Apocolypse Anon and Flash Sentry

>You and Flash are sitting on logs, the fire being the only thing lighting the night
>Your name is Anonymous, and you've been grouped with Mr. Sentry to watch for the night
>Somebody had to be with this fucker
>And sadly, that somebody had to be you
>Earlier in the day, everybody had to choose a partner to watch in the night
>Fluttershy could attack at any given moment, with Discord on her side
>So we had to be prepared incase it happened
>Every Anon had either chose another Anon, or a Trip
>God you hated Trips
>Trips were either from Ponychan or /mlp/, honestly nobody could tell them apart
>Very few Trips went with Anons, but you had to feel sorry for the ones that did
>EqD's, or as you call them, QDs, went with mostly themselves, only a couple going with Anons
>Again, you feel sorry for them
>All the ledditors died early on, and only, what, two Tumblrites are still here?
>One is a lady feminist, the other is a man feminist
>Lucky for them, huh?
>No, not at all. The lady-feminist hates the man-feminist, just because he's a man
>Man-feminist hates himself, too, often agreeing with lady-feminist
>You can never help but laugh at them
>But, anyway, Tumblrites grouped with theirselves, Anons with Anons, Trips with Trips, QDs with QDs, yada yada
>And only three lucky ones went with ponies
>A Trip, an Anon, and a QD
>QD went with AJ, Trip went with Lyra, and you ended up with /him/
>Fucking, Flash Sentry
>God you hate this prick
>Even in real life, he's horrid
>He's about as Gary-Stu as Sombra
>The GOOD Sombra, that is
>He's also the leader of the pack
>And he will NOT let you forget that
>"C'mon guys, I'm your leader! You need to do what I say!"
>"Well, that's what leaders are for, right?"
>"Only a leader would be able to do this!"
>"Follow the leader, you guys!"
>God, he's so irritable
>And you have to keep watch with him
>And since most of the humans didn't survive, every night you have to be with this fucker
>At least you picked to be first watch, forcing Flash to pick the same option
>Y'know, get it over with
>...Too bad it's taking forever for this fucking hour to finish
>Shifts are an hour to an hour and thirty minutes, if the watchers heard something
>Usually any rustling in the bushes are just squirrels and such, nothing too serious happens
>Nothing too serious ever happens
>Discord and Fluttershy are too much of pansies to ever send their army at us-
"OW!"
>Sentry lifts his head up and gets into a fighting stance, a spear in his left wing
>"Anon! Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, Sentry. Go back to bed. A flame-spark hit my leg, is all."
>He isn't contempt with your answer, as he slowly approaches you, the spear still in his wing
>"You know who would say that, Anon?"
"Who, Sentry? Please, tell me who?"
>Silence fills the night
>...
>"A... A.... A CHANGELING! HYAAAHH!"
>...
>"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!"

>"Sorry about that, Trip... I thought Anon was a changeling and-"
>"THIS IS WHY PRINCESS LUNA IS BEST PONY, FLASH! THIS IS WHY YOU'RE NOT APART OF THE LUNAR REPUBLIC!"
"Trip, shut the fuck up. We know you're in pain, but you're going to attract the enemy to us if you keep yelling!"
>The whiny bastard puts a hand over his mouth, as you try to delicately pull the spear out of his shoulder
>His thumb starts bleeding from biting on it too hard
>Finally, you rip it right out of him, as his muffled screams fill the air
>You can't help but try to surpress a chuckle, enjoying this bastard's pain
>"Shhh... Shh.... It's okay, Trip. We'll get you all fixed up by the morning. Just try to relax and go to sleep, okay?"
>There goes another one
>It's a surprise that this Trip overhere didn't wake up the rest of them
>Flash starts to work on getting Trip's shoulder and thumb fixed before he bleeds out to death
>"I'm pretty sure there's a pegasus spell book around here somewhere..."
>That's not a thing
>At least, you think, anyway
>Pegasi can't control magic, they're pegasi!
>That's like if Applejack was actually useful past Season 3-
>"Here it is!"
>God damn it
>Should've just let him bleed out to death
>That would've been one less Trip in the world
>Fuck

>"Thanks, Flash. I'm sooooooooo glad that I was saved by you."
>Sarcasm fills the voice of Trip, Flash just smiling all the way
>"No problem, Trip! Anytime!"
>Trip goes back to the sleeping bag he shares with another Trip, thankfully
>You sit back on your log, and so does Flash, sighing
>"Trips, am I right?"
"Oh shut up. Don't try to make this more painful than it needs to be."
>Sentry lowers his head, putting a hoof to his right cheek
>Just a couple more minutes, Anon. You won't have to endure this anymore in just a couple more minutes
>"Sooo..."
>God fucking damn it, Sentry
>"What did you say your wife was called? A wai... why-fah? A why-fu?"
"Waifu, Sentry. It's called a waifu. And she's not a wife, she's someone who you WANT to be your wife."
>"Oh! You mean someone like Twilight?"
>You can only twitch your eye, while trying not to grit your teeth
"Yes, someone like Twilight."
>"Y'know, Twilight would be my perfect waifu. I mean, she's so beautiful, and amazing, and she's just the best."
"Yeah. Tell me about it."
>"Okay! She-"
"I was being sarcastic, Sentry."
>"Oh."
>...
>"So who's your waifu, Anon? We both know that my waifu would be Twilight Sparkle, as she's so great, so beautiful, so-"
"Shut up."
>"Hey, I'm just making conversation! So, who's your waifu, Anonymous?"
"Twilight Sparkle."
>"Oh..."
>BEEEEEP!
>Thank god
>You quickly leave to your sleeping bag, quickly kicking the next watch out in line
>"OW!"
"You're up next, dude."
>As you get into your sleeping bag, you can't help but chuckle at the poor Anon that has to go up with a Trip
>That would be a funny sight, but, you're too tired to even watch
>Yawning, you get all snuggled up in your comfy bag, and start to dose off...