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a guest Jun 13th, 2018 47 Never
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  1. <LordLicorice> ghosthouse is fucking awful
  2. <Daeren> and ghosthouse is apparently a tour de wtf
  3. <LordLicorice> I mean, it's funny
  4. <LordLicorice> with rifftrax
  5. <LordLicorice> but it's completely fucking warped
  6. <LordLicorice> if you take just half a step back you'll constantly ask yourself wtf is going on
  7. <LordLicorice> because, you can make logical conclusions
  8. <LordLicorice> but the movie doesn't connect the dots for you
  9. <Daeren> also that they reference troll 2 and the room in the first minute or two
  10. <LordLicorice> fuckin' ghosthouse
  11. <LordLicorice> ahaha, yeah they do
  12. <LordLicorice> something about the Troll 2 actor's award
  13. <LordLicorice> for a guy's "scream of terror"
  14. <LordLicorice> it is truly "THEY'RE EATING HER" levels of hilarious
  15. <LordLicorice> it's all completely nonsensical
  16. <LordLicorice> at the end, a number of core elements are just not addressed
  17. <LordLicorice> and you can't even blame, say, excessive use of weed on the production
  18. <LordLicorice> because usually those movies have something """"""artistic"""""" to say
  19. <LordLicorice> or a liberal idiot point
  20. <LordLicorice> there IS no point to ghosthouse
  21. <LordLicorice> nothing
  22. <LordLicorice> makes
  23. <LordLicorice> sense
  24. <LordLicorice> at all.
  25. <LordLicorice> There is no single character in the entirety of the movie that makes a rational decision.
  26. <LordLicorice> Every single action and motivation is nearly arbitrary
  27. <LordLicorice> Hausu had a narrative
  28. <LordLicorice> Even if that narrative was simply "There is a ghost matron that eats children"
  29. <LordLicorice> In this? The ghost's motivation is never explained
  30. <LordLicorice> the doll is never explained
  31. <LordLicorice> the music is never explained
  32. <LordLicorice> the ham radio is never explained
  33. <LordLicorice> the future-hear-your-own-death thing is never explained
  34. <LordLicorice> the black guy's motivation or very existence is never explained
  35. <LordLicorice> (he's a hitchhiker with a fake rubber ghost arm that he uses to prank people, then he shows up again and gets killed)
  36. <LordLicorice> (that is HIS ENTIRE PLOT AND CHARACTER ARC)
  37. <LordLicorice> It's not like, The Room or Troll 2 terrible
  38. <LordLicorice> it's not like anything else, actually
  39. <LordLicorice> it's very surreal
  40. <Daeren> it's a failed attempt at david lynch?
  41. <LordLicorice> this is what happens when spacetime begins to fracture
  42. <LordLicorice> that's what it ends up being
  43. <LordLicorice> but not on purpose
  44. <LordLicorice> what it TRIED to be was a straightforward ghost story
  45. <LordLicorice> what it ENDED UP BEING is a lesson in nonsequitor
  46. <LordLicorice> like if you look up the word in the dictionary, "See: Ghosthouse" is the only entry
  47. <LordLicorice> because NOTHING FOLLOWS ANYTHING
  48. <LordLicorice> also we get to hear a lot of Kevin's wonderful singing talent
  49. <LordLicorice> and that's not a joke
  50. <LordLicorice> he's actually got a pretty great voice
  51. <LordLicorice> and he sings lyrics to the soundtrack they made up
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