kled memories timeline

i don't know how exactly it started, but it began in bandle city.

i didn't stay there long. never much cared for it. i was too rowdy. not one for pranks, moreso tracking down the people who pranked me and giving them an ass whooping that was foreign to what yordlekind knew.

i wanted to get gone. the city wanted me to get gone. so, i got gone.

and goddamn, was the rest of the world awful. it was a constant warzone, powerful magics tearing through the landscape and the lives of innocents. i found myself drawn to the people who took up arms- at first the ones who wanted to protect their towns, but then the ones who wanted to destroy those magical weapons of destruction. or take them for themselves.

i think i met ryze at some point. probably multiple times.

not that i was even that interested in those magical things. it had always been about the glory. about kicking ass against all odds and coming out a little more prideful at the end of it. that was the greatest treasure i could ever take.

eventually, i found myself joining the hundreds that were going to challenge mordekaiser. this was after he had become a shade. i remember cutting down plenty of his enslaved spectres with nothing more than my longaxe, rusted as it was, and my unlimited supply of fury. and they said my weapons needed to be silvered!

eventually i found myself staring up at the iron revenant himself. he seemed impressed. that he'd seen few yordles, and none worth enslaving. until me.

i spit on his shitty armor in response and got slicin'.

it was a good fight. i got some decent licks in, but through his armor and his necromancy i couldn't do too much. but still, i dodged his mace and left wounds were i could. until he smashed my weapon. not like i was going to let it stop me- i lunged for his stupid face with the jagged remains of my axe, but got batted out of the air before i could even get a paltry hit in.

one of the spikes took my fuckin' eye out, and the rest of me wasn't much better off. i was still breathing, but he was creeping towards me. thankfully, reinforcements came in to distract him before i could wind up another one of his minions.

i scurried off to lick my wounds. wasn't gonna be much good in a fight. but that day changed me. started to wake up the recklessness inside me. it was the last time i was ever cautious.

flash forward... quite a few years. noxus was a budding empire, trying to gain as much glory as possible. land and exotic treasures were also appreciated, so i found myself in shurima. i don't know how it went, but i know it ended with me holding my guts in and dragging my mostly broken body through the shuriman sands, searching for water.

but before i found it, i found her. skaarl.

the fuckin' thing would NOT go away. probably thought i was gonna be food soon. but, unwittingly, she saved my life. for the first time of many.

her footprints in the sand led me back to her nest, where she got her water. somehow it was completely uninhabited, which i reckoned was how she had gone undiscovered. i drank from the oasis, then patched myself up.

washed the wounds up. bound them with some of the plants growing near the water. and the damn drakolops STILL wouldn't go away. i dunno what it was. magical critters stick together, i guess.

after that i became... well, who i was. i remember my shotgun came from bilgewater, but that's where the memories run dry.