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Of Marshmallows and Men (WiP)

Jan 4th, 2013
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  1. >Night Rob Stewart Was On To Something on Earth
  2. >Be Rarity
  3. >Anon's apartment is dreadfully boring
  4. R: Anon, this is simply awful
  5. >Paw at your mane and roll on Anon's bed
  6. R: You said you would work on a way to get me back to Equestria days ago
  7. A: I am working as hard as I can
  8. >You hang your beautiful mane over the edge of the bed and pout
  9. R: I miss my friends, and Sweetie Belle, and my sewing machine... oh, and my little kitty, Opal. The poor dear's probably worried sick about her mommy
  10. >You cross your magnificent hooves over your heart
  11. A: Well, I am sorry about your family and friends, I can't work any faster on getting you back to them. I did, however, find this in my travels today and thought you might like it
  12. >You lift your head up to see what Anon brought you
  13. R: Oh, Anon, a present for moi~?
  14. >Anon presents to you a large, grey sewing machine
  15. >The shiny red letters read "S-I-N-G-E-R" across the top of the machine
  16. >You gasp and hop to your hooves
  17. R: Anon, you shouldn't have, oh, but you should, how love~ly!
  18. >Your voice skips about as you express your excitement
  19. >You suddenly realize how much more you are missing home right now as your hooves trace the finely made body of the sewing machine
  20. R: A dress would probably make me feel better and I can make a matching hat. Oh, and I could tidy up your suit, Anon. No offense, but, they are becoming rather rough from your repeated use of them
  21. >Anon beams at you
  22. A: Well, actually, I have a very intimate problem, if you could take care of it for me?
  23. >You ears perk up at the word "intimate" and you listen in for such juicy details
  24. A: Well, hah, you see, I kind of snagged my face on a low-hanging nail a few days back. I was wondering if you could just fix that little hole
  25. R: You, Anonymous, want me, little ol' Rarity from Ponyville, to fix your most precious treasure?
  26. A: Well, yeah, i-if you wouldn't...
  27. >You cut him off with great pleasure in your voice
  28. R: Why, of course, I would be honored to help you. After all, it was you who let me live here and feed me and give me such exquisitely soft blankets and excellent 1000 thread-counted sheets. I simply could -not- stand uncounted threads to sleep on
  29. >You cast your left hoof over your forehead
  30. R: I will only try to bring your mask back to its former glory so that you may proudly resume being, well, you!
  31. >Anon smiles and thanks you
  32. >You think to yourself that you've never seen Anon without his "face" on before
  33. >While it is only prudent for a lady to always "have her face on", it was much more a part of Anon than simply make-up and masks
  34. A: So... uh, well, here you go
  35. >Anon reached his hands into the collar of his suit and loosened his tie
  36. >You watched with bated breath as the tie hung slack on his neck and his white collar was turned up
  37. >His strong, human fingers crept expertly into the collar and caught the edge of where the mask laid on his neck
  38. >You moved slightly closer and basked in this overpowering sensation of utter exposure
  39. >The mask slid up a strong, clean neck line
  40. >It lifted up more and more, revealing a smooth, pointed chin and soft, full lips
  41. >You began to shake with anticipation as his small, human nose was revealed next
  42. >And here you were at the threshold of Anon's helplessness
  43. >The mask fully lifted from his head for the first time in years that you had known him
  44. >You saw his well kept, if self-administered, mane and his smooth eyebrows that perfectly lined his eyes
  45. >And in a moment, you stood captivated by his soft, understanding eyes
  46. R: A-Anon, y-your eyes!
  47. >Those eyes held deep, meaningful wisdom and tender, warm conversation the likes of which no stallion had ever compared
  48. >Anon blinked as if in slow motion, his eyelashes neatly meeting and parting
  49. A: Oh, is there something in my eye?
  50. >You voice was detained in the pit of your throat and barely a squeak parted your lips
  51. >Even his voice was different
  52. >Not cold and unyielding as it sounded coming through the mask, but the voice of a friend you'd never known
  53. A: Charity, are you OK?
  54. >Your heart thud so fiercely in your chest that you were concerned he might hear
  55. >You could feel a bead of sweat well at your forelock, just under your horn and it took every ounce of your being to speak
  56. R: N-nothing... y-your eyes are... perfect
  57. A: Oh, well, thanks in advance for helping me with this, I'm going to get back to those books and see if we can't get you home soon
  58. >A thought sparked inside your head of "home" and you thought of your next move carefully
  59. R: Anon, now please, you've been working much too hard for me. I should do something for you in return
  60. A: Fixing my face would be perfect for me. Didn't you say you missed your friends and family so dearly
  61. >You did! Curse you, line 9!
  62. R: I am sure they miss me, however, they are adults and I am sure they would understand such circumstances
  63. A: Alright... if you say so
  64. >Anon walks over into the kitchen and leaves you with your new sewing machine, threads, a variety of fabrics and his "face"
  65. >You stare at the green, smooth mask in your hoof
  66. >This beastly mask hides the face of the most beautiful creature you've ever seen
  67. >You stare for a while at the mask, the image of Anon's eyes burning a picture in your brain
  68. >You whisper to yourself aloud
  69. R: Those eyes, like refined diamonds, why does he hide himself from both our worlds?
  70. >Today has raised more questions than you'd ever like to think of
  71. >You set up a work station and press the hoof pedal for the first time
  72. >The machine springs to life as it feeds the thread into a knot
  73. >You stare intently at the mask again while picturing Anon's face
  74. >You thoughts race about you
  75. R: Oh woe is me. If I complete this mask, this -prison-, Anon will be happy and hidden once more. But, if I don't, I could look upon those beautiful eyes again and they would be filled with sadness. What ever shall I do?
  76. >Anon returns with two cups in his hand and a small, neatly prepared bowl of some delicious smelling food
  77. A: Ah, good, you're still here
  78. >You look up at him quizzically
  79. R: Where would I have gone?
  80. >You try to catch his eyes again, but he seems to be doing his best to hide his face from you
  81. A: Oh, I don't know... it was just really quiet. Not like you, at least, for the last few days
  82. R: I am sorry if I had been that much of a nuisance
  83. >You know Anon's words ring with a lot of truth
  84. A: Oh, no, I didn't mean it like that, I... I just, you know? Do you like the Singer?
  85. >Anon seemed to speak with much less enthusiasm and force without his mask
  86. R: Yes, it feels so right between my hooves. I belong behind a desk, creating beautiful things
  87. A: Good, I am glad you like it
  88. >You try to turn your neck and catch another glimpse of Anon's face, but he obscures it with the shadows of the apartment
  89. >The only light, other than your work bench, is coming from the full moon shining through the window
  90. R: Anon, I've been having a few concerns with your mask
  91. >A devious, malicious and downright, unlady-like thought enters your mind
  92. R: Surely, you do not mind -me-, Rarity, around while you are not wearing the mask?
  93. >You approach closer and closer, the wicked thoughts in your head battle each other for dominance
  94. R: Before I finish it, could you... could you let me see your face again?
  95. >Anon doesn't stir from his shroud
  96. >You are at his knees now
  97. >You place your hooves on either side of his legs and pull yourself up a bit
  98. R: It will be done before you wake in the morning, I promise as an artist~. I-I would just adore seeing your -real- face again. After all, are we not the best of friends?
  99. >Your horn begins to light up with magic as you attempt to illuminate Anon
  100. >He grabs your horn with one swift motion and blocks most of the light
  101. A: I can't let you do that, Marshmallow
  102. >You blast another ray of light
  103. >It hits the ceiling before vanishing
  104. A: What's gotten into you, Charity?
  105. R: A lady has needs to fulfill!
  106. >You can't believe you said that!
  107. >What has become of the lady Rarity who is now bearing down on her only friend in this world?
  108. >You get a hold of yourself and your magic fades
  109. >Tears form in your large, blue eyes as you sink into Anon's lap
  110. R: Oh, forgive me, Anon, I never meant to go this far. I just couldn't help myself! Your eyes are like the most magnificent gems I've ever seen~!
  111. A: Y-you think my eyes are nice?
  112. R: Nice?! More like flawless diamonds
  113. A: Gee, I don't know what to say... sorry for the rough treatment to your horn
  114. >Anon loosens his grip on your horn and with a strong, soft gesture, he caress it from your mane-line to the tip
  115. >Your back legs fall out from underneath you and your head buries itself in his lap
  116. R: A-A-non~! Oh, not t-t-there!
  117. A: Oh my! I suppose that would be sensitive, haha, sor...
  118. >You can't take this anymore
  119. >You demand satisfaction after this emotional roller-coaster
  120. R: Ah-ah-again, please~
  121. >Anon's hand is still for a moment
  122. >You feel that after all the cruel things you have done so far, this may just end your friendship
  123. >You sit there, ready to be banished or exiled, or whatever it is humans do to ex-friends
  124. >Anon takes a deep breath in and slowly lets it out
  125. >Your stomach is so full of butterflies at this very moment that you almost wish you had a mask to hide behind
  126. >Before another morbid thought can cross your mind, Anon strokes your horn again
  127. R: Ah-ah-oh, oh, yes~!
  128. A: Heh, this is excellent, also explains why TwiBright threw me out that day... yeah, that was confusing me for a while
  129. R: D-don't stop, I need this
  130. >Anon chuckles and strokes you with swift, deliberate motions
  131. >You all but melt in his expert hands
  132. >You moan in every-way-but ladylike as Anon picks up the pace
  133. >With a few steady thrusts, you lose control and your special kind of "magic" is released in a powerful blast
  134. >Anon is engulfed by the bright light as you lay in his lap
  135. >Drool hangs from your muzzle and your whole body aches from the strained position
  136. R: Ohh~, Anon, that was wonderful
  137. >Anon runs a finger along your muzzle and traces your lips
  138. A: Y-you too
  139. >You look back to Anon's suit jacket
  140. >Your loss of control has reformed his coat into a jet black, double-breasted coat with gold buttons and form-fitting shoulders that naturally contour to Anon's own frame
  141. >By Celestia, you must have been pent up!
  142. A: This jacket is kind of nice... I wonder how it'd look with my face on?
  143. >Anon turns your head to face him
  144. >His icy hands soothe your hot face
  145. >You see him stare into your tired eyes
  146. >Those beautiful features of his fill your mind as he speaks nonsense to you
  147. >Before you realize, you're being carried to your bed
  148. >Anon hummed the 'Sleep Song' as he placed your delicate body down
  149. A: Goodnight, SquigglyTail, see ya in the AM
  150. R: You would make *yawn* a perfect prince...
  151. >Zzz
  152.  
  153. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
  154.  
  155. >Day We Fancy Now on Earth
  156. >Be Rarity
  157. >Zzz
  158.  
  159. >Be Anon
  160. >You sit up from the couch that you had been sleeping on
  161. >The sun is glorious this morning
  162. >You look at your clothes in the light and marvel at how clean you look
  163. >You tip-toe around your home and peak in on your guest in your room
  164. >Rarity is sleeping like a lamb
  165. >Or pony
  166. >No, maybe just like a lamb... lambs have hooves, yeah, it all makes sense
  167. >You leave the door slightly open and decide to make breakfast
  168. >It is the most important meal of the day
  169.  
  170. >Be Rarity
  171. >You are dreaming of a wonderful castle
  172. >You are laying on a bed made of cloud and the door to your chambers opens
  173. >In steps a beautiful stallion
  174. >His mane is midnight black and his piercing eyes hold your attention
  175. R: Oh, Prince Anonymous of Earthia... what a pleasant surprise to see you in my bed chambers
  176. >You smile seductively and spread your body out across your bed
  177. R: What can -I- help you with on such a fortuitous evening?
  178. >You place a single grape between your teeth and hold it elegantly
  179. A: Faire Princess, I come on behalf of the kingdom of Yonkers to ask for your lovely hoof in holy matrimony
  180. >You gasp, more for effect than out of true surprise
  181. R: Why, Anonymous, darling, what a sudden and unexpected offer. I know I am the fairest in all these lands and that my considerable territory is renowned for its resource, but surely, you would want something else of me?
  182. >The stud of a stallion approaches you
  183. >His eyes nearly pin you with his presence
  184. A: My lady, I assure you all worldly possession are for naught in my eyes for I have fallen deeply and hopelessly in love with you. To have you rule at my side for all of time is my only desire
  185. >You stifle a giggle
  186. >Anon is so romantic and charming!
  187. >You lay your right hoof over the bed and place your other hoof across your brow
  188. R: Prince Anonymous, if you would take my hoof in marriage, I would...
  189. >You stop as you are overcome by the smell of food
  190. >It seems to be coming from no where nearby
  191. R: Ahem... as I was saying, if you would have me as your queen, I will...
  192. >The smell of flesh burning causes you to stir
  193. >You sit up in your cloud-bed and sniff the air
  194. R: Uh, kind Prince... do you smell something burning?
  195. >Anon looks to you and bares his teeth
  196. >You see a mouth full of impossibly sharp canines gleam at you
  197. R: A-Anon... Anonymous?
  198. >He brings his hoof down twice
  199. >Anon charges at you
  200. >You scream and clutch your hooves to your chest
  201.  
  202. >Be Anon
  203. >Making bacon because your stomach ain't faking about aching for some bacon
  204. >You try to sing this in your head a few times
  205. >You are bad at creating melodies
  206. >The silence is disrupted by a scream from your bedroom
  207. >You dash in quickly
  208. A: What's going on?!
  209. >You see Rarity clutching a pillow and visibly shaking
  210. >Shaking... bacon... making
  211. >Cut that out!
  212.  
  213. >Be Rarity
  214. >You realize everything that just happened was a nightmare of sorts
  215. >You clutch the pillow between your hooves for a moment before looking to Anon
  216. >Anon is looking at you quizzically from the doorway
  217. A: Yo, Rarity... ya alright?
  218. >You look at him for a moment and blink some sleeping sand out of your eyes
  219. >He doesn't look like a menacing, feral pony
  220. R: Oh, Anon, it's just you... I... I had a bad dream
  221. >You sniff the air
  222. A: Oh, want to talk about?
  223. >You look around the room
  224. R: Is something burning? I swear I smell something burning?
  225. A: I was making breakfast... don't think I burnt anything yet
  226. >You see Anon's sincere eyes
  227. A: Do you like waffles? I made some for you
  228. >Maybe some breakfast will do you justice
  229. >You hop out of bed and meander to the kitchen area
  230. >Anon places a large, well-crafted waffle on a porcelain plate
  231. >He garnishes with a dollop of butter in the center
  232. R: Oh darling, this looks fantastic, but do you have...
  233. >You freeze for a moment
  234. >Anon empties another pan onto his plate of a waffle and three strips of some unfortunate creature
  235. >Your eyes hold wide in astonishment
  236. A: Do I have any what now?
  237. >Anon casually lifts a strip of meat to his mouth and tears a piece with his wicked canines
  238. >You shriek and fall back
  239. A: Marshmallow! Are you OK?
  240. >Anon rushes to your side and extends his hand
  241. >What a gentleman... a monstrous, flesh-eating gentleman
  242. R: Stay back you... you... pony eating brute!
  243. >You scoot backwards and lift yourself up
  244. >Anon looks surprised at you
  245. A: Pony eating? I don't think I've ever eaten a pony before
  246. R: What poor soul did you just devour in your life-taking jaws!
  247. A: I swear I never met them!
  248. R: Oh woe is me! Trapped with a carnivore when my body is so supple and, most likely delicious, from years of exercise and maintenance! I'm too beautiful to be eaten!
  249. A: SquigglyTail... I am not going to eat you...
  250. R: Perhaps -not- today! Perhaps not tomorrow! But, I have seen horrible things, Anon. I have public access television!
  251. >The horror
  252. A: And for that, I am truly sorry. However, I am not trying, nor would I ever try, to eat you
  253. R: I had no idea you ate -meat-
  254. >You sob
  255. R: And I thought you'd make the perfect prince
  256. A: Wha~?
  257. R: Nothing, it's nothing... how could you!?
  258. >Anon ponders for a moment
  259. A: I had no idea this meant so much to you... I really never could eat meat back in Ponyville... because they only served cupcakes and salad. I am sorry if I offended you
  260. >His eyes tell you that he really is sorry
  261. >But, that dangerous mouth is off-putting
  262. R: I should have seen the signs! Those sharp teeth are just like a dragons, though, I was sure you used them for eating gemstones!
  263. A: Certainly not! Diamonds are too rich for my diet
  264. >Anon taps his feet and holds his hands out to his sides for a moment
  265. >You don't understand if this is suppose to be comedy
  266. A: Everyp0ny's a critic
  267. >Anon frowns for a moment
  268. A: I am very sorry though. I guess it didn't really occur to me what you might think of bacon
  269. R: What had this Bacon fellow done to you that made you eat him?
  270. >You listen closely as to avoid the same fate
  271. A: Bacon has only ever been good to me, my dear. Minus the artery clogging cholesterol
  272. >You must have missed a part or two
  273. >Sometimes, it felt like you were talking to Pinkie Pie
  274. R: No, no, I mean... why? Why did you eat this pony?
  275. A: Oh, this bacon is from a pig
  276. >That is... slightly comforting
  277. R: So... you did -not- eat a pony?
  278. A: Never have, never will
  279. >Anon smiles at you
  280. >The realization of his dagger-like fangs makes you see his smile as something to avoid right now
  281. A: Do you... do you still want that waffle?
  282. >You feel a bit sick watching Anon eat meat
  283. R: Perhaps later, darling... I should get to work on your mask. I am way past the deadline I had promised last night
  284. A: Ah, I forgot you still had it!
  285. >Anon seems happy when you present his tattered mask
  286. >For the next hour or so, you go about setting up your workstation and tending to Anon's "face"
  287. >You do a superior job in the details and help spruce the fine layer inside to allow for a more breathable feeling
  288. >Anon reappears at your desk after so long
  289. R: There we are! I am not sure if it is as good as new, but it certainly looks much better
  290. >You pass Anon the mask
  291. A: Oh, oh my...
  292. >Anon rubs his fingers on the material slowly
  293. A: It feels so... so soft
  294. >He quickly covers his face up
  295. >You feel saddened you can no longer see his eyes, but relieved his mouth is hidden again
  296. >Anon's voice takes on its familiar tone of coldness
  297. A: Oh, yes! It's fantastic! I feel whole again!
  298. >Anon cheers and dances in place
  299. A: Charity, this is the most wonderful work I've ever seen. You made my face one hundred times more comfortable!
  300. R: Why, thank you, Anon. It was my pleasure
  301. >Anon is suddenly behind you
  302. >He's seem to regain his old ability to move at unnatural speeds since becoming "whole"
  303. >You feel his cool arms wrap around your waist and lock under your forelegs
  304. >He hugs you tightly and his heart beats against you
  305. >You melt in his presence and bubble mindlessly
  306. >Anon retracts himself
  307. A: Oh, sorry, too much?
  308. >You are still a little concerned about Anon's carnivorous ways
  309. R: It's nothing, darling. I do have a question for you though. Have you found any more information on how to get me back to Equestria?
  310. A: You know, I haven't really. I mean, it's not really something you can even look for and I can't think of how I first got to Equestria myself
  311. >You hang your head
  312. R: Oh well, one should not pout even when one is feeling... completely homesick
  313. A: Come now, Rare, I am sure Twilight will be working hard to get you back. Besides, she'd know how to come here
  314. R: I suppose you are right, Anon. I will simply bide my time for now in your... lovely home
  315. A: You're welcome to anything here. I have satellite television
  316. >You don't know what a "satellite" is, but perhaps it will be better than looking at the four walls
  317. A: I will try to pick up any materials I can for you to make a new dress though
  318. >You smile
  319. R: Thank you. You are a truly dear friend to me
  320. >You lean in and hug Anon
  321. >His cool body feels kind of pleasant
  322. >You look over his shoulder to see the sun setting and a golden light floods the room
  323. >You think of Celestia lifting and lowering the sun
  324. R: Anon... who raises the sun on Earth?
  325. A: Oh, I guess... no one. It just does
  326. R: That is peculiar
  327. A: Oh yes, Earth is very different than Equestria
  328. R: I am yearning to go out and see the sights. I think it is only fair after how well we treated you in Equestria
  329. >You pout your lips and cross your hooves over your chest
  330. A: Of course, but it is very different here. Love and tolerance are just words and ponies don't talk. We'd have to get creative
  331. >You sigh and sit over your desk again
  332. A: I think... if you don't mind the dark... that there's a place I can take you that you'd like
  333. >You smile and keep your hopes up
  334. >Anonymous would never lead you astray
  335. A: OK, give it a few more hours. Tonight, we ride!
  336.  
  337. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
  338.  
  339. >Night Splendid and Dapper on Earth
  340. >Be Rarity
  341. >Anonymous and you sneak from the apartment room
  342. >You are clad in a simple, if not beautiful, cloak you whipped up
  343. >You are truly a fashionista!
  344. >Anon has a brown trench coat on
  345. >You are not entirely sure why he needs a disguise in his world, but to question Anon is to invite confusion
  346. >The two of you do an admirable job of getting past any other humans
  347. >It's quite easy when the rest of the world is sleeping
  348. >Actually stepping outside for the first time in Anon's world is humbling
  349. >The large white buildings touch the sky and the stars seem to spread much wider in the night
  350. >The level of magical technology his world displays is beyond anything you have seen in Canterlot
  351. R: Anon, where are you taking me?
  352. A: I said it was a surprise
  353. R: Well, I do enjoy a surprise every now and again
  354. >You follow Anon closely around his building and you walk across a paved sidewalk
  355. >Small lights flicker aimlessly in reds or greens
  356. >You try and take in as much as you can in this strange land
  357. >The remainder of the trip is easy enough and goes by in minutes
  358. A: We're here... just hang on a moment
  359. >You look at "here" and are still confused
  360. >Anon opens a door slowly and peaks in
  361. >He looks back to you after a minute and waves you to him
  362. >You cross the threshold into the darkness of the room
  363. >Anon follows behind you and the door shuts
  364. >You whisper with a bit of concern
  365. R: Anon, I can't see a thing
  366. >A light suddenly flashes on and you see the room for the first time
  367. >Mannequins! Human in shape, but still
  368. >You notice sewing machines and fabrics and so many various costumes laying around
  369. R: What is this place, Anon?
  370. A: The local theater thingy. This is the "art" room where they store dresses and stuff. It's hardly used these days since so many people moved out
  371. R: Well, it is lovely, though I am not entirely sure what you wanted me to see?
  372. A: I thought you enjoy the uh, the art and sewing paraphernalia
  373. R: Oh, yes, it's lovely but... well, as you said, not much is going on here. What is art without an audience?
  374. >Anon hangs his head
  375. >You think you might have hurt his feelings
  376. A: Yeah, this town is pretty boring... well, maybe we can...
  377. >You hear voices coming from another room
  378. >A door leading to the upper floor opens up and light shines down the steps
  379. Person: So, I says to them, I says, "Doll, if ya think ya can handle the big apple, get ya'self on the train tonight". And would'ya believe it, but she just left!
  380. Person Also: Oh, wow, ain't that the story. Half the peoples I know are already moving to da' city for'a betta' life
  381. >Two women stop halfway down the steps and Anon scoots you behind some junk
  382. >That was quite rude!
  383. Person: Hey! Who'a you? What'a ya doin' in here?
  384. >The second human seems to be a bit more frightened of Anon
  385. A: Oh, uh, I was just... um... looking for a bathroom?
  386. Person: Can't ya just pee on the building like all the other bums?
  387. A: Hey! I ain't a bum!
  388. Person Also: Ease up, Shirley, I'm sure dis guy here's just some lost mook
  389. Person: I don't know, Jan, he's kind'a got mask like a robba'?
  390. A: What mask?
  391. Person: The one on ya head, dummy?
  392. A: I'm not wearing a mask
  393. >Anon picks up a half mask that is painted white
  394. A: But, now I am the phantom! Bring me my piano so that I may lament!
  395. Person: OK, ya cuckoo, get out or I'll call the feds
  396. A: Fine, fine
  397. >Anon speeds over to the light switch on the wall
  398. A: I bid you "ladies", good evening
  399. >Anon lets out a disturbing laugh and flicks the light off
  400. A: Rarity, come on!
  401. >You run to the exit
  402. >The light flips back on
  403. Shirely: Nice try, creep, but we got two switches here!
  404. >Everyone sees you run from behind the boxes
  405. >You stumble over some clutter on the floor
  406. >You look up to see Anon grimacing and race over to you
  407. A: Smooth, Marshmallow...
  408. >He gets you to your hooves
  409. R: I am a lady. We don't just go around hiding and escaping from things
  410. >You both stampede out with the two humans gawking your way
  411. Shirley: Was... was the a horse?
  412. Jan: I dink so...
  413. S: Sickos in this town...
  414. >You and Anon escape with what dignity you managed to keep
  415. >You both race to another part of the building
  416. A: OK, so maybe it's more active than I realized
  417. R: Who were those humans, Anon?
  418. A: No clue
  419. R: Did you hear what they were talking about?
  420. A: About heading into the city? Yeah, I've given it thought before
  421. >You hear the female voice coming from around the corner
  422. A: Shiiiiii~, we gotta hide you!
  423. R: Oh, no, I am not being stuffed in another tiny place, especially out here in all this filth
  424. >You spy garbage littering the ground and tip-hoof away from it
  425. A: If they see you... no telling what they'll do
  426. R: Please, Anon, I am a lady of class and sophistication. Surely, I will have no trouble in dealing with a few more humans
  427. >The first human rounds the corner and sees you two
  428. S: Stop right there, you'se guys!
  429. J: If ya don't mind, that is
  430. >The human known as Shirley seems to be a strong runner and closes the distances with you in no time
  431. >The other, Jan, is slowly trailing behind her
  432. S: The jig is up
  433. >Anon brandishes a foam sword and is wearing the half mask from earlier
  434. A: Back! Back I say!
  435. >He lunges and weaves in a silly fashion
  436. S: That horse talked, I heard her
  437. R: Well, of course. I am fluent in multiple languages
  438. >You bounce your mane on a hoof and pose ever so slightly
  439. >The human stands a little awkward now with her mouth hanging open
  440. A: Oh, boy... this is the part where we go to jail...
  441. J: Shirley, stop runnin' every where *pant*, ya know I'm not as fast as ya
  442. S: This horse can talk! That's crazy!
  443. J: It really can? No foolin'?
  444. S: Yeah, yeah, watch it!
  445. >Every human on the street is now watching you and you do not want to disappoint
  446. >You lean in and whisper to Anon
  447. R: What do I say?
  448. A: How about, "You are both hallucinating?"
  449. >You shake your head and chuckle
  450. >Anon is so silly sometimes
  451. R: My name is Rarity and I am from Ponyville. Pleased to meet you two
  452. S+J: Noooo~ way! That's crazy!
  453. >Anon holds his hand to his face
  454. A: And we have a long trot back home, so if you will excuse us...
  455. S: Wha'? Ya can't leave! We wanna see ya pet!
  456. >You scoff at that remark
  457. R: Pet? I am no pet! Anon here is my friend, no my owner
  458. >Anon places his hand to his face and pushes his checks up
  459. A: The best of friends!
  460. >The two humans stare at you in amazement
  461. S: So, what's the trick here? How're gettin' her to talk?
  462. A: True AI and the miracle of Chinese laborers
  463. >Everyone looks at you skeptically
  464. A: Fine, the truth of the matter is that she is a pony from a magical land known as Equestria and that she was teleported here by mistake by yet another talking unicorn while trying to send me home from that magical land of ponies and rainbows.
  465. >How does Anon so accurately mimic Pinkie Pie?
  466. S: Ya really want me to believe that? I think that mask is too tight on ya, pal
  467. R: But, it's all true! I am a unicorn from the land of Equestria. Have you never seen another unicorn before?
  468. SS+J: Another?
  469. R: Oh my, I see why you are confused. You must only have earth ponies here. That would explain why it's called, "Earth" after all
  470. >You give a false laugh at the play on words
  471. J: I-if you're a unicorn... can ya show us your magic?
  472. >You think for a moment
  473. >Your public is expecting something grand
  474. >Wouldn't want humans to think unicorns were hacks compared to pegasi and earth ponies
  475. >Your horn glows intensely as you focus
  476. >A solid beam of light engulfs a nearby trash can and beautifies it
  477. R: Voilà! Not the easiest thing to tidy up, but I think you understand now, hmm?
  478. J: I always believed unicorns were real...
  479. S: Don't be a suck-up! Besides, unicorns are totally not like dis kind of unicorn
  480. J: When did ya become the unicorn-expert?
  481. S: Since always! Unicorns are like... virgin detectors and stuff. I figured hangin' out with'choo long enough would run me into one
  482. >Shirely gives a small laugh through her teeth
  483. J: H-hey! Ya promised not ta mention that!
  484. S: Sorry, sorry, my bad
  485. >These girls are clearly confused on unicorns
  486. R: Girls, if I may be so bold as to ask you. What were you doing in the theater?
  487. S: Ain't it obvious? We're gonna be stars on Broadway after this week's big performance
  488. J: Well, maybe not stars. All the cameras in ya face all the time can be scary
  489. >The more you speak with these girls, the more you are reminded of somep0ny
  490. S: Come on, Janet, stop with all the butterflies
  491. >Shirley nudges Jan playfully
  492. J: Oh, well, I guess if you're with me that'd be a different story
  493. S: Dat'a girl, now come on! We got more rehearsin' ta do! You'se two can come along and watch us if ya want
  494. >Anon looks to you
  495. R: I do so love stage production. You wouldn't mind, would you, Anon?
  496. >Anon looks at you with a hint of boredom in his expression
  497. A: Fine, if only because you're going to pout and make me feel bad anyways
  498. >You clap your hooves together and smile widely
  499. >To the stage tonight!
  500.  
  501. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
  502.  
  503. >Day Diamond Encrusted Brooch on Earth
  504. >Be Rarity
  505. >The night has found you two new human friends to add to your ever growing repertoire of associates
  506. >The girls, Janet and Shirley, are both entertaining and seem to have high energy for what they love
  507. >It is the surest sign of talent you have ever seen and, had you not known better, you would swear their cutie mark would be in theater
  508. >You find yourself in Janet's apartment this morning with Anonymous cooking as he so often does for you
  509. >Shirley sits lazily at a small table set for four and grumbles about the wait
  510. >Anon whistles a little tune before speaking to the pan in front of him
  511. >"How do you like your eggs, Rarara?"
  512. "I wish you wouldn't pronounce my name like that, Anon..."
  513. >"So, over-easy?"
  514. >You snort quickly before taking a seat and folding your napkin in your lap
  515. "...Two pieces of wheat toast as well and a glass of orange juice, no pulp."
  516. >Shirley watches you with a curiosity you have not seen since Anonymous
  517. >"So, what's magic like?"
  518. >You shrug lightly and flip your mane to one side
  519. "Whatever do you mean, darling?"
  520. >"Well, it's like... comin' outta your head and all. Does it hurt?"
  521. "Not at all! Although it does get tiring if used excessively."
  522. >A small voice perks up as Janet brings Anon a stack of plates
  523. >"A unicorn, that's so fascinatin'. How did ya' meet this guy?"
  524. "Anonymous? Oh, well, he sort of found us, actually. He fell out of the sky one day and landed right in Ponyville."
  525. >Anonymous smiles and flips his spatula off the side of the stove before scooping some eggs onto a clean, blue plate
  526. >"It's all true! Then I went on some hilarious adventure with a bunch of ponies who almost killed me on multiple occasions. Princess Celestia was most notably the craziest. She made me spend time with Twilight."
  527. >You snicker a bit and remember when you discovered Anon's misfortune
  528. "Twilight -is- a good friend, she just gets carried away when it comes to cataloging."
  529. >"I liked Pinkie, at the very least. She only tried to force feed me cupcakes."
  530. >You ruffle up your tail a bit as a hint of jealousy passes by you
  531. >"Whoa, Princess? What's that about?"
  532. >Shirley looks at you with raised eyebrows
  533. "Oh, yes, we have two princesses who rule over the nation. Princess Celestia, who raises the sun each morning, and Princess Luna, who raises the moon each night. Do you have a princess here as well?"
  534. >Janet looks to Shirley and shrugs
  535. >"Nah, that junk's for the peep's in Britain. We got a president."
  536. "What is a president?"
  537. >"A blowhard that talks a lot of stuff and gets mixed results."
  538. >You don't feel that answered your question, but you also can't be certain anything else Shirley says is going to make sense
  539. >A polite nod is all you need to end this confusing conversation
  540. >Janet carries three plates to the table with expert balancing skills
  541. >She quickly lays them out on the table before sitting across from Shirley
  542. >You look at the divine breakfast in front of you and smile
  543. >Anonymous is so good with the little details that truly make a meal
  544. "Are you going back to the stage tonight?"
  545. >Janet smiles easily at you
  546. >"Oh, yes, we still have a lot of rehearsing to do."
  547. >Shirley speaks through a bite of her egg sandwich
  548. >"Yeah, lots to do... haven't even finished... the costumes."
  549. >She gulps loudly as she swallows and takes a drink of water quickly
  550. >A bit uncouth, you think, but it seems vaguely comfortable to have a fast talking, fast acting friend around
  551. >She could be Rainbow Dash... if Rainbow Dash was a human
  552. >Anon finally takes a seat across from you and sets a very modest breakfast before himself
  553. >You look to your own with a bit of doubt
  554. "Anon, darling, would you like a piece of toast?"
  555. >"No, thank you. Feel like egg whites this morning. Got to stay healthy, right?"
  556. >Janet giggles a little to you and looks to Anon
  557. >"So, Anonymous, how long were ya' in Equestria?"
  558. >"Oh, uh, not sure. Probably a few years, although time seemed to work differently there. It moves faster than here, if I was able to properly deduce the calendar."
  559. >You look at Anonymous with a bit of curiosity all your own
  560. >Shirley snorts quickly through her water before sobering up
  561. >"Man, that must'a been hard, right? Nothin' but ponies around ya'?"
  562. >Janet is the first to catch on to what Shirley is implying
  563. >"Now, Shirley, don't start that! I'm sure he..."
  564. >"Are you implying I had sex with a pony?"
  565. >Shirley spits a mouthful of water, followed by riotous laughter and Janet's face flushes white as her eyes sink into her head
  566. >You are slightly surprised at the way Anon phrased himself, but only slightly
  567. "Darling, this isn't proper breakfast talk..."
  568. >Your tail seems to wrap itself a little tighter around your bottom as you think about your first few days on Earth with Anonymous
  569. >Anon grins widely at the two girls on either side of him and poses to show off his muscle
  570. >"Not to toot my own horn, but I had the undivided attention of quite a few ladies in Equestria."
  571. "Anon..."
  572. >"Like that minty green unicorn, what's her name again? Lyra, I think. Don't forget Berry! Could that one ever drink! Fluttershy probably gave me the most trouble though."
  573. >He continues to flex and pose as he names off different mares and you are sure most of this is nothing short of male exaggeration
  574. >By the time he finishes, Janet is hiding her red face beneath the tablecloth and Shirley is laying on the floor, gasping for breath
  575. "I cannot take you anywhere, Anonymous! Honestly, must you be so... so... -you-?"
  576. >Shirley springs up suddenly from the floor and slides back into her seat
  577. >"Oh my gosh, you two are totally datin'!"
  578. "What? No! Anonymous is just a friend!"
  579. >"Yeah, ya' boyfriend!"
  580. >Shirley mocks you lightly with her teeth held between her teeth
  581. >"Rarity and I? I don't know, she has seen me naked before..."
  582. >A fearful squeal rings from Janet as she looks you over
  583. "I have not!"
  584. >"Oh? Remember when you fixed my face?"
  585. >You think back to that day and how hopeless you were
  586. >His eyes were the most beautiful you had even seen and you shamefully let him rub your horn out like some lowly animal in heat
  587. >Celestia knows what terrible perversions ran through your infatuated head that night
  588. "Seeing your face is -not- seeing you naked! Besides, clothing isn't the norm in Ponyville!"
  589. >You bang a hoof on the wooden table to the astonished silence of the three humans
  590. >A feeling of unease over takes you as you feel a little more than outnumbered
  591. >"Sorry, Rare-bear, I didn't mean to upset you like that..."
  592. >The apology drifts around you for the moment and you look to Anon with optimistic eyes
  593. >"I-it's not really somethin' we have to discuss."
  594. >Janet gets up quickly and begins to gather the dirty dishes
  595. >What an awkward morning this was turning out to be!
  596. >You find your center and breathe easily as you return to your ladylike state
  597. >The rest of the morning goes over well as the four of your get better acquainted and learn a bit more about each other
  598. >Anonymous seems to be particularly silly in the presence of others and you wonder if this is normal for him
  599. >He acted more mature around your pony friends, you think, but cannot say for certain
  600. >The topic of the play comes up again and you add your thoughts into this
  601. >"I am an accomplished seamstress in Ponyville and have thousands of designs under my hoof. It would be an honour to help you two create fabulous costumes for your show."
  602. >Shirley rubs her chin in deep though before looking to Janet
  603. >Janet is the first to answer you
  604. >"If you can sew, well, that'd be fine by me. I mean, if it ain't too much trouble for ya', that is?"
  605. "Of course not, darling! I -live- to create!"
  606. >"Well, we got a lotta good stuff to work with already. Lets go by the theater and see what you can do."
  607. >"In the daylight!? What if someone see's us?"
  608. >Anon looks to you, but all you do is shrug
  609. "Darling, other humans have taken to moi without effort."
  610. >You bounce your mane in one hoof and twirl once for effect before looking up at him
  611. >"You know... I think you have let your current fame get to your head. Not everyone is so nice."
  612. >Shirley tuts her teeth as she slips a shoe over her foot
  613. >"'Ey, love birds, lets get on track here!"
  614. >You turn your nose up at the comment
  615. >Sure, Anonymous is a nice guy and maybe he's a fairly decent dresser and perhaps he has always been rather nice to you
  616. >These signs do not, however, point to Anon being your special somep0ny!
  617. >Pushing aside these silly thoughts, you make your way out into the hall
  618. >Janet and Shirley are the first to meet you with Anon taking up the rear
  619. >You move casually through the empty building and wonder if other humans live behind each numbered door
  620. "Are there a lot of people in this building? The building where Anonymous lives is nearly empty."
  621. >"Nah, most people moved already. This place gets emptier everyday."
  622. >Janet frowns a bit as she speaks before Anon chimes in
  623. >"I don't know about you, but I am enjoying the plummeting price on rent."
  624. >Shirley laughs quickly as she descends the staircase
  625. >"Right up until these places get shut down and we're livin' on the streets."
  626. >This ghastly talk of losing their homes does not seem to effect either of the three humans
  627. >You could not imagine how awful it would be to lose your boutique and you certainly wouldn't speak so lightly of it
  628. "What would you do if you have to leave your home?"
  629. >Anonymous shrugs as he reaches for the door leading outside
  630. >"Find a new apartment, I suppose? Maybe I would finally move to the city."
  631. >Janet replies in kind and Shirley nods
  632. >"It would be the best we got... but, we ain't got to worry about that tonight! After tonight, we'll be famous enough to buy our own place in the Hills. Won't we, Jan?"
  633. >"Oh, yeah, that little cottage. Ya' think we'd finally be able to afford it?"
  634. >Shirley holds Janet's hand with all the elegance you've come to expect from her and smiles widely
  635. >"Bet my ass, we will!"
  636. >You smirk at the strange expression and stare at the thin human's body
  637. >Their hope and determination makes you feel like their struggle as you too have always longed for stardom under the bright lights of your own home
  638. >You say to yourself that you will create the most exquisite costumes Earth, or Equestria for that matter, had ever beheld
  639. >If anyone deserved a chance to be happy, it was these two good friends
  640. >The trip to the theater is quick from this building and, in the daylight, you can see the world around you for the first time
  641. >Metal contraptions line themselves along the sidewalk in different colours and you marvel at the shining reflections some give off
  642. >Street lamps of various sizes and designs dot the sidewalks and even some buildings
  643. >You walk with your head tilted back as to view the skyline until you feel something hard halt you
  644. "Anonymous! What are you trying..."
  645. >"It's bad enough you look like a pony. Must you look like a pony-tourist as well?"
  646. "Well, I never!"
  647. >Janet leans down a bit and speaks softly in your ear
  648. >"I think he wanted to stop ya' from steppin' in that gum."
  649. >You suddenly look down and panic around the sticky blob on the floor
  650. >Celestia knows how hard gum is to get out of a gorgeous coat such as your own
  651. >You look up to Anon, but he quickly walks on
  652. >A smile parts your face as you think Anonymous is looking out for you, if not being a bit coy today
  653. >He reaches for another door and opens it wide as the two girls and yourself step in
  654. >The cackle of energy surges through the room as Anonymous flips the light switch and you quickly begin to take inventory
  655. >You spy two human shaped mannequins and beam at the industrial sewing machine table
  656. "Alright, girls, I hope you're ready for a lesson in fabulosity!"
  657. >Janet giggles and Shirley shrugs
  658. >"Just make sure we look cool."
  659. "I can do better than that! But, first, if you wouldn't mind helping me with the smallest of favours..."
  660. >Every person in the room helps you tidy up over the next half hour or so
  661. >No way you could concentrate with dust getting in the way of your artistic vision
  662. >Anonymous pats his hands out on his pants before nodding to you
  663. >"How do I get myself into these things?"
  664. "Because, darling, you are a true gentlecolt."
  665. >Shirley takes a moment and grades your remark before snickering
  666. >"Never heard that one before."
  667. "Oh, my apologies, a gentle -man-?"
  668. >"Implying I care if you use ponyisms on me."
  669. >Your boisterous human friend laughs to herself
  670. >"This guy's a riot! Who even talks like that?"
  671. >No distraction, you think, there is much work to be done!
  672. "Ladies, if I may. I need to take your measurements. Anonymous, please step outside."
  673. >Anon grumbles to himself as he stomps from the room
  674. >You smirk as you lift a tape measure into the end and feel it flex in your magic
  675. "Now you shall witness the art of the dress!"
  676. >The human girls look at you and then to each other with a hint of worry on their faces
  677. >"I-is this gonna hurt?"
  678. "Only if you don't cooperate, darling!"
  679.  
  680. >On a stoop outside of the theater
  681. >Be Anonymous
  682. >You hum a tune to yourself as you await the word to enter
  683. >It seems weird to think you have to be outside while Rarity fits someone
  684. >Ponies were usually not dressed in your presence to begin with!
  685. >You contemplate taking a peak through the window to see if human flesh was as interesting if you remember
  686. >No, you are a gentleman and a scholar
  687. >Also, Rarity would absolutely murder you if you were caught
  688. >A few people are finally roaming the street and you watch them as you so often do
  689. >Look at them, just mindlessly wondering around like zombies
  690. >Their slacked jawed stare in the outer abyss coupled with their staggering gait is just so very...
  691. >Wait, that is just like a zombie!
  692. >You stare at a few as they roam pass you and notice their eyes have an eerie greenish hue to them
  693. "Excuse me, sir! A moment of your time."
  694. >You stand to your feet as the shuffling man turns slowly in your direction
  695. >He opens his mouth once with a gargling noise before he begins to hobble toward you
  696. >"Lo~ve..."
  697. >Well, if that didn't make your skin crawl, nothing would!
  698. >It does not take long for your legs to get you back into the fitting room
  699. >A marshmallow hoof presses up against your leg as you slam the door
  700. >"Anon! Ladies are changing in here!"
  701. "People are changing outside too!"
  702. >"What?"
  703. >A bang on the door startles you and you back up a bit
  704. >The door opens outward, so no amount of pushing would be able to open it
  705. >Another bang causes Janet to look up from under a frilly gown
  706. >"Who's knocking?"
  707. "The question is what is knocking... I think we have zombies, my friends."
  708. >Shirley looks at you with a cocked brow
  709. >"Zombies? Yeah, sure."
  710. "I call it like I see it. We should wrap this up and consider escaping... now."
  711. >Rarity looks you over before her face takes on serious appearance
  712. >"Anon is telling the truth..."
  713. >The girls look over to you quickly before Janet speaks with a wavering voice
  714. >"W-what do ya' mean? Z-zombies aren't real, right?"
  715. "Neither are unicorns, but one is making a dress for you as we speak. So, can we exit through the stairwell?"
  716. >Shirley nods quickly as she works her light blue shirt back on
  717. >"It'll put on right back on the streets, though. How many did ya' see?"
  718. "A few, but that is not really comforting."
  719. >The banging at the door slowly fades away as you hear foot steps shuffle away
  720. >Everyone is silent as you await another noise
  721. >You creep to the stairs and quietly climb to the top
  722. >Everyone huddles in as you whisper to them
  723. "I will step out first to see if we are clear. I'll wave you in when I am certain."
  724. >You take a deep breath and reach for the door
  725. >Today just got weird...
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