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  1. //
  2. /pol/'s Eminem diss track
  3. //
  4.  
  5. link:
  6. https://vocaroo.com/i/s1HewB3nAt7j
  7. https://vocaroo.com/i/s1HewB3nAt7j
  8. https://vocaroo.com/i/s1HewB3nAt7j
  9.  
  10. [Comprised entirely of shitposts made by multiple anons, recorded by rapanon--who added his own verse. First part mocks both Eminem's perceived decay of quality, by 'roasting Trump' better than he did; and generally shits on Eminem's weak bars. The rest is /pol/ dissing Eminem outright. References made to Eminem's prior fights with rap artists Benzino, Ja Rule, Whitey Ford, and ICP as well as material from Eminem's first EP, "Infinite," poking fun at Marshall for entirely losing his grip on his position as a polemical rapper. Most of the track parodies Slim Shady's style--which Eminem has been either trying to recover, or at times struggling to move beyond unsuccessfully for the last 20 years of his wack career.]
  11.  
  12. lyrics:
  13. _post 1
  14. hey mister racist--
  15. your face is orange and bloated
  16. and I’m damn glad that I voted
  17. for Hillary Clinton
  18. because I respect women, black people, and Jews
  19. unlike you
  20. Hitler number two
  21. everything they said about you was true
  22. you a bigot Trump, you gotta go
  23. disrespecting women--Antifa says hell no
  24.  
  25. _post 2
  26. Trump
  27. more like Drumpf
  28. or more like Blumpf
  29. that dude looks like a Flumpf
  30. yo call him Mr Stumpf
  31. I take it back, Colbert calls him Gumpf
  32. oh shit it’s Mr Zumpf
  33. woke up looking like a Pumpf
  34. with a big bag of cumpf
  35. so go and tell President Vumpf
  36. we don’t need another Lumpf
  37. peace.
  38.  
  39. _post 3
  40. hol up hol up
  41. my name is Marshall Mathers
  42. always-was-a-muslim Mathers
  43. halal spaghetti, and blathers
  44. Trump is not a democrat
  45. so I’m gonna make a rap--
  46. just stand back while I slap him with an object
  47. and make it rhyme like... l-like a bobject
  48.  
  49. _post 4
  50. real men listen to motorhead
  51. sunrise, wrong side of another day
  52. sky high, and six thousand miles away
  53. don’t know how long I’ve been awake
  54. wound up in an amazing state
  55. can’t get enough and you know it’s righteous stuff
  56. goes up like prices at Christmas
  57. motorhead, you can call me motorhead, alright--
  58. braindead, total amnesia
  59. get some mental anesthesia
  60. don’t move, I’ll shut the door and kill the lights
  61. and if I can be wrong I could be right
  62. all good clean fun
  63. have another stick of gum
  64. man, you look better already,
  65. motorhead, remember me now motorhead, alright
  66. fourth day, five day marathon
  67. we're moving like a parallelogram,
  68. don't move, I'll shut the door and kill the lights
  69. I guess I'll see you all on the ice,
  70. I should be tired and all I am is wired,
  71. ain't felt this good in an hour
  72.  
  73. _post 5
  74. yo--
  75. Donald Trump
  76. you are such a chump
  77. what do you say
  78. when I come here today
  79. to do an exposé
  80. on how I saw you yesterday
  81. at the gay parade
  82. I'm glad that you’re a homo
  83. cause the Bible says that’s a no no
  84. and now you're gonna go to hell
  85. hope your stay isn't so well
  86. maybe you’ll learn a lesson or two on not bein so snarky
  87. towards the former president who is a darkie
  88.  
  89. _post 6
  90. Drumpf
  91. he a coward
  92. he ain’t shit
  93. he's a cow turd
  94. get this man outta office
  95. fake news is his last word
  96. I gots a bone to pick
  97. with a racist prick
  98. no wall gonna stop this sick
  99. flow of Hispanics
  100. all we know is, Putin in ya back pockets
  101. stop tryna flex on Kim Jong with ya whack rockets
  102. let our Madam take charge,
  103. take the L you quitter--
  104. and on the way out just
  105. make another dumb post on Twitter
  106.  
  107. _rapanon's verse
  108. ok, alright, alright let me find my flow real quick--
  109. now it’s Anon's turn to take over the beat, leaving
  110. Eminem keeled over and weak and on his knees
  111. with his pants around his ankles--frankly,
  112. I’m just a little bit unstable
  113. probably a hair away from turning tables
  114. over white niggers like Marshall, awful
  115. it’s target practice, lawfully
  116. lighting up some wigger’s career
  117. in the parking deck; hoodie, over only his ears
  118. brings a tear to my eye
  119. crew behind him for hype--
  120. cause he’s too far past his fucking prime to write
  121. half decent-ass fucking punchlines
  122. parroting every whack faggot on Twitter, bitter
  123. the niggers behind him all just activists on the shitter,
  124. literally stomping like teenagers
  125. hasn’t worked for a wage in over three decades, thinking
  126. he’s got his pulse on the underdog’s labors--
  127. like he speaks for us?
  128. bus that shit, faggot
  129. you can’t step to touch on us--
  130. like John Podesta’s torture bus
  131. I'll leave you slathered in pizza sauce
  132. Marshall Mathers, whack little bastard
  133. long gone are the days you ruled diss tracks--
  134. and blew back jackasses
  135. from Benzino to Ja Rule,
  136. Whitey Ford and paintballed
  137. those clown faggots
  138. I’m done with you
  139. leaving my nuts in the back of your old 90’s tracer
  140. That’s still sitting at Kinko’s, where you left it for Dre
  141.  
  142. _intermission
  143. ayo hol up hol up hol up
  144. /pol/'s not done, we still got some more shit to say
  145.  
  146. _post 7
  147. coffee pot, coffee pot
  148. hot coffee, that's not
  149. coffee in my coffee pot
  150. my name is Marshall, and
  151. I got a coffee pot--bought
  152. it at Wal-Mart and almost dropped
  153. it in the parking lot
  154. coffee caught, before it landed
  155. Trump hardens my cock
  156. he wrote the Art of the Deal, but
  157. I wrote the Art of the Coffee Pot
  158. jerk off my coffee cock
  159. till I get off my pot
  160. I don't smoke pot unless it's made of coffee, but
  161. it's largely not--
  162. used to listen to Bob Marley
  163. now I just listen to my coffee pot
  164. built a robot out of coffee, call it a coffee bot
  165. laughed so hard I got coffee snot
  166. runnin out of my nose, but it landed in the coffee spot
  167. got a walkie-talkie, now I'm talking with my coffee pot
  168. but hey Trump--coffee pot!
  169.  
  170. that shit's awfully hot...
  171.  
  172. _post 8
  173. I'ma walk inside a mosque on Ramadan And
  174. let the bullets off
  175. cause 9/11 wan an insi--
  176. oh-- oh ... I’ma stop
  177. I’ma stop
  178. gun reform for Nevada?
  179. are those the same guns you were on probation for havin--African
  180. soliders were never told to go back, and
  181. I remember watching Villanueva stand for the flag
  182. he didn't kneel like a faggot
  183. for the national anthem and twist facts,
  184. that Michael Brown was throwing his hands up
  185. stop throwing a tantrum
  186. you sound like a bitch--
  187. mad the border wall is stopping all of you and your friends
  188. from smuggling bricks
  189. enter a mosque for a prayer
  190. don't be surprised when they behead you for shaving your beard
  191. or throw you off the roof for being a queer
  192. yeah, your agenda is clear:
  193. you pander to blacks so you can make a little cash
  194. off your next shitty track
  195. how disgusting is that?
  196. Trump ain't as stingy as you
  197. he funded himself, homie, you were funded by Jews
  198. making us choose, between the POTUS and you?
  199. we voted for him, ain't nobody fucking voting for you
  200.  
  201. _post 9
  202. hey, give Eric the mic
  203. comp that shit
  204. hey Steve, bump that shit
  205. make mom mad rich
  206. me too--so I can chomp jap fish
  207. drain the swamp, stomp that bitch
  208. automatic Paddock, King Kong's rap bitch--
  209.  
  210. _post 10
  211. I gotta question, Em:
  212. What happened to your rapping, now you're PC?
  213. I bet that'll make some sales on your next CD
  214. actually, naw, this whole edition gets the frisbee
  215. like when Mickey played catch with Pluto on Disney
  216. you used to say words like faggot constantly--
  217. you understood it then--what, now you don't get the content?
  218. that a faggot and a homosexual are not the same thing?
  219. I think all that Xanax might have gone straight to your brain
  220.  
  221. _post 11
  222. hey guys! hi! My name is Eminem
  223. and I’d like to introduce my butt-hole to... um...
  224. him... and him... and him--hello,
  225. nice to meet you, let yourself in
  226. here’s my email--
  227. find a shemale
  228. and we'll try to do this again
  229. bring a friend
  230. my rear-end will give you a grin
  231. let's begin
  232. stick it in
  233. again, again, and again, and again
  234. [again and again, and again and]
  235.  
  236. _post 12
  237. You know, here’s the fucking problem, you see cause
  238. Marshall done changed lanes
  239. virtue-signalling lyrical chain-gangs
  240. like a dead-lifter with no gains
  241. like Dracula without no fucking fangs--
  242. you might as well go celibate
  243. you're just scared of losing your relevance
  244. it’s obvious via the evidence
  245. evidently you’re not an elephant
  246. you done fucked up like Icarus
  247. unlike Icarus, you’re meticulous
  248. your wax wings look fucking stupid
  249. like furry-Gucci ridiculous
  250. so, lick on this dick a bit
  251. you’re fake
  252. you’re an opportunist, you bitch--
  253. go cry about how Kim divorced you, or some shit
  254. and get rich
  255.  
  256. _rapanon's last punchline
  257. but how rich is this, bitch?
  258. I’m just some nobody in my bedroom
  259. doing what you do better'n you done it
  260. in ten years
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