What the balls

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Greetings, human!
Stranger: Aasshole
Stranger: human
Stranger: how u doin>
You: I am quite well? How is your health this fine daycycle?
Stranger: worse
Stranger: the weather is unfriendly
Stranger: i dont bring any sweater and umbrella
Stranger: so tell me why you so serious
Stranger: like joker said
You: That is very unfortunate, human. You should adjust your meteorological control unit.
Stranger: control or kontol
Stranger: baby
Stranger: kontol means dick
You: I am not sure that I understand!
Stranger: damnassholefuckingwhorebitch
You: Please forgive my lack of knowledge regarding your culture.
Stranger: that's a good word
You: It is my first time visiting your star system.
Stranger: ok
Stranger: what u see
Stranger: any star
Stranger: or any shitting
You: You have a small, medium-temperature star here. It is quite pleasant. I believe you call it Sol?
Stranger: lookingatmyassandullsee
Stranger: not good huh
Stranger: tom cruise is better than nicole kidman
Stranger: and angelina jollie is sexier than brad pitt
You: Ah, I am familiar with this Tom Cruise person!
You: He is in frequent contact with a genetic relation of mine.
Stranger:  you live in dirty village
Stranger: so u dont even know tom cruise
Stranger: poor u
Stranger: u're a peasant
You: I have not taken up residence on your planet- I currently reside in an orbital platform in geostationary orbit.
Stranger: nice to know
Stranger: owww
Stranger: you are an alien right
You: Tell me, where on the surface of your planet do you reside?
Stranger: alien without dick
Stranger: and dont have ass
Stranger: so how you take a pee
Stranger: from ur mouth
Stranger: and ur shit come from ur ear
You: I find it curious that you humans are so intrigued by the bodily functions of my people.
Stranger: omg
Stranger: it sound disgusting
Stranger: yes
You: You are quite entertaining, human. Do your peers and genetic relations think so too?
Stranger: im not human
Stranger: im a donkey
Stranger: like your mom
Stranger: your mom was have sex with me
Stranger: when she was young
Stranger: her boobs is little and tiny
Stranger: only cost 500 bucks
You: I am uncertain as to what you are saying, human. What is a 'mom'?
Stranger: mom is
Stranger: man on mother
Stranger: i was give your mother
Stranger: dumbass
Stranger: with doggystyle
Stranger: and missionary
Stranger: u know why
You: Ah! I see. You mammals call your female genetic creator a 'mom'?
Stranger: bcoz your parents didnt agree with my relationship with horse
Stranger: then
You: I am not very familiar with the reproductive workings of your species, I am afraid.
Stranger: owww
Stranger: so u ML with bacterial
Stranger: species
Stranger: from area 51
Stranger: never mind
Stranger: if u dont want to admit
Stranger: i just curious about your sex
Stranger: because you like dumbass
Stranger: and like bajingan kasta terendah
You: I do not think that my people have a 'sex' like your species.
Stranger: owww
Stranger: you know
Stranger: bajingan
Stranger: kontol
You: I do not understand, human.
Stranger: ah kru sh ite uq
Stranger: it means youre the nicest creature in this universe
Stranger: sakjane koe ki ngapusi
Stranger: aku yo ra ngerti
Stranger: pie bajingan koyo koe iso ndobol meneh
Stranger: wo men ta ke ce hen ai
You: I must remember to find a better translation module for my subdermal implants.
Stranger: shen me mew suc suo
Stranger: you
You: At this point, I am only able to understand the language you call 'English'.
Stranger: should
Stranger: owwwww
Stranger: animal could u
Stranger: like rroroooooarar
Stranger: guk
Stranger: guk
Stranger: or shit
Stranger: crot
Stranger: pret
You:  Hm. It appears there is some solar interference in my terminal.
Stranger: apache
You: Please excuse me, human. Enjoy your daycycle!