Just A Few More...

Dec 9th, 2017
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  1. >Be Anon
  2. >Or Prince Anonymous, First of your Name, Lord of "human lands"
  3. >You didn't know why the Canterlot pone nobles called you that
  4. >You liked Anon just fine, and it wasn't like you had any land in "the human lands"
  5. >Hell, back home you didn't even own a fucking house
  6. >You barely owned your car dammit
  7. >But, up here in the horse capital the horse nobles cared about this sort of thing
  8. >You couldn't marry Celly without having a title of some kind without there being a huge fuss
  9. >So, in the span of a single afternoon, you were knighted, given fake lands, and risen to the title of duke
  10. >It was all very professional and solumn
  11. >Fleur de Lis was nice enough to knight you in Donut Joe's shop
  12. >Your stallion buddies were really happy about you
  13. >They said something about you being the first stallion that had been knighted in two hundred years
  14. >Joe was even nice enough to give you a donut on the house
  15. >Celestia have probably been the happiest though
  16. >She had been so happy that she had pulled out a ring and gotten down on her horse knee right there
  17. >The big turd
  18. >YOU were gonna be the one to do that whole proposal thing first
  19. >Still though, the results were the same
  20. >The two of you got married, you both partied until you dropped after the ceremony, and woke up the morning after hungover, exhausted, and ready to spend the rest of forever together
  21. >Forever was gonna be a long time, but it had been pretty great as of now
  22. >The castle was nice, you had someone to snuggle with every night
  23. >Whenever you felt like it you could demand that the guards carry you around on their backs
  24. >You never did of course, but what mattered was that you COULD
  25. >...Probably
  26. >At that moment, you were lying on the ground in the middle of the royal guards
  27. >You were in your royal pajamas, wearing your royal sunglasses
  28. >Your royal metal cup was sitting next to you filled with royal orange juice
  29. >Your eyes were closed, and in your wife's sun you were trying to get a bit of shut eye
  30. >Not too much
  32. >You just wanted a nap
  33. >Thirty minutes, maybe an hour tops and you'd be as right as rain...
  34. >"Daddy? Daddy?"
  35. >A tiny hoof tapped your side twice
  36. "Hmm?" you said, not opening your eyes
  37. >There was a pause before you felt someone crawling on top of you
  38. >It wasn't a big someone
  39. >Not your wife at least
  40. >Thank goodness
  41. >No, this someone was much smaller
  42. >A bit bigger than filly size if you had to guess
  43. >"Daddy, are you dead?" the someone asked, rubbing their muzzle against the tip of your noise
  44. >You cracked open an eye
  45. >Two big, purple eyes were there to greet you, staring down at your tired self with concern
  46. "No honey, I'm not dead," you said, yawning. "Daddy's just trying to take a nap."
  47. >The purple eyes drew back, allowing you to see the cutest little face in the world
  48. >She looked so much like her mother that it was scary, though with pink hair instead of the rainbow, wavy stuff
  49. >She was big for her age, and already smarter than you
  50. >She was so smart, in fact, that she got an A+ on her math test
  51. >And it was a doozy too
  52. >Addition with triple digit numbers
  53. >It was your little girl Dawn
  54. >"How come?" she asked, cocking her head to the side as she laid down on top of you
  55. "Because your little sister was up all night being grumpy, sweetie," you said, placing a hand on her back
  56. >"Why was she being grumpy?" Dawn asked, making a happy little sound as you gave her back a scratch
  57. "Because the weather ponies brought those rainclouds too close to the castle last night, and Radiance got a little scared,"you told her, letting your eyes slip closed.
  58. >Though you didn't see it, your little girl puffed up
  59. >"I wasn't scared though, daddy. I wasn't scared at all," she said proudly
  60. "I'm sure you weren't, pumpkin," you said, letting your hand make it's way up her toward her head. "But your little sister was, and me and mommy had to spend the whole night making her less grumpy."
  61. >It wasn't that bad
  62. >You had spend sleepless nights watching your kids before
  64. >Hell, when Dawn was still in diapers you had had to deal with her screaming so loud one time that she broke every window in the castle
  65. >The shit was nuts
  66. >Your eardrums had popped like plastic bags
  67. >Dawn's diaper had exploded off her body, sending baby horse shit flying in all directions
  68. >It was a night...
  69. >Your daughter leaned down and nuzzled your chin
  70. >"If you're tired does that not mean that you don't wanna play with me then, daddy?" she asked
  71. >You gave her ear a scratch
  72. "No, no, sweetie. Just give daddy a few minutes and he'll play with you
  73. >Dawn made a sound of content as you played with both of her ears
  74. >She rested her head onto your shoulder
  75. >Her wings, which would have been large on most kids twice her age, settled on either side of you
  76. >"Okay daddy, I'll wait," your little girl said
  77. >You leaned up and gave her forehead a kiss
  78. "Thank you honey."
  79. >With that, wonderful quiet descended upon the royal garden for a few minutes
  80. >In that time your wonderful little girl got bored though, and decided to break it
  81. >"Momma said that she wanted to have another baby."
  82. >...
  83. >Both of your eyes snapped open
  84. >Picking your head up, you looked at your little Dawn
  85. "She said what now?" you asked
  86. >"When I was helping momma and aunt Luna changing Radiance's diapers she said that she wanted another baby," Dawn said with a nod. "Momma said she wanted to have two colts."
  87. >You blinked
  88. "I thought she just wanted a baby," you said
  89. >"Momma wanted to try to have twins," Dawn replied
  90. >Out of the corner of your eye, you could see a flash of white
  91. >Looking over, you saw your wife
  92. >She had your other little girl resting on her back, thankfully snoozing
  93. >She was staring at you meaningfully, pointing at her belly
  94. >You licked your suddenly dry lips
  95. >Wew...
  98. ~_~_~_~_~_~
  102. >Be Lady High Horse, Duchess of Colterberry
  103. >Today you were in the mighty city of Canterlot
  104. >Usually such a thing would be a cause for celebration
  105. >You'd socialize with the ponies that needed to be socialized, go to the right parties
  106. >Maybe you'd feel particularly frisky and find some dim peasant colt to rut
  107. >Unfortunately, however, your plans for a nice, quiet few days had been dashed
  108. >Princess Celestia, for the last THREE days, had moved back your scheduled appointment
  109. >You, a duchess, had been asked to come back day after day only for the Day Court to end!
  110. > You liked to think yourself a very patient mare, but that patience was beginning to wear very thin
  111. >So you had decided to get up bright and early on the fourth day to have your plea heard
  112. >While most of Canterlot had been asleep you had marched up to the castle
  113. >Even then you weren't the first in line to meet the princess, but that was fine
  114. >Today you'd get what business you needed done then you could relax before having to go home to your whale of a husband
  115. >Or so you thought
  116. >"Byebye! Have a good day Mrs. Highlight!"
  117. >Princess Celestia, for some unfathomable reason, had decided to bring her children to the Day Court
  118. >You actually didn't have a problem with this on paper
  119. >All of the royal family members should learn what it means to wear the crown at a very early age
  120. >But they should be out of sight and mind, listening QUIETLY
  121. >Instead of that, however, Princess Celestia had her daughter's right in center stage
  122. >Princess Dawn wa sitting next to her mother, while Princess Radiance was tucked into Princess Celestia's wing
  123. >The youngest of the royal family was, thankfully, sleeping
  124. >Princess Dawn however, had decided to be vocal for the ENTIRE length of the court
  125. >"Next pony please!" the young princess chirped, waving some earth pony farmer forward
  126. >The farmer, a small smile on his face make is way toward the throne and bowed
  127. >"Good morning, mister!" Princess Dawn said
  128. >The stallion chuckled
  130. >"Good morning to you too, your highness," he said, bowing just a hair lower
  131. >Half of the court chuckled as the young princess bowed her head as well
  132. >As they had done EVERY SINGLE TIME she had done so
  133. >Which was EVERY SINGLE TIME another pony stepped forward
  134. >You found yourself gritting your teeth
  135. >Usually the Day Court was an efficiently run machine, but today it was nothing more than a madhouse
  136. >And what did Princess Celestia do?
  137. >Did she bring order to her court, silence her little brat so that it didn't take thirty minutes for a single pony to get heard?
  138. >No
  139. >She just sat there, a smile on her face
  140. >It wasn't her normal smile either
  141. >It was smug
  142. >You, along with half of Equus knew that she had twins on the way
  143. >A colt and filly, if what ponies were saying were true
  144. >It was barely noticeable, but you could see a slight bump in the alicorn's stomach
  145. >More alicorn half-breeds...
  146. >You bared your teeth at the thought
  147. >But you weren't angry
  148. >No; you were happy!
  149. >Happy!
  150. >For hundreds of years you and every royal house in Equestria had been trying to woo Celestia and create a dynasty with absolutely no luck
  151. >No amount of magic, no careful breeding would make mortal seed take in an alicorn's womb
  152. >But some alien comes and does it first try!
  153. >You were HAPPY for the Princess, as was everypony else
  154. >Happy that she was sitting there with that smile of hers, lording her children over you
  155. >"Thank you very, much, your highness."
  156. >"Aha. Thank you too, Mr. Hoe. I hope your tools get better now!"
  157. >You jumped in surprise as the farmer brushed past you
  158. >Looking around the courtroom, you saw that nopony else was in front of you
  159. >...
  160. >You were next!
  161. >Brushing down your vest and adjusting your hat, you puffed your chest out
  162. >Alright!
  163. >Now you could finally get some bucking work done!
  164. >Princess Dawn's deep purple eyes settled on you
  165. >She smile, and you had to resist the urge to shudder when you saw her long, unnatural fangs
  166. >Sweet maker...
  167. >"Next pony pleas--"
  169. >Princess Celestia perked up
  170. >Frowning, she leaned toward Princess Radiance and sniffed the air
  171. >"Oh. It looks like somepony went poppy," she said out loud
  172. >You deflated
  173. >Your smile turned into a look of horror
  174. >Whatthebuckdidshejustsay?!
  175. >You looked around, hoping to see some level of outrage from the rest of the court
  176. >To your surprise, there was absolutely none
  177. >Ponies were just standing there, smiles on their faces as Princess Celestia levitated her daughter out from under her wing
  178. >"Ewww!" Princess Radiance said, covering her nose. "She stinks!"
  179. >"You used to stink just as bad when you were little," Princess Celestia said, setting Princess Radiance in her lap
  180. >With a spell, she summoned a diaper, baby powder, and baby wipes as she tied her mane back
  181. >"High Horse, please come forward," she said, tugging at her daughter's diaper. "I can do to things at once. Just mind the smell. My husband wanted little Radiance here to try a new baby food and it's not agreeing with her very well."
  182. >...
  183. >This court is a bucking madhouse...
  186. ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_
  189. >"Come on. Who's my big girl? Who's my big girl? Come on, open your mouth. There you go!"
  190. >Be Princess Luna
  191. >Princess of the Night, Lady of Dreams
  192. >It was very early, which meant that it was very, very late for you
  193. >Your sister's sun had just risen in the sky and you, exhausted from your nightly duties, had found yourself in the royal dining room
  194. >Usually, you'd only spend a spare few moments here
  195. >At most you'd say goodnight to your sister and get something to nibble on before returning to your room for a bath and your bed
  196. >But today you were indulging in one of your new hobbies
  197. >Sitting at the royal dining table, feeling exhausted, you watched as the rest of your family ate
  198. >Now, most ponies would think that this was no hobby
  199. >For most, it wouldn't be, no matter where or who you are eating is simply eating
  200. >But that was not the case with your sister, her husband, and her daughters
  201. >"Momma, can I have another dippy egg?"
  202. >"Oh course you can, honey. And here, have some more toast."
  203. >Laid out on the table were plated stacked high with food
  204. >Pancakes, waffles, toast, fruit; anything and everything that one ate at breakfast
  205. >To normal ponies this would have been more than enough for a group of thirty, but for those four they'd no doubt be asking for more
  206. >"Honey, don't mean against the table like that, it's rude."
  207. >"Yes daddy."
  208. >Anonymous had already eaten enough for five ponies
  209. >Dawn was on her third plate of food eyeing the bacon that the cooks had just brought in
  210. >Anonymous had already fed Radiance three vials of baby food and was currently feeding her a big bowl of cereal that had soaked in milk for a few minutes
  211. >Your sister, who had already been a big eater, had only grown more insatiable with her pregnancy
  212. >She had easily eaten more than her husband and didn't seem to be slowing down
  213. >Pancakes, eggs, even pork bacon and sausage weren't safe from her
  214. >You knew from experience that nothing would be left by the time Celestia took Dawn to school
  216. >Not a crumb, not a piece of toast, nothing
  217. >It was terribly fascinating to watch
  218. >Almost as if you were watching a pack of wild beasts picking a carcass clean
  219. >"Honey, would you be a dear and pass me another stack of pancakes please?"
  220. >"Of course, hon."
  221. >Little Radiance let out a giggle
  222. >Babbling her baby talk, her bright purple eyes wandered toward a plate full of bacon
  223. >The baby's eyes widened
  224. >You could see drool making it's way down her lip
  225. >The tip of her horn glowed, levitating a piece of bacon into the air toward her
  226. >And, before anypony could stop her, the youngest of the royal family popped the bacon into her mouth with a happy babble, nomming on it with a look of content
  227. >Oh dear...
  228. >Another one's gotten the taste of meat...
  231. ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_
  235. "Please go to bed. Please? Pretty please?"
  236. >You had no idea what time it was
  237. >For people like you, time was absolutely meaningless
  238. >You were above such things
  239. >You had ascended to worse and terrible things
  240. >What you did know was that you were tired
  241. >Very tired
  242. >The kind of absolute, terrible exhaustion that only a parent and engineering student could experience
  243. >But did you know who DIDN'T feel exhausted
  244. >Babies
  245. >Nope
  246. >A fucking baby could stay up forever and feel perfectly FINE, as your little girl Radiance had been more than happy to demonstrate
  247. >The little turd was sitting in your lap being fussy
  248. >She was holding one of your hands between her hooves and had taken it upon herself to stick your whole hand into her mouth
  249. >You had no idea why she needed to do this
  250. >Perhaps she knew something about your hand that you didn't
  251. >Maybe it gives alicorns superpowers or something
  252. >Usually, you wouldn't allow such a thing to happen
  253. >But you honestly didn't have the energy
  254. "Come on, honey. Go to sleep for daddy," you begged. "Just for a little bit. A few hours. Please."
  255. >For the last two days you had been up because Radiance, who you and Celly were trying to get into a more solid diet, was a bit backed up
  256. >The doctor said that it was perfectly normal
  257. >It happened to most kids her age
  258. >All you needed to do was keep giving her fluids and she'd have a big ol' poop and everything would be great
  259. >But it wasn't great
  260. >There wasn't any rainbows or happiness on this side of the train track, jack
  261. >No matter what you did, what you gave her, what deals you made to dark, horrible gods, your little girl wouldn't fucking poop
  262. >And, since your fucking wife didn't want you giving your little girl an enimina, you couldn't shove anything up her butt to uncork all of this shit
  263. >So she was fussy
  264. >And she didn't sleep
  265. >And you were tired
  266. >And you wanted to go to bed
  267. >Radiance let out an unhappy babble, pawing at your chest
  268. >Your eyes, which you hadn't even realized were closed, snapped open
  270. "Wha--?"
  271. >You looked around your bedroom with half-lidded, bloodshot eyes
  272. >Your daughter made more upset baby noises
  273. "It's fine, it's fine," you said, rocking her on your knee. "Daddy's here. Daddy's here and he wants to throw you out a window, you little turd."
  274. >Radiance babbled some more, ruffling her wings before settling herself in your arms
  275. >You leaned down to give her head a kiss, holding back a sob
  276. "Please go to bed? At least poop. You're so tiny; your body will explode if you hold in that much shit."
  277. >Out of the corner of your eye, you could see your sleeping wife
  278. >She had, time and again, offered to watch your youngest for a bit, but every time you had refused
  279. >She already had enough shit to worry about
  280. >Your wife was a fucking princess AND teacher
  281. >She also needed to rest for the twins
  282. >But that didn't mean you weren't as salty as fuck that she was sleeping though
  283. >Because you were
  284. >You wanted to sleep so fucking bad...
  285. >Your daughter squirmed in your lap
  286. >You kind of ignored her, too focused on how shitty you felt
  287. >It was only when you heard her grunt did you look down
  288. >There was a look of extreme concentration on Radiance's face
  289. >Her wings were tucked tightly against her sides, and she was pressing her knees together
  290. >...
  291. >Was...?
  292. >Was she...?
  293. >A feeling which hadn't lingered in your being for what felt like an eternity welled up inside of you
  294. >Hope
  295. "Yeah, come on, honey, you can do it!" you said. "Poop! Poop your brains out!"
  296. >A sob escaped you as you smelled that familiar smell
  297. >Oh lord...
  298. >Oh Jesus...
  299. >Your daughter pooped
  300. >She fucking pooped!
  301. >Tears in your eyes, you let out a little laugh as you kissed the top of her head
  302. >This was the greatest fucking day of your life!
  305. ~_~_~_~_~_~_~
  308. >Be Anon
  309. >It was very, very early
  310. >The sun still stayed below the mountaintop
  311. >You were in your warm, comfortable bed
  312. >Your beautiful, wonderful wife was lying next to you, her chin resting on top of your head and a wing laid over you
  313. >Your eyes were closed
  314. >You were warm and comfortable
  315. >For most people, this would have been a good thing
  316. >But you weren't most people
  317. >There was to be no joy in your existance
  318. >Last night you and Celestia had gotten home late after taking Dawn and Radiance to horse Chuckie Cheese
  319. >Both of the girls had been bouncing off the walls when you got home, so they had gotten to bed EXTRA late
  320. >Which was fine for them
  321. >Radiance was a baby, and Dawn didn't have to go to school for the next two days
  322. >But you and Celestia had to get up to go to some thing
  323. >And you didn't want to go to that fucking thing
  324. >You wanted to lie here and go to sleep, because you were a hardworking parent and you deserved some fucking shuteye
  325. >Which is why you laid there, holding onto Celestia, mad as all hell, with your eyes closed
  326. >Your wife was going to have to get up soon to raise the sun
  327. >About five or six minutes in fact
  328. >And how would you know this?
  329. >Because you had been fucking getting up at this fucking time for so fucking long that you didn't even need a fucking alarm clock
  330. >Fucking, fucking, fuck
  331. >And you knew as soon as that alarm rang your spirit would drift off into the sky, and your body would spontaneously combust
  332. >You let out a sigh, snuggling into your wife's tuft
  333. "Hon? Are you awake?" you asked, sounding absolutely exhausted
  334. >Celestia nuzzled the top of your head
  335. >"Yes dear," she answered, sounding just as tired
  336. >You tried to crack open an eye but couldn't quite manage it
  337. "We gotta get up soon."
  338. >"I suppose we do. I need to raise the sun and we need to be at the fundraiser."
  339. >You felt something in your snap
  340. >Nothing too important, or big, but you felt it
  341. >Nose scrunching up, you let your mind chug along with the thinky-thoughts
  343. "Hon, you know there's only two things in their whole world that I love more than you right?" you mumbled
  344. >One of Celestia's hooves made its way down your side
  345. >Her belly, which seemed to be growing later by the day, pressed against your back
  346. >"Four, dear," she replied
  347. >You nodded slowly, grabbing her hoof and hugging it between your arms
  348. "I think I'm gonna put my foot down today," you said slowly, carefully selecting each word. "We've been working so hard and we deserve a bit of a break."
  349. >For several seconds, the only thing you could hear were the sounds of Celestia's gentle breathing as she considered your words
  350. >"As much as I would enjoy a day off we need to go to that orphanage, dear."
  351. >Your nose scrunched up
  352. "Us not being there for a day isn't gonna cause it to fucking explode," you grumble. "They'll be plenty of orphans for us when we finally do get around to going."
  353. >Again your wife paused
  354. >You could sense that she was collecting her thoughts
  355. >Oh no...
  356. >That wouldn't do...
  357. >She wasn't bringing any logic to this...
  358. "Hon, I swear to god if I hear that alarm ring I'm going to light this whole city on fire," you threatened, trying to sound as nefarious as possible and ending up just sounding exhausted
  359. >Celestia let out a sigh
  360. >You heard her horn glow
  361. >Cracking open an eye, you saw her unplug your alarm, pick it up into the air, and toss it into the trash
  362. >A moment later, you could see the sun beginning to rise
  363. >Yawning, Celestia gave your head a nuzzle
  364. >"I'm sure they'll forgive us if we reschedule," she whispered
  365. >Smiling, you closed your eye as you brought her hoof to your lips and kissed it
  366. "Thanks hon."
  367. >With that, the two of you laid still, both of you finally ready to--
  369. >From the far end of the room you could hear screaming
  371. >Your little Radiance, if you weren't mistaken
  372. >"Daddy? Mommy?" come one that sounded a lot like your other bucket of sunshine Dawn. "I don't feel good..."
  373. >Cracking open an eye, you saw your little girl staring at you front across the room
  374. >Her pure white coat had a tint of green to it and, if you weren't mistaken, it looked like she had vomit all over her chest
  375. >Radiance, not one to be forgotten about, grew just loud enough to shake the windows in your room
  376. >...
  377. >Huh...
  378. >That's weird...
  379. >It's raining in your bedroom...
  382. ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~
  385. >Be Anon
  386. >You were lying in your bed with your wonderful wife
  387. >Your little Dawn was over at some sleepover with your friends from school
  388. >Radiance was out like a light in her crib
  389. >Both you and Celestia were lying on your sides
  390. >Your back was pressed against your wife's swollen belly, your head under her chin
  391. >All four of her hooves were wrapped around you loosely
  392. >You could feel her tail near your feet
  393. >One of her big white wings were draped over your body
  394. >It was one of your favorite positions
  395. >Usually, it'd put you right to sleep, no matter what time or day it was or how well rested you were
  396. >From Celestia's gentle breaths, you knew that she was already taking advantage of this lull in the chaos
  397. >But there was a problem...
  398. >You had to pee
  399. >Pretty badly in fact
  400. >For the last ten minutes you hadn't wanted to get up, mostly because you were too comfortable, but now it was starting to become an issue
  401. >So you needed to get up...
  402. >But you wanted to get up without waking the love of your life...
  403. >You frowned
  404. >Carefully, you untangled yourself from the mass of limbs holding you against your wife
  405. >It took some work, but you eventually managed to roll out of bed
  406. >A sigh of relief escaped you as you looked toward your bathroom
  407. >Thank god...
  408. >Any longer and you might--
  409. >Out of the corners of your eyes,you saw white
  410. >That was the only warning you got before something grabbed your shoulders and pulled you bodily into your bed
  411. >...
  412. >Dammit
  413. >Your wife let out a hum as you were forced back against her
  414. >"And where do you think you're going, my sunshine?" she whispered, nuzzling the top of your head even as her hooves rewrapped around you
  415. >You squirmed
  416. "Bathroom, hon.Gotta pee," you said, trying to sit up
  417. >You had managed to rise an inch or so before being forced back against the bed
  418. "Hoooooooon," you whined, doing a prone pee dance
  419. >Celestia kissed the top of your head
  420. >"Anon, my love, my heart, it seems like we're at an impasse."
  421. "...Really?"
  423. "Hon, I need to pee."
  424. >She mumbles something indistinct in her sleep.
  425. "Hon?"
  426. >One eye cracks open, revealing a crescent of magenta.
  427. >Her horn flashes gold briefly, and suddenly the pressure in your bladder vanishes.
  428. >Huh.
  429. >She smirks, and her eye closes.
  430. >Your eyes copy her own a moment later.
  431. >Before you succumb to sleep, a fleeting thought of where your golden glory vanished to crosses your mind.
  432. >Meh, probably in a bush somewhere.
  434. >You are Princess Cadence, on your way back to Canterlot Castle.
  435. >...Something is amiss.
  436. >You pause, looking around and then finally up.
  437. >You see a glimpse of something orange, and then something wet smashes into your face.
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