A New Dynamic Duo is Made and More Problems are Caused

\-===START===-/
What was the last thing you're doing?
Lavira_Dyenus
talking with johnny while requesting the rhinos to see if making a prosthetic leg for him is possible
Sorodin
The rhinos wholeheartedly agree, and start to work on it!
!roll 1d20+12
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+12 --> [ 1d20=17 ] | {29}
Sorodin
!roll 1d20-3
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20-3 --> [ 1d20=2 ] | {-1}
Johnny
"..."
Lavira_Dyenus
"Credit where credit is due, these rhinos are fast workers"
Johnny
"i can see that... impressive but i can't tell what they're doing?"
"wait... NO EXPLOSIVES!"
Sorodin
Diplomacy
Johnny
!roll 1d20+4
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=20 ] | {24}
Sorodin
They reluctantly agree.
* Johnny huff "good"
* Lavira_Dyenus shakes her head at the rhinos and gives Johnny a small smile of approval for his diplomacy
Lavira_Dyenus
"I'm surprised you managed to convince them"
I turn to the rhinos and ask, "So how long do you think it will take to create the prosthetic?"
Sorodin
They hand you the completed prosthetic.
* Lavira_Dyenus makes a surprised and impressed expression
Lavira_Dyenus
"It's impossible to doubt your skills with machinery, that's for sure"
"Would you help us attach it to my friend here?
Sorodin
Gain PROSTHETIC LEG, giving you +2 to your move speed, and +1 to damage on all rolls involving kicking!
Johnny now has two legs.
LaviraDyenus
"Thank goodness that went smoothly"
* Johnny bounces from one foot to the other testing the weight "damn this is well made and doesn't explode too"
LaviraDyenus
"It's like I said"
"their technological aptitude can't be understated"
"So, let's continue through the base, shall we?"
Johnny
"yeah, sorry for slowing you down before. lead the way"
LaviraDyenus
I look around the hangar/big room for any doors I previously failed to notice
Sorodin
It looks like there's one on the side of the nuke.
LaviraDyenus
"Found a door, follow me"
I head through the door with Johnny
Johnny
"of course"
wait a door on the bomb?
Sorodin
Yes.
The door is leading into the interior workings of the nuke
This could not go wrong in any way possible.
Johnny
"radiation issues?"
LaviraDyenus
"The nuke is still under construction, so I believe radiation won't be a big issue, if at all"
Johnny
"i hope you're right"
LaviraDyenus
"And radiation is only an issue after detonation, I believe"
Johnny
i take a look around the inside of the nuke
Sorodin
Do both of you enter the nuke?
LaviraDyenus
yes
Johnny
^
Sorodin
You both enter the nuke, and soro has no idea how nukes work!!!!!
So, it's a cramped hallway bit!
Johnny
"this looks about right... right?"
LaviraDyenus
"I'd assume so. I've never seen or been inside a nuke"
I take lead and walk through the nuke's cramped hallway bit
Sorodin
You walk for a while, before entering a medium-sized circular arena bit.
...holy fuck how big is this nuke???
LaviraDyenus
I try crouching down before anything can notice me, quietly signaling for johnny to do the same
Johnny
"are they compensating for something or just trying to match Zeus i wonder hehe"
* Johnny does the same
* LaviraDyenus whispers "let's have that discussion later"
* Johnny whispers back "okay sounds like a fun one"
Sorodin
A second later, a whirling tornado comes blasting through the front wall, finishing it's spin with a flourish.
When it stops and the wind dispels, you can see a humanoid male, made purely out of glowing white-and-blue energy.
Johnny
"that's my thing you stealer"
Sorodin
He has like a fucking tux on and stuff
* Johnny examines the humanoid
Sorodin
...
uh okay
Johnny
!roll 1d20+3
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+3 --> [ 1d20=12 ] | {15}
Johnny
has he seen him/knows him
Sorodin
it's walking around and examining parts of the nukes, before throwing them out through the wall.
No, he hasn't.
!roll 1d20+5
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+5 --> [ 1d20=9 ] | {14}
LaviraDyenus
I try staying out of sight
!roll 1d20+10
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+10 --> [ 1d20=11 ] | {21}
Sorodin
!roll 1d20+5
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+5 --> [ 1d20=2 ] | {7}
Johnny
does same
Sorodin
Yeah you're unseen/
Johnny
!roll 1d20+4
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=9 ] | {13}
Sorodin
!roll 1d20+5
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+5 --> [ 1d20=14 ] | {19}
LaviraDyenus
Before the being can notice me I go in for a surprise attack
Sorodin
Unfortunately, Johnny DOES get noticed.
LaviraDyenus
!roll 2#1d20+9
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 2#1d20+9 -->  | [ 1d20=16 ]{25}, [ 1d20=11 ]{20}
Sorodin
Hit.
LaviraDyenus
!roll 2d6+12 POWERSTRIKE
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 2d6+12 --> [ 2d6=9 ] | {21}
Sorodin
You slice a gash across his face, golden blood flowing out.
His eyes widen, before he turns towards you, two blades in hand, and snarls.
Roll Initiative.
LaviraDyenus
!roll 1d20+6 "Johnny get ready to fight!"
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=9 ] | {15}
Johnny
!roll 1d20+3
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+3 --> [ 1d20=9 ] | {12}
* Johnny pulls out knife "got it"
Sorodin
!roll 1d20+6
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=6 ] | {12}
Sorodin
Alright the turn order is this
Lavira > Johnny > The dude who's name im not supposed to say
LaviraDyenus
No time to waste. I slice at the being again
!roll 1d20+9
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+9 --> [ 1d20=15 ] | {24}
LaviraDyenus
!roll 2d6+12 POWERSTRIKE
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 2d6+12 --> [ 2d6=5 ] | {17}
Sorodin
You hit once more, and he takes a step backwards.
Johnny's turn?
LaviraDyenus
"Johnny, now you!"
end turn
Johnny
i throw a knife at the Breath wanna be/actually is
!roll 1d20+4
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=12 ] | {16}
Sorodin
Miss
Minor or move?
Johnny
move away from Lavira so they can't both be hit (15 ft keeping the same distance from the dude)
minor to intimidate
Johnny
"nice 'tornado' but all i'm seeing is leaves move"
!roll 1d20+4
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=3 ] | {7}
Sorodin
No intimidation
Johnny
"dude is more poker face than my dad"
end turn
Sorodin
Ventus tilts his head, and then SPINS TO WIN!!!!!! on...
!roll 1d2
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d2 --> [ 1d2=1 ] | {1}
Sorodin
Lavira!
!roll 1d20+7
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+7 --> [ 1d20=15 ] | {22}
LaviraDyenus
block won't help
hit
Sorodin
!roll 2d6+6
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 2d6+6 --> [ 2d6=9 ] | {15}
Sorodin
Take 15 damage as you get tornado'd around.
Johnny
"LAVIRA YOU OKAY!?"
LaviraDyenus
"I'm fine! Focus on our enemy"
Sorodin
End turn.
LaviraDyenus
I retaliate and slice at him
!roll 1d20+9
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+9 --> [ 1d20=20 ] | {29}
Johnny
"gg"
LaviraDyenus
!roll 2d6+12 CRITICAL POWERSTRIKE
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 2d6+12 --> [ 2d6=10 ] | {22}
Sorodin
C R I T I C A L
LaviraDyenus
22 x 2 = 44
Sorodin
You slice into him, and he gives a corrupted, warbled howl kind of thing.
It's like a wolf howl if you ran it through a bunch of filters.
LaviraDyenus
"You're up again, Johnny!"
end turn
Johnny
Throw
!roll 1d20+4
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=9 ] | {13}
Johnny
"motherfucker!"
Sorodin
miss again
Johnny
intimidation
"howl all you want your last breath comes soon"
!roll 1d20+4
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=4 ] | {8}
Sorodin
The breath puns.
I am dying.
However, Ventus is not.
Sorodin
End turn?
Johnny
moves closer to 'Ventus' by 10ft end turn
Sorodin
Ventus' eyes light up as you approach.
!roll 6#1d20+5
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 6#1d20+5 -->  | [ 1d20=17 ]{22}, [ 1d20=15 ]{20}, [ 1d20=7 ]{12}, [ 1d20=15 ]{20}, [ 1d20=3 ]{8}, [ 1d20=15 ]{20}
Sorodin
How many break AC?
LaviraDyenus
all but 2
Johnny
^
4 hit Johnny
Sorodin
!roll 4#1d6+3
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 4#1d6+3 -->  | [ 1d6=2 ]{5}, [ 1d6=4 ]{7}, [ 1d6=2 ]{5}, [ 1d6=5 ]{8}
Sorodin
Take 25 damage.
He takes out some knives, and goes to town on Johnny, slicing faster than you can imagine.
Sorodin
Lavira's turn.
Lavira_Dyenus
I continue slicing at the being
!roll 1d20+9
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+9 --> [ 1d20=6 ] | {15}
Sorodin
Miss.
Lavira_Dyenus
Next best thing, I try blinding him with Light Refraction
!roll 1d20
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20 --> [ 1d20=20 ] | {20}
Johnny
gg
Sorodin
yeah he's blinded.
Lavira_Dyenus
end turn
Sorodin
Johnny's turn.
Johnny
i back up to 30ft "yeah not good me getting close to him, can't take that much again"
!roll 1d20+4 throw
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=7 ] | {11}
Johnny
!roll 1d20+4
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=11 ] | {15}
Johnny
mother of christ these rolls are great aren't they :)
Sorodin
100% quality rolls.
Johnny
can we get a new dice bot pls :'(
i think it's biased :P
Sorodin
:P
Anyway, end turn?
Johnny
retcon crit blind = extra advantage
!roll 1d20+4
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=13 ] | {17}
Sorodin
Hit.
Johnny
!roll 2d6+6
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 2d6+6 --> [ 2d6=12 ] | {18}
Sorodin
The knife flies into his face, and he pulls it out annoyed.
"Just CUT that OUT won't YOU?"
Johnny
"YOU CAN TALK?!"
Sorodin
"Can't YOU?"
Johnny
"you don't have a mouth and didn't talk this entire time except for that howl a bit ago"
Sorodin
"Maybe IT was BECAUSE you GUYS were FUCKING stabbing ME?"
Johnny
"i'm sorry for my friend attacking you but you surprised us when you bursted in and in this game it's kill or be killed"
Lavira_Dyenus
"I have to second that"
Johnny
"i can bandage you up some so let's stop fighting okay"
Sorodin
Diplomacy.
Johnny
!roll 1d20+4
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=7 ] | {11}
Sorodin
!roll 1d20
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20 --> [ 1d20=6 ] | {6}
Sorodin
"Under THE white FLAG of TRUCE, I HOPE?"
Lavira_Dyenus
"I'll lay down my blade if you're willing to as well"
Johnny
"um... can i have my knife back... it was my dad's before he died?"
Sorodin
He hesitates for a second, and then tosses you your knife.
Not exactly safe, but you manage to catch it anyways.
Lavira_Dyenus
"Who exactly are you? You look like one of Zeus' servants"
"Given the lightning, wind, and storm-related appearance"
Johnny
"also very Breathy"
"and thank you for giving it back it means a lot to me"
Sorodin
"The ARCHAGENT, actually."
"I WAS sent HERE since WE didn't REALLY feel LIKE getting BLOWN up TODAY."
Johnny
"okay Lavira this is what i'm saying about Zeus not being like Eris and maybe not being bad"
Lavira_Dyenus
"I see."
Johnny
"what's your name and is it okay if i bandage us all up while we talk?"
Lavira_Dyenus
"Since you clearly are more knowledgeable and reasonable than any of the rhinos, what exactly happened to trigger this endless storm and the conflict with the rhinos?"
Sorodin
"The STORM is A defense MECHANISM to KEEP the LOCATION of OUR temples SECRET."
"We're NOT exactly SURE how, BUT the RHINOS managed TO locate ONE."
Lavira_Dyenus
"All I've learned thus far is that Zeus struck down Lucretia and the storm followed."
"I'm guessing these temples are important to you and/or the rhinos"
Sorodin
"Lucretia GOT hit BY a STRAY arrow."
"She WAS holding A torch AT the TIME."
* Johnny throws his arms in the air "FUCKING CALLED IT!"
Sorodin
"The RHINOS thought THAT the FLAMES were LIGHTNING."
Lavira_Dyenus
"Who loosed the arrow, and why was Lucretia holding a torch?"
Johnny
"night time?"
Sorodin
"It WAS the MIDDLE of THE night."
Johnny
"called it"
Sorodin
"We're NOT entirely SURE who FIRED the ARROW."
"We THINK it WAS one OF the OUTER clans."
Johnny
"but yeah your name and can i get bandaging people?"
* Lavira_Dyenus shrugs her shoulders and concedes the logical victory to Johnny
Sorodin
"Ventus."
"Nice TO meet YOU."
Johnny
"nice to meet you Ventus. i'm Johnny"
Lavira_Dyenus
"My apologies for the damage inflicted"
* Johnny puts his hand out for a shake
Lavira_Dyenus
"I'm Lavira. It's a pleasure to meet you under less hostile circumstances"
Sorodin
Ventus shakes Johnny's hand.
Johnny
"k since i'm not getting answers i'm just gonna bandage people up that cool?"
Sorodin
"That WOULD indeed BE cool."
"...I FEEL as IF there WAS a PUN coming UP."
"Fuck."
Johnny
"cool breeze?"
Lavira_Dyenus
"Back to the relevant topic, what are the outer clans?"
Johnny
"Horror terrors?"
Sorodin
"The OUTER clans ARE boarmen WHO live ON the DARK side OF the PLANET."
Johnny
!roll 1d20+4 medicine
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=3 ] | {7}
Sorodin
"They've NEVER really BEEN too SOCIAL."
Johnny
"hands are a bit shakey sorry"
Sorodin
"It's FINE>"
In fact, the cause for you fumbling that so badly was the sudden lurch in the ground.
Almost like the nuke was being launched.
Johnny
"SHIT SHIT SHIT! VEN CAN YOU DO THE WINDY THING!?"
Sorodin
"Please EXPLAIN what THE windy THING is?"
Lavira_Dyenus
"Just blow some holes in the nuke so we can escape!"
Johnny
"the nuke just launched and we need you to divert it since i'm running on empty and get us out pls"
Sorodin
"Oh, ALRIGHT. I CAN do THAT."
Lavira_Dyenus
"I need your help in safely getting down, since I'm the only one here who can't fly"
Johnny
"pls do i'll help if i can"
Sorodin
He extends a hand, blowing holes like everywhere.
You guys are a bit above the ground, but you could probably land safely with a 19 or so acrobatics roll.
Or you could try to dismantle the nuke from the inside.
Up to you guys, really.
Johnny
"VEN HELP ME LIFT LAVIRA TO THE GROUND"
Lavira_Dyenus
"Ventus, can you help me get down? Johnny can fly, so he'll be fine"
Johnny
"we can both fly"
Sorodin
"I'm FAIRLY sure THAT if I exited THE missile I would BE shot DOWN almost IMMEDIATELY."
"I CAN stay IN here IF you TWO want TO head DOWN."
Lavira_Dyenus
"well, shit. We've no choice but to jump then. If you can, try and dismantle this nuke while we do so"
Johnny
"Lavira hold on tight"
Lavira_Dyenus
"Got it"
Johnny
"i'm gonna help slow you to the ground"
Lavira_Dyenus
I grab onto Johnny and jump with him
Sorodin
Johnny, roll Athletics.
* Johnny was gonna carry Lavira bridal style
Johnny
this is before Jumping btw
!roll 1d20+1
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+1 --> [ 1d20=13 ] | {14}
Sorodin
Alright then Lavira roll Acro
Lavira_Dyenus
!roll 1d20+8
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+8 --> [ 1d20=14 ] | {22}
Sorodin
Okay, you guys land safely on the ground with little to no injuries.
* Johnny shouts up to the rocket "VEN YOU CAN SHRED IT NOW!"
Lavira_Dyenus
Where are the rhinos? They need to know what happened and why they're idiots
Sorodin
They're out in front, watching the nuke.
Lavira_Dyenus
Is there computer terminal controlling the nuke in sight?
* Johnny goes over to the rhinos with Lavira "OH BOY do we have a story to tell you guys"
Sorodin
There is not.
"Gimme a second, friend of Lavirdjajia, we're watching the nuke!"
Johnny
"that nukes shouldn't be flying at Zeus"
Lavira_Dyenus
"Contact whoever is controlling the nuke and tell them to divert its course"
Sorodin
He's too enthralled watching the nuke to pay you any attention.
Lavira_Dyenus
I slap him upside his thick head with the pommel of my rapier to get his attention
Sorodin
Occasionally he absentmindedly says "bomb" but you dont think it has anything to do with what you're saying.
Roll Strength
Lavira_Dyenus
!roll 1d20
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20 --> [ 1d20=15 ] | {15}
Johnny
"WAIT A GOSH DARN SECOND!"
Lavira_Dyenus
"Zeus didn't attack Lucretia, it was an arrow I think was fired from the Outer Clans"
Johnny
"did NONE of you check your leader's body when she died!?"
Sorodin
He recoils.
"Autopsy on leaders is prohibited!"
Lavira_Dyenus
"Why, exactly?"
Johnny
"did you not see an ARROW pointing out of them!?"
Sorodin
"It was Zeus' lightning!"
"We didn't even have to check, we saw it from a mile away!"
Johnny
"did anyone go to her body?"
"YOU WERE A MILE AWAY!"
Lavira_Dyenus
"I'm going to challenge you right now that Lucretia wasn't killed by lightning"
"Can her body be found?"
Johnny
"the flame was a TORCH cause it was THE DEAD OF NIGHT did NONE of you go to her body?!"
Sorodin
"Yeah, it was in that nuke."
"Cerimonial stuff and shit."
Johnny
"WHY!"
Lavira_Dyenus
"How did you fail to check her body while loading it onto the nuke?"
* Johnny flies towards the nuke "VEN THE LEADERS BODY IS IN THE NUKE! THROW IT OUT TO US!"
Sorodin
The nuke has disappeared into the clouds, reaching the height of it's arc...
and then it starts to go down.
Hahahahahaha this land is so fucked.
Lavira_Dyenus
"How did you fail to check her body in the entire time it took you to collect it and load it onto the nuke?"
Sorodin
"We were wearing blindfolds."
Lavira_Dyenus
"How did you fail to even consider that the cloud itself can't be nuked? It's not physical matter!"
Sorodin
"Lucretia always said that it was better to remember her as she lived than as she died."
* Johnny from the sky "STUPID IDIOTS!"
Sorodin
"So we wear blindfolds to help!"
Lavira_Dyenus
"And how did Lucretia live?"
"What lifestyle led you all to be so ignorant and devoid of logic?"
Johnny
"DID SHE WANNA BE NUKE CREMATED!? DID SHE ASK FOR THAT!?"
Lavira_Dyenus
"Listen here, I'm going to administer a challenge to every single one of your horrifically inept kin. I challenge you all to stop attacking the cloud and try communicating with even one of Zeus' servants" servants"
Johnny
!roll 1d20+3 for trying windy thing
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+3 --> [ 1d20=4 ] | {7}
Johnny
nope he's empty
Sorodin
Nop
"But... we need to blow up the storm!!!"
Lavira_Dyenus
"No."
"You don't"
"I challenge you and every one of your brothers, sisters, and other kin to try something other than attacking the storm"
"I challenge you to try communicating with Zeus and his servants"
* Johnny flies back down and grabs the rhino by whatever he can "LISTEN BUB ZEUS LIVES OFF CONFLICT YOU DON'T FIGHT YOU WIN SEE!"
Lavira_Dyenus
"I challenge you to think beyond your pitifully limited mindset"
Johnny
!roll 1d20+4 diplomacy
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=9 ] | {13}
Lavira_Dyenus
"I challenge you to try using common sense and investigating the Outer Clans, who are most likely responsible for this war"
Sorodin
One of them holds up a finger to protest, but then reconsiders and lowers it.
One of them yells up to the clouds.
"HEY ZEUS, CAN YOU HEAR US??"
!roll 1d20
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20 --> [ 1d20=17 ] | {17}
* Johnny facepalms "he can't hear you over the nuke in the sky"
Sorodin
He yells so loudly it can almost be heard over the sound of the nuke exploding.
Much sooner than it should have.
Johnny
"FUCKING SHIT"
Lavira_Dyenus
"Johnny, wait!"
"Do not go to the explosion site unless you want to die from the blast and radiation"
Sorodin
Do you guys look at the explosion site?
Lavira_Dyenus
I look at it while shielding my eyes
* Johnny johnny closes his eyes and covers lavira
Sorodin
You look at the site of the explosion, and you see that it made contact with something just above the cloud layer.
Lavira_Dyenus
"That is not good at all"
Sorodin
The outline of a glimmering gold temple-like structure shines in the sky for a bit, before it starts slowly descending.
Lavira_Dyenus
"Listen here"
"Unless I tell you or any other rhinos to, you will NOT go to that temple"
Johnny
"no more"
"ANY OF YOU DISOBEY HER AND I CHOP YOUR LIMBS OFF BEFORE HANGING YOU!"
!roll 1d20+4
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20+4 --> [ 1d20=10 ] | {14}
Sorodin
!roll 1d20
@Kaiserbot[Dice]
rolled 1d20 --> [ 1d20=17 ] | {17}
Lavira_Dyenus
"Johnny, that's frankly unnecessary. I don't want these rhinos to become hostile"
Sorodin
None of them listen to you, and they all go charging in the direction of the temple, yelling and brandishing assorted weapons.
==END==