FOE commentary 42

And here it goes!!!

“Stay out!!  The plants kill!”
 - It's a shame I never got around to playing NV :\ but oh well, I got something better on my hands now! ^^ (for the people wondering, it's FO:E itself.)

Stay away!
 - The wasteland can't let us have nice things, now can it?

She reached out a tentative hoof and touched it, her hoof pulling back instantly as if she had reached out to touch molten lava.
 - Oh lawd, the Fierce Doombunny must make quite an impression, even in this state.

The wind picked up.  The rustling through the leaves was a haunting sound.  It made the weeping willow sound like it was sobbing.
 - I can feel my heart cry at this. Poor Fluttershy... it must have been so long, and that's only considering being stuck there.

Get away! Velvet Remedy took a step closer.
 - This does not bode well.

Suddenly there was so much blood. The zebra’s body seemed to explode in sick gouts of hot crimson.  It was as if each of her stripes had been flensed off her body, leaving gaping wounds of blood and meat.
 - The image, gawhagdjkhagfvjfa- It's so powerful! My heart squeezed at reading her like this. (Because of this, I creeped myself out several times over at the sight of a red-painted zebra while browsing Ponibooru, several days after. That's how powerful that image was.)

If I could form a blade, I could form a cast.
 - I... I have no words. ...Maybe one, and that's 'masterful'.

Xenith had seen the threat and understood it.  Sometimes, I feel as if I am an earth pony and that my stripes are really great wounds.
 - Checkov would be proud to nominate you his daughter, just sayin'.

The Everfree Forest was home to a mobile, aggressive, sadistic plant filled with transformation magic.
 - It doesn't get much worse than this.

What have I said? I asked myself in mounting horror.  After Arbu, I thought of myself as a monster.  Did I ever say that aloud?  Does it matter to killing joke if I did?  Oh Celestia, did I ever call myself heartless?
 - I know I'd be paralyzed in place too if I had such thoughts at the moment :O

He jumped a fallen log covered in mounds of blackish-green moss; the ground beneath the log tore open, vines of blue wrapping around it, reaching.
 - I have never experienced true literary panic before reading this. (literary as in, conveyed by literature.) That 'reaching' is just too much for me.

And Fluttershy ... was its lure.  And, more hellishly, its victim.
 - Figures why Shy would be sobbing so hard. Oh, Kkat, I'm crying myself out here for goodness' sake!

Only they weren’t assassins, were they?  Nopony had called them that except the pony in my head. ... but because the Enclave revered shock and awe, and the Wonderbolts were the best at it.
 - Oooh, you make the best reasonings Kkat.

They were reptilian, like miniature dragons, with leathery wings and wicked claws and strange, beaked heads with red eyes that glinted in malice.
 - Have we seen them before? ...OHSHI- Incoming stone statues!

The Enclave’s premier sniper was one of the two Wonderbolts hanging back, out of sight but still very much in the action.
 - Hehe, can't have a true assault team without a good sniper.

And he would have made short work of the killing joke.
 - Not to mention, being completely immune to it, either by the protecting armor, or the ghoul status.

“Divide and save, remember?”
 - Maybe it's just me, but I would have preferred the original version 'divide and conquer' here.

“We have to save her!”
 - It was just a matter of time before she had that idea, now wasn't it?

As we passed between trees, I caught a glimpse of Calamity pegasus-fighting with the fiery-maned Wonderbolt.
 - LOL, if it were any other author writing 'pegagus-fighting', I swear I wouldn't have taken it as seriously.

But the Enclave elite had yet to consummate a fatal shot.
 - That 'consummate'... was a very clever and poignant word to use there.

Horrifying, pain-soaked memories of SteelHooves’ death flashed through my mind as the hellhound erupted from the ground beneath Life Bloom.
 - OH GAWD WHY, WHY!!

The hellhound’s timing was a fraction off, his helmet slamming into Life Bloom’s underbelly, ...
 - Armored and with a helmet... They're the Enclave's mental lackeys. Straight rendition of the Deathclaws. Classic.

Physical hurt gave way to something deeper as I realized the shot had struck my cutie mark, possibly doing permanent damage.  I wailed.
 - Oh man, this just can't be. Someone tell me it isn't.

The balefire phoenix jerked around to see her attacker and immediately turned to stone.  The stoned phoenix dropped.
 - ... I know there's supposed to be a happy ending somewhere, but I'll bre damned if I can see it from here.

The earth pony let out a wide-eyed meep. The two other hellhounds spun to see the pony who had apparently snuck up behind them.  With unthinking aggression, they jumped at her, claws flashing.
 - I... You never fail to impress, Kkat.

I realized I hated those plants.  Not just feared them.  Loathed them with spectacular intensity.
 - Well, it's an alternative to being paralyzed in fear at their sight, so bring it!

“Fucker… weaponized the Buckaneer Blaze…”
 - That move... Oh God, I cannot fully describe my horror. I suspect multiple jaws will be dropped shortly as it finally happens on-screen.

Hello?  Look, I know we both decided to do this thing in the Everfree Forest -- hoping we could use the environment against each other and all that -- but we were clearly stupid.  Think maybe we could call a time-out until we all get away from the pony-murdering woods?
 - You'd think at first, each party only thought about the disadvantages the field gave to the OTHER party.

I was fighting a strong urge to push her back, strip off my armor, and check my flank.
 - I don't think my heart will be able to bear her checking, knowing Pip.

“I may have to use it to relieve the pressure in her skull… by dissolving part of it.”  Almost unnecessarily, he added, “And that is risky.”
 - The Wasteland can be so unnecessarily cruel at times, forcing ponies with such unbearable choices. And I LOVE it for such coherency, it truly brings a literary environment to life.

The memory seemed to dissolve even as my mind grasped for it.  I stomped the ground in frustration; I was sure it had been important.
 - Trying to remember the Supernatural book, obviously.

“Whuf?” he asked innocently, taking in our stares.  “If worph sumechinn.”
 - Especially in a pinch.

“Yes, because then they will be free-willed, hyper-aggressive creatures who have just suffered mind-control at the hooves of ponies,” Life Bloom pointed out serenely.  “Far less dangerous.”
 - LOL! Didn't think about that myself. Aw well, at least it was worth proposing.

“Don’t you dare tell me how cutie marks don’t matter!” I hissed.
 - Heh, this one line didn't work much for me. I know Pip's rational at all times, but she doesn't sound emotionally invested enough in this one. (not to mention, it's probably the only thing that doesn't work for me in the ENTIRE chapter. Possibly in multiple chapters.)

(With radishes, my little pony suggested bizarrely.)
 - Never ling a chance for bizarre connections, aren't we? :p

But after a few deep breaths, the focus of my anger began to trickle away from Velvet Remedy and more towards myself.  The world became blurrier until it was nothing by watery shapes.
 - YOU'RE TEARING ME APART, KKAT! (seriously.)

“Daymn,” Calamity whispered with a resurgence of hope.  Maybe his plan wasn’t a total wash after all.
 - Things starting to look good, you're doing it right.

“uh, Pipsqueak?”  “Littlepip,” I corrected,
 - Ha! Nice counter-reference.

“Whatcha bet when their girl down there got un-stonified, they all got some sort of signal?” Oh fuck.
 - It's the heroes' fine print, apparently, you don't get a moment's rest.

“And Twilight Sparkle could do that at least five times in one day?” he asked weakly.
 - I know, right? I wonder, if the war wouldn't have happened, if she would have just grown a pair of wings and become the next Princess.

Jet stood, blinking, shaking herself off.  The ebony Wonderbolt stared at us, her eyes wide, her face openly displaying her internal conflict, expressions of confusion, dismay and revulsion chasing each other across her features (the few we could really see).
 - I just wish I was really there to see it. Yeah, in the actual Everfucked Forest, being threatened to death by just about ANYTHING, this alone would have been worth it.

(the sort that would come with its own notepad and quill, a little voice told me)
 - Awww, can I call her Smartypants from now on? :3

Without S.A.T.S., hitting an erratically moving target was damn hard, but I wasn’t fresh out of the Stable anymore.  I had lots of practice.
 - Ah, so nice to see how the characters have 'improved' with time.

Something blue shot down out of the sky.  The forest exploded.  The shockwave slammed into me, making my insides feel like jelly as it picked Velvet and Xenith up off the ground and hurled us all brutally forward.  A ring of crackling, electrified black smoke followed the shockwave, as did the roar emanating from the mushroom-like cloud that rose up behind us.
 - OH FUUUUUU- The Buccaneer Blaze! Shock and Awe indeed.

…be awesome.  Yes.  That worked.
 - ...Am I going to like this? ...Why yes, yes I will, possibly more than anything.

That spell came from Life Bloom!  That meant he was okay, and we had now taken down two of the Wonderbolts.  I felt the urge to cry out in elation.
 - Sticking to the plan never felt so good.

“She… does this a lot?” Life Bloom whispered, appearing at my side, surprised by Velvet’s aid to the enemy.
 - Of all the ponies in this team, it's Velvet who gets this most often XD and for good reason.

A moment later, the world behind us exploded in a fiery mushroom cloud.  The smoky ring of electrified stormclouds struck us, lightning sizzling across my body, making me convulse.
 - Of all the possible battle moves... this one's a real nightmare, isn't it?

The tree was one of those wrapped in grotesque, bulging patches of blackish moss.  And one of those patches, roughly the size and vaguely the shape of a pony, was ripping itself off of the tree.
 - The horrors truly never stop. From the looks of it, this also seems like a NV reference, but I only got a hunch from the writing style, nothing else :p

And frankly, I have my own plans for the little unicorn you are tracking…” Fuck me.
 - Yeah, this can't bode well.

“First rule?” a Wonderbolt buck asked.
 - LOL, is it a pegasi thing?

Oh.  Clever stallion.
 - He surely doesn't fuck around... at least not figuratively so. Hah!

KILL THE UNICORN.
 - Tears are flowing as I write this, Kkat why, how do you do this to me?

Nope!  I pulled Little Macintosh away from Velvet Remedy, firing instead at the alicorn inside the shield.  Not gonna happen!
BLAM!  BLAM!  BLAM!  BLAM!  BLAM!  BLAM!
 - The epic, it was too much for my eyes.

The intensity of my trembling jumped an order of magnitude, my mind filled with violation, pain and rage.   Lowering my head, spitting at the ground, I let out a primal scream.
 - Once again, I can't properly express with words the sheer force and magnitude of emotions you are able to convey, with mere words at that.

What kind of morons would wander the Wasteland without each having their own load of them?
 - Whoops! :p

“An’ be careful,” Calamity warned between fits of coughing.  “When the shield goes down… this fire…”  He collapsed in a hacking fit that sounded like he was trying to get rid of his lungs through his muzzle.  Reggie nodded sagely and flew off.
 - Good gracious Kkat, first the brain swelling, now the fire burst? You do research your stuff throught and through, that's for sure.

The little pony in my head was screaming at me to launch it to the moon.
 - But wait! Hellhounds don't even like bananas!.... oh s***, it's the same thing.

Wait... (be smart!)  …I’d seen this before.  Places like this.  In a dream.
 - Yay, Zecora's cottage! Also, forget the Checkov's daughter thing. He'd just marry you.

My hoof hit my face.  Perfect.  The one group of hellhounds in the entire damned Wasteland that might be friendly, and the Enclave went in and fucked with their heads.
 - Of all the worse things that could happen...

“uh, folks.  Ya better take a look at this…”
 - Oh, can it be the Wonderbolts already? Stay tuned for another thrilling episode!