zig: yknow
zig: one day
zig: im just gonna pack my shit up
zig: and you'll never hear about me again
strast: u don't just
strast: leave the gamer life behind my friend
strast: it's not that easy.....
zig: yeah it is
zig: its called you delete everyone on steam
zig: and work on maps in isolation
strast: why would u
strast: do that though
strast: what's the point
zig: because frankly i cant take a lot of you people anymore
zig: the madness
zig: i stopped having fun
zig: i dont mean to sound edgy either
strast: u mean on
strast: gmod
strast: or
zig: yes, on gmod
strast: yeah i mean fair enough
strast: it's never been a fun game for me yet i still always come back to it like a retard
strast: maybe we should just..
strast: leave it behind.......
zig: because you guys all have stockholm syndrome or some shit
zig: the only reason
zig: the _ONLY_
zig: reason
zig: I sitll play this game is because i work on things
strast: LOL
strast: STOCKHOLM SYNDROME
strast: i think you're like somewhat right
strast: i had a really good time on this game like 3 years ago on tnb
strast: for like a single month
zig: you guys all sit back
strast: and now whenever i return to it i expect the same thing
zig: and wait
zig: for the time you'll get something good
strast: and it
strast: never actually happens
zig: literally always, you wait and you wait
zig: and it never happens
strast: holy fuck ur
strast: so righ
strast: t
zig: ive watched it for years
strast: ur actually so fucking right
zig: particular with vukovar
zig: it reminds me of the feeling of cocaine actually
zig: not to be gay
zig: but when people first do that shit
zig: they say its the best feeling of their lives
zig: and they never get it again
zig: its the same deal with first time rping
zig: you think its the shit then you become over critical and needy and your quality and standards go up
zig: so high up to the point where you stop finding servers you can play on and enjoy
zig: then you either get stuck in a loop of trying to find the new "best server ever"
zig: or you end up like me and you simply start to operate the curtains that pull and close
zig: frankly im getting bored of making things, i dont feel like theyre very high in quality nor very entertaining yet theyre fetishized because people are that lacking
zig: of that experience they once felt
zig: they think because im actually putting the effort in, and because i'm not running a generic run of the mil hl2rp server im somehow going to save serious roleplay
zig: what they need to realize that just like any kind of wave of people, the meta changes and people develop different interests, and the wave that holds your own interests and interactivity in roleplay has passed.
strast: you've literally just
strast: redpilled me so fucking hard
strast: fuck im such a retard
zig: thats because ive been watching this happen over and over for the past half of a decade with vukovar who has simultaneously joined well over a dozen servers thinking that it was going to be good or that it was going to be one and eventually ended up quitting due to the server actually being toxic/repulsive or simply not good enough-- or the entire thing just collapsing because nobody knows how to run communities anymore.
zig: then people ask me why i dont join any servers but my own, and it's been critiqued in the past that I never finish or release projects
zig: The main reason I never finish or release projects is due to the idea that my own servers will never have the capability to be completely what I want them to be in absolute
zig: And I'd rather not release a project than have it be potentially slandered because it's not perfect
strast: man you're
strast: so fucking right
zig: so after sitting around for nearly half a decade and watching all of this, im really rather tired of it
strast: holy fuck
zig: people aren't interested in what i think roleplay is anymore and that's just how it is now and i have to accept it
zig: fetishized works like alex grist's nebulous have ruined roleplay as a whole, and formulated it into an MMO experience, which in it's own right is fair, but is now marketed as the sole, and only acceptable experience that one can have. People fetishize that server for a multitude of reasons, but it's the last pocket of players who have scrounged themselves to play there. Not once on Nebulous did I ever have an interesting or critical roleplay experience. I watched my friends slowly dwell deeper into some kind of quality hell where they now lick the dirt off of the floor because they don't have anything else to lick.
zig: people add me on steam and look at my shit like kids looking at candy through a window, thinking it's the best shit ever
zig: simply because of how mundane and ritualistic it's all gotten