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- >Invited to a ball in an undead kingdom
- >Why did they even invite me? I don't know any undead
- >Ah well free food
- >At least I hope they have food
- >Do undead even eat? Or do they just survive off of semen?
- >Put on my nicest pair of anti-rape jeans and non-anti-rape T-shirt
- >Jump into a cab and tell the cat girl cabbie
- >"YO HOMES, TO DEAD AIR"
- >Surpisingly the cab was just a normal cab with a monster girl driver
- >She didn't even try to rape me
- >Usually they're just rape cabs that suddenly grow bigger on the inside and you find yourself in the middle of 2 Onis who paid good money for a hubby to share
- >But I ain't complaining
- >I pay the cabbie and she speeds off leaving me in front of the charnel house
- >A gargoyle ushers me inside and the most extravagant party before me unveiled, I pushed past the greeters to find the most important object
- >Food
- >And while the food is... unique, and by that I mean this is the stuff you hear about in history class, or that your grandparents make, lobster, caviar, kippers, sauerkraut, boiled meats, and turnips
- >But beggars can't be choosers
- >I take up a plate pushing aside ghouls, zombies and dullahans
- >I find a seat by myself and start eating like a ghoul starved of cock
- >Just as I finish my food a Zombie Dragon drops a whole tray of food on the table
- >Not just normal food but semlas and with a whole bucket of hot sweetened condensed milk
- >Just as I try to get up so I can escape this death by diabetes the Zombie Dragon sits me back down
- >"Sorry, mistah, but mistress said to make ya blood extra sweet tonight!"
- >She force feeds puff after puff and washing it down with milk
- >Thank god my pancreas has built up a resistance from all those years of drinking Holstaur milk
- >But even I have my limits, and those limits include almost being choked to death by an overzealous Zombie Dragon
- >I woke later feeling sick as i look around
- >I'm strapped to chair, a need is stuck into my arm drawing blood out into a wine glass, and I don't have any pants
- >Damn I really liked those pants
- >A Vampire walks in from the dark
- >"Fufufufu, I didn't imagine that invitation would work"
- >Wait a second, that isn't a Vampire
- >"Don't tell me you don't recognize me, my sweet bully?"
- >She's a Dhampir from next door that I used to bully all the time, because she was a shut in
- >She didn't even have a weakness to the sun, she's just a NEET
- >"Now time to sample your sweet, sweet blood, Anon"
- >I swear I didn't even do nothing that bad to her besides banter and taking the piss outta her
- >They should put a warning sign designating which monsters are bully-bait
- >She press a thumb into my arm causing more blood to flow out filling up the wine glass completely
- >She takes one sip of my forbidden cherry sauce, and I mean quite literally cherry sauce cause of all that sugar
- >The Dhampir then falls over face first
- >Dear Goddess I think I killed her with a sugar overdose
- >I then notice a wet spot form on her crotch as she lightly convulses
- >Did... did she just pass out and cum from drinking my blood?
- >I try to scoot the chair to the window so I can kill myself but the chair is bolted down
- >But I do succeed in loosening the straps
- >I escape into the night using a snack tray as a way to cover my indecency
- >I finally reach home the sun hanging high overhead
- >As I rest onto my couch I notice two things out of place
- >One an insulin needle on my table, and two red glowing orbs shining in the reflection of my TV and a female figure to go with them
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