Oh you may not think I'm pretty,
But don't judge on what you see,
I'll eat myself if you can find
A smarter hat than me.

/əʊ juː meɪ nɒt θɪŋk aɪm ˈprɪti |
bʌt dəʊnt d͡ʒʌd͡ʒ ɒn wɒt juː siː |
aɪl iːt maɪˈself ɪf jʊ kæn faɪnd |
eɪ ˈsmɑːtə hæt ðən miː/

[ ʔəu jʉu̯ mɛi̯ nɔʔ θɪŋk ai̯m ˈpʰɹʷɪtɪi̯ |
bɐʔ dəunʔ d͡ʒɐd͡ʒ ɔn wɔt jʉu̯ sɪi̯ |
ɑi̯l̩ ɪi̯t mɑisɛɫf ɪf jʉu̯ kən fɑi̯nd |
ɛi̯ ˈsmɑːtə haʔ ðən mɪi̯ ]



You can keep your bowlers black,
Your top hats sleek and tall,
For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat
And I can cap them all.

/juː kən kiːp jɔː ˈbəʊləz blæk |
jɔː tɒp hæts sliːk ənd tɔːl |
fɔː aɪm ðə ˈhɒgwɔːts ˈsɔːtɪŋ hæt |
ænd aɪ kən kæp ðəm ɔːl/

[ jʉu̯ kən kʰɪi̯p jɔː ˈbəʊləz blak |
jɔː tʰɔp hats slɪi̯k ən tʰɔːl |
fɔː ʔɑɪm ðə ˈhɒgwoːts ˈsoːtɪŋ hat |
and ɑi̯ kən kʰap ðəm oːl ]


There's nothing hidden in your head
The Sorting Hat can't see,
So try me on and I will tell you
Where you ought to be.

/ðɛːz ˈnʌθɪŋ ˈhɪdən ɪn jɔː hed |
ðə ˈsɔːtɪŋ hæt kɑːnt siː |
səʊ traɪ miː ɒn ənd aɪ wɪl tel juː |
wɛː juː ɔːt tə biː/

[ ðɛːz ˈnɐθɪŋ ˈhɪdən ɪn jɔː hed |
ðə ˈsoːtɪŋ hat kɑːnt siː |
səu̯ tʰrɑi̯ mɪi̯ ɒn ənd ɑi̯ wɪɫ tʰɛl jʉu̯ |
wɛː jʉu̯ oːt tə bɪi̯ ]


You might belong in Gryffindor,
Where dwell the brave at heart,
Their daring, nerve, and chivalry
Set Gryffindors apart;

/juː maɪt bɪˈlɒŋ ɪn ˈɡrɪfɪndɔː |
wɛː dwɛl ðə breɪv ət hɑːt |
ðɛː ˈdɛːrɪŋ | nɜːv | ænd ˈʃɪvəlrɪ
set ˈɡrɪfɪndɔːz əˈpɑːt

[ jʉu̯ mɑi̯t bɪˈlɔŋ ɪn ˈɡɹyfindorː |
wɛː dweɫ ðə brɛi̯v ət hɑːt |
ðɛː ˈdɛːrɪŋ | nəːv | and ˈʃɪvɫ̩rɪi̯ |
sɛt ˈɡɹyfɪndorːz əˈpʰɑːt ]



You might belong in Hufflepuff,
Where they are just and loyal,
Those patient Hufflepuffs are true
And unafraid of toil;

/juː maɪt bɪˈlɒŋ ɪn ˈhʌfəpʌf |
wɛː ðɛɪ ɑː d͡ʒʌst ənd ˈlɔɪəl |
ðəʊz ˈpeɪʃənt ˈhʌfəpʌfs ɑː truː |
ænd ʌnəˈfreɪd ɔv tɔɪl/

[ jʉu̯ mɑi̯t bɪˈlɔŋ ɪn ˈhɐfɫ̩pʰɐf |
weə ðɛi̯ ɑ d͡ʒʌst ənd ˈloɪ(ə)ɫ |
ðəu̯z ˈpʰɛi̯ʃn̩t ˈhɐfɫ̩pʰɐfs ɑ tʰrʉu̯ |
and ɐnəˈfɹɛi̯d əv tʰoi̯ɫ̩ ]



Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,
if you've a ready mind,
Where those of wit and learning,
Will always find their kind;

/ɔː jɛt ɪn waɪz ɔʊld ˈreɪvənklɔː |
ɪf juːv ə ˈredɪ maɪnd |
wɛː ðəʊz əv wɪt ənd ˈlɜːnɪŋ |
wɪl ˈɔːlweɪz faɪnd ðɜː kaɪnd/

[ oː jɛt ɪn wɑi̯z ɔu̯ɫd ˈɹɛi̯vŋ̍kʰloː |
ɪf jʉu̯v ə ˈɹɛdɪi̯ mɑi̯nd |
wɛː ðəu̯z əv wɪt ənd ˈləːnɪŋ |
wɪl ˈoːɫwɛi̯z fɑi̯nd ðɜː kʰɑi̯nd ]



Or perhaps in Slytherin
You'll make your real friends,
Those cunning folks use any means
To achieve their ends.

/ ɔː pəˈhæps ɪn ˈslɪðərɪn
juːl meɪk jɔː rɪəl frɛndz |
ðəʊz ˈkʌnɪŋ fəʊks juːz ˈɛnɪ miːnz
tuː əˈt͡ʃiːv ðɛː ɛndz /

[ oː pəˈhaps ɪn ˈslɪðəɹɪn
jʉu̯ɫ mɛi̯k joː ɹɪi̯ɫ̩ fɹɛndz |
ðəu̯z ˈkʰɐnɪŋ fəu̯ks jʉu̯z ˈɛnɪi̯ mɪi̯nz
tʉu̯ əˈt͡ʃɪi̯v ðɛː ʔɛndz ]


So put me on!
/səʊ pʊt miː ɒn/

Don't be afraid!
/dəʊnt biː əˈfreɪd/

And don't get in a flap!
/ənd dəʊnt get ɪn ə flæp/

You're in safe hands (though I have none)
For I'm a Thinking Cap!
/jə ɪn seɪf hændz ðəʊ aɪ həv nʌn fər aɪm ə ˈθɪŋkɪŋ ˈkæp/