This essay had many flaws, chiefly deriving from poorly managed time. The thesis is unbalanced and does not fully answer the question. The portion dealing with identity is vague in the thesis, and continues to be vague and contentless. Thus, the thesis fails to answer the question, and the essay contains a paragraph, the last one, that is completely meaningless.

The last paragraph completely fails to address the issue of identity in the American colonies. The final paragraph is free of any reference whatsoever to teh essay, flawed, compromised, and meaningless thesis. Without these references, the final paragraph is aan incomprehensible jumble of incoherent facts. The paragraph is filled with vague adjectives such as "very different strategies" (p4, ln 6-7). The paragraph offers vague descriptions of the French-and-Indian war, with little historical background or comment. This weak argumentation is concluded with an irrelevant reference to a document, obviously a vain, cheap attempt for brownie points through document reference. Little of the document is analysed. Thus, the final paragraph is naught but an incoherent stream of pseudo-historical drivel, far from actual argumentation.

IN contrast, the proceding paragraphs place far too much emphasis on unity, when the prompt places the two aspects in equal weight. One offender is the second paragraph, a monster of a paragraph that is poorly organized and confusing. It places farr too much focus on the loyalty divisions (1/3, 1/3, 1/3) than is warranted; much of the information is overstated and irrelevant to the essay. This is a key example of one of the essay's greatest flaws: unnecessary wordiness and long-windedness that compromises the effectiveness of argumentation. This is a key indication of poor time-management on the author's part and provides an explanation, though not an excuse, for the many problems with the final paragraph.

The third paragraph begins abruptly, with nothing to distinguish it from the proceeding one. Like other paragraphs, it is poorly organized. It's chief flaw is long-windedness, using far too many words to descripe only somewhat relevant information. This seriously compromises the essay.

In conclusion, this essay begins with vague argumentation and continues on to consistantly fail to include references to the feeble thesis. The essay leans heavily on long-winded description rather than document analysis. This results in a general failure to answer the question completely or thoroughly, and reflects the author's poor organization and time-management skills.