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  1. DivineAnnihilation [~EgoAnnihi@tripsit/user/Egoannihilation] is now known as egoa|meth|heroin|xan
  2. [04:09:55] <+Mantra> sounds like a safe combo
  3. [04:11:17] <@reality> #nope
  4. [04:11:51] <+Dread> Lol
  5. [04:12:17] egoa|meth|heroin|xan [~EgoAnnihi@tripsit/user/Egoannihilation] is now known as egoa|meth|hafterglow
  6. [04:12:29] <+egoa|meth|hafterglow> not all at the same time
  7. [04:12:44] <+Dread> Pretty sure just having egoa|meth|heroin|xan in your general proximity will get you arrested for possession
  8. [04:12:47] <+Dread> Lol
  9. [04:13:15] <+egoa|meth|hafterglow> does anyone care about me slightly that they can dedicate 15 mins tot alking to me
  10. [04:13:24] <+egoa|meth|hafterglow> everyone ahs blown me off all night
  11. [04:13:31] <+egoa|meth|hafterglow> and im in a really really bad place
  12. [04:13:38] <+egoa|meth|hafterglow> and i jus tneed someone to listen
  13. [04:13:45] Connection to server lost
  14. [04:14:55] EgoAnnihilation [~EgoAnnihi@tripsit/user/Egoannihilation] has joined #tripsitvip
  15. [04:14:55] Channel topic is: Welcome to #tripsitvip! Channel for regulars registered with NickServ. No trolls. Dr Trip pities the fool who isn't in #home (and he's a real doctor) | Full list of commands: ~bots | Live Music ~tripradio
  16. [04:14:55] Topic was set by reality!~reality@tripsit/admin/reality on Tue Jan 6 20:26:07 2015
  17. [04:14:56] DrTripServington [drtrip@services.tripsit] has set mode +v EgoAnnihilation
  18. [04:15:05] coconut.tripsit.me [*@*] has set mode +FLgmnrtjf 5:10 #help
  19. [04:15:06] Channel was created at Fri Sep 13 03:59:28 2013
  20. [04:15:08] Channel synchronized in 12.0 seconds
  21. [04:15:26] <+adlai> WHOO BITCOIN BACK UP
  22. [04:15:33] <+EgoAnnihilation> forget it
  23. [04:15:50] <+Dread> What's wrong
  24. [04:15:55] <+EgoAnnihilation> my entire life
  25. [04:16:07] <+Dread> Well
  26. [04:16:27] <+Dread> Take it one thing at a time
  27. [04:16:35] <+EgoAnnihilation> i can't
  28. [04:17:11] <+Dread> I think your main problems are probably linked in with drugs, no?
  29. [04:17:16] <+EgoAnnihilation> cool, the guy i dont even know msgs me
  30. [04:17:21] <+EgoAnnihilation> at least hes legit
  31. [04:17:27] <+EgoAnnihilation> more then that
  32. [04:17:51] egoa|meth|hafterglow [~EgoAnnihi@tripsit/user/Egoannihilation] has quit IRC: Ping timeout: 272 seconds
  33. [04:18:22] <+EgoAnnihilation> good to know the people I think as family can't even bother to pm me
  34. [04:18:42] <+Dread> People are in and out, man
  35. [04:18:47] <+Dread> I'm in class rn
  36. [04:18:48] <+Dread> Lol
  37. [04:18:54] <+EgoAnnihilation> not directed to you
  38. [04:18:57] <+EgoAnnihilation> you at least responded
  39. [04:19:00] <+EgoAnnihilation> <3
  40. [04:19:01] <+Dread> Hard to see past the text
  41. [04:19:06] <+EgoAnnihilation> Ill miss you dread
  42. [04:19:16] Colin [~Colin@tripsit/user/colin] has quit IRC: Quit: http://tripsit.me/ - Harm Reduction Through Education
  43. [04:19:20] <+Dread> Where are you going?
  44. [04:19:48] <+Dread> Yknow, you're coming down right now, yes?
  45. [04:19:56] <+EgoAnnihilation> I don't see any point coming back here
  46. [04:20:03] <+Dread> Its going to affect your mood
  47. [04:20:05] <+EgoAnnihilation> Im not coming down
  48. [04:20:15] <+EgoAnnihilation> I actually took all these drugs because my girlfriend bailed on vday
  49. [04:20:23] <+EgoAnnihilation> but ive been living in a dream
  50. [04:20:38] <+Mantra> who cares
  51. [04:20:40] <+Mantra> its a made up day anyway
  52. [04:20:47] <+Dread> Tbh, not saying you should leave tripsit or anything,
  53. [04:21:01] <+EgoAnnihilation> i dont see the point in staying
  54. [04:21:02] <+Dread> But it does make people think about drugs a lot
  55. [04:21:09] <+EgoAnnihilation> that snot it at all
  56. [04:21:11] <+Dread> Not ideal
  57. [04:21:21] <@reality> is that the same gf who lives accross the country somewhere
  58. [04:21:28] <+EgoAnnihilation> 6 hours
  59. [04:21:38] <+EgoAnnihilation> i was saying thats why i got the drugs
  60. [04:21:43] <+EgoAnnihilation> this sint what i mean
  61. [04:21:55] <+EgoAnnihilation> er
  62. [04:21:55] <@reality> it's not healthy to respond to badthings by taking lots of drugs
  63. [04:22:00] <+EgoAnnihilation> i know
  64. [04:22:15] <@reality> because then things get worse.. and you get worse at dealing with things in any other way
  65. [04:22:16] <+EgoAnnihilation> anyway
  66. [04:22:19] <+EgoAnnihilation> this isn't
  67. [04:22:25] <+EgoAnnihilation> what i was talking about
  68. [04:22:38] <@reality> what are you talking about?
  69. [04:23:48] <+Dread> We want to help you, but you have to inform us of what is going on
  70. [04:24:03] <+Dread> Otherwise we'll just be giving you platitudes
  71. [04:24:18] <+EgoAnnihilation> that this community meant everything to me, my support, my only social area, my friends, people i cared about and vice versa. But I dunno if its cuz im a criminal, or cuz im an IV junkie, or what. or m aybe my stupidty of what I did with my health problem in tripsit. (which was my biggest mistake ever)
  72. [04:24:24] <+EgoAnnihilation> or maybe im just annoying as fuck
  73. [04:24:35] <+EgoAnnihilation> but every since i came back from jail
  74. [04:24:46] <+EgoAnnihilation> half the old timers hate me or something
  75. [04:25:03] <@reality> i don't think anyone hates you
  76. [04:25:10] <+EgoAnnihilation> reality
  77. [04:25:22] <+EgoAnnihilation> even you distanced yourself from me
  78. [04:25:47] <+EgoAnnihilation> someone i wont name broke my heart when i might
  79. "steal" if i stayed with them
  80. [04:25:54] <+EgoAnnihilation> but i didnt care
  81. [04:25:59] <+EgoAnnihilation> if people are gonna judge me
  82. [04:26:00] <+EgoAnnihilation> so wha
  83. [04:26:01] <+EgoAnnihilation> t
  84. [04:26:06] <@reality> honestly it's difficult to talk/maintain communication to someone who is rekt on drugs a lot of the time
  85. [04:26:31] <@reality> i mean i know that's the point of the network kinda but still
  86. [04:26:43] <+EgoAnnihilation> I was difficult to comprehend?
  87. [04:26:48] <+EgoAnnihilation> or just annoying tweaked out
  88. [04:26:49] <+EgoAnnihilation> which i was
  89. [04:26:50] <+EgoAnnihilation> i know
  90. [04:26:56] <@reality> well if you're on meth you're typing essays at me
  91. [04:27:01] <+EgoAnnihilation> redicilously
  92. [04:27:12] <+EgoAnnihilation> I type super fast
  93. [04:27:17] <+adlai> how fast
  94. [04:27:30] <+adlai> we should have a typeoff
  95. [04:27:31] <+EgoAnnihilation> stupidly annoying typo ridden fast
  96. [04:27:33] Sara [~Xas@tripsit/user/Xas] has joined #tripsitvip
  97. [04:27:34] DrTripServington [drtrip@services.tripsit] has set mode +v Sara
  98. [04:27:36] <+EgoAnnihilation> but anyway
  99. [04:27:37] <+adlai> flatmate is convinced that i am the fastest typer on earth
  100. [04:27:38] <+Mantra> i bet i can type faster
  101. [04:27:40] <+EgoAnnihilation> i guess
  102. [04:27:59] <+Dread> Can't believe this fucking lecture is over already
  103. [04:28:00] adlai actually rarely breaks 100wpm
  104. [04:28:07] <+Dread> Why do they waste our time with this shit
  105. [04:28:25] <+Dread> At least I can go back to bed now
  106. [04:28:38] <+Sara> i tpye lsow
  107. [04:28:39] <+Sara> slow
  108. [04:28:39] <+EgoAnnihilation> this community means the world to me, and tonight i needed somone so bad to just listen to me. And all the people I consider my best friends just blew me off
  109. [04:28:41] <+Sara> :(
  110. [04:29:09] <+Mantra> EgoAnnihilation: you asked 10 minutes ago
  111. [04:29:26] <+EgoAnnihilation> and i mean, the older people dont like me. so i should just leave
  112. [04:29:28] <@reality> if you want to talk to someone specifically, you can initiate a conversation in pm with them
  113. [04:29:30] <+Mantra> you are on drugs and things seem much more immediate than they really are
  114. [04:29:49] <+EgoAnnihilation> i asked in here if one person could talk to me
  115. [04:30:19] <@reality> and several people were like 'y'
  116. [04:30:22] <+EgoAnnihilation> adlai was the only one who pm me. I'm not gonna PM others when 9/9 have basicallyt oldme to fuck off
  117. [04:30:25] <+EgoAnnihilation> oh i got dropped
  118. [04:30:25] <@reality> at the time i was afk, because i'm at work
  119. [04:30:32] <+EgoAnnihilation> really?
  120. [04:30:36] <+EgoAnnihilation> wow
  121. [04:30:43] <+EgoAnnihilation> now i feel like a fucking idot
  122. [04:30:57] <@reality> don't be so hard on yourself x_x
  123. [04:31:20] <+adlai> irc on drugs is much trickier than it seems
  124. [04:31:24] <+EgoAnnihilation> i hate myself reality
  125. [04:31:31] <+EgoAnnihilation> but anyway
  126. [04:31:35] <+EgoAnnihilation> now i beyond embarassed
  127. [04:31:41] <+adlai> here's a suggestion
  128. [04:31:58] <+adlai> channel your hate towards specific past actions, rather than a generalized "hate myself"
  129. [04:32:07] <+adlai> leave yourself room to improve in the future
  130. [04:32:39] <+adlai> "i regret doing X and saying Y to Z" is much healthier/whateveryouwannacallit than "i hate myself because i did X and ..."
  131. [04:32:51] <+adlai> </platitudes>
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