How the Salaf (Pious Predecessors) Raised Their Children?

How the Salaf (Pious Predecessors) Raised Their Children?

On the subject of raising children, Ali ibn Abi Taalib (may Allah be pleased with him) said,
"Play with them for the first 7 years (of their life); then teach them for the next 7 years; then advise them for the next 7 years (and after that).”

➡️ First 7 Years – Play with them
In the first 7 years, your goal is to build a strong connection with your child. This is the foundation, the base from which your relationship with them grows. If this is rock solid, the remaining years will be much easier.
If this foundation forms poorly, the next years will be more challenging.
If you have young children, this (first 7 years) is the time to roll up your sleeves and invest, heavily, in yours and their future.
In fact, you will be rewarded for all the righteous progeny that survives you, not just children, until the Day of Judgement. Play with your children, teach them Islam, teach them to have the best of manners but make the learning easy and don’t be harsh with them.

➡️ 7-14 Years – Teach them
Once children reach 7, they are ready to learn. This is the time they are sponges, ready to soak up anything and everything you tell them, teach them, show them, and do in front of them. If you built that solid foundation in ages 0-7,
they are now more than willing and happy to learn from you.

This is the time to teach them everything — Aqeedah (creed/faith), halaal (permissible) and haraam (impermissible), fiqh (legislation), all the things they need to know to survive throughout their life. Qur’an and seerah (the biography of the Prophet ﷺ) are also very important; as one prominent tabi’een said, “we learned seerah (frequently and in details) from our parents the way we learned Qur’an.”

We should attach our hearts to the ulama (Scholars) and we should see them and take our children to see them, before they pass away.
Make your children tulaab (righteous religious students) and take them to the masjid and keep them from bad company. When they go to the masjid, tell them to always take their notepads even if there’s no lesson on, just in case they hear a benefit. You shouldn’t just leave them on the streets or schools, rather you give them Tarbiyyah (education and upbringing for the development of people) of the Sunnah and the staying away from Bidah (religious innovation). You shouldn’t always keep them inside the home.

We should tell our children to read biographies of the Salaf (the Pious Predecessors) and then write about it and ask why they wrote those points especially.
The more the children read these books, they will become more encouraged by them and the Salaf will become their role models. Also ask the children the names of the imams (leaders) of the Salaf.

Teach them sports too, for Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Teach your children Swimming, Archery and Horseback riding.”
They gain many benefits from it, including physical fitness, learning teamwork, and sportsmanship.
Abu Bakr Sijistanee compiled his first book at 11, regarding the biography of a great imam, and his father was pleased with that.
Imam Ahmad would read the Musnad of his, which had the collection of 40,000 Ahadith (narrations of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ) to his children for 12 years.
Imam al-Bukhari began compiling his Sahih at the age of 16 and finished at the age of 32.

➡️Age 15 – The Final 7 Years – Advise them
Once your children hit 14, they are probably already mukallaf (full adults Islamically, and accountable for their actions) — this happens at puberty, or at age 15 at the latest.
At this age, you are mostly out of the picture. Children achieve independence; their personalities manifest; they look more to their peers than their parents and families.
During these critical years, befriend them, advise them, and do what you can; understand that they are then full adults, and the choices are their choices to make and be accountable for, right or wrong.

If you worked hard during the last two periods of 7 years, you will already be that trusted confidant, that advisor, that go-to person when they need help or advice.
Be part of their lives, and advise them as best you can.