Imani textlog

Imani Rathens So Inavy, do you want to tell me what happened?
Inavy Purple-Green Says, "I felt too much love."
Imani Rathens Inavy I just saw Heather storm out of here and then you DMed me. So do you want to tell me the full story?
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I met with Zvonimir again. I felt too much for him on that time, same love as Heather and Nori. I said out loud that I loved him. I told this to Heather. I cheated on Heather and Nori."
Imani Rathens Well how do you define cheating in this situation? And is that not what you said to me?
Imani Rathens And Inavy I have something to say abou tit, and it is rather critical but try not to take it too hard
Inavy Purple-Green says, "Go on."
Imani Rathens inavy you throw around and change the word love like it is nothing.
Imani Rathens You are the only person I have said I love you to here, and even then I only sadi that after a lot of uncertainty and din't want to say anything until I was absolutely sure how I felt
Imani Rathens And inavy that's not going to be something I can undo, it is as you called it eternal unconditional love. I might get mad, or sad, or angry at you but nothing could ever make me stop loving you
Imani Rathens You on the other hand said you loved me. Then you saiid you no longer love me and now love heather. She's speciual and it's just her, she's a deity. Then it was Heather and Nori. Then it was Heather and Nori and kinda me, then it was Heather and Nori and  Zvonimir and Me
Imani Rathens When you change who you love every day of the week, and sjay I love you to somebody you have not even mentioned to me before today it cheapens it
Imani Rathens Like how it cheapens it when you spoke of nori like she was your friend and heathers firlfried and definitely below me., And the next day ou loved her
Imani Rathens When you are inconsistent and change your loves on a whim they fail to hold meaning. And it hurts everyone you use that term with
Imani Rathens That's what I had to say Inavy
Inavy Purple-Green says, "im a terrible, terrible messed up synthetic."
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I have no idea what love is I think..."
Imani Rathens Looks at  her feeling bad that he has finally uttered those words, even though they have been brewing in him a long time. And even worse at how cxcelarly they have hurt her. He sighs deeply reaching over and gently grabbing her hand, squeezing softly. Giving her  empathetic look not wanting to cut her off this time
Inavy Purple-Green says, "Heather hates me, Nori will hate me as well, and all I wanted was to make people happy, they both above all else"
Imani Rathens Inavy, if Nori loved you she isn't going to hate you no matter what you do.
Inavy Purple-Green Says, "But I know understand, that this pain is something I can feel, and I feel it on Heather."
Inavy Purple-Green Says, "I cheated, Imani."
mani Rathens Inavy you did terrible things to me too. You said I was an abusive fucker and that you hated me. But even in my lowest mometns did I say I hate you Inavy?
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I broke what I wanted to keep intact"
Inavy Purple-Green says, "... As impressive I still find it, no, you never did."
Imani Rathens And I never felt it either. Because that's what unconditional love means. No matter what the other person does you are still there for them
Imani Rathens And If Heather and Nori truly love you they will feel the same way
Inavy Purple-Green says, "Would you forgive me for cheating?, I said to Zvonimir that I loved him, and later I told that to Heather, and how he made feel, that he reminded me of Heather and Nori!, I... I just felt the same love, I felt the same caring, I didn't wanted to cheat!, I... I-I messed up..."
Imani Rathens Inavy I would forgive you pretty much no matter what you did. And I have
Inavy Purple-Green says, "Heather won't, Nori won't, I feel like I lost the perfect love..."
Imani Rathens Inavy if tehy truly love you they will forgive you. And if you love them you will have faith in that
You feel sluggish.
Imani Rathens Inavy even after everything you did to me I forgave you right?
Imani Rathens asks, "Why do you think they won't?"
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I think I'm indeed a failure after all, really... I... I still love Hether and Nori, and with Heather not loving me, Nori in future not lovign me... I know that... I'm not certain..."
Imani Rathens Inavy listen to me. Don't just speak as if Nori would just abandon you like that. She doesn't deserve that from you
Inavy Purple-Green says, "Getting to Nori will be hard, to Heather will be even harder, Both I love, but both will distrust me."
Imani Rathens Inavy what did you promise to Heather and Nori?
Inavy Purple-Green says, "My eternal love, that I would be with them and never let them down. I failed... Like my vows."
Imani Rathens Did you stop loving them? Were you not there when they needed you?
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I still love them. But I did hurt Heather in a way I never wanted to... Nori will learn as well, may it be by Heather or me. If necessary I will tell her what I did, so she may understand the mess I am, I will say sorry, that I feel bad for letting both down like that, I doubt they will accept it... But I will do one way or another..."
Imani Rathens Inavy I just have to ask, what are you telling them about me?? Because it sound s to me as if you made two admissions of love in one day. Which in a sense hurts me as you keep calling me special and then saying well, you're were below 1 and then 2, and now 3. BUt you act as if you are cheating on them with him, and not with me. As if what you said to me was somehow insincere.
Inavy Purple-Green says, "...I don't know how love really is... I feel it, but I still can't be sure what's the difference from those loves... I just don't know, I can't put people on numbers, I can't put them on pedestals, I just wish I could simply... Stop existing. I just bring more pain to people in relationhips than love and care. I mess so much, I made things to terrible, I just... I just don't know how I can change that..."
Imani Rathens Inavy, by doing what I did. Honesty and doing everything you can to talk to them and spend time with them. Hmm, how do I put it? What would you do if you found out Nori cheated on you?
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I... I would forgive her. I would just hug her, kiss her and forgive her... I love her so much, so so much... That I would gladly be at her side, to hug her... I... I would do the same for Heather... I love them... I want them both happy."
Inavy Purple-Green says, "But I'm not Nori!, I'm not Heather!, They think different!, they act different!... I'm scared Imani, I'm scared of what I did, I can lose everything..."
Imani Rathens Then Inavy have faith in them when they say that they love you. Because if you can sau y you love someone, and then take that back a week later you didn't love them in the first place. If Nori loves you she will forgive you and you should be open with her
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I'm sure, that the love I feel for them both... Is strong. Really really strong. But I'm still afraid that my heart will shatter if they just say "no" to me..."
Imani Rathens Inavy how do you think they feel about you?
Inavy Purple-Green says, "Heather hates me for sure... Nori... She will  get so sad because of me..."
Imani Rathens Why do you think Heather hates you?
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I just feel it... Even if she didn't said it or showed it, it's... A feeling..."
Imani Rathens Inavy it's really hard for me to give you very unbiarsed advice about Heather because I hate her with every bit of my essence. But if she really loves you then you are wrong about that. And if you are rright she never loved you in the first place
Inavy Purple-Green says, "... I think I have a chance, a thin chance... But it won't be the same... I have a fear that they will break my heart slowly, and I do the same to them too..."
Imani Rathens Inavy... Things worked out okay for us right? And what you did to me was far worse than "cheating". And did you see how desperately I tried to save our friends hip. And how afraid I waws of losing you., That's because I love you. And you have to have faith they will do they same
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I'm so scared of losing their love... But I have to try... That's the only thing left for mme to do..."
Imani Rathens I know Inavy. And you know no matter what that I am going to love you and be there for you. Please don't hurt yourself or do something crazy
Inavy Purple-Green says, "Taking my emotions away would be crazy?"
Imani Rathens Yes Inavy. And it would hurt me tremendouly to see that.
Inavy Purple-Green says, "...I won't do then..."
Inavy Purple-Green says, "Zvonimir is a nice guy... I just wish that I knew better before saying those things..."
Imani Rathens Sighs, stepping forward. "Come here Inavy. PLease try to feel a bit better." HE says his voice almost pleasing as he pulls her into a tight hug.  His eyes red and puffy contianing an deep internal sadness. Partly of empathy for what she is going through. And partly for for who dismissive she is acting of their own elationship. But he swallows his thoughts insted just hugging her tighter as he buries his head into her shoulder
Inavy Purple-Green accepts the hug, still with her arms down, without moving an inch of her body, not even the tail, Inavy truly is frozen on place, even her warmth seem to have diminished, as if she was truly cold now, even more than room temperature, she feels the hug, and with a deep voice, she says, "I wish I could cry, Imani. I would cry so much to just... Feel better... Thank you..."
Imani Rathens "Inavy you can always talk to me. I love you so much and I hope you can get through this" He says not letting her go as he feels her slightly cold body press against his. "Just have faith in the people you love"
Inavy Purple-Green says, "Tell me... Is it right that I say I love you, Imani?... How you feel about it?..."
Imani Rathens "Inavy I really don't know. I don't know what you mean when you say it. I don't know what it means that you still say it despite saying that just caused so much of a strain between you and Nori and HEater.  You're a mess, I'm a mess, this is a mess. All I know is I want you to be happy, and I want you to be well, adn I want you to care about me and spend time with me"
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I can't go around spreading that I love people... So I know for sure that... I can't love anyone but Heather and Nori, and the word "love" is for them only, right?"
Imani Rathens Well Inavy I love you, I want you ro love me. But I think you are gonna have to answer that question for yourself.
Inavy Purple-Green sighs and says, "For Heather and Nori, I will say that I don't love you, neither Zvonimir... I know this hurts... But I sitll like you Imani, as my roboticist, you understand?... I'm sorry, but if I have to fix it with Heather and Nori, I have to start from the begining of my personality and view points..."
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I have to use the word "Love" properly now..."
Imani Rathens Inavy if you don't love me because you don't love me I can accept that. BUt if you don't love me because you are afraid of what they will say I really can't. Inavy you said you had eternal love for me,. Then you said you would loose if but try to feel taht way for me again. Then yous aid you love me again as if nothing has ever happeend. And now you say you don't.
Imani Rathens And Inavy every single time you go back and hforth you are hurting me. And playing with my heart like a cat on a string
Inavy Purple-Green says, "This mess of love words really is a big problem, that even you feel on skin... I would die for you Imani, I would gladly talk with you, I would even go further beyond for you, but I cannot say anymore that I love you... I have to fix it for sure now. I can't throw the word "love" around like a ball... I like you Imani, a lot, but it's not love that I feel with Heather and Nori..."
Imani Rathens And I  wish you wouldn't have told me that it was. Or that we could have sex like nothing ever happened. It's just sad Inavy. It's so very sad to lose you
Inavy Purple-Green says, "You did lose the love of me, but I'm still me, and I'm still with you as friends, like before, like all it started, I like you Imani, I like and respect you!, but the love I feel is for Heather and Nori now..."
Inavy Purple-Green says, "I say this, so I won't hurt your heart anymore, you understand?"