Pokemon Waifus
OH! You’re awake! Ummm, I have something to tell you… I may have accidentally pulled you out of your universe and into mine… Please don’t worry! I’ve got some people I can pull some favours with and find you a place to live with one of my friends, but I have no idea how I got you here, so you can’t go back. I’m so, so, sorry. You must be missing home so much… Um, but here, let me give you a description of the friends I have. They even writ you letters, if that makes things easier?


Curly
Curly can be… strange. Her emotions are influenced by others, especially ones she’s bonded with. If you’re happy, she’ll be almost deleriously happy, dancing and singing. If you’re sad, she stops talking and becomes very apathetic. If you’re scared, she’ll protect you wildly before breaking down in tears. And if you’re angry, whatever or whoever angered you will be damaged, along with pretty much everything in a five-mile area.

Alone, she’s pretty cold and withdrawn, though very clingy. She’s nervous around new people, and prefers to be alone. She’s less shy and more antisocial. She’s actually a sweetheart under her cold exterior. She enjoys dancing and her ballet is truely hypnotic. She loves to make routines to new songs. Trust me, if you haven’t seen her ballet dance to an expletive-ridden rap song, you haven’t lived.

Romance wise, take it slow and take it sweet. She’d prefer to have a date inside the house than outside as she prefers to be around less people. She’ll likely maintain her cold exterior but her actions will be very much warm, if you know what I mean. She has a bit of a foot fetish. How do I know this? Hehe, I have my reasons…

Her job is, predictibly, as a ballet dancer. She gains quite a good living, and lives in a comfy large apartment. You’ll sleep in the guest room, most likely. She’s a prodigy, at 18, and she’s short at 4’7. She has the nicest feet of all of my friends! What? That’s not a weird thought to have about a friend, shut up!

Here’s her letter:

Hello. My name is Curly. I have heard it is a strange name, but I like it. I will need to lay down a rule if you want to stay with me. If I withdraw into my bedroom, don’t follow me. It means I need time to myself. If I ever want you in my room, I will ask you to follow. I asked for you as a roomate as I wanted a companion for when I’m alone in the house. Take that as you will. My guest room is a bit plain but I’m sure I’ll be able to fix something up. If you wish, I could teach you how to dance. I would enjoy if you showed me songs you liked, so I could make a dance routine just for you. My mother may be over on the weekends. She’s… very nice? She likes to flirt a lot. It is very embarrasing, and she does not realise her actions make me feel (there is a lot of the letter crossed out here). You might need to be prepared. Even if you do not become my roomate, can we keep in touch? I don’t have much friends.


Mimi
Mimi is probably actually my best friend. I’m the only one to have seen her true form and- well, a girl must have her secrets. But, let me tell you, you’ll be very suprised!

Mimi is friendly and doggedly loyal. She’d fling herself off a cliff if you asked her to. The only thing she won’t do is reveal her true form, and I can certainly see why. She’s positively adorable and her voice has an ethereal tinge to it. She enjoys reading and talking to her imaginary friends. She’ll surely enjoy what you enjoy though. She’s actually incredibly shy, though she’ll likely try and hide it around you. She’s good at singing, and has a gorgeous voice.

A romance with Mimi will be almost pitifully easy. Just ask her and she’ll try her best to be the best girlfriend she can. Don’t expect physical intimacy, at least at first. That would require showing her true form, and she knows enough about others of her kind to know showing you it might kill you from shock. Eventually, you’ll be able to get her to show you her true form. It would be horrifying at first, but it’ll certainly be an unique experience,

Mimi doesn’t work, as she does not require sustenance, and she lives in an abandoned manor in the middle of a forest all alone. It’s surrounded by delicious edible Berries and a beautiful river stream able to be drank from safely, don’t worry. Mimi is about 17, and is the smallest of the girls at 4’1. Is the cutest of all my friends! If you don’t date her, I might end up dating her!

Here’s her letter:

Hi! I am Mimi! I would love you to live with me. I don’t have many friends and I would love to be your friend. I often feel very lonely, so I would love more friends. I will try and make this place more habitable for you, OK? I’m not used to visitors. I’ll get you whatever you’d like, if you want. Hey, even if you don’t choose me… please come and visit once in a while, ok? It gets lonely in here with noone here. There are some people in the forest but I feel far too nervous to talk with them… Please, won’t you be friends with me? Love Mimi!


Kanna
Kanna is a single mother. If becoming a parent to her child scares you off, you won’t want her. She’s also a skilled fighter, if you could belive it. She was a prominent League fighter for a while! Wait, you don’t have a League in your world? Essentially, it’s a legislated system for fights, best known for the annual challenging of the strongest trainers, though it’s not just that. You’ll find out soon enough, anyway. Her daughter is called Hannah, by the way.

Kanna is very boisterous and excitable. She’s always excited for a fight, though she’s concerned enough for Hannah to keep it down. She’s always very motherly, very kind and patient in emotional manners. She’s a mean cook, and has a meaner Mega Punch. Hannah is actually very shy and rarely talks, and seems level-headed for such a youngster.

Romance wise, you’ll have to be a great father to Hannah to get to Kanna. She’ll be as motherly as she is to Hannah. She’ll prefer to spend nights with you than on dates. Kanna’s into impregnation, unsuprisingly.

Kanna works at a daycare, and doesn’t earn a lot, and lives in a small house in a rural area. You’ll have to sleep on the couch for a bit. Kanna is 33 and a tall 6’1, whereas Hannah is 3 and only 2’7. Kanna has the thickest thighs of all my friends.

Here’s her letter:

Hail, stranger! I’m gonna cut to the chase a bit, but I’m expecting for ya to help care for Hannah. If that don’t interest ya, then ya don’t interest me. I don’t have a bed for ya right now, so ya’ll have to sleep on the couch. Unless ya want ta sleep with me? Oh Arceus, I phrased that wrong. I don’t have a lot, but I would apreciate some help. Hannah wanted to say she would love to meet ya, by the way. We can still be friends if ya don’t want to live with me, a’course. I’ll be very busy, though.


Lianna
Ok, this one might be a bit out there. Lianna is a psychopomp. Others of her persuasion tend to use their ability to manipulate souls to empower themselves at the expense of stealing others souls, but Lianna decided to use her powers for good and help guide dead souls to the world of the spirits.

Lianna is very old, and generally can come off as quite apathetic, as she’s seen most things before. She puts on a calm, friendly facade but on the inside she’s tired. So very tired. She just wants to feel whole again. She doesn’t really have any hobbies, and spends all her time off the job sleeping. She gets incredibly angry if you bring up her general weakness. Apparently, when she was young she was cheerful and polite to a fault. She’s a bit of an alchoholic

If you want romance, you’ll have to get her able to feel again. If you do, she’ll be an attentive and warm lover, and hopelessly loyal. She’s not strong, but she’s suprisingly durable. You’ll have to find out kinks on your own, sorry.

She works as a psychopomp, and has a small apartment in the afterlife, which is essentially the world of the living but much more comfy. You will have to enter the world of the dead to stay with her, and while she can leave you won’t be able to. You’ll have the most comfy bed you can imagine, though, if that helps. She’s actually nearly 500, and is only 4’5. Is the widest hipped of all of my friends.

Here’s her letter:

Hello, stranger. I am Lianna, and it is very nice to meet you. Well, write to you, haha. I would love to be friends with you but I won’t have time much if you don’t choose to live with me. It’s totally OK if you don’t want to essentially die, I- actually, I don’t understand. I am trying to be friendly but it is hard. I would love for you to live in the afterworld with me. I will try and get you anything you want. Just please, please, please choose me. I’m so lonely. I just want a goddamn friend but thats too much to ask for apparently. Everyone in the afterlife never understands how hard it is to deal with newly dead spirits. it’s so damn exausting and I just don’t feel anything anymore and I just want to know what happiness feels like and that’s just too much and (the rest is completely undecipherable)

Ignore the rambling in my previous lines. I was very drunk.


Ariana
Yes, Ariana is a girl. Don’t imply anything else, it’s a sore spot for her and you don’t want to be on her bad side. She’s completely silent when she moves, can walk on walls and holds grudges. On top of this, she’s a master of poisons and can enwrap you rapidly with her spider web. She won’t kill someone she likes, but expect to spend a few days deleriously sick.

Ariana is generally silent and cold on the exterior to most people. This ruse is very quickly broken once she starts to like you. In truth, she’s kinda brash and loud-mouthed. She’s a complete tomboy, and… how do I say this… a total tsundere. She’ll be quite mean to you, but when she realizes she’s gone too far she’ll be almost creepily helpful and kind until you feel better. She’s self concious about her androgynous appearance. She doesn’t really have much morals, to be quite honest. Don’t tell her I said that.

Romance with Ariana will be very… difficult. She’ll never lose her tsundere streak, though you can lessen it as time goes on. She’ll enjoy going outside in nature for dates, or anywhere she can dress up and look feminine. Hugely into bondage (whether it’s you or her in bondage depends on her mood), and she can use poisons for… various effects.

Ariana used to work as an assassin. I managed to get her to stop that (pretending I was worried about her getting caught), and now she gains money through Leauge fighting. She’s decently skilled at getting in a sneaky victory, and she has a healthy amount of money. She lives in a very small, messy apartment she calls “The Hole”, and she expects you to share a bed with you. She’s 21, and is 5’1. Has the harshest glare out of any of my friends.

Here’s her letter:

So she managed to screw up and kidnap you here? Ugh, I’m not suprised, she’s useless. Out of the kindness of my own heart, I’ve decided to let you stay in The Hole with me. I expect you’ll sleep with me. Not in that way, you pervert! Really, think about someone in your own leauge. You better choose me. Not that I want you to or anything! Geez, how are you so annoying? I haven’t even met you yet!


Eva
Eva is really weak for now, but she’s changing quickly and growing much stronger. It’s influenced by those around her and her surroundings, and she will eventually end up with elemental powers related to them. She grows firey around hotheaded people and hot enviroments, watery around relaxed people and beaches, electric around energetic people and urban enviroments, psychic around friendly people and bright enviroments, darker around people with less morals and dark enviroments, icey around stoic people and snowy enviroments, earthy around staple people and jungles, and fey-like around playful people and odd enviroments.

Eva is optimistic and friendly. She’ll regard you as a sibling-figure, and protect you with her life. She’ll be almost overly clingy and protective, but her relationship will be purely sisterly on her part unless you sway her another way. She’s a big eater and can seemingly eat anything. She’s mute, but I can teach you sign language before you go if you want.

If you try and romance her before she comes of age I will cut you. If she’s of age, I don’t mind, but I can’t give you advice until I know how she’ll react to romantic advances.

Eva doesn’t have a job, and lives in a small cave. It’s not a home, but it’s comfy enough. You’ll have a seperate bed, with tons of pillows, She’s 13, and is currently 4’2, but will grow. Is the most innocent of my friends.

Here’s her letter:

Hello New Friend. Please be friends with me and live with me please? Even if you don’t want to be friends please play with me sometimes. From Eva (Your new little sister!)


Me?
So you want to stay with me? Um… I wasn’t planning for this…

Ok. My name is Palkia, but just call me Kia, please! I’m, um, the diety of space. Look, I’m normally better than this! It’s just my sister, Dia, ended up really distracting me (I don’t really understand time, but don’t tell anyone!) and I got distracted and, um, tore you away from your space in the multiverse. I have no idea where I got you from so, I can’t put you back…

I would describe myself as very apologetic. I’ve had people describe me as a bit emotional, and sometimes they call me nice. Dia calls me naive and a goody two shoes. I don’t like Dia very much. We used to be great friends, but Dia was always too harsh for her own good. I’m pretty relaxed, and I like interacting with the mortals.

I can introduce you to some of the other dieties later if you want. I mean, you don’t have to choose me for me to do it! I just want to be nice… If you want, I can try and date you? It might not work out, but I’m willing to try. I like slow and relaxed relationships, if that helps. Feel free to do whatever you want to my body. Whatever you want. I’m a god, I’ll be fine. I don’t have any fetishes but I’m up for anything.

I enjoy games of all kinds. Video games, tabletop games, roleplaying. I also enjoy singing and tinkering with technology. I’m willing to try anything you want, OK? I might like it, so I’m 100% OK with it. As long as it makes you feel better.

I kinda live in a sort of void without space. I’ll be able to get you somewhere to sleep, but you’ll have to get used to it. I’ve heard people say it’s confusing at first. I’m older than you could comprehend, and height wise I am 7 foot tall.

Are you sure you want to stay with me?