Party's Over

"AAUGHHH!!"
The ponies jumped as Rarity broke the silence with a signature scream.
"Land's sake, girl!" Applejack snapped. "She's gonna hear ya' all the way from Sugarcube Corner!"
"There's hay in my mane," Rarity moaned, clearly restless from waiting. "Pick it out for me- wait! Don't touch me with those hooves! Fluttershy, dear-"
"Shhh!" Twilight interrupted. "-or we won't be able to hear them coming! Don't forget why we're here!"
Rarity looked up at Twilight's cheap party hat and winced. "Ugh, how could I..." she asked beneath her breath.
Recovering from the outburst, Twilight trotted over to the tastiest smelling table in the barn to spellcheck the cake for the 7th time. "Happy Birthday, Pinkie Pie!" the frosting exclaimed, exactly as it had 26 minutes earlier. Even she could feel her patience dwindling.
"What's taking Rainbow so long?" she thought to herself. "You'd think the fastest pony in Equestria would-"

Twilight stopped mid-critique. Finally, she heard hooves in the near distance.
"Places! They're here!" Twilight jumped into position with the other three party guests as she prepared to finally greet the birthday girl.

As she eagerly listened to the steps approaching the barn door, the attentive pony noticed that only one set of hooves could be heard, and there were certainly no pegasi wings flapping. Another sound could also be heard behind the hoofsteps, something sliding along the dirt. Was Rainbow Dash pulling Pinkie behind her? Was something wrong? Twilight didn't have enough time to question it as she quickly replaced her quizzical expression with a grin and took a deep breath with her friends.

"SURPRISE!"

The door opened to reveal a familiar face, grinning from ear to ear. The pink pony gasped in fervor.
"A party!" Pinkie Pie joyously shouted. Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Twilight Sparkle all stepped towards the special guest to give her a long overdue birthday hug...
... but they were still one pony short. Twilight halted her approach.
"Where-"

"Aaaaand... I brought presents!" Pinkie added excitedly.

This time everypony stopped, stunned by what they just heard. Twilight looked to her friends to find they were all just as confused as her. Turning back to the Element of Laughter, she now understood what the dragging sound from earlier was, and what had taken her so long to get here. Pinkie had emptied a bag of flour, filled the sack with gifts, and pulled it all the way to Sweet Apple Acres. Bringing presents on her own birthday? This was the definition of a surprise party.

"Madame le Flour helped me carry these aaallll the way from Sugarcube Corner!" Confetti erupted from the sack as Pinkie quickly placed a gift before each of her flabbergasted friends.
"Well, go on!" She motioned for her friends to undo the ribbons she'd tied, dying to see the look on everypony's faces. At a near-loss for words, Twilight trotted past her friends to approach Pinkie Pie.
"Pinkie," Twilight started. "You really didn't have t-"

"AAUGHHH!!"
Again, the ponies were all met with a comically loud scream from Rarity. Twilight whipped her head around to see what the fuss was this time, but she quickly wished she hadn't.

Fluttershy and AJ stood in absolute shock as they looked down to the opened present at Rarity's hooves. Rarity looked as if she was about to cry, though not tears of joy. Placed neatly inside the unwarapped box were a pair of mangled wings, undoubtedly from a pegasus pony. The feathers were sky blue, and the bases of each wing were tainted in a rich red. Around the tip of one of the severed limbs hung a glittery label with a gift message, though reading the label was likely the last thing on anypony's mind. Speechless was an understatement.

While Twilight struggled to process what she was seeing, she felt something cold and wet touch her back hoof. She jumped and turned back around to her own unopened gift. A thick, red substance was seeping from the box, and it had been slowly trickling through the hay on the ground to her position. An unmatched feeling of dread washed over Twilight's face as the horrifying pieces clicked together.

"Oh, duh! I almost forgot MY present!" Pinkie laughed as she reached back into the sack of flour. Confetti flew from the bag one more time as the party pony slowly pulled out her own gift. It wasn't boxed, but rather wrapped in just a single ribbon. Applejack recognized it immediately, as it actually belonged to the acreage. It was seldom used, so she hadn't even noticed it was missing. Its intended purpose was for cutting down trees, but the now blood-stained chains told a different story. AJ shakily removed her hat and held it to her chest as she felt tears begin to well up.

As her friends each struggled to grasp the situation, Pinkie looked back down to the deflated burlap sack. To think, she was just serving cake to the fine Madame not 30 minutes earlier. Oh well, no matter. What's done is done.
"Y'know," Pinkie started, "cutting your friends open and emptying their insides out actually gets easier the more you do it."

Pinkie Pie was now the only pony in the barn smiling as the sound of her chainsaw's engine filled the room after just a few revs.

"Let's party!"