Hey so idk how to say this, but I want to put this out here. Lately I just haven’t been feeling well about this mod, at least for me. For the past 2 weeks this mod has just become more and more of unfun for me.

First of all for the next month and a half I’m going to be extremely busy. I have SAT testing, State testing, AP testing, ACT testing, and then finals all within May and early June. It’s going to be stressful 1 and a half months for me and I just don’t know if I’m going to be able to keep doing this while trying to study for all of these tests.

Second, it just seems like I’m becoming more and more less serious. Most people just see me as meme or as not important. No one respects my opinion and I’m usually blamed for or a scapegoat if something goes wrong. I usually give my input on stuff, but we always seem to do the opposite or they tell me that my ideas and stuff don’t matter. They usually just go on without me. Yes ik I may not do a lot (and I kinda boss people around a bit) but recently I have coded over 50 events for the past 2 weeks. I’m really trying to get back into coding, and I’m trying to learn more complex coding but it’s just that stuff in my life is becoming more and more up and I don’t have a lot of time.  But if I’m not taken seriously or I’m seen as a meme or as a scapegoat for people to blame, then it’s not fun for me.  I mean they do know there is a person on the other side that has a mental state right?

Lastly, it’s gotten to the point where I get anxiety if I even go on discord or think about the mod. That’s why lately I have barley been on here talking or stuff. I usually just avoid discord or the mod for a bit and just relax and play games or something. The way the last 2 weeks have gone and how I have been seen has really impacted me about the mod here. Im thinking I’m not taken seriously here anymore and that no one cares what i think or anything. (Also it’s later here and I’m tired so I might be a little more harsh here) there maybe a different story but this is just what I have seen over the past 2-3 weeks, and I really don’t want this getting worse for me mentally. What do you think of all of this, and please don’t release this to anyone without asking me first.