Spaced Elves

LOCATION: KENNEDY SPACE CENTER
DATE: 0 ANNO COUNO+25 DAYS
SUBJECT: COMMANDER ANONSTRONG
//LOG.BEGIN
>Our apologies Commander, the recorder wasn't on. Please start from the top.
>"From the top, alright. So, Like I said, I was doing EVA maneuvers to check the integrity of the heat shield of the Soyuz that'd just brought up Anders and Cherenkov. They were in the access corridor unloading supplies. Autumn and Mishka were in the control module and Laika was in the french module patching holes from a micrometeor."
>That's in line with what we were seeing on the ground, please continue commander.
>"I was moving along the exterior of the number one hab module and about to decouple to the next harness point when the Soyuz and the number one umbilical explosively decompressed. I could see a shimmering pane.. kinda like a mirror or maybe a window when seen through a heat haze cutting laterally about midway through the umbilical. In that pane I could see the remains of a building, some people running around in a panic and material being sucked through into space. Also Anders was hanging on to the primary support beam of the building."
>"After a few moments, the pane appeared to fold in on itself and vanish. After that I could clearly see the Soyuz spinning off into a decaying orbit with the hatch shut."
>You are certain you saw Anders inside the pane?
>"Yes. Swear to god, he was in there when it collapsed."
>Please continue.
>"So, I start assessing things, Miska jumps on the coms asking what the fuck just happened, I tell her, 'the fuck you think happened. Umbilical just exploded, dunno where Anders or Cherenkov are'. At the time it hadn't really registered what I'd seen, then I get grabbed by this guy. Thought it was Anders at first considering he did that crazy exo training with that unit."
>Please refrain from continuing on that line of discussion Commander.
>"Understood. So I turn to see who all grabbed me, cause it wasn't just a bump from debris, it was a grab. And I see this guy, olive skin, long ears, flowing robes. And he's got this girl with him, by the hand. Both of them have their weird halo of light around them kinda like a bubble almost
>I can tell they're struggling. Girl looks out, guy looks desperate, so I just do what comes instinctively and haul ass back to the airlock and drag them in, pressurize, and get them inside."
>"Once we have air and I pulled my helmet loose the guy just grabs my head, and I can.. I dunno feel him sifting through my mind, all the while he's shouting something. After a few moments of this, I dunno if something in my head clicks or he figured out the language barrier, but it goes from 'Mani callerar' something something to 'human why have you attacked us!' like someone flipped a switch or something."
>"negotiations weren't easy after that, didn't help that Autumn decked him... then again I woulds'a too if I'd been the one to open the hatch and see my commander struggling with this weird guy no one's ever seen before after a module just exploded."
>"After a few minutes of tense discussions we were able to convey just what the situation was to them and back down here, and then it was just a matter of, once we got permission to de-ass the situation, cram everyone into the number two soyuz and land off Pensacola."
>Thankyou commander, we might need to redo this for posterity since someone in Washington my take exception to your language but I relish the thought at keeping phrasing like "de-asse" the situation in official documentation. That's all for now. Please let Councilator Rho know we'd like to interview him next and get his take on things.
//LOG.END