.

HB: 8) I'll save it for grub you.

PC: acceptable. for now.

HB: Oki 8)

PC: actually i will revise my earlier statements. this is getting a little weird.

HB: Told you.

PC: you.re not going to suddenly start showering me in lususly affection or anything. right.

PC: i get enough of that from my lusus.

HB: ... 8)

PC: oh god it.s all your fault everything that was wrong with grub me

HB: XD

HB: Yeah right.

PC: we.ll see. jenn. we.ll see.

HB: I suppose we shall.

PC: if you haven.t noticed. by the way. i.m always right. always.

HB: Just 99.99% of se time.

PC: functionally equal.

HB: 8P

HB: see you soon!