Jump 420: The Evil Dead

Jump #420: The Evil Dead
>The Star: Body and mind and converging towards the light at the end of a dark time.
>Age: 25
>Location: The Shack
"Ow. Please take the axe out of my chest?"
>Identity: Drop-In
>I Know Your Damn Words, Alright? (Free, Drop-In)
Actually... being able to make sure I don't forget any important steps is rather amusing, considering how I can literally get a step-by-step guide on how to achieve virtually anything. Thanks, PtV!
>It's A Trick. Get An Axe. (900, Drop-In)
Even if they weren't dead, if you take something apart at the joints, it can't do anything. So.
>This Is My Boomstick! (700, Drop-In)
What's this? My technology is impressive, and I can help them adapt to its use quickly? Why, that sounds downright useful.
>Hero From The Sky (400, Drop-In)
An obscure prophecy about me, anywhere that I choose to have an obscure prophecy. I can work with that.
In fact, if we get a Methods of Rationality jump, I'm going to make sure the prophecy says that my purpose is to smack Harry James Potter-Evans-Verres upside his head whenever he ignores what doesn't fit neatly in his box.
>Groovy. (300)
Groovy.
>Hail To The King, Baby. (100)
What do you mean, in my own way? I AM the king.
>Oldsmobile (0)
So, a '73 Delta 88? I can work with that. Especially since it keeps any modifications I make to it. That in itself makes this worth its weight in gold.

So, a cabin in the woods! That's a great place to go hang out and WHY ARE YOU PLAYING THAT RECORDING-

Right. Well.

Deadites, I'm not a fan of them, they're not a fan of holy magic, but we came to an accord. They like to play fast and loose with time as opposed to going linear. I'm fine with that. What I'm not fine with is them playing with peoples' souls, and... well. That offends me on a very deep level, so basically while everyone INSIDE the cabin is getting fucked over, I'm OUTSIDE the cabin actively purging threats, not that this keeps everyone else from eventually ending up in trouble.

In short, those two days at the cabin turns out about as it normally did, with the exception of me being present, and me being yanked through the portal as well. And being back in the 1300's is no picnic. Ash is center stage and I'm apparently along for the ride, though there was a prophecy about me as well. This is all well and good, though. My part in this? Replacing everyone's swords and armor with slightly more advanced stuff, leaving scrolls documenting techniques for producing such material. Basically... they got better steel.

Also, I did the usual thing and gave everyone magic, which basically made the deadites scream about things being unfair before light and holy spells proceeded to make their undead lives miserable.

Ash still took center stage, mind you. He was the heart and soul of everyone's movement to exterminate the undead, even if I pulled a Voldemort and gave him a replacement hand that was made of silver. And blessed. Quite a bit more durable than the clockwork hand, though he could still very much wear the chainsaw.

Also, after that incident with the Necronomicons... I gave Ash "I Know Your Damn Words" perk to him, along with a general brain-boost, just to make sure he'd wake up where he was supposed to rather than at the close of the age of mankind.