CRAB 5 - R1 Commentary

Chad (V) - Great work, love Chad. The entry really extends my impression of him perfectly, with a very naturally flowing sort of humor with its goofy, gag oriented comedy. Also pretty interesting in how it feels like it does a lot with with a pretty simple premise. Art's great too and dig the spritework, hellhound designs are very nice. Doe feels spot on, and the blunt ending is hilarious. Very solid all around.

Doe Deerly - Again, great job. Funny humor, although slightly less smoothly delivered I feel (perhaps too much swag?). That said, definitely a difficult choice, as the satan similarity gag is solid and both dogs are quite cool (particularly like the fire dog's squinty face). Stylization is solid.


Liddell - Heavy, I was surprised by the darker tone. Lovely art as always, both Liddell and Blossom are adorable. The story itself was more serious than I anticipated, but it's fitting for the Blossom and the setting. It did contrast with my expectations of Liddel, whom I figured would inject more levity in the situation. She feels a bit muffled here, I find myself wanting the Liddell knob to be cranked up a few more notches (although perhaps it's because she's more grounded than my first impression? Since it's presented from her internal perspective as a narrator, I can kind of get how the sort of "chill"/impartial way she might see things could tint it). Overall, things felt muted for me, and a litle verbose. I also think Blossom's backstabbing was abrupt. While we HAVE seen her tendency for violence, I think it could have benefited from being a little bit more telegraphed through the comic beyond the brief glare just before. Sort of like a building tension that's later released. I can see how the abruptness might be intentional, since it's from Liddell's perspective and she wasn't expecting it, but it nonetheless comes off bumpy to me. I also wish we got to see some magic! Aside from these elements, it's a good plot with a nice twist, and Blossom's burning angst is a compelling way to close things out for the more serious tone taken here.

Blossom (V) - A tea party DOES always help :D. Very cool comic, neat references, and I really enjoy how it feels like we get so much out with the distinct sort of stages it progress through. I also really enjoyed your execution of the characters, very distinct, good mouthfeel, tactile. Intro is super cool, and I like their intial approach to handling their chalenge. I am a little mixed on the pshcological angle, it feels like we're suddenly diving into her issues and analyzing them when I barely know her outside yet (aside from being prickly). That said, ignoring when this is happening, it executes the angle very nicely. The parallel between Liddell and Vivian is quite clever to have her project, and the second portion where she's talking to herself as a child is nice. I'm interpreting it as Liddell "manipulating"/playing a rather aggressive therapist, so I hope that's the intended read. I find it much more compelling for it to be an application of Liddell's tricks than a coincidental face touch transition. The vine attack's scarring feels a bit much, it's hard for me to see Liddell going overboard since I feel like she'd no-diff Blossom. Overall, very nice work, an ejoyable read and I like the happy ending for our angsty little flower.


Natum (V) - I feel like every entry you make is cooler than the last. Phenomenal work. From the gorgeous artwork to the rich context you've developed. Really nice humor interspersed throughout as well, manages to keep the intense tone while having some pretty goofy bits, Locket's smug face after the bullying comment is great, fuhrer in heaven too. Satan is pretty neat, considering it misses the lisp I probably shouldn't have read it as such, but the close up of the goggle faked me out thinking it was a TW thing, but that wound up making the actual reveal more interesting in the end. Solid writing, it reads well, and the banter between the pair is fun, the various characters all have a nice distinct voice. Also like Natum saving Locket in the end, and the plot hook for the future. Really great work.

Locket - Hilarious. Lots of funny stuff with Gretchen before but this entire thing left me laughing with a grin. This was tough for me, as I got such a kick out of the whole thing, and I find it funnier. Even aside from the humor it's nicely written, Natum feels well-executed, and the art is really punchy. The race itself is interesting, the twists and turns it takes to ultimately reach the end is quite satisfying and we get a lot out of it. Locket's backhanded help is perfect, what an absolute brat. Also always love seeing the wider cast, poor peasey-three... Excellent job, was a blast, I love Locket.


Skater Stick (V) - Diabolically rad. I really enjoyed how cool you made Junko, and of course, skater is as sick as always. Like the lines, despite the simplicity, it's stylized quite nicely, and the swoopy gesture of things is quite pleasing (and I get a kick out of skater's hat bill, neat way to make him look fast). Pg 10's depth is neat despite the styling, I've always enjoyed that sort of "high-quality stick figure" appearance (when used in moderation, as seen here). Skate on skater stick.

Junko - Nice job! I'm happy to see a full fledged comic from you. The presentation of the dialogue could use some work, and writing a little awkward (though Junko's loanwording is amusing), but the initial plot is solid. Junko falling is a great idea, and while I might not have had her actually die there, I think dying could still work. However, I'm afraid I wasn't as into what followed. The fall would've been a great springboard to pose the secondary conflict she needs to overcome for the round, giving texture to the broader premise of escaping and making more "happen". Having it play straight and cut to her puppet afterlife and return to HQ and then a Blossom cliffhanger feels abrupt and irrelevant. I think it _might_ have worked if she spent some time in HQ, with Aero or whomever, to circle back to the round (e.g.: discussing what happened afterward, maybe a flashback of Aero describing what everyone else witnessed, etc). Although personally I would've stayed in hell or at least drawn out the death. The Blossom closer I think would be better excluded, as while I can understand from meta information why she'd say it, within the context of the comic it again feels irrelevant and confusing, and gives the impression that everything else we just saw was sort of secondary to this (unearned) conclusion. That said, I get it, and plot hooks, teasers, cliffhangers are all interesting to include, but I'd need more from the main portion first, and smoother segue.


S.H.A.E. - Very sweet, SHAE's wonderful, really enjoy her design. Good stuff overall, nice art, dig the satan, and I like the way it handles their lack of fiddling skills with the alternative match. Simments' spontaneous fall feels a little awkward, I'm guessing the rock just cracks but I think it could be clearer. Besides that, it worked well, SHAE's softer demeanor compared to Simments' eccentricity is nicely presented, and I think you do both of them justice. Great work!

Simments (V) - Gorgeous, from your pit entry I knew you had some sick skills but this is really incredible. The stylization is spot on, and every character is handled very nicely. SHAE looks awesome, and you did a great job presenting her more timid personality in the face of the extreme circumstances she's faced with. Some of the dialogue is a bit more wordy than I think it needs to be, which makes some of the panels not as smooth to go through, particular with the incredibly high fidelity visuals. That said, it's nicely distinguished, both in terms of voice and visual. I again enjoyed the way you handled their lack of fiddle skills, and it was interesting to see the more deceptive side of Simments, making him feel more dangerously unpredictable than just eccentric. Nice end too, very fitting for the nature of the tournament, as much as I adore SHAE. Overwall, fantastic work, the visuals really blew me away.


Uprise - Nice job, very hellish. Halos are pretty neat, I wonder if a damned soul would have one as a contrast. The plot could be a little more developed I think, it dives into it abruptly and could have more to the fight. Liddell's cameo is cute. I think it would've been a little more interesting to explore Uprise's powerless nature, espceially since he seems to be going toe to toe with the devil and even tanks a direct blast. His kung fu may be strong, but that's on another level. I'd chalk it up to them already being dead, but if that's the case for it, then perhaps a nod to him recognizing the disparity? That said, I also can see how it may be like the "obvious" low hanging frit to have him be too focused on his power, and there could be more to explore than just that. However if there is, we don't get to see it here beyond the surface cocky hero.

Aeroa and Sonata (V) - Very cool, I like the art, and I enjoyed what you did with uprise. Some nice humor too, the banter between Aero and Uprise is charming, and I like how you gave Uprise a bit of opportunity to shine within his limits. Exploring him beyond his outward persona when paired with someone as high-powered as Sonata is excellent. Sonata himself is a little flat, and I slightly struggle to click with his design as the super hero MC (maybe it's just because we get more Aero focus). I loved their "fight" in the end, we get the cheesy "good guy" remark from Sonata encouraging him (which I actually felt would've been a touch too stereotypical if it weren't for the followup), but the blunt cut to cratered Uprise is perfect. Fitting writing, and again, nice art, the angles you choose are pretty interesting, and I love that somewhat classic style.


Bethany - Delicious art. Howver, painfully missing the bulk of the dialogue as I can only vaguely tell that Bethany appears to be talking to Stub about her history, but beyond that it's unclear to me. It also seems like it doesn't quite resolve. That said, neat scenes, stub turning to face her is awesome.

Stub (V) - Stellar, I love your art, it's really hits the mark of what it seems to be going for. The sense of scale, the figures, the intense tangibility of the action, the setting, all really solid.  Very interesting writing too, the context with Jev instructing him over the radio is clever and I love how it pads out the world and their team. The plot itself is direct, but entertaining, and I like how we get that final shot of his absolute lack of self preservation or concern when achieving his goal. Really interesting character, and the shot of his "nature" is such a great way to end it in a way that expands on him so organically after the pit entry. Excellent work.


Vaire (V) - A novella can be a tricky format, but your illustrations are really killer for this sort of thing. The writing is a bit simple, sort of directly describing event to event at times, however this does make it an easy read which is welcome. Very easy to get lost in itself if too flowery. That said, there are some awkward portions, either things getting too direct (descriptions of actions or environments just simply stating what she's looking at or what happened, without much imagery or other flourish that would spice things up), or explaining things out-of-order/in an unclear fashion. On the latter, for example when we're presented with the nursery, Vaire somewhat abruptly exclaims her hosts aren't caring for the children. To me as a reader, this feels like a strange conclusion, we haven't really seen anything to believe the children are neglected. This is resolved in reverse when Vaire runs through the building and sees its dilapitaed nature, but this is after I'm already confused. Similarly, when Vaire sees a monstrous Flower, it's initially described as an abomination, then in the next paragraph immediately described as Flower, with nothing connecting the two. If I weren't already aware that Flower has such a form, I'm left confused as to how the two relate. Even having known it, it still feels like a stumble as I'm reading. Among these, other little bits gave me similar pause. Zooming out a bit, the wider story as a whole is interesting, Vaire being forced to contend with the darker side of her faith, and the philosphers are fun. At this scale I think Flower's role could be developed further, she appears, harasses Vaire, and gets stabbed, whereas she might've had a bit more plot involvement. It's unclear WHY Vaire appears in limbo (she's there for CRAB of course, but is she being sent to defeat Flower? Overcome a cognitive dissonance?) or why she is taken back (we can kind of gather it's because she defeated Flower because of our meta-knowledge, but it feels unrelated to me). Expanding on Flower's role and actions beyond a fight could address this and give structure to this portion of the plot. It also feels like we leave too soon, we get all this set up of Vaire facing the nature of limbo and those sent there, but we don't get much of her processing it beyond shock and a sudden ascension of the souls. This is a bit of an involved response, although in the case of a novella there's more focus on the raw storytelling, so hopefully it isn't too nitpicky. My favorite part by far is the illustration. As I said initially, they're very fitting style-wise, and are quite gorgeous. I think it'd be cool to have one or two single panel images than only the comic-style paneling, but regardless, what we got is delicious. I really enjoy the direction of your aesthetic. Nice work.

Flower - Cool stuff! I like the mix between animatic and actual animations. It's a simple plot, but a funny reveal and the atmosphere of the set up is well executed. Even though we don't get to  see too much of the characters, they both feel fitting.


Gary (V) - Good stuff, didn't really know what to expect but this turned out to be great. Quite funny, I like the P*kemon angle going beyond just the fight to include the details of its mechanics and copyright grey areas. Janny's mom and their dynamic is a great idea, and I like how far it goes beyond the battle to save them as well. Gary's grace is blinding. I like how the different characters were handled, and the spin on the theme.

Janitor - Nice job, Janny back to his classic dutiful efforts. The premise is straightfoward, but has some good jokes, I like his new jumpsuit too. I think Gary could've gotten some more, though he certainly is a bit of an unusual character to go off of.


Edward (V) - Cute story. The beginning is a little unclear to me, who the black haired girl is, someone in hell? Someone from his past? I like how you've presented Mimi, as this ditzy airhead who, despite being in literal hell wants to celebrate Christmas to liven things up a bit. Pretty funny. 7 eleven in hell is pretty good too, although the skin flavored gum paneling tripped me up a bit with its flow. Nice way to tie in Edward's backstory, and the ending is charming.

Mimi - Pretty interesting. I'm really liking the direction the visuals take, this heavily stylized, flat look is neat. The manic energy of the comic is interesting as well. I'd consider this stronger, but I think it falls into its own frenzy a bit too much, sacrificing the coherency of the story. Further, it leaves out hell altogether. I do like what you've done with Edward, though he could be a bit more melancholic I feel. Pulling things from Mimi's context, her friends and home, is interesting, but I fear distracts from the content in the way it's presented. Since it's already a little scattered, it's treading close to losing what plot it does have with these elements. I really like the frenetic aspect here, so I would keep it, lean into it, but take care to retain something being told. As it stands, it feels more like elements of the prompt and the oponent thrown into a blender. For me, if it were a marginally more solid and self-contained plot line this would become significantly stronger without sacrificing what's making it unique.


Rachel - Didn't expect to see such a maternal instinct from the Rachel we've been exposed to so far. I like the depth it adds. I also enjoyed the team involvement here, from both sides, always love the wider CRAB stuff. That said, killing most of BioHazard felt a bit unlikely, as desperate as her mother bear nature might be. And it's hard to empathize with her when she did leave the antichrist alone in the middle of hell. Love the animated still of here on the hill, really cool. Would've liked to see a little more from Zakal too.

Zakal (V) - Sick art as always, dig what you've done with Rachel's hair. Your take on Simments is pretty cool too, lot of personality just from that little bit. I particularly enjoyed your format of the challenge, giving the kid a bit of development of his own, and the montage format contrasting the two. Rachel did manage pretty well though, if it were any brat but the antichrist it seems like she wouldn't be half bad. Nicely done.


Leon - What a great pairing, these two have wonderful chemistry and it'd probably be fun to see them in any situation. As it stands, their jaunt through hell is a treat, and I enjoy the detail in the locations and levels they pass through. I am slightly, moderately, somewhat excruciatingly pained by the font choice for Edric, however the rest of the format is just fine. The dialogue was also a bit busy at times, making things a little dense, a lot going on but also a lot going on. Lots of fun cameos, really enjoyed the ones playing roles within hell, kind of storybook-like. Nice character art as well.

Edric (V) - Good stuff. I like the initial getting dropped into hell and the casual hello to the already-skewered Leon. The story is pretty neat, and the pair playing therapist is amusing. The wretched duo overthrowing nerdy satan is fun, and Edric's sleazy haste to take the crown and then ditch it is perfect. Really liked the contrast between the two overall in it, despite their similarities. Nice work.


Bucket - What a bloodbath. Just raw, unchecked violence. Mostly. Nicely done, was pretty compelled by the action you showed off in the pit entry and I think it's flexed nicely here. Lot of fluidity in some of the shots, and the fighting itself is interesting. The tactics, the differences in weapons and foes, nice texture to what's largely battling. I particularly enjoyed Bucket chopping the big one in half with its own blade. Very nice to see it still grounding back in the plot of the characters. It's a quick taste, but it's substantial enough to get an impression of both of them without lingering. Great work.

Illwill (V) - Nice cover. Really liked the slow intro following bucket through the picked-clean landscape. His quick run-in with the mouth of- uh the son of dawn is a hilarious exchange. I love the contrast of the cartoony horse to the previous nightmare steed. It's a bit backloaded, giving us a lot to process at the end, but I enjoyed the deeper plot and I always like team comradery, even if it's a bit complex for him.


Tobias - Cute interactions, they fit together nicely in this sort of collaborative effort. The montage is charming, though I think it could stand a little more narrative structure. I recognize the efforts were allocated to somethig that didn't pan out, but I'll still note that we wind up at the (very cool looking) guardian in a slightly disjointed manner. tThe continuation of the more casual snippets, relationship venting, bonfire kindling (?), makes me stumble from the build up of his flight just before. I think the ending would've be fine without the meta commentary.

Ash (V) - Nice illustrations. Pretty straightforward plot, but it's neat. Similar sort of chemistry between the two, again quite charming. I think it could flow a bit more between the points of conflict, but the fights are nicely executed, and their cooperation is fun. Nice work.


Saki (V) - I can't believe Betsie went to hell, what sins does this cow bear. Great work. Really funny stuff, the signature lewd elements work quite nicely here. Atta's triumphant return now finally in her lane, moisturized and flourshing, was awesome. Really strong cameo here, same with Del Fuego, fitting for the character's context, relatable for the audience, nicely done. The plot itself is goofy, but quite sensible, and Aki's airheaded but very effective methods are fun to watch. Nice artwork too, some excellent expressions.

Lotte - Loving the effort here dude, very ambitious. It's a pretty funny contrast to have these goofy character play out the events of the eclipse, Bucket as Casca is great. I think sticking to closely with the reference makes it a bit harder to stick with in the context of CRAB, but it makes for a pretty entertaining read nonetheless. Neat to see Paulus again. Nice job.


Maple (V) - It's a bit reminiscient a fever dream, but there are some pretty snazzy drawings in it. I can somewhat gather the plot, and there's good bits of humor nestled in there, but I'll admit it's hard for me to clearly follow. I can tell they're somehow competing to out-succ the other, apparently through some demonic escort/brothel process. A bit abstract. Hot cat though.

17ling - Surprisingly cute drawings, despite 17ling's rather uh, vulgar demeanor. I enjoyed the build up, your extreme approach to characterization is pretty funny, and I like the balls to the wall challenge. But it feels cut short. Would've liked to see what transpires until the puppet returns, even if it's a complete downward spiral and adventure through the gutter.


Trixxy - Awesome, tits, violence, and a heart-touching end. Pretty cool work, I like the way you've presented Ocho here, and the mad-maxy heist-like plot to turn on the waterworks. Fun to see Trixxy in action. Curious choice of attire, I wonder who picked it out. Would've been cool to see more rabbit personality, but I can appreciate her firepower regardless.

Ocho (V) - Hilarious, Ocho is peak gob. Love the wackiness right out of the gate, and how your depiction of Trixxy, looks great. Nice callback to the team as well, and the interesting link to Del Fuego. His onion bomb is killer. I think the dialogue could be a bit less casual, it's funny at times but drags a bit for me behind the visuals and gags being expressed. Big on Grug Light too. Nice job.


Jev - Jev radio! Love these two. Another match where they have really nice chemistry, despite the friction. Very nice art, love the range of characters and the environments. Adorable Clarity too, think you handled her quite nicely and her weirdness. Jev's great too, he really balances traits from your prior characters quite nicely, love his personability combined with competence. Neat expanse of the setting, from time in the case to their trek across hell. Fun to see Houndclops return, here to save the day. Nice story, and a charming partnership, great job.

Clartiy (V) - Incredibly sweet. I can't get enough of her antics. And when paired with Jev to bounce off of, it really works well. I love the gags you've got here, from Clarity's bizarre predicament, that posture bent over in the hole is just killing me, to her juggling and lack of sense when facing the beast. I like the adverturing aspect here again too, and the time we get to spend with two very pleasing characters. I could read tons of this.


Captain Cheddar - Nice work, Cap is goofy character and shines nicely here. I like the approach to the challenge, and the fakeout we get as Kabloouie gets to the rope. I think you did a decent job with Kabloouie, but she could get a little more of her own voice. Overall, the way Cap stumbles his way to victory is great, very fitting, and I look forward to what other interesting powers he manifests next.

Kabloouie (V) - Really cool stuff, I like the visuals quite a bit here. Nice coloring, and great take on Captain Cheddar. Also got a kick out of Kabloouie's frazzled compressed form. Would've been neat to see a power for Cap, but I think you nailed his unusual cheese-like personality. The interpretation of the challenge is also pretty interesting, I enjoyed how it takes an indrect but very entertaining route with the phrase. Good humor throughout, with a fun ending as the good intentions go awry. I'm sure he'll be just fine though, being made of cheese it probably happens more frequently than you'd expect.


Foxglove - Slick art, and good fun getting to see Foxglove being a psycho. The devil tediously pestering Cooler to sin is great, and it's a neat design as well. I like how he's just endlessly walking in the wastes being harassed since he isn't quite a damned soul yet. Foxglove being off in her own world with regard to the teams is fitting, both she and Cooler feel quite natural here. Pretty fun conclusion too with the devil just blasting them all to ash, poor Cooler, man just wanted a glass of water. Nice work.

Cooler (V) - Hilarious, I dig Cooler's single-minded pursuit and absolute lack of game. Luckily he's got the coolest kid in town to wingman for him. Really enjoyed this, art's great (sexy liddell....), but just really funny. I think you handled all the characters included pretty nicely, and the introduction of the theme was seamless to your own character premise it starts off with. Seeing this dorky dude stumbling into this wild situation and being this mix of a straightman and catalyst for something stupid to happen to him is perfect. Foxglove's marriage contract to the devil is excellent too. Super fun. Great work.



Bench:

Pier / Conquest - Funny stuff. Kind of amusing to just casually have Snow give out a cell number, and Del Fuego to call in. Lots of good gags throughout, Pier's unfamiliarity with horses is great, and his despair at having his one and only known horse exploded via ion cannon is hilarious. Also really enjoyed him just murdering the delivery demon, wonder where he got the holy water. Nice stuff. Wacky as ever.

Steel / War - Super cool, the 3D works well, and the war horse chibi is fantastic. Really liked it slapping those demons about. Has a nice meme-y video feeling.


Cali / Famine - Awesome, really clever way to go about "finding" the horse. Love her review and acceptance of the final spec, very warioware esque bouncing of that flex. The new horse of famine looks sick. Cali's great.


Agent Snow / Death - Nice format choice, I think it's a much more effective way to join your music and comic work. The music itself is pretty solid, suits the action/setting nicely. Pretty developed story, I like it. Though I'm left wondering where she got the violin. I find the story beats interesting, although they do feel a little stilted for me, like we're getting to these sort of intense or otherwise emotional moments without enough related build up. What they're going for is neat, but don't hit as strongly for me when it feels like we're jumping to the payoff, and at times feel melodramatic due to the abrupt character reactions. Which also reminds me of a completely unrelated to this entry confusion I had about the pit entry, where she appears to summon an idolon despite supposedly not being able to yet? Presumably a misinterpretation somewhere on my end, but feels like a similar, jumping to an intense moment without the lead up. Aside from these quibbles, enjoyable overall. Good work.


Gato / Assemble the Horsemen - Slick illustrations. Pier standing on his horse is killer, but I like all of them quite a bit. Did all the characters justice.


Admiral Pizza / Help Virgil Find Dante - Ah, the definition of hell, an absence of pizza. Nice illustration, really fun references that are presetend well. Dig steel here. Solid work Admiral.