Skittows Stowies Wun: Adumpshun

>Open the door to the pound
>You tell the guy you want one of those fluffy ponies
>He tells you they're selling like hotcakes
>You decided to adopt and not get one from a pet shop because you're a fucking hippie faggot
>He leads you into a back room
>There's a tiny box that's absolutely filled to the brim with the little furballs
>You keep hearing "Pway!" and "Owchies!" and some vague crying from the box
>God, they're all stepping on each other's faces and shit
>Trapped like rats
"Wait, is that them?"
>"Yep."
"ALL of them?"
>"Yeah, man."
"In THERE?"
>"Yeah. Dude, you can't just let these things run around."
"Why not?"
>"'Cause they're dumb as hell! They'll drown or die otherwise in no time. Dude, do you know anything about these?"
"Well, how hard can it be?"
>One of the ponies yells "New fweind!!! Pick wumpsies pwease!!"
>"Do you even have a safe room set up?"
>You think for a sec
"Safe room?"

>"Yeah, just a little enclosed area, maybe with some toys or some shit. You know, so you can leave the house and do shit without them falling off of something or choking on something.
"Huh. I think I have something like that."
>"Hmm."
>For a moment you're afraid he's not going to give you one because you don't seem like the most competent owner, but he bends over and picks up the box
>"Which one."
>You scan around the box of fluffy baseballs
>Spot one that's a dark red
>You watch it squirm around amongst its counterparts until its head appears
>You almost giggle when you see it has a bright pink ring around its neck
>"Puh! Pway! Pick fwuffy! Pway wif fruffy! New fweind!"
>It kinda puckers its lips
>whywubwoo.jpg
>You're sold
"That one."
>"Hmm."
>The guy reaches into the box, shuffles around in it for a bit, then pulls out your new fluffy pony
>It lights the fuck up
>"NEW DADDY!"
>It starts wiggling its hooves like a madman
>Holy shit
>The guy shuts the box, puts it down, and just tosses the pony vaguely in your direction
>"Catch."
>You fucking spring to the left and barely grab it between your fingers
>Holy fuck, it could have died
"What the fuck, man! You could have killed it!"
>"It's a him, by the way. And chill, man, those things are a dime a dozen."

>Your jimmies are still rustled, but you blow it off
>You bring your hand up, the pony still in your fingers
>Your hand turns around, so he's facing you, but he's upside down
>"Yaaayy! Fingie wide!! Gow fyast, gow fyast!"
>Oh god
"Hey, little guy."
>"Daddy!"
"Heh, okay."
>You turn it around and press it against your chest to keep it from further harm
>You follow the guy to the counter, pay for him and leave

>Back home
>This thing has been looking at you for the whole ride home
>Totally silent
>You put it on the kitchen counter and it's still staring at you
"Dude, you okay?"
>"... Dis pwace scawy."
"Aww. It's ok, buddy. This is, uh, your new home. Kay?"
>"... wan' gow home."
"This IS home."
>Silence
"Wanna eat something?"
>His eyes instantly light up
>"Eyt! Wan' hungies!"
"Yeah, I thought you might. Can't imagine they feed you much at that place."

>"I been hungies since fowevow!"
>You go get it some food
>The only thing in there you think it might be able to eat is skittles
>You fill a bowl and plop it down next to him
>"Nummies!"
"Skittles."
>"Skittows!"
>Fuck it
"Hey, lets just make Skittles your name."
>He looks up from the bowl
>"Skittows name?"
"yeah. Your name's Skittles now. Skittles."
>It looks down and back up
>"Yow name daddy now!"
>He tries to climb up on top of the bowl to hug you but it kinda tips it back
>The bowl balances out and settles, thus teeter-totter launching Skittles up for a faceplant in skittles
>Oh god lol

>Skittles looks up from his bowl
>He looks confused, and there's one little green one stuck in his snout
>He bites down, investigating it
>It tastes good
>Chew chew swallow
>He rolls over and starts wiggling his hooves around
>"New daddys nummies! Nummie num!"
>You can't help but laugh out loud
>He starts to slow down the wiggling and rolls over to his side in the nummies
>He leans his head in and grabs another, taking a bite out of it, and letting the excess fall back to the masses
>He eats a few more before falling asleep with one in his mouth
>You guess this bowl of skittles can be his bed for now
>You pick it up as softly as you can and move it to the living room, where you turn on the TV at a low volume
>When he wakes up, he can learn about TV time, you guess.

-END-