Feels Like the First Time [Non-H]

“Hisao, we’re gonna miss the moooviiieee!!”

I look up from the book in my hand, turning my head toward the source of the whining. It’s Hideaki, face scrunched up in a pout/stern look at the end of the aisle. He’s dressed up today, more than normal, short shorts traded out for a navy blue skirt, white knee highs, and white blouse with a pair of black flats to complete the outfit. He’s changed even more since that night, going from androgynous to pretty much full female. His hair is longer now, almost down to his shoulders, and a recent trip to a stylist makes it look surprisingly good on him. Of course he kept that little twinge of hair, and the hairclips that pin one side behind his ear.

Like I said, a little dressed up, but it is our first date after all.

We’ve technically been together over a month, but… it’s been difficult.

Shizune caught us that morning, basically pulling Hideaki out of my bed and signing so fast that I couldn’t keep up. Hideaki did though, never told me exactly what she (or he) said, but calmed her down enough that he could slip me his number before she dragged him off. We communicated for a while in text and email after that, Shizune not letting us interact in person, basically trying to sever ties between us.

I can’t blame her really; I did fuck her little brother, despite it being his decision.

Well, after two weeks of being quarantined, Hideaki finally managed to talk Shizune into letting us hang out together… the three of us.

Imagine the most awkward situation you’ve been through, and then double it.

That’s what it was like.

Again, I totally understand why, but she took it a bit too far. It got to the point where she’d stand in-between us, and even to where if we got looks she’d hold my hand and act a bit lovey dovey.

That’s when it got ugly.

We were in the middle of a park when Hideaki snapped, signing faster than a machine gun, startling Shizune with how angry he was. Again, I couldn’t keep up, just watching as they argued via hands until Hideaki balled his fists and glared at his sister.

“He’s MY boyfriend! You had your chance, and YOU left HIM!”

I’ve known Shizune for a while now, and if there’s one defining quality she has it’s that she’s one of the strongest people I know.

But that broke her.

She gave me this look, the saddest look I’ve ever seen, and just started crying. We eventually managed to calm her down, and she apologized to Hideaki for her actions, and after a very quiet car ride home I got to have an even more awkward experience.

Jigoro catching myself and Hideaki kissing.

It was at that moment I thought my life was over. All I saw in my mind was a flash of steel and spray of bright red blood, but I was horrified/relieved when Jigoro started laughing, and then he patted me on the back with one meaty palm. Apparently he never expected Hideaki to be manly, and wasn’t surprised with his homosexuality in the least. Also I think he was just happy that Shizune and I weren’t dating.

Things got a lot better after those debacles, our only bar for dating being my schooling, and the minimum wage job I kept for spending money. Thankfully though, I managed to wrangle a weekend off, and treating Hideaki to a movie. Before that we wandered around the mall the theater is attached to, the entire thing was done up in a mixture of 80’s American and current Japanese style. It’s this weird clash of neon, bright colors, and technology that Hideaki completely adores.

The bookstore was our last stop, and until now I was looking at this biography of a French philosopher. Dude was a mathematician and writer as well, but the most interesting part of the book was the cover. It was this painting of the man staring directly at whoever picked it up.

It felt… weird.

Like, he was compelling me to do something, bending the fabric of time in order to deliver a message.

A message… to give someone th-

“Onii-chan… we’re gonna be late…”

Oh you fucking brat.

Hideaki giggles as he rushed off around the corner, knowing that calling me by that fucking name would get me immediately. I chase him around, eventually catching and pulling him into a kiss. A kiss that quickly progresses into us making out in that aisle, Hideaki wrapping his arms around my neck as I place my own on his hips. I almost forget that we’re going to be late when Hideaki’s phone beeps loudly and he breaks off.

“C’moooooon~!” he whines, pulling me out of the store.

I follow him out into the crowd, keeping an even pace with him as he gazes around. Every once in a while though his hand bumps mine, accidental I think until about the tenth time and I realize something.

He wants to hold hands.

Well… I’m an idiot I guess.

I quickly grab his hand, noting how he immediately seems to get happier, and I get this slight feeling of accomplishment at getting something right on the first date.

We reach the theater in record time, and grab some concessions before grabbing a seat perfectly level with the center of the screen, getting comfortable right before the previews begin to show. The movie we’re here to see is a typical monster movie; trailer for it was about some kids pissing off a swamp creature, pretty generic really. I’m honestly surprised that Hideaki wanted to see it, and it isn’t until the first monster kill that I figure out why he picked this one.

“Wah!” he exclaims as some random girl gets mauled, wrapping his arms around mine in a bear hug.

Realizing what he wants, I pull my arm free and lift up the armrest, allowing him to scoot a bit closer as I drape my arm over him. He cuddles up close to me, burying his face in my chest each time something scary happens.

I can’t lie, him being this close feels really good, and I feel like I’m on top of the world each time he cringes in fear.

The next time he cringes I chuckle a little as I run my hand through his hair, leaning down to plant a kiss on his forehead. He looks up at me with a sheepish smile, and I can’t help but kiss him again, quickly pecking his lips with the intention to return to watching the movie.

But one kiss turns into another, which turns into another… and another.

Before I know it we turn into that couple, the ones who spend most of the movie making out instead of actually watching the film, and the movie is almost over when we finally break off. Blushing slightly, I pull him a bit closer as we watch the last little bit of the climax, and we end up being the last couple out of the theater.

The bus ride home is quiet, most of it spent with my arm around Hideaki, and one of his iPod headphones in my ear. He listens to mostly J-Pop, stuff like Vocaloid and Kyary Pamyu Pamyu, but surprisingly tonight he’s listening to old teenage romance shit. Some song about swinging and moonlight that I can barely stand until I notice that he’s fallen asleep on my chest, this look of contentment displayed on his face as his chest slowly rises and falls.

I let him sleep until our stop, gently shaking him awake and getting off the bus with him.

“Hisaooo… I’m tiiiiirrrreeeddd…” he quietly grumbles, rubbing one eye with his hand.

I turn back toward him, this… really stupid idea crossing my mind.

“Hisao what’re you doing?” he asks as I drop to one knee.

“I’m giving you a piggy back ride home, c’mon,” I reply.

“B-But your heart… you could have an attack,” he argues.

“Shush, you’re like 130 pounds soaking wet, now get over here,”

He doesn’t reply, silently climbing on my back and wrapping his arms around my neck as I stand up. He’s really not heavy at all, and I feel like I could run the rest of the way back to his house, but I settle for walking slowly to drag out the inevitable end of the night. As I walk Hideaki manages to fall asleep on me again, using my shoulder as a pillow forcing me to pay attention and make sure he doesn’t fall off.

Eventually we reach Jigoro’s house, and I wake Hideaki up again as we reach the door.

“C’mon, time to go to bed,” I shrug my shoulders to jostle him.

“Nnnn, don’twanna,” he grumbles, tightening his hold on me.

“You gotta go to bed Hideaki, you have school tomorrow,” I let go of his legs, making him yelp as he’s forced to balance himself.

“M-Meanie,” he says with a pout, crossing his arms.

“Yea yea, but you have school, and I have work. So… I guess this is goodnight…” I drag out the last bit, unsure of what to say next.

Fortunately nothing needs said as Hideaki jumps on me, pulling me into another kiss, and again my hands wrap around his waist as I return the kiss with equal fervor.

I want him, I want to take him the same way as that night he came into my room, and honestly I probably could. Jigoro isn’t even home right now, off at some bar with a friend, and Shizune is at university all the time.

God do I want to take him inside right now… but I can’t.

It’s our first date, it doesn’t matter whether we’ve done it before or not, I intend to start this… relationship off right.

I break away from him, giving him a hug before he goes inside, and turns to smile at me as he closes the door.

Tonight was a good night.

(For those interested, this is the song for Line 77 onwards that Hideaki was listening to: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YcNzHOBmk8)