[10:53:36] The cold chill of dead night on a mountain in the middle of nowhere, the only company Itadeki had tonight. It was moreso the only company he wanted than it was the only company he had. He was due another one of these trips, these excuses to avoid going home and get a chance to truly clear his head, work towards his own peace of mind as he walked the long walk the Fourfold path spoke so often about.Silently, the youngster finds himself sitting in the snow once more; the freezing temperatures hardly seeming to bother him anymore after so long up here. It seemed he'd become a regular mountain man in recent years. It was the only place in Agartha he truly got a chance to reflect on himself. "Who am I anymore.... Warrior that seldom fights... Husband that chooses to avoid his wife because she doesn't understand.... Father who can't even be there through the pregnancy... Is this what I've truly allowed myself to devolve to in attempts of self 'improvement'? I thought I was getting somewhere, but here I am finding myself right where I was after branding Kyoki... A broken man with questions of his own purpose and morals. Is it fair of me to treat them this way for the sake of myself? There's no honor in any of this."He exhales slowly, the faint azure aura encircling him as he closes his eyes, watching the mana circuits flicker alight in the jet-black vision. Sparks of brilliant blue dancing across his line of 'sight'. It was no secret Itadeki was powerful, he'd spent so many years striving to be better for the sake of protecting others; but when it came down to it, he always seemed to find himself here, in the middle of nowhere, all alone. Who was he even protecting anymore? Mayumi? The Tseng? No, it seemed he lacked the courage to protect anyone these days. "I need to find myself once more, for I've truly become lost. I can't afford to slip any further away from what I am... Great ancestors, please guide me back on the path of righteousness. Back on the walk I was supposed to take; this journey, it all feels so wrong to me, and I need guidance. Do I dedicate myself to my family, or to my career? Do I retire, or do I continue? I seek these answers, and only you are trusted enough to provide them."Nothing. Silence. No sound save a few stray owls brave enough to battle the climate, and the harrowing stiff winds whistling through the cliff-side valley. There was no one to guide him, no one to aid him in realizing which path he needed to take. He was all alone in this, and for once meditation was not helping. "I simply wished to be stronger, simply wished to make everyone proud of me and yet I can't even be there right now. I am ashamed of what I've allowed myself to become recently... No, I need to right my wrong's. For Dai, for Ren... For Mayumi. This is something I need to make amends for, but I'm simply too afraid of losing her to actually face her, which in itself is losing her... Tch, I truly am a coward it seems. But, I am not going to take it lying, I will stand and fight."*snickt*In a blinding instant, the lad was back on his feet; his unbelievable speed seeming almost like a blurred dance as he finds himself shifting across the mountain valley, katana in tow. If anything, he was simply training the anger out of himself, ruthless levels of ritualistic practice to burn away what little rage he held in his otherwise kind and honest heart. He needed the release, needed to burn off all that energy in the hopes of resting for the first time in weeks, venting frustration and clearing his head.Those same acrobatic movements he'd shown in flurried spars seemed vastly more beautiful in the pale light of the moon; the young samurai finding himself almost smiling as the rays cast down onto the silvery texture of his blade, his movements through the trees rapid, split-second instinctive switches of paths and changes of direction allowing him to cover a large portion of the forest in unbelievable speeds. Hacking and slashing away at targets that weren't even there, a shadow-fight if ever there was one.Eventually, he found himself standing beside a building, having lept atop a cliff in one final motion. He didn't seem to remember it being here before, but he'd arrived now, and he might as well have taken a look inside. "A chance to rest.... Away from everyone else.. I'll go back after a nap."
(Itadeki Hyroko)