Thread 24: Stories 91-105

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>SA
“Luna.”

~~~~~

The door to Luna's office opened again and as she looked up she blinked in surprise.

“Shining Armor, to what do I owe-”

>Sombra.

The smile on her face vanished and was replaced with a scowl.

“What about that abomination?”

>We need to get to the moon.

“We?”

>Yes, We. Sombra, Pinkie, and I.

“So he's conned you both into helping him?”

>I offered my help, so did Pinkie Pie. He wants to get his body back.

“I am aware of that as you should be aware that I have denied him.”

>Listen, I know you have bad blood between you bu-

“YOU NO NOTHING!”

Her voice resonated off the walls of her chambers as she glared at Shining.

“You know nothing...”

>I know he betrayed and used you.

“And do you know how he did so?”

>... No.

“By using me as a shield from my sister. Using my trust in him to keep her at bay when the first reports of his cruelty started coming in. “Tia, I know him, he would never do such a thing” …I was such a fool.”

>...

“They just kept coming and coming and after a while they stopped. It was only by chance that one of the crystal ponies escaped and came to us... It was then that I realized that he had not just used me as a shield. But also kept me from my purpose.”

>...

“I was to guard their dreams, Shining. He blocked my power so I wouldn't be able to help or realize what he was doing. He took from me, the only joy I had, because I trusted him and shared how dream waking worked. He is a monster.”

>... What about you?

“How dar-”

>What about when you abused your power and turned on those you were meant to protect. Are you a monster too?

“I WAS GIVEN A SECOND CHANCE!”

>Then why won't you give him one!?

“...”

>He is willing to go into the Howling Pit alone, to get his second chance. Please... Let him show you that he's changed.

“... Very well, but I am going with you.”

>Luna, your a Princess, you can't-

“I do not know the state of my realm Shining Armor.”

She frowned in thought.

“I have not been up there since my return... and for a thousand years the Nightmare was free to do as she pleased up there. I am not willing to put you or Pinkamena in danger. It is my duty to do so.”

>I'll go tell Sombra.

“And I shall inform my sister.”

>Thank you, for giving him a second chance.

As he left Luna sighed.

“I hope, for all our sakes, you are correct Shining Armor.”
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NON CANON

Phazon/Space Smooze
----
In the far north, a malicious entity awakens. Fueled by hate and not!phazon, and an insatiable will to dominate and subjugate, it prowls from its smoozy pile.
At first it is shapeless, but a shade. Then it finds a host.
A single splinter of chitin, frozen from ages past.
A husk forms around the blob, taking the shape of a long dead queen.
None shall be safe.
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>Spike
"42"
~~~
"Huh, they really weren't kidding I'd find you here."

>Hey, you feeling okay?

"Yeah, I did hit the harness just before you broke it to give me a resistance boost, so no harm there, hoped playing possum would have snapped you out on your own though."

>I'm sorry...

"Stop beating yourself up... That's what 77, Pinkie, and I are for. ... Okay, so the humor approach isn't working. Look, I'm gonna come straight out: you were wrong to do what you did, but the Queen was wrong in what she had did, and I was wrong for snapping at you."

42 easily tears the cell door off its hinges then sits next to Spike on the bench

"You... Did what you thought was best. For your country. I'm upset because I failed to do my own job for the hive. We drew our lines in the sand a long time ago and we've known for along time that if it came down to a choice between Equestria or The Hive neither of us was going to exactly jump ship for the sake of the other."

>I just... I feel so useless, I couldn't help out against the robots-

"Said the guy who brought down the leader of the robots while I had decided to ditch the group and needed to be bailed out by my own Queen, who, if not for the saving grace miracle of timing, might have ended up killing everyone I was trying to protect besides herself. Oh, also, let's not forget that if you hadn't brought down Blueblood and shut down the robot controls and Chrysalis still burnt out, the Empire would have then gotten overrun and that would have been the end of that story."

>But against Chitania-

"No one could do jackshit. Shining Armor needed to activate the first non-magical weapon of mass destruction in Chitania's face to weaken her enough to even give her bruising three days later."

>You're downplaying things.

"Well you want something not an exaggeration? How about my punches? Sure did miracles against Chitania, huh? The ol' one-two punch sent that bitch packing!"

42 smiles sadly

"And in the aftermath of Chitania, the robots, whatever, what the hell had I been doing? Punching things or shouting orders. Don't you get it, twerp, you're not as skilled of fighter as me, now, but one day, I'm just going to be a little bug. As a kid you've helped Shining Armor and 18 in more ways than I have, when you were confronted with a problem where force didn't work, you came up with a, very underhanded, mind you, trick to try to deal with the Queen."

>I nearly ruined everything, is what I did.

"And you know what? if the positions were reversed, if it was Twilight holding back a means to helping my Queen and I was in your shoes, I would have done much, much worse. Stop being so hard on yourself and come out the big house already... I'm sorry I tore into you... I guess I'm just upset that when it all boils down to it, through and through with this situation, I could honestly have done nothing even if I had known."

Spike tears up a bit

>What about us? I don't want to lose any friends, not after so long-

42 awkwardly hugs Spike, tearing up a bit herself

"I know... Changelings haven't much had the concept of friendship before, and I don't want to lose what we've got either... But even in the wake of all this, even if steps in the right direction have been made, a day may come when you and I are on opposite sides."

Spike sniffs

>I don't want that.

"I sure as hell don't either, which is why we gotta do our best to prevent it. For me, that means trying to keep my hoof on the pulse of the Queen's business and learn to put my own hoof down and learn the full situation of an encounter. For you, that means you can't try to betray yourself and start backstabbing, you also need to learn to stop being hard on yourself. You're still a kid in the end, a really damn accomplished one, but you need to give yourself more time."

The two fall into a comfortable silence for a moment

"But... Let's say the opposite happens, let's say this peace between our people bears real fruit and lasts for a long time. Like, more than a life time long."

>You're not going where I think you are, are you-

"Would you promise, and I know I'm not in any room to ask for favors right now, but still, could you please watch out for the hive when I'm gone?"

>Dammit, first you, then Shiny. Why the hell is everyone talking about dying now?!

"Because one way or another, Spike, it happens to us."

42 breaks from the hug and adjusts her helmet as she moves out of the cell

"It's another reason why I don't pursue things like 18 or the Queen, unlike 77, I know my life ends well before my natural span in a field of swords."

>Not if I can help it...

"Heh, now you're going to try to protect me even in our current position."

>I'll fight the will of heaven itself if I have to make it. It's taken me a long time to realize friendship myself, I'm not letting it go.

"Heh, 'Spike Versus the Gods', now that would be a match to see. Anyway though, I hope this talk helped clear your head, because I'm pretty sure Applejack's currently entombed in paperwork right now."

>It has... Thanks, 42.

"Hey... What are friends for?"

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non-canon
>Rarity
"Applejack"
~~~
>No...

"Pardon?"

>Th-The Nightmare Rarity Arc, it's been completely retconned from the thread's continuity!

"Oh... Uhhh, sorry? Ain't that a good thing-? ULK!"

>IT'S NOT A GOOD THING! YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE THAT ARC HAD INCREDIBLE MOMENTS BETWEEN ME AND SPIKE! HE REBUILT A JEWEL WITH HIS LOVE FOR ME!

"B-B-But ya'll have tha caverns-"

>Where jackshit happened! This is your doing isn't it?! I am not beyond further back at square one with this!!!

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>Applejack
"Spike"
'???'
---------

When he walked into her office, she knew. Without him having to say a word, she knew something beyond words had been troubling him and that he was in the final, melancholy stages of getting past it.

She didn't have time to feel bad for not being there for the bulk of it, to feel inadequate that someone else had somehow managed to help her dragon out of his slump.

No, next to Celestia, she was tirelessly working to ease the grip of madness over Equestria.

And he knew that. A multitude of feelings and words were conveyed through just one glance, and all the while her hoof never quit moving, never quit signing her name to bills and legislature.

>Yer' pile's over here, sugarcube.

"The one next to you?"

>The one next to me.

"Good...."

In silence he climbed into the chair and in silence he pulled over his stack, picked up a pen, and began to double-check what had already been signed, making corrections where they were needed.

>Careful when ya get to form sixty-four, sugar. Ah think that's one of the beetles again.

"Sixty-four? Sixty-four... sixty-four... sixty- ah! Got it. ...Yuuuup, that's definitely her, only because I sincerely doubt Celestia wants to make it so that Shiny must rut Changeling queens five times a day on sight."

>Hawh.

That trademark laugh of hers brought a wry smile to his face. Of course she'd known the bill was Chrysalis's from the beginning... but anything to prolong their time together was fine with him.

He didn't realize how much he'd missed sitting next to her, doing this brain-melting work, until he'd been deprived of it. So much so that he didn't even mind when a hat fell onto his head from above.

"..."
>...

"...Aren't you going to get upset because it didn't blow up, Ara'?"

'No. That one's just a regular hat, I took out the bomb. I just wanted to give you a get-well present.'

A burning sensation suddenly filled Spike's eyes and the document he'd been signing was suddenly peppered with a few drops of water.

"Ah... O-okay. Thanks."

>Welcome back, sugarcube.
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'Chrysalis'
"42"
>"18"

---

'So then I says, 'Oh no way, better get something sweet!' And then. he replies with--'

"Not in a million years?"

'...Eh, something like that.'

>"Face it, your majesty. He's not going to shag you. We can keep trying as is our mission set by yourself, but I'm not certain we shall ever succeed."

"You probably won't."

>"You might though. You're so tsundere it hurts."

"H-hey, shut up!"

>"See?"

'Ugh. Just thinking about him gets me all ready.'

"..."
>"..."

'Huh? Oh, sorry, forgot you two were here. I'll go. Be in my bunk, no calls.'

"..."
>"..."

"I hate when she constantly goes on ab... about S-shiny's d..."

>"Y'alright? Your nose is starting to bleed."

"...L-long... thick..."

>"Woah! Hey! It's... like a bloody waterfall."

"S-so shiny, wet...."

>"I think you may need a transfusion. I'm pouring love into you right now so that you don't die. But I will run out soon."
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'Jugglejack'
"Arctarius"
-Random Guard-

---

"Don't worry, it'll be a little cold at first, but I promise you it'll be fun, we'll go slow, okay?"

'O-okay...'

"Good, now take a deep breath..."

'Ahh~'

"That's it. Slowly, Slooooow-"

'N-NO! I can't do it! I-it's too big, Arc!'

-Just give up, Arctarius, they don't have pools that big in their ballroom, you'll never get him in.-

"Don't tell him what he can and can't do, dude! You don't know!"
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>29
"Cheerilee"
'MM'
[Trixie]
{Zecora}
~~~~~

>OH SWEET MERCY NO!

"What!? He counts!"

>How does that count!? Thine child is naught but the skinless creature of the damned from an age that hath no name!

"...Huh. Colstromo?"

>Aristocolt, actually.

"Wow, you ever think about teaching a literature class?"

'Hey! Don't try to steal my Niney!'

"Just offering."

[CAN WE PLEASE GET BACK TO THE SKINLESS THING SITTING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOM I THINK WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS!]

>Get off my ceiling.

[NEVER!]

{I understand her fear, he is quite frightening. His skin looks as if it was cooked by lightning.}

"He's an orphan!... Mostly because his parents were two beasts without names who consummated when the stars were not aligned and were banished beyond reality for their transgressions."

>Can he even speak?

"In a tongue of an age long past, yes."

>And you can translate?

"...Er..."

>...You know what? Mine heart leads me to act as if as a strike of thunder, quickly and loudly.


"Oh, good, so you'll-WAIT DON'T HUG HIM WAIT-"

*FLASH!*

"..."

>IT BURNS!

'ACK! NINEY!'

[HOLY SHIT THERE IS FIRE EVERYWHERE!]

{What were you thinking you think so daft?! Whole new pieces of skin to you we will have to graft!}

"...HOLY SHIT THAT WORKED!? I... I have no words. Hugs worked!? Bullshit! I was just trying to offload that thing onto someone else!"

>*KAFF!*...T-... the heart is a fickle thing, Cheerilee, above all it desires that which is most denied to it. To one who has only known fear and disgust, an act of love or caring is as alien as it may seem to others. A delicacy to be savored. A desire to be fulfilled. The heart beats in all, Cheerilee... the... heart...

*WHUMP!*

'GET BACK UP AND GO BACK TO TALKING SEXY!'

[{"..."}]

'...Tell me you didn't want him to.'

{...I did.}

[It was kind of nice.]

"No comment."

'Zecora? Got a... skin potion or something?'

She just shrugged, and whipped out a vial.

[Doesn't everyone?]
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NON-CANON
>Spike
"Chitania"
~~~~

>Alright, you know the drill. Rock Paper Scissors.

"Uh... sure..."

>Don't worry, you'll figure it out. One two three, SHOOT!

"..."

>...THE FUCK!?

"Ha ha."

>Wha- you can't use disguise magic to make scissors!

"Can so."

>That's against the rules!

"It's against the rules to have your appendage change shape to fit what you want to use?"

>...

"Step aside, scaly."

>So much friggen bullshit...

"I'll leave one or two left for you. Maybe."

>So... much...
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>Cheerilee
"Fluttershy"
~~~~

>NO! BAD YELLOWHORSE!

"But he's so cuddly!"

>He is a thing without life, that which was formed by the malicious thoughts of a thousand scorned lovers! His breath is as fire, his teeth as thorns, and his soul the blackest of- ARE YOU GIVING HIM BELLY RUBS!?

"Who's a good boy!? HUH!? YOU IS! YES YOU IS!"

>He's the darkest creature in the nine realms of his hell!

"And he's a snuggy wuggy buggy boo, yes he is!"

>...Is he ENJOYING this!?

"Oh yes, all animals love to be doted on, that's just a universal fact."

>He's not an animal! He is a shape of malignant thought! Nothing but a giant ball of fury, fur and hate!

"OOOOOOHHHH... they're called cats, Cheerilee."
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>Chrysalis
"Applejack"
~~~~~

"Why do ya'll keep throwin' these in here!? Ah' swear, iffin' Ah' see one more thing sayin' "Anal don't count", "It don't count iffin' ya' ain't lookin'" or "Tuesdays don't count", Ah'll lose mah' goddang cookies! HE DOESN'T LIVE HERE! THIS WOULDN'T AFFECT HIM!"

>I know.

"THEN WHY!?"

>Honestly? Just for fun. I can't believe it worked the first time, considering. In fact, I've actually been grabbing those 'thank you' letters those husbands keep sending you. I have this gigantic pile in my room. I know, I know, you can't catch lightning in a bottle twice, but it's fun! And besides, 18's too thorough. Translate an infiltrators need to get intimate details in a pony to scanning for errors on a page. I don't have a chance with her.

"...Couldn't she just push it through too? Would... would anyone notice before it got signed into law?"

>Yes and nope, respectively. Shiny trusts her not to put anything weird in there.

"...Can ya' stop? Ah'm genuinely worried Ah'm gonna pass another one, it's nerve wrackin'."

>Naah, this is too much fun.

"..."

>...You want me to read some excerpts from the letters?

"Please don't."

>Dear Princess Applejack, my secretary has just recently gotten a raise, and she would like to thank you-

With a groan, head hit desk. Chrysalis continued on, unabated.

"Kill me..."

>-and that's when I knew she was the right babysitter!
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>18
"Chrysalis"
'42'
~~~

>Oh sweet love, these are amazing!

"I know, right!?"

'Dear Princess Applejack, do you know that place on ninth street that has the little hay-squares? I don't know it all that well, but I know a lot about it's bathrooms!'

>Dear Princess Applejack, no more do I have to use the 'she tripped and fell on it' excuse, and I am a happier stallion because of it!

"Dear Princess Applejack, I think I really hurt her eye, can I sue you because of that? I feel like you should be liable somehow."

>Dear Queen Chrysalis, I am going to beat you within an inch of your life for making me sort through this shit. I am not kidding. I will stab you in the face. I shall drink your blood. Vengeance shall be mine.

"...Think that one was from Applejack."

'Or Spike.'

>Or Celestia.

"Could've been a lot of ponies, actually."

'...'

>...Dear Princess Applejack, my throat hurts...
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Non-canon. I was just easily amused by the comic.

>SS
"Potatojack"
~~~~~
>Potatojack, Hey Potatojack! Can we go and hang out with DT?

"No you have to dodge this pine cone." *PONK*

>Nyoro~n...
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Non-canon of course.
>SS
"Spike"
~~~~

>Spike-kun, Hey Spike-Kun. Can I have your milkshake in the club fridge?

"I already drank it."

>Nyoro~n...
___________________
>SS
"77"
'42'
~~~~
> 77, hey 77! Can I join the club?

"Ask 42."

>42-chi, hey 42-chi! Can I join the club?

42 punches SS in the face.

>Nyoro~n...
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>Applejack
"Jugglejack"
~~~~

>...

"...Sooo... sign it?"

>...I... ugh. Okay, Jugglejack? Just level with me here. Why do ya'll think you need a permission slip to leave the castle for more than a few hours?

"Well, I mean, I just want to make sure it's okay."

>I-... ugh. It's fine.

"You sure? I don't want to get caught walking in the hall without a hall pass, 56 says that's a real big issue."

>...It... it's an issue when he's in school.

"And?"

>And yer' not in school.

"Well, yeah? 56 says he only needs them if he leaves the class, so he isn't in school when it happens."

>...Ah... Ah' do not.... ya' know what, Jugglejack? Ya' ever see anyone else ask fer' one o' these?

"Well, no, but-"

>Well, Ah'm proud of you. Ya' know what? Ah' am so proud that Ah' am going to fill out a lifetime hall pass. Ya' can leave the castle anytime ya' want, whenever ya' want. Just tell someone where yer' gonna be iffin' yer' gonna be gone a while, and ya' can leaven whenever.

"Wow, really!?"

>Really. Free as a bird.

"Wow, thanks Princess Applejack!"

>S'what Ah' do. Go on, go see yer' friend-

"HE'S NOT MY COLTFRIEND!"

>...

"...Uh, sorry, thought you said..."

>...

"...Yeah... BYE!"

*FUCKINGGONE!*

>...Wonder iffin' Ah' can still move mah' bet over in the pool...
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