merp

if (thisditto.width() < $(window).width()/8) {
  thisditto.width(thisditto.width()*1.4);
  thisditto.height(thisditto.height()*1.4);
  thisditto.css({ opacity: 1.00 });
  //animate this with queue:false
  //add opacity
}else if (thisditto.width() < $(window).width()/4) {
  thisditto.width(thisditto.width()*1.3);
  thisditto.height(thisditto.height()*1.3);
  thisditto.css({ opacity: 0.75 });
  //animate this with queue:false
  //add opacity
}else if (thisditto.width() < $(window).width()/2){ // slow down, barely
  thisditto.width(thisditto.width()*1.1);
  thisditto.height(thisditto.height()*1.1);
  thisditto.css({ opacity: 0.50 });
}else if (thisditto.width() < $(window).width()){ // slow down, barely OMG SO SLOW
  thisditto.width(thisditto.width()*1.01);
  thisditto.height(thisditto.height()*1.01);
  thisditto.css({ opacity: 0.25 });
}else if (thisditto.width() < $(window).width()*2){ // slow down, barely OMG SO SLOW e.e
  thisditto.width(thisditto.width()*1.001);
  thisditto.height(thisditto.height()*1.001);
  thisditto.css({ opacity: 0.15 });
}else{ // Its gotten to 2x browser window resolution so kill it
  thisditto.parent().remove();
  ditto--;
  kongakongakonga();
  if ((Math.floor(Math.random() * 3)) < 1) {kongakongakonga();}
}