Anima, Ch.1: Advent

[Anima, Ch.1: Advent]
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--01-- [Scene: Blank]
Darkness and silence.




--02--
I am a lost soul, with no body and no memory. Alone in darkness and silence, adrift in a void between worlds.
I think, therefore I am —— but without reference, without stimulus, without purpose.



--03--
I don't remember who I was. I don't remember where I lived.
How I lived. When I lived.
When I...died.
I must be dead. This void can only be death; what lies beyond death.

--04--
I knew myself, once. But those memories...are gone.
Did I simply forget, after so long without material form?
Or does the void of death wipe the soul clean?
It makes no difference.

--05--
I see without eyes, but there is nothing to see.
I hear without ears, but there is no sound.
I can think, but have nothing to think of.
I can will myself to move, but there is nowhere to go.

--06--
There is nothing. Nothing but torment. The torment of existence denied.
Or rather...there was nothing.



--07--
Something disturbs the void.
Sound? Yes. Sound.
A voice. A voice from...beyond the void.
I do not know the language it speaks, but somehow I understand the voice without knowing its words.

--08--

"Oh, lost and fading soul. Do you desire life anew?"



--09--
Is this real, or madness?
Is the void now taking my mind, now that it has taken everything else?
No. The voice repeats. Stronger. It is real.


--10--
"Oh, lost and fading soul. Do you desire life anew?"

I want to answer. I want nothing more than to answer, to cry out, "yes!"
But I don't know HOW to answer it. I have no body, and I want to scream.

--11--
I am a formless mass of thoughts and feelings adrift in a void. What do even I answer with?
Not knowing what else to do, I think. Yes. Yes. Yes!
Will I be heard? Will I be answered?


--12--
I plead to the unbidden voice, a silent plea for salvation.
I waited. I know not how long I waited. Time has no meaning here. There is only an eternal 'now.'
Finally, an absolution arrives.


--13--
"Then it is so. I grant unto this lost soul form and life anew."




--14--
There is something in the darkness that is not darkness.
I remember what it is. A memory of...light? Light. This is light!



--15--
The light comes for me. Or am I moving towards it? I cannot tell.
It grows. It consumes the darkness. Consumes me. Painful and beautiful, an exquisite agony!



--16--
An incredible cascade of forgotten sensations floods into my consciousness.
Warmth. Gravity. Sound. Vibration. Form.
I have been bound in a cage of fleshly existence.


--17-- {SFX: pit-pat}
Something within this cage of flesh begins to...pulse.
A heart beats. The pulse of life stirs.
The flow of time returns as well. "Past" and "Future" exist to me once more.


--18--
The flesh stirs, unbidden. Without my willing it, it...breathes? Yes.
This flesh takes its first breath, drawing in...air.
The breath of life flows. In and out, in and out.


--19--
This cage of flesh is imprinting primal knowledge upon my soul.
How to exist. How to perceive. How to move. How to live.



--20--
These are...arms? And...legs? The flesh tells me, yes, that's what these are.
I tried to move them. The unfamiliar appendages shift just so, untried and clumsy.



--21-- {SFX: wind}
These are...ears? Yes.
They hear...wind? Yes.
Yes, that's what this sensation is. Through flesh, I hear the wind.


--22--
These are...eyes? Yes.
Open. I must open these eyes.
I open these eyes, and am blinded by their first light.


--23-- [Scene: Filia]
I know only of darkness. Everything is impossibly bright in comparison.
It hurts. It hurts to look at it.
The flesh commands: keep the eyes open, drink in more light. I must. They will...adjust?


--24--
The white...diminishes. Something bearable. Variations emerge.
These...are colors.
What are the ones I'm seeing called? Blue. Brown. Blue sky and brown earth.


--25--
Out of these disparate sensations forms an awareness.
This body is lying on its back. Lying on something. Something solid. Firm. Warm.
It is looking up, up into a sky filled with clouds.


--26--
I no longer know where mind ends and flesh begins.
I am one with it. It is one with me.
There is only "me" now. A person. Alive.


--27--
I want to experience more. I want...to move. I try and lift myself from the ground.
Stand. I want to stand. How do I stand?



--28--
Push with the arms. Lift with the legs. I rise up. Unsteady, untested, but I stand.
I want to look around me. How? Turn the neck. Turn the head. Move the feet.



--29--
I see all that there is to see around me.
I am not alone. There is another being here with me.
Her form is similar to mine. She is draped in black. Her hair is long and white.


--30-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
(Nao)
Hello there. This must all be very strange to you, um...?
I...do not know what to call you. Usually when a soul arrives from the Soul Stream,
I know their name right away. What is your name?


--31-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
This voice. This voice is the one that called out to me, called me back from oblivion.
It's hard to shape these words. I've never done it before.
For the first time, I speak, and hear my own voice.


--32-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
"I...don't know...my name. I don't...remember...anything. I was in...darkness. Then I was...here?"
Something strikes me as odd. Shouldn't there be more...movement? More...life?



--33-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
(Nao)
You have noticed? You are not quite fully immersed in this world yet.
I want to allow you to adjust, to ease yourself back into life.
When you are ready, you will see everything.


--34-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
(Nao)
My name is Nao. It is my duty to lead souls like yours to the land of Erinn.
But I must admit, you are...unusual.
I chose your form, as you could not envision one yourself. I hope you like it...


--35-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
"Chose...form?" Oh. Bodies like this one came in two forms. Forms called 'male' and 'female.'
This body is 'female.' It feels...familiar. It feels...right.



--36-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
(Nao)
You must be terribly confused, if you were in the Soul Stream for so long that your memories vanished.
You do not know your name at all? We must call you by something. Shall I give you one?



--37-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
(Nao)
There is a very old word that suits you: "Mearaithe."
But that's too long. Too awkward. Perhaps just "Meara," then. Do you care for it?



--38-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
It feels strange. I do not know my true name. 'Meara' certainly isn't it.
But it's as good a name as any. I can accept it. Meara. I am Meara.
"Meara. I...I guess it'll do."


--39-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
(Nao)
Now then...Meara. You must have so many questions!
I will answer as many as I can. What can I help you understand?



--40-- <BGM: The Story of a White Deer>
"Only everything."
I don't even know where to begin. This...is going to take a lot of getting used to.



[chapter end]