Thread 55: Stories 1-15

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~~~

It was a morning like any other, you'd think it the same. A cracking back and a groan with mumbles of aimless blame. For it was a changeling who let out this grumbling moan. Could be any of them all, just another aimless drone. He rose to stand with his eyes barely seeing. Memories of fanciful dreams from his head all fleeing. He stumbled about this way and that. He could not stand stand straight, as steady as a gnat.

It was in this drunken wobble that he stumbled across it first. His hoof pushed down on something soft, and he feared the worst. But it was no foul thing upon which he did stomp. For what greeted his eyes made his heart positively tromp.

"My hive, come look!!" He shouted in shock. Eyes snapped open, and one by one they all did gawk.

The creatures of changelings all gathered around. To the edge of the ballroom, the opposite of where they stared upon an awe inspiring mound.

"It can't be! It has to be a trick!" Another cried, giving it a light kick.

But the stacks before him remained just as it had, no change at all. The objects before the group stacked high, threatening to fall.

"Was it the Queen?" One asked the group.

"She's still unconscious!" Said another, thrown for a loop.

"Was it the princess?" One wondered, the thought springing to his mind.

"They're out too!" Said his brother, smacking him with a hoof unkind.

"It can't be from the ponies, they would never do this for us!"

"But who could it be? There was no fuss or muss!"

They all shared a look, and it dawned on them all. Somehow, someway, someone had been within this very wall. They reeled in shock as their minds were blown. They, the changelings, had an intruder, and none had known. The sneakiest of all things had been slipped right past. As silent and as precise as it had been fast.

But they had not been harmed, no things taken away. No, for the very first time, a new thing had come this day.

Many new things, to more precise. So many new things, when few would suffice.

"A note!" One cried, rushing forward past the rest. He found a slip of paper nearly unseen, tucked away where it would nest.

"To those who need it, so you may know you are not alone... a gift for this time, for every soldier, infiltrator and drone..."

A silence fell upon, as cold as a wake. Looking upon it, they did not know how much they could take.

"This is for us." Came a voice from the back.

"For us..." Said another, his chitin growing a little less black.

They could hold it no longer, and all rushed forwards with a cheer. They dove in straight forwards, no longer with a shred of fear.

"Our stuff! Our stuff! Our stuff came back!" They cried as one! "Our sleeping bags, our games" Oh what fun!

"A chair for the one who needed to sit!"

"And a dartboard with which to make every hit!"

"A plant for the ones who love to see things grow!"

"And so many film reels, we can finally watch our show!"

"A simple thing to keep us off the cold ground!"

They jumped, they laughed, merriment was abound!

"But who brought these amazing gifts?"

As one to the note did their attention drift.

"There is no name, just the words I said."

As one, things began to spin in their head.

"How did they slip past us? How didn't we see?"

"Maybe, just maybe... they were smaller than a flea?"

"No! They must have had a lightning speed like the wind!"

"Or maybe they still stand before us now, but our sight they can bend!"

"No pony could do this, it simply cannot be done."

"Were it a princess, you know they would say they were the one."

"So what brought these things, our stuff returned at last?"

"Maybe, just maybe... it's something neither small, invisible or fast."

"...You can't mean that old tale, it's just a Queen's joke!"

But even as he said it, with uncertainty he spoke.

"The crimson spirit is a myth, a joke used to scare a grub!"

But his words died when another gasped, and his hoof began to rub.

"Look!" He cried with horror as he turned the note on it's back.

There, for all to see... was a red streak, all along a perfect track.

The room went silent as it all sank in.

But this silence fell away, and they all did grin.

"The spirit is real!" One screeched with glee.

"He brought us our stuff!" Said another, smile wide as the sea.

"We thank you Crimson spirit for what you have brought! And we praise you your skills, you were not caught!"

The things were passed out, no greed to be had. Evenly for everyone, be they good or bad. This feeling of cheer and goodwill felt like it would never end. Not today, not tomorrow, as if it were their godsend.

But away from the group, two were tucked hidden in dark. They had not stirred, no matter how loud or rancorous the lark. They snored softly, their task long done. They need not things, let others have their fun.

How this pair had pulled off their greatest trick? That is a story for another time, for we must be quick.

For the party has reached full swing, and it will not stop soon. Just know that they need no thanks, require no boon.

For in this time, they come to find, there are some things more important, but never you mind.

Let them have their merriment, let them cheer and give their very best! For these two unsung heroes... all they want is a little rest.

"...Wow, what lazy jerks."

"Yeah, seriously."

"...Wanna draw stuff on them-""YES!"

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NC parody

>Screws
"Highroller"
'12'
______

As Twelve fiddled with the complicated set of restraints on the back of Screwloose's jacket, even Snake Eyes felt a bit of apprehension at the thought of that manic mare being freed.

And it was a thought that was fast becoming a terrible reality.

'Almost... alllllmost...'

"Heeeey, you know what, maybe we should leave that fashion statement on until we're back at the-"

Click.

Fwump.

"..."

'...'

The two stallions watched in silence as Screwloose took to rotating each of her woefully sore arms, her neck rolling this way and that with a series of relieving snaps.

Then her eyes flared and she ran a hoof through her tussled mane, those lips curling up into a device smirk.

>Now... I'm free. There are... no strings on me.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>55
"???"
~~~~

The flight home had been the fastest he had ever gone. To the point he had to make multiple stops to 'refuel' and recharge. Coincidentally, most of those stops just happened to be close to places he needed to check up on. The orphanage, which he had to help them fix their front gate after some infected tried to break it down, Wheatcrackers farm, which needed to get the debris cleared off so his planted seeds could grow again, Cherry Jubilee's business, the rest station's roof... he made a lot of stops.

So many, when he finally reached that quiet, nice looking town, the fires he had placed to hold them in were long since extinguished.

They waved to him as he flew overhead, everyone looking normal now just as they should. Some had some traces of ash, but in the dusty town such as this it was hardly even noticeable. Buildings had been repaired in a flash, earth pony ingenuity at its finest, and things looked... normal, as strange as that sounded. They didn't need him anymore, not right now.

It was with a heavy heart a flash of memory returned to him, reminding him of when he left in the first place.

He didn't want to look as he floated to the ground, 'hiding' in an alleyway so nobody would see it was him before putting on his 'disguise' and sneaking out. There wasn't much he could do, he realized, he was just going to have to hope something survived, and see if he could find a porch to sleep under...

>...No... way...

He couldn't believe his eyes. He couldn't process what he was looking at. He couldn't think, couldn't breath, couldn't do anything.

Anything but smile.

>NO! WAY!

Smile and grab onto the side of that beautiful, beautiful sight.

>MAGIC SHACK! YOU'RE ALIVE!

His ragged tail wagged as he rubbed his cheek against the cool wood and metal, a grin a mile wide on his face.

>You must've used your magic to fix yourself! Oh, Magic Shack, I was so worried I wasn't going to see you again!

He flung the door open, and sure enough there it all was. His paint cans, the letters he couldn't read from 18, even his blanket! His blanket was okay!

>BLANKET!

He dove headfirst into his pile, practically swimming in his gas cans as he dragged the cloth all over his face.

>You're okay too!... and you smell GREAT! I didn't like that Fungee anyway, I don't care what those fancy ponies say! Oh, thank you Magic Shack! You're the best!

"Fifty Five?"

The voice made him freeze, pausing in his loving of all that he thought had been lost.

He let out a slow, sad breath before he stood up again, carefully putting the blanket back where it belonged before he took the two steps necessary to cross from one side of his shack to the other, and gently pushed open the door.

The face on the other side made him feel smaller than he ever had in his entire life. That red hair upon her head still held traces of grey within it, but she was smiling... he wasn't.

Right now, he felt like he wouldn't smile ever again.

>I'm sorry...

She tilted her head, smile fading away into a confused frown.

>I tried to make it back... but I wasn't fast enough. You got turned into... I couldn't do anything but try to go get help... and I didn't even do that...

He had never felt more horrible in his life than he had right now. He hadn't been able to save anyone of his friends, or her. He had failed...

"...You're so silly."

She playfully reached out, bopping him on the nose.

"If you hadn't thrown up that fire, we probably would be scattered everywhere from here to Manehatten and back! Who knows how many would've gotten taken in the desert."

He looked no better after that, and they both knew why.

>...But I wasn't fast enough...

She smiled.

That wonderful, beautiful, perfect smile that always, always made him feel like he could hold up the whole planet by himself.

"Well... maybe next time, I just need to be a little closer."

She stepped over the threshold, and Fifty Five felt his brain shorting out.

"I heard you, you know... I don't know how, but I know that when you said those things... I heard you."

His mouth suddenly became dry, and his eyes wide as saucers. Nobody else had remembered anything, he had even asked about that, but she heard when he offered to...

At this point, his quite slow brain was having the most trouble it ever had in his whole life.

>...You wanna play stack the cans?

It was honestly the best he could come up with.

The look on her face said it was perfect.

"...I would love that."

There would be time to talk to the others later, to get his thanks from the whole town and so on, but that would all have to wait. For the door was shut, and for just a brief moment in time, that shack... really was magic.

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>Twilight
"Celestia"
'???'
~~~

>FINALLY!

With one final slap, the newly repaired, pristine thing before her hummed to life. A charge from her horn was all it took, and before she knew it she was greeted with a swirling, magical wave before her.

A head poked through the veil, that of a crystal pony guard. With a smile and a nod, he confirmed all was well, and then pulled back.

>The portal to the empire is back to normal!

"Oh, thank goodness. That took forever to dig out."

>Took even longer to fix...

"Yes, well, try not to say that around Spike."

>Ah. He did that?

"..."

>Point taken.

"Shiny had to do a nice little slide to save Cadence and Eighteen, it was quite the show."

>Well, I'll have to ask him when-

'WILL YOU STAY PUT!'

>....
"..."

The magic shimmered once more, and something emerged from the portal before stomping down the hall.

>...
"... Chrysalis?"

A pink headed changeling poked through, a hoof angrily waving in the direction of where the Queen had gone.

'FINE! But when you collapse, don't you call me!... Or Cadence! Or Shiny! Or nobody! Spend time over here, like you're probably SUPPOSED TO!'

>...
"..."

She ducked back in momentarily, before popping back out not a minute later, only she wasn't alone.

>...PJ?

The changeling looked away, embarrassed, before running off. Again, Eighteen's head poked through.

'Neither of you saw that, and if Chrysalis asks she was always here. Good? Good.'

With that, she ducked back in, and the portal closed.

>...
"..."
>...You wanted it open.
"I want a lot of things, Twilight, but they never end well..."

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>Chitania
"Librarian"
'???'
~~~~

>Come on... come on... come on...

At last, the librarian arrived, and stuck her key into the lock.

>FUCKING FINALLY! I didn't realize I was waiting in line like the alleyway leading to a fucking BROODER!

"..."

'Mommy? What's a brooder?'

It should be noted the librarian was not, in fact, alone.

>Brooders are-

"HEY! I don't know what they are, but I'm pretty sure they're not age appropriate!"

>Sure they are, I think they give discounts for kids even.

'YAY!'

"Not yay!"

>Well, not unless they're good at their jobs, no. Then you say you want your money back.

'Awwww, ya' gotta pay them?'

>Of course you do, even mother paid them when she messed up and ordered the female kind by mistake. Just common courtesy. They work hard things, after all.

'Don't ya' mean they work hard?'

>Yeah, that too.

"CAN YOU STOP!?"

>Yes, I could. Do I want to? Not in the least.

"PLEASE!"

>This is what you get for not coming in yesterday! THIS IS WHAT YOU GET!

"I was a zombie! I needed a freaking day off!"

>Oh wah wah wah, you think I took a day off after I bit out a dragons sternum!? No, I got up the next day, and pulled Pyrrharctia right out of that pit of snakes!

"..."

'...What's a sternum?'

"NOTHING!"

>Now don't lie to the child.

"You know what, fine! Just go in! Go in and do what you want to do!"

>HAH! Soon, you fool, you will regret what you have done, you will regret ever letting me in!

"Just go!"

>Do not command me you second rate, homely looking, pencil necked excuse for a washed up meat wrapper! I am going in there, and I WILL-...

There was a long, long pause as she very slowly looked over the books.

The many... many... many... manymanymanymanymany books...

>...Where is the books on...

That smirk said everything.

>...

'Mommy, why does she-'

*POP*

'AHHH! HER EYE JUST POPPED RED!'

The mother had no response for her child.

She just... smiled.

Just a bit.

Slowly, Chitania got started.

It was going to be a long day.

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>Chrysalis
"Various"
~~~

Her mind had been strained on the walk over here. After 18 had revealed earlier that there was not a single item teleported to her bunker, it had dawned on her that the charred remains she saw in the garden must've been that she had worked so very hard for. Their possessions must've been knocked free before Spike set them ablaze.

Worse, with the funding the Empire has been sending out left and right, coupled with the fact they had only had these things for less than a week, it was very, very unlikely, if not impossible, that Shiny would be able to swing getting them a single thing more. Canterlot too would be sinking too much funds into rebuilding and helping its citizens to even dream of giving them a single bit. Their possessions had been taken away, quite brutally at that, and there was nothing more she could do.

She shouldn't have felt bad, really. She warned them to take care of it, warned them they would only get these and nothing else. They hadn't protected them properly, and now they were gone, simple as that. Hell, they should just be happy they were alive. They lived like this their whole lives, why should this moment be any different? Really, they hadn't even had it long enough to really get attached, it shouldn't bother them.

...But damn it, a part of her still felt just a bit of trepidation as she stood outside the door to her ballroom...

>...What in the fuck...

A bit of trepidation that left very, very quickly.

"WHEEEEE!"

"No cutting in line!"

"I haven't even moved!"

"...Oh, sorry, you look like the guy in front of you."

"RACIST!"

"Hey, to whoever left his sleeping bag by the table with the bowls, be warned that it is kind of wobbly."

"MY BABY!"

"Taking all bets, taking all bets! You sir! What're we getting attacked by next?"

"ALIENS!"

"Pfft, play it safe, why don't you."

"I make my bit work for ME!"

"It's bitS for the plural."

"I know..."

"Taking all.... MAJESTY!"

She couldn't deny a bit of pride welling up as they all immediately dropped what they were doing and assembled before her in a straight line, bowing respectfully in reverence.

>Where... where did all of this come from?

One brave one stepped forwards, proudly holding up a note.

"Majesty, you're not going to believe it, the Crimson Spirit is real!"

>...That one guy that rewards drones only if they make their Queen's the happiest in the world?

"Yeah!"

"OUR WORK HAS PAID OFF! We worked extra hard all year!"

""""""YEAH!"""""

>...

A part of her, a very large part, wished to point out that this was, in fact, a blatant lie. A blatant lie her own grandmother had made up to motivate drones to work harder, but never rewarded them because "If they think they're good enough, they won't work harder next year", and thus killed off most her hive by overworking them. There was not only no such thing, none had ever even been given a gift by the false one in history. She should tell them this, really.

But seeing them smile... made it very hard, and she didn't know why.

>Well... good. Is everyone alive and accounted for?

They all enthusiastically nodded.

"Well, everyone except 41, but she was probably hanging out with that one guy."

>...Right.

"Yeah, they like hitting each other! A lot!"

>I'll bet.

"...Oh! And 13's still missing, but a guard said he saw her after the zombies, so it's cool."

>Really now...

Suspiciously, her eye rose. Odd that 13, of all of them, wouldn't return immediately...

"And 77 is still... you know."

She knew, alright. She new perfectly well.

"My Queen... does this mean we uh... we made you happy?"

They all looked to her, hopeful, practically ready to burst with anticipation as she looked over them, each and every one.

>... I have business to attend to.

She smirked at the confusion on their faces, and turned around to leave.

>...Have fun with your stuff, and try not to hurt yourselves.

That, on the other hand, told them everything.

"Yeah! Wouldn't want to end up like JJ!"

A quick glance to the still sleeping Jugglejack told her quite a lot too.

>...Indeed. Try not to set anything on fire.

""""""WE WON'T!"""""""

>Good. Then I am happy.

With that, she left the room, and closed the door, sound of excitement and fun already going off behind her.

And, much to her own surprise, she smiled. She honestly, truly, happily smiled. It had been such a long time since she felt this...

>...Hrpmh. They'll screw it up somehow.

Even as she said this, that smile never left her face.

At least, until she realized she really did have some other business to attend to.

>...Better get this over with...

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>Idris
"Ignus"
[???]
{???}
~~~~

He was received with the appropriate pomp and flair. Guards bowing in respect as he exited the airship, reverently keeping their heads low and faces stoic as he passed. All of them silent and reserved.

"IDDY!"

...Almost all of them.

"My brother, finally come to see me? To be honest, I did not believe my scouts as the returned to say you would be here... in a few days... not hours... but you airship has been upgraded, I see! I can see that! Can quite see that, yes. Well, did you merely come to see if I breathed and the castle yet stood upon the mountainside? Well, I do, and it does, respectively! So, if that is all, I'm sure you have much you need to do back home-"

He brushed right past him, never even glancing his way.

"...Or you could come in, whichever. Always happy to receive my brother the king!"

Regally, the gryphon turned to the others.

"Remain out here, my brother would like to speak to me in private. Family matters, you see."

Nervously, he followed the king, ever so subtly trying to herd him to the side, away from the throneroom.

"So, Idris, how went everything back home? Defended the homefront valiantly, I suppose? I'm sure you have many a tale of battle to tell me, why don't we retire to the private dining hall and you can tell me all about it?"

Undeterred, Idris continued on.

"Or perhaps you need to rest after your long flight? You seem tired. Why don't we head down to the relaxation room. I have a jacuzzi!... I think. It might be gone. Why don't we go confirm it?"

He was near now, so near that Ignus's feathers began to stick to his brow from sweat.

"Or maybe a game in the hunting lounge? A nice walk out in the private garden? A... literally anywhere but this way because this way is boring with nothing interesting in it to see and-"

With one swing of his claws, the massive doors leading to the throne room were cast aside, revealing quite the number of servants attempting to clean up the mess on the ground even now.

They took one look at the kings wide eyed gape, and they ran in every direction.

"COWARDS!"

His words meant nothing, and soon the brothers were alone.

"...Desperate times, brother. Desperate times."

The king said nothing, just looking all around at where intricate tapestries older than the castle itself had once hung, before trailing down to the scarred piles of black ash all along the ground.

"Now, I know what you're thinking, especially since I requested, begged, or outright blackmailed you in one case to get those over here, but there were creatures, Idris! Undead, screeching monsters who would not die no matter how many times they were stabbed, shot or torn! They were invincible, and the only thing that kept them back was fire! Look upon me, I even had to burn all of my cloths! My cloths, brother!"

He still did not speak, simply staring wide eyed at nothing.

"Can I pay you back somehow? Money? Land? Labor?... Come brother, there must be something I can do to make up for this..."

The silence that hung in the air was the only answer his brother would grant him.

"...Sorry. I know you would have sooner fought to your last breath and kept them safe so that the future may know of our bravery, but I suppose that's why I'm not king, isn't it?"

At last, a sound escaped the king.

A slow, tired sigh.

>Curse you, Ig.

Without warning, the King turned on him, and his claws were bared wide.

Just before they snapped out, and pulled the stunned gryphon into a tight, almost painful embrace.

>I'd rather have you than a bunch of gaudy cloth.

Never before, in all his raucous, crazy, party and merriment driven life had Ignus felt what he did right there. Never before had his heart felt like lead in his chest. Never before has his ever rambling beak been so dry and lacking in words. Never before had he felt the desire, no, the need to hug his brother right back.

Never before had he had to try his very hardest not to cry.

"Blasted... blasted fool. Father would be so irritated at you."

Another sad sigh left the king, just before the grip lessened, and he held his brother at arms length, leaving a strangely empty feeling where his feathers had been.

>I'm coming to find that children seldom live for their parents happiness...

He gave just one more stern pat on Ignus's shoulder, and he returned to his more regal stance, idly pacing the room. For reasons he could never speak, Ignus found himself reaching out, but grasping nothing but air.

>Are all of your servants and staff accounted for?

The words broke the odd haze that had grown over his gaze, and a stern shake of his head cast away all that remained of it.

"Of course! All who fell found themselves back and in fighting shape when the infection died out. What caused such madness, do you know?"

>What it is called, I have no idea. But t'was the princess of Canterlot and the Queen of those foul things, the Changelings, whom finally ended the threat. Haven't you read the paper?

"Brother, I have read the Weekly Trumpet, the Trotting Clopper, and a half dozen others, none spoke of it."

>You need to read the Hive Gazette. It's run by one of those Changelings, so they get information rather fast.

"...I thought that was banned? Is that not banned? You said that was banned..."

>My wife changed my mind.

"And how did she pull that off?"

>...

"HAH! Oh, sometimes I forget that she-devil is the only one who can make you go crosseyed. Always wondered why you never decided to be like father and have more than one lover, but I suppose she'd bite the heads off any who tried!"

>He didn't have more than one, it was a rumor.

"HAH! You poor naive-"

Before any further discussion on family goings about could be made, the doors to the throne room thunderously swung open, and two irritated ponies stomped inwards.

"GAH! GUARDS! WHY AREN'T YOU... oh."

The groans from the unconscious trio right outside the door was all the response he needed.

Instinctively, Idris pulled twin blades from his sheath, becoming a whirlwind of feathers as he smoothly shot towards the pair. Just as instinctively, one ducked. The other, sadly, did not have that option.

Waves of armor fell to the ground as his blades sliced clean through, revealing a unicorn beneath it all.

[WHOA WHOA WHOA! NOT HOSTILE! NOT HOSTILE!... But thank you, that was really-]

A blade was at his neck in a second, the other one pointed at the pegasi adjacent to him. Both ponies, strangely, did not look particularly worried.

{Bloody hell, you're fast. The fucking batmonsters of Trotslvania wasn't that fast.}

[Yeah, he's pretty spritely for an old gu-Hey! Whoa! No poking in the neck! Good guys! We helped your brother over there!]

{Yeah, if it weren't for us, he'd have gotten a lot worse than some stuff burned!}

Curious, Idris cast a look back to his brother.

"...Well, they DID that, yes, but then they also sabotaged my solo flier."

[Because you were trying to escape!]

{Yeah! You wanted to put the blame on us!}

[And then you threw us in the dungeon!]

Both blades lowered to the ground, and Ignus was graced with the single flattest, incredulous stare he had ever seen in his life.

"...I only confirm I threw them in the dungeon for sabotaging my flier, nothing else."

The stare only intensified.

"I thought you would be madder than you were!"

Finally, the stare ended, when Idris's own massive claw smacked himself right in the beak before slowly trailing down his face.

>...Solo flier?

"It's a one gryphon ship. It's neat! Really fast... or at least it was."

>.............You can FLY.

"Bit out of shape, actually. Didn't know if I could make it to Hawktonia or not."

>Eagleton is right there!

"...Hawktonia has the uh... winery with the 'relaxation' room."

If he hit himself any harder, he was going to break his own beak.

"Not that this was important! I just thought you would check Eagleton first and... you're mad at me again, aren't you?"

He let out another long, hot breath.

>What did he promise you?

{Didn't promise us nothin'. We just wanted a ride after we helped him out.}

>A ride to where, exactly?

[Anywhere with a train would be fine, really. See, I'm actually a-]

>I could not care less. I just cannot.

He spun on his paws, regally marching towards the doors.

>There is a train station in my kingdom, try not to take up too much space on my airship.

{...Thank you would be nice too.}

>Do not make me stab you to keep this embarrassment silent.

"Wait, we're doing that anyway, right?... Iddy? Brother?... Idris? We're doing that anyway, right? The silent thing? Making them swear not to tell in exchange for the trip? IDRIS!?"

[So, this ship have a mini-bar? I am really thirsty.]

>It does. Ten bits a drink.

{YOU BLOOMIN' THEIF! Robbery! This is highway robbery!}

>Then don't drink it, water is free.

{ROOKERY!}

[We don't HAVE to get-]

{...}

[Point taken.]

{So, you know any papers who publish anonymous stories about royals?}

"WHAT!?"

>The Hive Gazette.

[Neat.]

"IDDY!"

They continued on, ignoring the portly gryphon stumbling behind them, and sitting gobsmacked in the middle of the hallway.

Before his very eyes, his brother and two companions went onto the airship, and it flew away.

"...WE HAD A MOMENT!"

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Chrysalis
"??"
~~~

She passed 'him' in the hall when she made her way.

'He', of course, didn't look at her, neither did his companion who glared just a bit in her direction. Nothing much to be said from either of them, of course. That's alright, the Queen pondered to herself, she would have all the answers soon enough.

The room she stepped into smelled of antiseptic and medicine, a stringy, sharp scent that always made her feel nauseous, not that she would ever admit it. She hated this room, and every room like it. But she braved it, just so she could see him. The other 'him'. Peacefully resting away on his bed.

>Report.

His eyes snapped open, and to her annoyance he actually tried to stand enough to bow to her. It was only with a gentle, but firm, grip that she shoved him back down.

>I said, report.

The one before her did not answer yet, hissing in pain from where her magic had pressed against. She had hoped to avoid his injuries, but it seemed there were just too many to do so at all.

"...Well, it kind of went like this..."

His casual, almost listless tone told her that whatever painkillers they had him on were clearly working quite well.

"So, I was trying to follow your orders, but-"

>Did you tell him you were sent to protect, Seven?

The changeling tried to shoot up again, once more held in place by her soft magic.

"No, see, I TRIED! I did try to tell him! But he just kept cutting me off by shooting around me!"

A questioning, interested glance looked over his many, many bullet wounds.

"That came later, after Jetset tried to kill me-"

>WHAT!?

Her questioning glance had given way to a fierce, angry snarl, and her almost thoughtful eyes had gone slightly red.

>What do you mean, he tried to kill you!?

"...That. Exactly that. See, I mind zapped Spike so he'd stop shooting me and I could hit him with the bomb and get him out of there, and BOOM! Guy arrives and spins my head around! No warning, no questions, didn't even let me talk, just SNAP!"

There was another bout of confusion following that.

"I turned into an owl. Did you know they can spin their heads around? It's neat. Neat little factoid... OH! But you'll be happy to know, I won!"

>...Really...

The curiosity returned, but it did not take away the anger.

"Yes, my Queen! I was victorious in incapacitating Jetset, and had him completely prone!"

>Did you attempt to kill him following this?

"...Ah, no. I didn't."

>And why not?

He nervously fidgeted, a little unwell looking under her stare.

"He couldn't move, what point was there in killing him? I drained him dry."

Another thoughtful look crossed the Queen's face, but she said no more.

"And anyway, I wouldn't have gotten a chance to, Spike started shooting me. A lot. A LOT. That's why I-"

>Failed the mission.

His chest practically caved in, crestfallen.

"...Yes, your Majesty, I failed the mission. I could not get him to safety, as ordered."

A hoof cupped under his chin, gently lifting it back up from it's bowed, saddened bent.

>Very few made it to safety, I suppose it was simply not meant to be.

"Yeah, don't know what happened with the Hive, but you can blame the Elements failure on-"

>I am well aware of what she did, Seven, and you are ordered to speak of it to no one.

He reeled back, shocked.

>Do not think it an act of kindness, I simply do not wish anyone else to know one disobeyed me so openly. I will deal with her, it is not your concern.

"Of course, your Majesty."

Her hoof curled around, gently rubbing him on the top of his head. For a while, he could do nothing but stare in confusion, utterly unsure of what to do or how to react to this.

Finally, he felt just a touch of love transfer between the connection, just a bit.

>You failed your mission...

The strange dichotomy of her actions and her words was not lost on the changeling, and only served to compound his confusion.

>There is no way around it. I do not care about winning against Jetset, I do not care what other failures occurred. You tried, and you failed.

His heart, once more, felt the onset of being utterly broken, even as her hoof continued to gently rub his head.

>You kept trying right til the end, didn't you? Even as he shot you and cut off your every word, you kept trying, and failing.

Broken, he could only nod.

>...Good job...

And just like that, it was as if she had picked up every shard in his chest, and put it right back where it was meant to be.

Smoothly, she rose from her chair.

>Rest. There will be many, many missions for you yet to come. Harder ones, easier ones, it does not matter. They will come, and you will perform.

She turned, not so much as casting a glance back to him as she made her way to the door.

>Make sure this is the last time you are ever hurt like this. If your dedication is enough that you will risk this level of injury, surely it is enough you will not risk any more if I order it.

His hooves curled into the blanket, his teeth gritting together in pain.

"I will never fail you again, your Majesty, you will not regret giving me another chance."

She cast only one look back to him, and then she spoke only one last time before she closed the door.

>Rest.

With the barrier swiftly closed behind her, she found herself looking at 'him' once more. The cause of all of this...

>This will be the last time I send someone to save your scaly ass. Next time, shoot yourself and save me the trouble.

With that last barb shot, she stomped off, further down into the medical wing and leaving behind a bitter, stricken dragon and a seething pony.

But they were of no consequence, not yet. She had one last stop she needed to see...

And this one was going to be the hardest of them all.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Non Canon

>Luna
"88"
'Cordies'

In the midst of a great slumber, Princess Luna finds herself drawn to the turbulent dreams of a mind she has never touched herself before. The mindscape is one of a barren wasteland, devoid of life.

>What deviltry is this? What ails this poor soul's mi-

She blinks as a group of figures come into focus. A changeling, surrounded by cordyceps zombies, sits as her tormentors dance around her, eyes vacant.

>Strange, but we do not see what is so ba-

'Creepy crawly cordyceps
'Send tremors through your mind
'Spreading spores
'Will dust your pores
'And put you in a bind!'

Slowly the changeling looks at Luna.

"Killlll meeeeeee..."

>...nnnnnnope!

Luna promptly bites herself on the foreleg and pulls herself back into the land of the waking.

>...great now that song is in our head!

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Pinkie
"Igneous"
~~~~

>DADDY! You're okay!

"Indeed, child. Our homestead survived the storm."

>Oh, thank goodness! I was so worried the zombies got you!

"Do not be silly. We have worked our whole lives at breaking things, not to be broken. I stood up and battered them all away like pins."

>Oh wow!

"Oh yes, you mother was quite impressed as I beat them from the sky, cracked any magic, caved faces in with one blow..."

>...

"She was very, very impressed."

>...Are... are you wearing a different hat.

It was very, very rare she saw her father smile.

"Sorry, daughter, I wish we could speak more... but I am only taking a break. I will speak more in a bit. Bond with your sisters, they miss you."

He took a long, long, long drink of the water he had been holding, and then turned around and went right back in.

>...Well... that's another memory I'm going to be repressing right next to the zombies.

"Are you ready for round fifty?"

>R-repressing...

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>SA
"42"
'Cadence'
~~~

>Please stop struggling. This is only making me sad.

"Shining Armor, I demand you release me at once! If my Queen has gone to Canterlot to survey the Hive, I am needed!"

>Forty Two, I want you to think about this. You know I was drained until I DIED, kind of, right? And yet, somehow, I am holding you down. Do you really think you being up is a good idea?

"... What!?"

'Didn't get a chance to tell her that, actually-'

"YOUWHATWHEREWHENHOWWHODIDTHATWHYINEEDTOSETTHEMONFIRE-"

>Giant mushroom and it's dead, actually.

"GIANT WHAT!?"

>Okay, see? This is why you need to stay put long enough to bring you up to speed. And also until your skin grows back. You see you have no skin on your legs, right? Or Chitin.. or carapace... whatever you guys call your skin. There is none. From the looks of it, it was exploded off too. You exploded off your skin, and yet somehow you want to run.

"I CAN FLY!"

>Can you really?

"...Well, maybe not right NOW, but usually-"

>No, Forty Two. You are not getting up until you HAVE SKIN. That is an order.

"YOU DON'T ORDER ME AROUND!"

'Forty Two? Please? For me?'

"..."

>...Okay, and I am noticing you just stopped struggling-

"NO REASON!"

>I think there is-

"I HAVE SURVEYED THE SITUATION AND DETERMINED THIS IS THE BEST COURSE OF ACTION!"

>...So, you're still not going to-

'PUTTHEHELMETDOWN!'

"...I was just readjusting it."

'No. Noooo. Bad Punchbug.'

"...M'sorry..."

>...Man, the bed is going to be awkward as hell when we get back to it.

"..."

'PUT IT DOWN!'

"JUST READJUSTING I SWEAR!"

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Applebloom
"Applejack"
~~~~

>Hey, sis? Gotta question.

"...This ain't right..."

>Ah' was just wonderin', after Ah' get mah' cutie mark...

"When yer' thirty."

>What'ya say?

"Ah' said go on."

>Anyway, after Ah' get it, do Ah' still have ta' go ta' school?

"What? Course ya' do! Ya' need a full education!"

>Why? Isn't mah' cutie mark supposed ta' tell me exactly what Ah'm s'posed ta' do fer' the rest o' mah' life? Ah' mean, school sounds great by tryin' ta' give us science and math and all that so that ya' can decide which way ya' wanna go, but then when ya' know, what's the point? Ain't this a magical destiny or somethin'?

"...Er..."

>And fer' that matter, what if yer' cutie mark is about somethin' that ain't taught in school at all! Iffin' Ah' got another hoola hoop cutie mark, where would Ah' go ta' learn that?

"..."

>And fer' that matter, what about-

"Celestia."

>...What?

"The answer ta' all yer' questions is 'Celestia did it, and it's her fault'."

>That... that don't answer-

"LOOK! A CUTIE MARK SALESPONY!"

>WHERE!?.... Ah' don't see- AJ YOU GET BACK HERE!

"JUST BLAME IT ON CELESTIAAAAAaaaaa...."

>Dang she can run...

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

CD

>???
“???”
‘???’
______

>I can’t help but notice how my past actions have been less than… professional.

Cringing, Jetset continued to survey the peaceful land of Sweet Apple Acres from his vantage point, hidden in the dense foliage of an apple tree.

What would his mentor say if she saw him like this?

Past that… what would his Queen say? Her most trusted agent… just up and leaving without a word….

>…

Caught up in deciding whether it’d be worth it to simply fall from the tree and break his neck, it took Jetset a moment to notice the pony happily trotting through the farm gates.

Actually, it was a mare.

Actually, it was a mare dressed in some sort of dirt-smudged white gown and carrying what looked like a first-aid box on her back.

He stared, so baffled by her that he forgot what he was supposed to be doing.

And then it clicked, who this mare was.

>What are you doing here?

“EEEEEEEK! I- wh-what just- how did you get behind me?”

>Irrelevant. What. Are you. Doing here?

“W-well, I’m your nurse, aren’t I? You’re darn right I am! And as such, I have an obligation to see to your health!”

>…You were my nurse for all of two hours. Two months ago. At two thousand feet above ground.

“I know, right? Time sure flies, don’t it? But if there’s one thing that don’t change is your addiction to getting yourself beat up!”

>I did not get beat up. I got the energy drained from-

“Gah, that’s even worse! Here, sit down, sit down, let me run a quick diagnostic, make sure you’re really better.”

For reasons that would forever elude him, Jetset found himself falling back onto his haunches, regarding the mare before him with a look of confusion behind his shades.

>…How did you find me?

“Oh! Well- ha! That’s a funny story! See, it was right after Nightmare Night and I was trying to fix up my box- sometimes ponies think there’s no one living in it and try to throw it away… and I’m sure they didn’t hear my protests over the wind, it was really windy that night, you know?”

>…

“But anyway, um… yeah, yeah, so after that, there was this… epidemic? I guess that’s what it was called, what the news called it anyhow. I honestly didn’t catch much, the moment I heard the screams I closed both flaps on my box. That’s a big deal for me, closing both flaps, that’s like Def Con level ‘fuck no’!”

He almost chuckled.

Almost.

“Call it natural nurse instinct, because I figured that with all of that hullabaloo going on, you had to be somewhere in the middle of it. Tried to get on a train to Canterlot but, uh… ha, those tickets aren’t cheap, believe you me! So I saved a bit, but then I got that bit borrowed when I was sleeping….”

>…

“It’s cool, though, I’m sure they’ll bring it back, plus interest! So after that first bit, I saved another bit and got my ticket. But the moment I went to get on the train, the new Princess herself hops right on off! …And then you kinda just staggered off after her so I followed!”

There was this annoying pull just behind his chest that caused Jetset to remain silent for a moment when she finished.

>But… that was over a day ago.

“You two move fast and I got lost!”

>…I-

‘Jet? Boy, who’re y’all talkin’ to all the way out there?’

>Go back to the farmhouse, my Queen, we just have a little infestation of-

“Y-your majesty!”

The nurse mare sank into a bow so low her forehead cracked off the hard earth.

“It’s an honor!”

>…

‘…Okay, firstly, Jet? Ah’m not yer’ Queen. An’ secondly, ya might wanna bring yer’ friend here on inside, she’s bleedin’ pretty good there.’

>My Queen, I dare not sully your homestead with the likes of her.

“He’s right! I live in a box, I’m not even worth the time it’d take to spit on me!”

A tolerance level he didn’t know existed within him for this strange mare had been reached and consequently blown apart, and Jetset felt his lips part-

‘Sugar, while yer’ in my presence, Ah’d better not ever hear that sorta talk again or we’re gonna have problems. We clear?’

But Applejack had beaten him to the punch.

“Y-yes, ma’am!”

‘Good, now git’ yer’ plot on down to the farm, what’s wrong with y’all, ya look malnourished!’

Whoever that mare was, she could only sink in on herself under Applejack’s nagging as the two of them started back down the dirt lane.

Stunned, Jetset watched them go, wondering just how this turn of events had come to be… that is, until he noticed something funny about his second Queen’s hooves.

>My Queen… why are your hooves charred like that…?

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Applejack
“Granny Smith”
-Jetset-
‘???’

“Applejack?”

>Yeah, Granny?

“Didn’t I tell y’all to get yerself cleaned up inna bathroom? You still look like somethin’ outta a thunderstorm”

>Oh, yeah, ah tried to clean the dirt off an’ all, but it ain’t all comin’ off

It was an understatement, the orange princess still had scorched hooves, singed mane and hair in frazzled, dead strands.

“Come on now, do I really hafta go up there an’ clean you up mahself?”

She cringed at the memories of older years, all she remembered of those times as a filly was a flurry of screaming, suds and sanitary bombardment.

>Ah’m tryin’, Granny, it’s just…ah don’t think this stuff can be cleaned off-

‘’Scuse me, ‘scuse me- Oh, your majesty? Which way to the kitchen?’

They had; only briefly, forgotten about the two relative newcomers, and the nurse was already locked onto the smells of the kitchen.

>Just keep going on in, y’all find it, and ah don’t want you sayin’ anything else till you’ve gotten some food in you, ya hear?

‘Oh yes of course, your maje- Oh my that does smell rather niceGIVEITTOME!’

With that the nurse had broken off into a dash towards the kitchen, hunger trumping etiquette, as it should’ve been, in Granny’s eyes.

-…-
>Oh, Jet, listen can’t ye just make yerself comfortable an’

-Your majesty-

“Oh now don’t you start too”

-Your hooves, what happened to them-

>Ahh, Jet, it’s a long story, ah wish you were there t’listen to jess’ what ah did, but you’re still half awake, ah really think y’ should get some rest before ya-

-I need to know-

“GAH! Mah granddaughter russled a dang mushroom powder keg with her bare hooves and made it burn to a cinder up into exact-o-sphere whatjimacallit, and she did it all with her head still screwed on funny, so quit yappin’ sonny! This ain’t no book signing!”

-…Mushroom bomb-

He attempted to process the old mares ramble, only some things managed to click into place, fewer things survived cross-examination though.

>Ya…you didn’t see it? Tha-..Oh…oh ya probably didn’t, ya…did y’all get..y’know, taken by ‘em?

-No-

>Uhh, then what-

-I was incapacitated by an uninfected individual-

“…Ya got knocked fer six by somepony, issat right?”

>Jet? Really?

His second Queen was grossly uninformed, she had to know all if he could protect her, the injuries her Royal Protector had inflicted on his Nemesis, the stone he wielded, how he had fought him, how he had lost, the apparent plot left by the Other Queen. All of it, she had to know, he had to inform, or else she was vulnerable, she wasn't even standing still right, she kept swaying right in front of him.

-There is much to say-

>Uhh, Jet? yer wobblin’ again

“Oh for petes- BIG MAC! GIT OVER HERE”

His vision was wobbling, mind dutifully filing every possible response his second Queen could react with each piece of news.

And he fell

Again

>…Ok, Mac? Just get him onto the sofa, Celly really needs to give him a break.

“Royalty, what are ye gonna do about em?”

>Granny, Ah’m technically royalty still

“Oh Pfooey, yer still mah lil’ sugarcube, now come on an’ git to the bathroom, Ah’ll hafta sort you out myself iffin I must”

They left Jetset on the couch, hopefully to recover fully, who only dreamt of jumping changelings.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Rekulk
"Apprentice Trader"
'Steam Gauge'
-Quicksilver Sash-

-Okay, explain this again to me.-

'I have to pee and our bathroom still has a gaping hole to hell in it so you're ok lookout.'

-No dude, I mean why are we still here!? After all this crap why didn't we just take off with the other guards?-

'Uhhh...to spare the leiutenant the burden of being alone with the sarge, Punch, and Maker?'

-...-

'The possibility of promotions by default with almost everyone who out ranks us running off?'

-...-

'...you wanted reasons, you didn't say nothin' about them being good one-'

>HALLO!

'-CELESTIA FUCK!-'

"...is this greeting?"

>Ponies! We are glad for your survival!

-Oh...ohhh it's just the cave weirdos again.-

>Yes, hallo ponyfriends! Time of costumes and treats is over now yes?

'What? That's BEEN over for a while...'

>For truly?

"Just the few days?"

-...Nightmare Night isn't multiple days, hence the name.-

>Really? Rekulk must admit, first night was quite fun, but second night, where all ponies were red and screamy and chased Morlocks back to caves?

"Less so."

>Muchly. But aha and oho, we Morlocks installed our state of many arts security system!

"We rolled boulder in front of cave opening and ran too deep for them to follow."

>And now all is well, yes? Yes. Do ponies wish to trade?

'...still need to pee.'

"This does not answer our questions."

-Just...move on a bit, huh? I'm sure someone in the castle wants to trade.-

>Yes indeed! Come Sebjek! We shall trade with ponies and also deliver the Head of Metal's instructions to my sister! Hurrah!

"Hurrah!"

The two scurry off.

-...a rock? Seriously? They staved off invasion with a rock?-

'I don't question those lunatics, neither should you.'

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________