dirtymuffin00

Choo choo motherfucker

Jan 26th, 2015
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  1. Even a little push can make a freight train spiral out of control
  2.  
  3. >This story begins at the ponyville station
  4. >It's night time and there are no ponies insight
  5. >You are anonymous
  6. >You are waiting for your adoptive sister and her friends to get back from some western town
  7. >It wasn't easy growing up in Equestria, you had to deal with teasing, bullying, prejudice and all sorts of shit
  8. >But here you are, 10 years later and now in your 20's and working as a station clerk and apprentice mechanic for the trains
  9. >It was boring work, but it paid well
  10. >Plus it wasn't too bad after you found a way to charge the smartphone that was on your person when you were found you
  11. >You've been entertaining yourself with old roms of Legend of Zelda and Dragon Quest on an emulator app
  12. >Mostly because, you didn't have many friends here
  13. >Your sister tried to get you to hang out with some of her friends, and you have to say that you don't like being around most of them
  14. >The blue one was kind of a cunt, only time that she could be cool was after a few shots of whiskey
  15. >The pink one had too much personality, almost making you wish that you ended up with a gun instead of this phone
  16. >The yellow one didn't have enough personality
  17. >The white one was nice enough to make you clothes
  18. >And there's the horny purple scientist who would coerce you into "experiments"
  19. >You hated her the most
  20. >The clock says it's 0245 and it's time to check for theives again
  21. >You drop a few sesame seeds in your firefly lantern, give it a little shake, and in no time the bugs cause the darkness to recede...somewhat
  22. >About as much as a dozen glowsticks would
  23. >Oh how you hated the "technology" here
  24. >You begin to make your rounds when you bang your knee on something hard
  25. "Aaaahhh fuck"
  26. >"GAAAAHHH"
  27. >Wut
  28. >Did that thing just let out a scream
  29. >You shine your light on the figure to find it had a slight pony form to it
  30. >You're fucking done, why the hell does everything need to be a fucking pony here?
  31.  
  32. >As if it wasn't enough to find horse shit in your wardrobe after the moths got in it
  33. >You ended up with hoof shaped bruises after you decided to explore a dark cave
  34. >Now you have trains too
  35. >You're starting to think that "magic" is just another name for nuclear radiation
  36. >"What are you?"
  37. >The small locomotive speaks
  38. "Um, I'm A-Anonymous, I'm an alien"
  39. "I think"
  40. >"Oh, well my name is Cole, Cole Caboose
  41. >You stop and think
  42. >Cole
  43. >That has to be the closest thing to a normal name that you've heard during your life here
  44. >You mutter it outloud
  45. "Cole"
  46. >"No, it's COAL, as in the type of fuel"
  47. >Should have known better than to trust these pony names
  48. "Well nice meeting you Coal, but I have to splash some cold water on my face to make sure I'm not on tired or on drugs. Bye"
  49. >You begin to leave when the young...er stallion calls to you
  50. >"WAIT, my wheels are stuck, can you please fetch me some oil for them"
  51. >You decide to oblige your bizarre hallucination and grab some oil from your desk
  52. >Even if it was just a figment of your imagination, you still had a job to do
  53. >You apply it to the amalgamation of pony and transportation
  54. >After a few minutes, the train pony is rolling back and fourth on a small piece of track
  55. >The wheels sound a little squeaky, but that will wear off after a little bit of usage
  56. >You begin walking away when you hear something
  57. >"Thank you, I-I mean it"
  58. >You plop down on your chair and stare into the nothingness
  59. >Suddenly, you hear a few loud whistles as a train pulls in
  60. >About fucking time
  61. >Your sis is back
  62. >Six ponies and a dank iguana exit the train
  63. >"Well howdy therr anon"
  64. "Yo AJ, how was your trip?"
  65. >"Apart from the ruffians Ah had ta deal with? It went great"
  66. >She drops a huge bag of money on the counter
  67. >You just stare
  68. >"Anyhow, Ah gotta get this back to the farm, catch ya later"
  69. "See ya"
  70. >Her friends trail behind her, save for one
  71. >Here we go
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