My Little Realities: C23 - Sour About Life

My Little Realities: C23 - Sour About Life

>you have a hard time stringing together your thoughts on the way back to Canterlot
>the 5 p0nies… what would they think of you now
>for that matter, what would they think of themselves?
>Fluttershy would be in for all kinds of shock when she wakes up
>you don’t think you’ll be able to face her, let alone your friends
>friends
>that probably doesn’t apply anymore
>on the bright side, pretty much all the Roots were dead
>pretty much all the Changelings were dead
>the ancient evil Discord was put to stone
>everyp0ny should live happily ever after, right?
>it’s not like there would be that many species capable of trans-reality travel that would go out of their way to hunt a pack of magical equines down for not much reason
>you had no way back to your Earth
>Earth had no way and no real reason to chase you across the realities, as this reality wasn’t on the standard waveform selection of the modified VPT bubble device
>regardless of your situation, you weren’t about to kill yourself
>one thing about you, is that suicide was NOT an option
>however bleak and horrible shit may look
>it was bound to get better
>from your point of view, dying was the worst that could happen
>if you were dead, how would anything matter anymore
>see if you’re dead
>you don’t have a say in anything or have the ability to think
>so for you, whatever else happens is meaningless
>it’s an incredibly selfish outlook
>but you believe in it
>so what now?
>now, you had to see if there was anything you could do for those five p0nies
>your return to Canterlot is uneventful
>you are escorted to a lush suite at the Canterlot Castle
>you kinda wonder why
>it’s better than to be escorted to a dungeon or sent to a chopping block
>you may not have done much today, but you’re feeling completely exhausted
>you lay down, bundling up some covers so you could hold something
>your thoughts drift back to the moments before the Elements were used
>the enemy Roots were flooding in by the hundreds towards you all
>the Princesses were barely able to stand
>you would have been able to shoot a few down before they tore into you and the p0nes behind you
>Twilight hadn’t fully recovered from her magical exertion, and as hard as they could buck, it would have made little difference
>even if Twi had managed to teleport the lot of you somewhere safer
>the Roots would have followed you
>they would have multiplied and grown more
>it would have been a massacre across all of Equestria
>you think about when you put on the Element of Kindness
>how everything went black
>you fall asleep
>the darkness was screaming again
>like hundreds or thousands of voices in despair
>you feel the fear coming yet again, like that time you wore the Element
>the foreboding feeling begins to sink in, like last time
>you don’t fucking care anymore
>the fear washes over
>you can’t be bothered to fight it with your own fury, with your own emotional bile
>the rushing panic and terror floods you
>like a ton of bricks
>you wake up, breathing hard, gasping
>hands are shaking
>it takes you a while to calm back down
>the fear
>something is different with that fear
>you slowly fall asleep again
>once more, the dream of your participation comes back
>you shut your eyes and it flows in
>time after time
>but there is something horribly wrong with the intense terror that makes you awake
>it’s not…  it’s not your fear that you feel
>you just can’t understand why, but the fear in the dark isn’t yours
>the darkness screams and you are flooded with fear, but it isn’t yours
>you run through the motions again and again, awake and through your dreams
>who's fucking fear is it?
>you weren’t afraid at the time
>you knew it was going to fuck up horribly
>you didn’t know how, but you knew something was going to go wrong
>but you weren’t exactly afraid at that moment
>you just disagreed whole-heartedly
>you knew that using the Elements of Harmony was the only possible way to live through this
>your one chance in a million
>but it was still wrong
>yet you had to do it
>the p0nies understood that
>they didn’t seem to feel a fear like that either
>you feel washed over with ice cold water from your head down to your spine
>heart stopping, “so cold it burns” kinda cold
>it was the pegasi, the unicorns and the earth p0nies’ fear
>it was their desperation and pain
>it was their begging, their panic
>it was their minds as they knew they were all going to be ripped apart, kicking and screaming
>how they’d never see the ones they loved again
>it was their cry for help
>and you fucking spat in their faces
>you flicked on a flamethrower of cruelty and lit them as they pleaded for one last, gentle act…
>one last gentle act of Kindness
>Fluttershy would have shown kindness to those poor, tortured p0nies
>you curl up and go numb
>sleep does not visit you again
>you spend hours in silence
>there is a knock at the door
>you barely heard it
>you get up
>you stumble to the door
>it’s Princess Celestia
>her face is cold
>she greets you
>it feels like a simple courtesy, she’s just going through the motions for a guest
>you haven’t looked her in the eyes
>she stops talking
>you look into her eyes
>you can’t tell exactly what she’s feeling or thinking
>is that pity?
>not exactly pity
>you’re probably mistaking the hate that she’s probably trying to cover up
>she continued to look into your eyes for a few seconds, and it seemed that her pity grew
>it wasn’t a condescending pity, or a pity with a sense of superiority
>just a deep, respectful pity
>why the fuck would she feel pity for you
“Anon, I think I understand what happened and I’m so very sorry…  I’m sorry”
>the Princess shuts her eyes and tries to apologise again
>she doesn’t understand squat
>why the hell is she sorry
>it wasn’t their fault, Equestria would have fallen to those things
>you don’t really understand why she’s so sorry
>you close the door
>it does not knock again
>sitting down, you wonder what you’re going to do now
>close some deals with Vinyl and settle down
>set off to explore Equestria
>you think about stuff for a while
>wondering if there’s anything worth doing at all
>you know full well that you’re broken
>you know you pretty much won’t be getting over this one
>how you can’t kill yourself, but what else is there to do for a shattered man
>you’re getting hungry
>not sure of how room service works, you step out to get something to eat
>room service is kinda lazy anyway
>you don’t even notice the p0nies staring at you
>you walk into some donut shop
“Well…  Umm…  Hello sir?  What would you like?”
>the earth p0ny is put off, he has of course never seen a human before
>you just point at a tray on the shelf behind him and ask for a box to go
>oh right, money
>you don’t know what to give him
“I can wash your dishes as payment” you state flatly
>he’s almost startled, he hasn’t even finished putting whatever you had pointed at in a 6 pack
“It’s…  It’s on the house, sir” he stutters
>you grab the box and go back to your room
>they seem to be jelly filled powdered donuts
>you eat a couple
>you will need to track down Vinyl to make some money
>you really don’t feel like freeloading right now
>or ever again, especially on p0nies
>you felt pretty ashamed to show your face to them
>you wish Fluttershy all the best, you don’t know if you will see her again
>you’ll probably leave the p0nies and go explore or something
>if not just settle down somewhere quiet and remote
>you spend a couple days alone, in the dark, working down that box of donuts
>you wash your hands and face
>the door knocks again
>you wait until the knocking goes away
>the knocking resumes
>then the door busts open
>Applejack drops back down from her buck
>Pinkie Pie walks in
>Rarity right behind her
>Twilight next to Rainbow
>confused, you wonder why they’re here
>aren’t you like the last person they want to see right now
>you stand up
“Hello.  So what brings you all here?” you ask
>Twilight looks up at you
>her eyes fill with tears
“We’re sorry Anon, we’re all so truly sorry”
>why
“Just what exactly are you apologizing for…  Celestia did the same thing.  I don’t get it.  None of you have anything to be sorry for.  You all did what you had to; you did the only thing you could do at the time.  You saved Equestria.”
>they all start crying
>you don’t know what the fuck is going on anymore
>they all slowly walk up and hug/nuzzle you, crying
>just why
>you feel like you have to comfort them
>you kneel down and hug whatever you can get your arms around
>you spend a couple minutes like this
>you start trying to comfort them as they weep, hooves around you, heads buried in your chest
“It’s okay, everything’s fine now”
>slowly as you cajole and pet away, they calm down
>Twilight finally pulls away
“Anon… You big dumbo, you ended up consoling us when we came here to see if there was anything we could ever do to make you feel better”
>they came here to say sorry, and to console -you-
“Anon, ah really think it couldn’t have gone any worse, but ah don’t thaink it could’a gone any better ay-tall…  We just wanted to say how much we’re sorry that it went down like that” says Applejack
“I’m no good with this mushy feely stuff Anon, but I’m real sorry you got hurt” pitches in Dash
“I thought we should throw you a party, but they all said it wasn’t a good idea right now…  How about tomorrow?” says Pinkie
“If there’s anything we can do, Anon…” finishes Rarity
>these goddamn pones
>they were apologizing for you
>you hug them yet again
>after they left, you went back to your bed
>you fall asleep peacefully