Update

The past week I've been pressuring myself to do an 100% run as soon as possible, despite knowing that ultimately this will result in a fairly low quality run. I know people in general do not enjoy watching practice nearly as much, so this led me to rush through practice, and refrain from grinding practice nearly as much as I should. When the day came that I said I would do my first run, I wasn't even close to prepared, and knew the run would likely die early if I attempted it, so I didn't even stream that day, and instead practiced more offline. However, after that day, the stress from not being ready to do runs yet got to me and I didn't deal with it well. I refrained from practicing altogether to avoid thinking about it and only set myself further behind.

I don't blame anyone but myself for this. My viewers have every right to express what they want to see, and it's my job to know how much practice I need, and when I'm actually ready to do full runs, and to prioritize myself getting to that stage as efficiently as possible. With that being said, I'm going to aim for my first full run to be this weekend, but I'm not going to promise it and if I'm not ready, then I will practice more. Sorry for letting this get to me, because honestly if I'd practiced the last 2 days we might be much closer to full runs.