daily pastebin goal


a guest Dec 11th, 2011 8,749 Never
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  1. >walk into Gamestop
  2. >ask for a copy of Atelier Totori
  3. >"What?"
  4. >spaghetti slowly drips from my pockets
  5. >oh god not again
  6. >face gets red
  7. >"Please give me a copy of Atelier Totori right now."
  8. >"I don't know what that is. What platform is it on?"
  9. >struggling to contain my embarrassment
  10. >clenching asscheeks together to hold in my shit
  11. >meanwhile spaghetti is flowing out of my pockets
  12. >voice reduced to a mumble
  13. >"have money please alterlier toroti give money please game"
  14. >"Are you ok?"
  15. >shit breaches through my asscheeks
  16. >propelled forward at 60mph
  17. >crash through the Gamestop employee's counter
  18. >he's holding on to me for dear life
  19. >all the while spaghetti is flowing out of my pockets like fumes
  20. >crash through the entire row of buildings in the strip mall, broken glass shards in my face
  22. >Gamestop employee is covered in shit and spaghetti
  23. >my pocket rocket shows no signs of stopping
  24. >he tilts me backwards
  25. >the sheer force of my shit has reached 650mph, we are now propelling upwards
  26. >the spaghetti and shit intertwines and falls down to earth in glorious yellow and brown streams as we head towards the stratosphere
  27. >children below frolic in the mess falling from my anus
  28. >the g-force is causing my asscheeks to flap vigorously and create a gale
  29. >spaghetti and shit blowing through the air on the planet below
  30. >3 miles upwards now
  31. >Gamestop employee has died from lack of oxygen, his body falls to the surface below and is shredded by the force of my shit
  32. >my transformation is almost complete
  33. >as I leave the atmosphere my bear hands sprout and my tail grows, acting as a rudder
  34. >steer myself across the cosmos with my gleaming shit and spaghetti trail
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